ITT: post something 100% factual about yourself that no one will believe.
No girl has ever been interested in me. I'm a handholdless hugless kissless virgin.
My wife (16) is pregnant and I'm not a poo-in-loo or snackbar or squatter or any of that.burst toast
I am typing with my penis right now
My first sexual experience was a threesome with 2 older girls when I was some age around 7.
I regularly have sex with cute teenagers tying them to my radiator, spanking their asses blistered and fucking them hard in every hole before I come on their cute young faces.
>>27453736
I once photobombed Jeremy Shada (the guy who voices Finn on adventure time) in San Diego when he was taking photos with some fans
I've also met William Shatner
I am not a fag.. 100%?
I touched a vagina with my penis with the sole purpose of having sex. I was 5-6 at the time.
2 dicks have been in my butt and vice versa.
>>27453736
>tfw life is so average there's nothing you can even think of
>>27453801
>100% factual
>7 year old knows what sex is
keep it up
I once jokingly said in school how a mummy was "hot" and that I would "sleep with it" and ended up in the therapists office where I learned about necrophilia.
>>27453833
Stop kidding yourself, you're totally gay
Now get over here and let me pound that tight little boi pussy
>>27453736
I'm the prime minister of Russia.
>>27453736
I am a female and lost my virginity to my younger brother when I was 12.
>>27453874
yeah
they woukd probably
in second grade i asked my mom, who was a retired nurse
instead of lying, or giving a shitty explanation, she pulled up a medical book and explained in detail, down to meiosis and shit. Science yo.
>>27453775
What's a "poo-in-loo?"
>>27453736
I've been banging my cousin on and off for the last 7 years, been cucking her husband (without his knowledge) for the last 2
Not gonna lie, it's pretty fucking great
>>27453917
An Indian you moron.
>>27453891
I actually think my life would be a whole lot easier if I was gay. I even have some womanish habits, and everyone seems to think I'm gay.
I still can't help but to dream about fucking a pussy one day, in the mean time I'm just gonna sit here and fuck myself with toothbrushes and such.
>>27453899
>I am a female
Yeah. Right. Stopped right there.
In 2014 I was doing about an ounce of cocaine a day between myself and my three flatmates.
>>27453874
>that no one will believe.
Sounds about right then.
Also, I never said I initiated it. The 2 girls were older, they clearly were the ones who led me into it. Use your head, cmon anon.
I flew a plane
I'm not much of an interesting person
I was a golden glove boxer
threw it all away because DUDE WEED
The regret and pain of my wasted life has rendered me a social recluse.
>>27453917
>>27453933
moron or newfag; i definitely don't smell shit so
>>27453736
I won a car in a raffle when I was 12. It was given to my college chad brother so he could fuck girls and do cocaine in it.
I never got to drive the car.
>>27453736
I co-sleep with my parents and I'm 23.
met jeremy shockey during a pre-game warm up
>>27453898
Boy I hope this is true
I am Bill Murray.
I once saved a kid from drowning in a YMCA pool and never told anyone.
I was in 4th grade and thought I would get in trouble for diving back in when they told us not to.
I'm actually a sociopath
>>27453956
>my life would be a whole lot easier if I was gay
Part of you already acknowledges that you're gay, and you even admit that you masturbate with your butt.
One day you're gonna realize you've just been practicing for the real thing, and on that day, your real life is going to begin.
>>27453963
If I had the means, I'd be there too. About 2 grams a weekend over here
I played games with high level pros in sc2 and LoL.
stopped playing both because I got a gf
i broke my arm at age 6 because a kid dared me to
>>27454021
c r i n g e y
l a d
>>27454052
>I played games (which are stupid inherently) for stupid children and am proud of it
Dad has 80 million in his bank account and owns a very big business, and owns 2 Lamborghini aventadors as well as about 30 different motorcycles.
>>27453736
When I was 16 I learned Swedish by myself to near fluency just because I thought it sounded cool.
>>27454021
You are a faggot and I hope you stub your toe
>>27453736
i haven't told anyone this..
>inb beta looser
lost a usb at the local internet cafe with some really really shady shit on it.
who /WHY/?
>>27454087
spotted the bronze
>>27453736
My car got a flat a month ago and I put on a spare all by myself. It made me feel like a big boy.
>>27454079
kek story pls
>>27454034
I don't think I have to be 100% gay because of this. I think that there is an infinite spectrum between the straight and gay mentality and I drop somwhere in between.
My biggest dream above all is raising a child, I'm just doing a really shitty job in attaining that dream because I'm a 25yo virgin.
>>27453736
>my uncle is a former professional football player
>my dad might be running for state premier at the next election
>I am a national medalist in my old sport
>I saw a girl's body all mangled up when I was 9ish
I dated some famous singer's sister for about a week
>>27454107
>not encrypting your usb
You were asking for it.
Blew up a part of a forest with dynamite with friends when we were drinking. I think we were about 17.
>>27453736
I got the 1 millionth post on /cm/. Thats probably my life's biggest accomplishment.
My half Japanese girlfriend is asleep on my lap right now. She's tired because we had sex twice (I finished twice, she probably finished more) earlier in the evening after I took her on an expensive dinner date to a nice French restaurant. 100% truth.
I'm not gay but my first and only sexual encounter was with I guy I convinced I was gay. This was years ago, and nothing has happened to me sexually since.
>>27454134
what sport did you play?
fucked a model when i was 16, she was 19 and paid off for shit whenever we went out
>>27453736
i can make origional posts even if the content i am posting is nonsensical and or unorigional.
>>27454117
Conratulations
I lost my virginity to a really good looking 30 year old fashion designer/dancer who had her own clothing line.
>>27454139
>not naming the singer
She isn't that famous
>>27454086
>>27454105
No one believes me :^)
I invented the whole >implying, Greentext thing.
And I hate it.
>>27453874
I'm the actual OP of the commemt you replied to. I made that shit up. My bad if anyone was actually stupid enough to believe it tho.
>>27454143
it was just the dumbest mistake ever.
i believe it's waiting on karma; because someone definitely has it somewhere...
i'll just have to be well behaved forever :')
>>27454117
good, one step closer to reaching your true power
Bhe.. sono italiano e mi chiamo mario, mio fratello luigi, ahh ovvio ho i baffi e dio proco, mi piace il rosso e le bretelle.
>>27454240
We believe you, but being proud of being a sociopath is pure faggotry
I have a genetic mutation where I look completely like a woman but I'm biologically male. I was raised as a girl and didn't find out until around the age most girls hit puberty.
Talked about this once in a rare medical condition thread a long time ago.
Moot posted in my Planetside thread on /v/ years and years ago.
>>27454240
>No one believes me :^)
can't be a sociopath and use such a stupid smiley as ":^)"
my bet is you're just an emo fag who listens to shit like BVB and auto-claims to be a sociopath
>>27453736
What's funny is that I could post "I'm a girl" and nobody would believe it.
>>27454292
Name of condition?
>>27454240
>>27454021
It really isn't hard to trick your local doctor of this.
maybe you are on the record for being a sociopath, but you're for sure a g a y c u n t
>>27454301
I'd believe you s-senpai
My parents are scientologists
Bill Nye the science guy is my cousin.
No, really.
>>27454197
Taekwondo
bloxbloxbloxblox
i'm a college dropout and I make 80k. i expect to make 110k+ at my next job (lol programming)
>>27454308
Complete Androgen Insensitivity Syndrome. Phenotypically female and biologically male.
>>27454126
it's really not that elaborate
>be me
>6 years old
>2nd grade
>fucking around with my mate on playground
>jumping off the ladder on slide to see if we could
>big ass slide, 10 feet tall i think
>mate gets an idea
>neither of us had ever broken a bone
>really curious, somehow no one else had
>he wants us to try
>he goes first, doesn't do it properly
>my turn
>basically nosedive from 4-5 feet up
>everything is a blur
>broke wrist, still crunches if i move it in the right way
>12+ years later i don't remember shit about how it feels due to shock+time
i got a pretty cool blue cast though. 5/7 would contemplate doing again
>>27453989
Did you crash it with no survivors?
I cross dressed and danced to Burmese music in an Asian new year performance for $80
>>27454368
no but I started dry heaving from the pressure sickness (first flight in an unpressurized plane), would have threw up if I ate anything that day
>>27454246
>implying you did
I once successfully ran away from a police car with sirens chasing me. Naked.
I dressed as a girl and went with a boy to a highschool final year ball and neither of us went to the school
>>27454450
Greentext please sir
I'm related to a pretty famous hair stylist that works in hollywood. He was nominated for an oscar before
I was able to submit 3 different people using 3 different leg locks who were all fully resisting and fighting back today (well technically yesterday I guess since it is around 12:30 now).
>>27454367
>remembering more shit
>descended from a dude who got killed by a ghost
>could have been related to semifamous ww2 era singer
>win(?)cest'd my bitch stacy sister when i was 8 (i regret that heavily)
>accidentally vandalized a car
>got called a terrorist
>>27454492
The synopsis sounds more glorious than the actual story.
>be at college party
>a few of us decide to go streaking
>wheeeeee
>whoops, flashing red and blue lights
>scramble, I run into the bushes and wait for them to pass
>go back to party
>>27454450
Wasn't naked and they didn't have sirens on but did the same.
>mfw hiding in the bushes and hoping that the cops are stupid enough to just pass by
>mfw they were
>>27454358
Shit, what does that do?
>>27453736
I once pissed blood for a month. I'm a guy.
>>27454450
is it really that uinbelievable? i know people who were on probation and when the police came to bust a party, they ran in the woods. its pretty crazy but ive heard it before
now the fact that you were naked, thats pretty intense
>>27454551
Pros:
-never had acne
-my legs/underarms/pussy are hairless
-nice chest (one of the side effects is "well developed breasts", oddly enough)
cons:
-infertile
-possible difficulty having sex
-mentally it messed me up a lot to find out
I'm an attractive, educated, ambitious woman that enjoys partying and drinking and Ive only ever been with one man in my life, with the relationship beginning aged 15. We're 25 now and still together.
This isn't very interesting but it falls into the "stuff /robots/ wouldn't believe" category.
I've also been using 4chan since 2006. idk. My life isn't very interesting.
>>27454334
rad, how does it feel knowing that you're jackie chan
>>27454669
post feet sIut
>>27454661
So basically you were born a trap?
I personally know and have been in the house and on the boat of Rick Astley.
I don't even... I'm genuinely pathetic and have never done anything interesting or crazy in my life.
can you believe that?
uh.. i've been using 4chan since i was 12 years old
>>27454716
Don't traps have to have dicks?
>>27453736
I have a full-time career job and have had sex with multiple women in my life.
>tfw i'm not special at all
>>27453833
Two butts have been in your dick? That sounds awful.
>>27453736
I won the "Biggest Butt" award at my generation's last party in the end of Highschool. I singlehandedly BTFO'd every womyn in my whole generation as the title wasn't divided by gender.
Had sex with my cousin the weekend after that.
I've had legitimate girls actually take interest in me before
>>27454681
>tfw no bf
that's how it feels
I once met Stan Lee just walking through Atlanta
I went swimming with a couple dolphins and it was the most magical moment of my life.
>>27454661
So what about you biologically is male?
I have a girlfriend I live with who financially supports me completely and I just lay around watching cartoons and playing video games and drinking.
I got both genital and oral herpes and I am a KV
>>27454990
How?
Originaloriginal bloxbloxbloxblox
I used to wear 5 layers of underwear and masturbate in it in all week.
Only changed layers 2-3 times a month and wore it to school.
>>27454367
>5/7
get the fuck out reddit trash
>>27454971
I have XY chromosomes and testes instead of ovaries.
>>27453736
I truthfully am God.
>>27453775
16? Holy shit, is your son gonna be a bastard?
>>27453804
Degenerates and all of their derivatives are pretty united, so this isn't strange.
>>27454004
Stop that shit. You're definitely cockblocking them.
>>27454021
w o a h
e d g y
>>27454052
>LoLtard
>gf
Completely not surprising. Girls suck that shit way too much, I see this so much at college. They don't play it, though.
>>27454097
I'm also from the richer families in my state and I'm still a beta faggot.
>>27454669
Is your man, rich?
>>27454845
Just flex and ninja some shit up and you'll be drowning in the dicks
>>27453736
I'm a woman and also a robot.
I'm a girl btw ;^*
>>27455035
Kek, so is your clit like a micropenis/clit hybrid?
>>27455006
no clue desu, i thought maybe from my parents at birth
but i made they get tested and they dont have it
>>27454990
through blowjobs?
Everyone knows you only get herpes through sex and that if you have it means you're either a nigger or slut
>>27455041
>is your man, rich?
Nope, we're both dirt poor, newly graduated students. I actually earn more money than him atm.
>>27455071
Nah, it's normal sized for a girl. My body can't process testosterone so it never masculinized. It's just the internal stuff that's fucked up.
>>27454845
If you're a girl I'll be your bf ;^)
I once flew into the sun
>>27455082
Shit, that's.... good I guess?
What makes you browse 4chimpanzee, anyways?
I basically grew up in solitary confinement and can't function in society on my own.
>>27455089
be my bf gf
>>27454669
You're also a degenerate slut
>>27454987
Is she ok with it or is it one of those "she tell you to find a job but doesn't have the guts to force you into anything"?
Because if it's the former, I'm jelly
>>27455078
never had any sexual contact with anyone, not even a kiss
>>27455099
I'm a 6'4'' guy with a 7.2" dick. If you're a twink you can be my bf
>>27455052
>Just flex
That's the plan gym errryy day 'till it makes up for being a bit of a wanker
Even though I've been playing bass for 6 years, I think I'm pretty garbage and am embarrassed to talk to real musicians about theory or play style.
I do have patrician as fuck taste in music though.
>>27455041
>16? Holy shit, is your son gonna be a bastard?
I just said we're married, and gender won't be known for a long time.
>>27455171
t. pIeb
>>27455117
Why did you grow up in solitary?
You getting/got therapy to help?
>>27455117
How's that? Care to explain?
>>27455171
>patrician taste in music
well there's yer problem right there
I've gotten dumped for not having sex with attractive girls because I'm an actual hopeless romantic.
I'm not a chad but I can bag 8/10 if I get hard cause I was a robot until sophomore year
>>27453736
I was once at half priced books and i came over a book of mormon closed the book and put it back on the shelf again
Never came back
>>27454990
Like 95% of people have oral herpes even if it never shows any symptoms.
Genital herpes is weirded though.
>>27455145
I'm socially stunted so I've tried relationships but they've never worked out. I just live alone with dogs now.
A kid wanted to fight and started swinging and kept hitting me in the face as hard as he could. I just stood there and looked at him and said, "is that it bitch?"
He went away
>>27455212
But are you qt and do you play vidya?
>>27455152
She kinda pressures me to but I think it's because she's genuinely worried for my well being and stuff so she's not like a bitch about it and I make virtually no attempt to do so. So basically it's all good.
>>27455183
what are you saying dude
>>27453775
If you're from western europe or latin american I believe you
>>27455208
i have the same virus from cold sores(hsv-1) in both places
i dont have ksv-2, which is the one people think of when they hear genital herpes
>>27455171
>bass
>good music
Back to r/hiphopheads
>>27455221
Had the same with some adult barfighter degenerate piece of shit.
Was drunk of my ass and told him to punch harder if he has to start that shit but then my friend dragged me away. Pretty glad that he did desu.
>>27455237
I'm saying you don't have patrician taste in musicpleb fuck
>>27455226
I don't play video games or watch anime. I think I'm alright looking, but I have a weak chin.
>>27455251
the fuck? i barely even listen to hip hop
>>27455264
how do you know, little bitch?
>>27455271
What do you do for fun anon?
>>27455271
post pics pls desu famicom senpai
Once in a great while my heart will speed up and I will go completely paralyzed and lose consciousness. Ears ringing, vomiting, loss of vision, etc. It happens so fast only a few times a year so, I can't catch it on data. But it has caused me to end up at the ER and everyone thinks I'm just over exaggerating anxiety. I know what anxiety feels like. This is like the worst flu ever happening in minutes. Then back to normal.
>>27455271
>don't play vidya or watch anime
What the fuck do you do in your free time?!
>>27455279
Because only plebs say they're patricians
True patricians don't feel the need to brag for attention
>>27455301
This honestly sounds kinda fun
>>27453898
The russian federation has a president you dumb fake ass nigga
>>27455159
You sound like a 21st century Ronnie Kray
>>27455356
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prime_Minister_of_Russia
fuk u
>>27455337
im just a self-aware patrician, thats all
>>27454021
Dude are you my cousin
I remember you meeting with mom and dad that one time
>>27455375
>implying you're actually the prime minister of russia
pics or gtfo
>>27455347
It's not unless you like attention. Plus I thought I was dying each time and got so pissed off when I didn't, knowing I'll probably have to go through it all over again.
>>27455334
>>27455288
I read a lot, and I like to go to museums or parks. I really like animals so I go to shelters or farms pretty often. I watch tv/movies but I'm bad at paying attention to them.
>>27455293
This is me like, 4 years ago?
I can suck my own dick
>>27455447
c-contact femanon/anon
>>27455418
>The russian federation has a president you dumb fake ass nigga
I'm not. You were implying because it has a president it dosent have a Prime Minister
>>27453736
I'm a girl.
original comment desu senpai
>>27455375
>The use of the term "Prime Minister" is strictly informal and is never used by the Russian Constitution, Federal Laws and other laws.
Fuk you
>>27455471
proofs now femanon
timestamp
>>27455464
No stamp chill Robro
>>27455472
lol you're an idiot
bloxbloxbloxbloxbloxblox
I am Helmet-Chan
>>27455447
ur cute senpai
so whats the deal? do you not have a vagina or what?
I literally know what's inside pic related.
>>27454333
What's he like in private? There's just something about him that makes me think he's the fun outgoing type who would love to tell a dirty joke at Christmas dinner.
>>27455401
You sound like a tremendous fucking fag
>>27455720
What's literally in there
My Dad was in a famous band in the 80s with one really big hit
>>27455648
Thanks, anon. I have one, but a doctor said it's a lot shallower than what a biological female's is.
>>27455464
>>27455648
this thing hasnt shown timestamp and tits yet, so stop replying to it you morons
I was injected with rubbing alcohol when I was in a psychological ward
It hurt and made me sick
>>27455723
someone get this hothead outta here
getting triggered over having pleb music taste kek
In one thread, I got trips three time and quads once. Not a scriptfag.
>>27455720
Bill Nye is a pretentious cuck
me and another boy used to kiss each others dicks when we were like 7
I'm probably the greatest person you'll ever meet when it comes to:
-growing weed
-making gumbo
-playing Gundam Wing : Endless Duel
>>27454333
were you sad about his marriage to Blair Tindall and how she tried to poison his plants in his garden after they broke up? Bitches be crazy, senpai.
>>27455752
So you can't insert things into it to the same degree?
What about your clit? This is all very fascinating
>>27453801
I got a...handjob? around that age. No idea what was going on. No way you got off or really took it in?
>>27453874
I don't know if I knew what sex was at that age but I sure remember I used to hump my pillows because it felt good there since I was like 5.
I knew it was wrong and did it secretly
Kinda expected ~1/2 the replies to be sexual
I am one of the hottest taggers in sacramento. tagging as in "graffiti" hot as in the cops want me.
>inb4 worthless fag
all my stuff looks pretty
>>27455976
Post pictures if you have any
I like good grafiti art
>>27455976
post some dank artsubhuman nigger
>>27455976
do u train bomb?
>>27453736
I never masturbated. And I'm almost a wizard.
>>27456105
how
why
its bad for you
im one of the top chess players in my country
>tfw nothing unbelievable to share
fuck this boring life
>>27455876
My fun fact for this thread: I'm related to Blair Tindall who married/divorced/stalked Bill Nye.
I'm cut and orgasms feel good to me and my dickhead is really sensitive (can be painful in shorts sometimes)
>>27454292
>>27454358
hey, I remember you from a while ago
hope you're doing alright
I have dirty talk with my teacher and I think I am going to fuck her soon.
I've been betrothed to this girl since we were babies. She's sort of cute but kind of chubby. I don't have to legally marry here but there's a lot of pressure from both our families.
>>27456236
Fuck off normifag
>>27456105
Are You religious?
If not masturbate at least.
>>27456266
She is the first woman who pays me attention, I am nos trying to defend me, just saying, she is 31
>>27456330
GET OUT NORMON
WE WANT MOMMY GFS HERE CUNT
>>27454168
>My half Japanese girlfriend is asleep on my lap right now. She's tired because we had sex twice (I finished twice, she probably finished more) earlier in the evening after I took her on an expensive dinner date to a nice French restaurant. 100% truth.
Where did you meet her?
>>27456377
Go and get one dude, yisss
I'm a neo nazi that hates homosexuals that used to be a liberal and made out with a dude once
>>27456457
Anon that's hardly unbelievable with the /pol/ spam this board gets
>>27453775
Is this your pretend wife you've been with since she was like 12 and you don't find attractive any more because she's too old?
>>27456457
Want to share dick pics and meet up to beat up gay people at a gay bar?
>>27456457
hey I'm a "neonazi" that was molested and raped when I was a kid
>>27453770
I don't believe you anon
Fdfjkntubfdf
I was a model as a child and starred in a small tv film. One of those films that they play on certain channels.
I missed school to be an extra in that movie. Spent all day on the set. After seeing the movie, I didn't even see any of the scenes I was in.
At the time I had an agent and everything. They even signed me up for a commercial once, but during the "interview" process or whatever it is, the part where you "play" family so they can see how you act in front of camera or what not, my shyness took over. I haven't been called since.
I think back on my life, on things that could have been, where I would be now if I hadn't held myself back.
Would things be better?
I just would like to peek into the universe where I chose those different lives.
Is it really better?
In this life I'm in love with someone who will never be with me.
>>27454358
Do you like women?
i'm a femanon
originallo
>>27456508
>pretend
You think whatever you want, Mr. Reddit.
>>27455447
Serious question friendo and I mean no offense. Do identify as male or female and what is your sexuality? I'm not gonna lie if you're serious about having CAIS (which I've heard about before). I'd love to talk to you.
>>27456684
Lying whore
uwuqjqj :D
I have a full ride scholarship
My ancestor was the founder of Syzran, a big Russian city and they were all 1%s. They got killed by commie bastards.
>tfw got a bj at age 5 without knowing what it was
>>27454193
Same here lmao. It was with my male cousin when I was so fucking drunk I only remember bits of it.
I'm kind of indifferent about it because I have no doubt that I'm straight
I'm an xc champion
I got asked out by a fuerdai
I'm a girl
>>27457136
>I'm a girl
BULLSHIT
>>27456457
So basically you're 14
>>27457136
What's xcAlso pls go rich normie housewife
I have the biggest news story of the century and once the AP schedules me for a meeting to break it, I will be on my way to becoming a multi millionaire.
Cant wait for my big media day
I'm a alcholic
>>27453736
I have never masturbated
>>27457090
I wasn't drunk. Also, I am really into traps, which is fucked up.
I unironically think tumblr is a great site
>>27457759
You've obviously never been on tumblr, even die-hard tumblrinas think "Tumblr is so shit" is the greatest meme ever and believe in in fully.
>>27453813
One of my friends ran his Reddit board and he said that shatner is a bit stuck up and wouldn't talk to him about anything after the initial setup
>>27454004
I did that till I was 13
It I was bullied in school and it just felt normal doing it
They divorced since they couldn't do anything and it made my life a living hell since then
I was forced to move around houses with my mom and the scariest moment of my life was when I woke up, walked out and saw a bald fat guy in my kitchen.
I learned later that it was the guy my mom brought mom from the bar.
A few years later and now they are married with a son who is now my half brother.
All together, I've lived in around 8 different houses and I'm not even twenty yet
>>27457810
I'm on tumblr right now
So much good shit
Never see any social justice content, not that I really care.
>>27457810
userbase =/= site
(not op)
Ive been writing music and releasing it
My dad married a lady with the last name Favre.
I asked her jokingly if she had any relationship to Bret Favre and she said yes. He's her second cousin. She only met him once though. Years ago at a family reunion.
>>27454661
Can I have sex with you? I'm also biologically male. You can be my bro with a vagina.
I was getting changed after rememberance day parade a day with Cadets. I was in scar park and the queen drove past and looked out the window horrified as I had my knob out.
>>27454292
I would legit smash the fuck out of your asshole, not even lying right now.
I want trap cock
I was in a professional production of a Sondheim show at age 9
>>27454292
are you cute? Any pics? I was never in the threads, so not sure if you've posted before
>>27454367
Said outloud "that's a really good story, I enjoy that story," thought you should know.
>>27455744
I think i've seen these pics before. isn't it some kind of negro hideout / druglab?
My dick is over 7 inches long.
I have been NEET for over half a decade and am a high school dropout.
Have had interest in girls since grade 1 but despite that I am still a KV at 22.
I once jerked off 19 times in 1 day.
Wildest stories here lads.
