>"You have to love yourself before anyone can love you, Anon."
>always try to be nice to everyone
>always try to be the best person that I can possibly be
>always super friendly
>hate myself so women never want to do anything with me
>Chad loves himself
>bullies nerds and losers all the time
>women love him because he loves himself
>>27569131
Also check that Dawn Mcgee get
Again, the reverse is true. You can't love anyone unless you were loved. See: mirror neurons.
>>27569153
Seriously
Some people are just fucked due to circumstances it seems.
I feel like that's me. I have family who loves me but no one has ever loved me in a romantic sense, so I don't know how to love anyone.
>>27569131
where exactly is the problem? chad is probably more thoughtful with the girls he fucks around with, and even if he isn't then most average dudes definitely are. if you gave as little shit about chad as chad does about you then maybe you could focus on improving yourself.
>was nice in high school
>girls wanted to date me
>got laid at 17 and it was nonstop from there
>sometimes hated myself
oh and nothing you said was even true to begin with.
>>27569131
>"You have to love yourself before anyone can love you"
Really popular saying but it means a bunch of nothing. It paints this false dichotomy in the first place, it implies infatuation is some magical force that just sort of happens. Loving yourself or not has little to do with it. When I was at my lowest self esteem I had the most girls after me, and the most friends.
Now I'm doing well mentally, but I have absolutely 0 friends. I'm confident, I like who I am, but that doesn't make me any less unappealing to people.
>>27569186
what circumstances would you have wanted where you could make the exact same choices you did and still be loved sufficiently?
i wish that someone would just give me a mansion lol
>remember the theme song to that cartoon the girl in OP's image
>"Something tells me I've been dreaming of someone who was never real"
I... I never asked for these feels
>>27569198
>oh and nothing you said was even true to begin with.
Except that I've been told multiple times by girls I liked in HS that I need to love myself before anyone could ever love me back.
Personally I think it's bullsht.
>>27569217
My nigga
I think I'm going to reach a state of confident self-hatred one day, where I'm unhappy and don't want to live, but I'm sick of people walking all over me, so I defend myself anyway.
>>27569239
>what circumstances would you have wanted where you could make the exact same choices you did and still be loved sufficiently?
That's not what I was getting at though.
I mean some people might be born into an unloving household where they might be abused or neglected by their parents or something. These people have issues.
>>27569131
Why do you think that faking being nice will get you any pussy ? it's not the " assholish " side of chad charachtar that attracts the women , it's the confiedence and humor , if you have confidence and humor you can be nice or an asshole and still pull it off , matter of fact if you're funny and nice you will get even more women than asshole and funny.
while you a robot , were behaving nicely , you also were boring as hell to be with , that's why you got no pussy
>>27569285
what those girls meant was that you should stop whining all the time and/or being boring.
how awkward were you that you couldn't get a straight answer from people? i had to hear all sorts of shit about me before i learned to get with girls. loving yourself has jack shit to do with anything. you can bet your ass like 1/3 of all the people you are jealous of hate themselves to some extent.
>>27569318
>Why do you think that faking being nice will get you any pussy
Why do you assume that I fake being nice?
We're all complicated people at the end of the day, but mostly I feel compelled to be courteous and kind to almost everyone I meet.
>>27569318
why do you assume he was faking being nice? honestly are you a girl or something?
>>27569363
Doesn't really matter if it's fake or real , there's really no "prize" for being nice , it's just how you are , man.
>>27569389
And yet why do people frequently reward assholes?
>>27569363
doesn't sound very complicated. sounds like you expect something to happen from being nice without really understanding why you would be nice. not just by the compulsive behavior, but by your retarded shitpost too.
see a therapist for fucks sake or something.
>>27569404
Why do you think they reward assholes ? that's how it seems from the outside , but what they are rewarding is his confidence , humor/charisma , the ability to not give a shit what others think of him
You have to be attractive for people to love you, and you need people to love you in order for you to love yourself.
It's all halo effect and positive/negative reinforcement.
>>27569404
those assholes are assholes to you though, for legitimate reasons. if you don't reward them in return then your point is moot.
>>27569425
>sounds like you expect something to happen from being nice without really understanding why you would be nice.
Not really. I'm not sure why people like you make assumptions like this either.
It's to the point where people just attack males who happen to be very nice out of nowhere.
>>27569431
Why do they not give a damn how much of a jerk he is?
>>27569457
>for legitimate reasons.
And what would those be?
>>27569285
>I think I'm going to reach a state of confident self-hatred one day, where I'm unhappy and don't want to live, but I'm sick of people walking all over me, so I defend myself anyway.
It doesn't need to be self hatred. For the most part, people are confident based on the reactions and validations of those around them. They build their self value based on their social status, around their friends, around compliments they get, around an idea of self image and ego.
Unfortunately we don't all get to have that. I was too strange for other people, too different, not attractive enough, not socially valued. My obvious choice was to withdraw from society. I didn't go outside much. I felt bad for a long time.
But then the boredom set in. I started improving myself. I was really into music, so I would play for hours all day every day. From the time I woke up to the time I went to sleep. I wouldn't even eat a lot of the times. Eventually I got really good.
Then I started exercising. Studying languages, learning, becoming better. O travelled a bit. It was a slow process, but eventually I noticed myself become apathetic to other people. I had built my own self value, and off of something tangible.
When a girl looked at me and laughed or people stared at me, I no longer cared. I realized I didn't actually care what they thought of me. What have they accomplished in life? What hardships have they faced without support? You don't have to hate yourself
>>27569404
because people are plebs. assholes are infrequent with their favor, plebs unconsciously assume this means their favor holds more value so they seek to gain it.
Nice guys are nice to almost everyone, so their favor holds no value, women resent being praised constantly for mundane things from people who dont even know them, most people do.
>>27569463
first is because humen in general are assholes as well they find assholish behaviours amusing beause it's what our paretns taught us not to do , and second is why should they ? if you're friend with someone who makes fun of some sperg , do you think that's enough reason to dump him ? like 99.99% of people would just laugh along , maybe feel a little bad on the inside but don't care enough to bring it up.
>>27569505
>Unfortunately we don't all get to have that. I was too strange for other people, too different, not attractive enough, not socially valued.
Precisely.
>eventually I noticed myself become apathetic to other people. I had built my own self value, and off of something tangible.
This is what I strive for.
>>27569507
>because people are plebs. assholes are infrequent with their favor, plebs unconsciously assume this means their favor holds more value so they seek to gain it.
My nigga
When you get at the core of things, plebs are the cause of all this suffering. They are stupid.
>Nice guys are nice to almost everyone, so their favor holds no value, women resent being praised constantly for mundane things from people who dont even know them, most people do.
Honestly, I've been complimented by strangers in the past and a little compliment goes a long way to making your day better.
If you don't love yourself, and believe that you can never love yourself until you are loved, then heed my advice.
Stay the fuck away from women.
Steer clear for your own sake.
Maybe the television and the movies and the touchy feely media tell you that everyone will love you for who you are and everyone is happy and considerate in a land of rainbows and ponies.
But the cold hard truth is that people will take advantage of you if you aren't sure of yourself.
Maybe they don't even mean to. Or maybe they do.
But no human being can respect someone who doesn't have confidence in themselves.
I'm no misanthrope. I think people are good at the end of the day. But you can't change the natural law of the world.
If you hate yourself, and you got a girlfriend, what do you think will happen? If you can't stand your ground, and demand something back, if you can't keep control of the relationship, your woman is going to start walking over you. It might start off as taking favours from you without giving back. Then, as she realises that she can get away with stepping on you, she will start cheating on you, ruining your life, controlling you.
Right now, start working on having confidence. Start working on loving yourself.
Alternatively, if you think that it is impossible to get confidence, that start learning to enjoy being alone, and finding solace in your solitude.
Because getting into a relationship is a terrible idea if you have no confidence
People that don't love themselves deserve to be loved most of all in my opinion, it took me a long ass time to realize how much I actually love myself. I don't like myself at all and people can smell how insecure it makes you. People be drawn to that confidence.
>>27569389
It's a prize in itself, making people feel good feels good.
>>27569318
Not necessarily true.
>>27569605
This is the kind of advice that I seek.
Honestly, fuck women in general, they're worthless.
>>27569609
>people can smell how insecure it makes you.
This is so fucked up. Why don't people try to build up others' confidence?
>>27569505
That's the exact oppisote of how confident person is created , see , self image is very fragile thing , if you've been told all your life that you're beautiful and bunch of guys make fun of your nose for example , they will cursh that self image , you will start questioning yourself " Am I living a lie ? that isn't who I am ? I don't want to see myself as ugly" and all of that creats endless suffering
The key to confidence ( I have achieved it , but I still frequent /r9k/ for shit and giggles ) is to completly lose your self image , you have to know the difference between opinions and reality , and at first you have to stop believing others compliments , because when you believe others compliments you will believe their criticism as well , and when you believe their criticism, you will question yourself and keep suffering.
>>27569697
Actually this post makes more sense.
>>27569655
I don't know why they don't, I can't claim to know. Building people up is worthy of praise. It's not necessary, but he who does so may as well be exalted in my eyes.
>>27569697
No need to suffer, your inner beauty shines straight through. Ain't nobody perfect but everyone has qualities that are worthy of admiration.
>>27569697
Hurt me
Dhhdh
>>27569318
>it's the confiedence and humor
Except that Chads are never funny
>>27569131
>>27569318
>Be asshole
"Ugh, he is such a jerk. I would never want to have anything to do with that creep"
>Be geniunely nice
"Ugh, he is such a pushover. I bet he is compensating for his small dick"
or
>be asshole
"Your toxic personality is what makes people hate you, anon"
>Be geniunely nice
"LMAO KEK DETECTED HOW DOES IT FEEL TO BE KEKED RIGHT NOW BETABUX CHAD STACY KEK JEWS BBC"
Damned if you do, damned if you dont.
