what is this board for again, why did I come here. I thought I could just be friends with people who are losers like me, and have no chance at being social play vidya all night, talk about how life sucks for us right? . I was wrong I guess, all it did for me, was develop a new found hate for every person ever, build a extremely defensive and aggressive personality that drives people away further than before. Started to get hurt by simple things in friendships, started being extremely cautious at the most stupid things, and started deleting people, adding them back, deleting them... because i was insecure and wasn't sure if they were actual friends. Every month I would search for a new group of people who I could play with, possibly relate to, but all I could do was look at the negative side of everything. Soon this negativity started growing into my beliefs on relationships and now I really think love isn't real anymore, I read too many of this threads where women state all the reasons that they hate men, and starting believing them, read too many threads where men state why they hate women and believing that. I started having all these things ingrained and drilled into my head, to the point where I see a relationship and start judging the people in it harshly, "the woman is probably using the guy" "the guy is probably using the girl" if the man isn't using the woman, then the woman has to be using the man, there's no reason for her to be with him, there's no reason for him to be with her, etc.
>>27570182
I started judging my mother and father, wondering why they were together, they would fight a lot with each other and I think the only reason they wont leave each other is because they don't want to disappoint me or their religious beliefs. These thoughts later made relationships with women from hard to impossible for me, because I started worrying if i would give off the vibe that i'm using her, or if she would give off signals that she doesn't really care about me and just wants to use for for her attention, verification, money etc. I started to dislike who I was not only how I looked, or acted, but who I was as a person, what I think, my choices themselves. I started thinking to myself i'm just a terrible human being, i'm a man-child who will never grow up, i'm and idiot that wont learn to ignore things, once this place got a little more popular it got worse and started really hating myself because of the things that I would pay attention to. The new people who joined(not sure when this started, two years is when I noticed, but maybe its been longer) saw that many of us were weak minded targets who they could use, men and women alike. Guys say that the girls who were here were unstable and extremely easy to lure with false hope to a happy relationship taking every little bit of innocence and self-esteem they had left, while the girls who came saw that they could build entire harems of beta males who would pay for every expense ever and verify that they were amazing in every way and making each one believe they were theirs.
>>27570205
Once I saw this happen, I completely lost hope in relationships thinking this might happen to me, have to avoid them at all cost, I followed the 2d trend life, got a shit tier waifu and dint care what people thought. Lived that way till present(I went on r9k when i was very young) still young now, but not underage.) made weabo friends who I dint care about, who i tried to avoid getting attached to, people who would hide their despair behind memes and jokes like I do. Sometimes wondering I could ever make a friend who wouldn't be just all memes and jokes not just online, but in real life. Someone who I could connect on a deep personal Level and back to r9k I would go, but again be told how i'm just a loser, how there's literally nothing good about me, how i'm stuck in the past, and have shit taste in every spectrum ever, I agree with them, go back to believing never being able to find a good friend who wouldn't tell me to kms over liking something. Sometimes my loyalty to my waifu, my "Neverleavewaifu" never stuck and every now and then I would look for a relationship once again, thinking maybe I could find a girl who is also extremely lonely but seemingly normal in real life because they don't want anyone to notice how many problems they have, how much a failure they are, how much they don't believe in themselves someone who I could give hope and tell they are fine, they are the best because they already tried their hardest.
>>27570220
I then found a girl who was all of this, but more, almost like a mirror to myself, someone who I thought connected with me on a deep level, who understood my struggles. But later I realized it was all fake, how she left me and moved on to a better guy not even months later to give her greater validation than I could give. Everyone leaves everything for something better, people are not exceptions. My insecurities started to grow so much more, I pushed this girl away, slowly until she was no longer my friend, and I remained alone once again. Trying to push away all my feelings by creating this delusional world around me and my waifu... but it only last so long before i come back to this board... looking for people who may or may not understand me again.
sometimes people add me expecting this much level of though into everything i type... but im actually quite an stupid idiot LOL... these last sentences im typing without much thinking into them because I hate sounding like a fedora fag who trying to get compassion out of most of the normies who are here, FUCK OFF MAN... uhh yeah/ zzz holy fuck re-reading this, its actually pretty fucking cringe... but too lazy to go over it 9000 time and edit what my thoughts on this board and my life idk...
damn this is some pretty sad shit OP
WELL YOU SEE my fellow 2D lover, you're missing something.
Romantic love really isn't real. It's not that it's unattainable. It just does not make conceptual sense. What do you gain from attaching the title of "girlfriend" to a female friend? Nothing! It's pointless and if you have multiple female friends, there's no reason to try and view one of them above the rest via this title.
Childbirth is also immoral. Creating sentience is immoral, especially when it's not immortal.
With all life, there is death. Your parents gave you life, so they are responsible for your death. They are quite literally murderers.
You know what I mean?
>>27570468
I gain the right to say, they are mine, as do they. To spend time together for eternity... i don't know, i'm a fucking loser who will never gain anything meaningful in life, so i turn to a fake relationship and hope one day i go insane enough so i cant tell the difference between it and reality.
>>27570570
You have to resist that temptation! If you make friends who you fully respect then the eternity thing will come naturally.
Oh right and I think having just 1 waifu is bad for similar reasons why believing in love is bad. I think it's best to anime girls equally since 1 day you might be in the mood for one and another day you might be in the mood for another.
>>27570570
Sometimes I dream of creating my immortal waifu, but usually their personalities are based on normal people, and I remember that I am very incompatible with those people.
>>27570710
desu, I just seem to have a waifu around so that I don't drive myself to suicide by being this lonely.
>>27570182
THIS THIS THIS OP
I'm starting to literally hate normies, and even when I get the opportunity to join them, I can't help it, but my mind links normies to evil people
Dude do you have a skype? I can feel you're a good person
>>27571012
i'm not sure i should post my skype right away on this board....
[email protected] is my throwaway email.
>>27570182
I feel the same way OP
This place has ruined me, utterly. I've been here for about 5 years now and my life is just a fucking obliterated, blown out husk of what it used to be.
I've always been a loser but now I'm just a fucking imploding shell of dead skin.
The worst thing about this place is that there is always that kernel of truth behind all the lies that you can't ignore. Every single thing starts to point back to these seeds of pure, bitter truth and there's no way to avoid it anymore. Every look you get and every offhand remark you hear from across the room in real life, you can see the putrid stinking shit behind all of it and all you can do is sit there and die a little bit more inside and pretend to ignore the fact that the world is a fucking awful place.
>>27570205
protip you are using her. she's also using you. it's called mutual benefit
>>27571179
I have nothing going on for me, but idk, I still can say life has it's beauty
daydreaming about being reborn as chad is a kinda fuzzy feeling
>>27571296
>Chad
>Not wanting to be reborn as a girly-looking boy
>>27571216
That's more of depending on one another, giving each other a hand if they fall etc. like a friendship, that's as close you will get to love, but sooner or later, they one of them will find someone who they depend on better someone who can help them get up better.
>>27570182
/pol/ will fix you, it fixed me. Haven't been on /r9k/ in months desu, I just came back curious to see how the gentlemen would react to the google plus normie layout (disappointed tbqhwu)
>>27571296
>>27571325
Even chad gets cucked, by other chads, or worse Tyrone.
>>27570182
When you are cornered like a fox, which is the same as your predicament, it's time for you to get a life by seeking the light. There is intrinsic value in everyone, a worth that can be used to better everyone's living conditions, for we all suffer to some extent, some more than others. No Man, No Woman, is an island. Think about your self-pity, and turn it instead to self-compassion. Self-Pity, which is what you radiate here, is the first step towards Self-Compassion. You need to be strong, because your inner conviction wants a better life for your suffering soul. Then, the joy of living will breathe within the wind that you give off.
>>27571342
I've been to /pol/ it hasnt fixed me, it just tells me to ignore things, and say fuck you to life. I love life, why would I ever do that, I just really dislike the people who take it and do what they want with it.
>>27570182
This is pretty much me. Not even this place that did it to me though, it was personal experience for me.
No. This place is for robots. Not failed normalfags like you. If you enjoy social interactions you can go ahead and fuck off, idiot.
>>27571384
It also sounds like your parents cling to you in some way, meaning that childbirth of yours was for you have a purpose. You can't surrender to the darkness. Seek the light. Shape the world towards your own value and what you want the love of humanity to be.
>>27571434
uhh Robot is something that fails to be a normie... Shalom?
I feel like OP needs to talk stuff out.
I'll be on omegle with the r9k interest. Just say "candlelight" and I'll recognize you.
>>27571444
I am scared for my life right now, because I am failing every class in college. They want me to be successful person with a degree who isn't poor like them, they really want me to be educated. I don't really think they care if i'm rich, or not, just really want me to not be an uneducated slob and be well off so that I don't go through same things they did.
you really are a loser
how could you let a meme anime board affect your life
might as well just kill yourselfor just try to get a grip in your life, you fucking faggot
>>27570710
>having more than one waifu
You're real funny, anon.
