Can anyone on /r9k/ teach me to meditate?
I've seen people talk about how its helpful on here for years and I decided to finally try it out for myself, only problem is I don't know how.
I know it's probably not complicated, but I also know it can't just be "oh sit cross legged and just shout OOOOOOHHHHHHHMMMMMMMMMMM"
>sit still for 20 minutes
>close your eyes
>don't talk
>don't think
>don't move a muscle
>>27442422
>don't think
How am I supposed to do that?
I tend to have a short attention span so I don't know how I'm supposed to go that long doing nothing without my mind wandering or getting bored and thinking of something
>>27442452
You train the ability over time
Focus on breathing, heartbeat, contact points, sensations, shit like that
People on 4chan recommended me android app called headspace. So far so good. Give it a try! It will teach how to get into meditation.
>>27442452
Don't use extra energy if you find yourself thinking. Just return to the stillness (or the object of your choosing) again and again and again. Eventually the thoughts will simply happen, you won't be attached to them. Then, eventually, they will stop altogether.
>>27442452
dont think about shit going on in your life or around you, you're supposed to be clearing your head and refreshing your "spirit"
just still still and breath normally with your eyes closed for 20 minutes
dont do that umm shit because its stupid and you'll eventually stop natrually after 2 minutes anyway
also if you really want results, do some yoga instead
>>27442536
Thanks anon!
Can I ask what you mean by contact points? Do you mean like, your body touching the ground/other parts of your body or something while you're sitting?
>>27442542
I'll be sure to look it up, thanks anon!
>>27442659
Will that affect you outside of meditation at all? I mean, I get the whole point is to attain peace/relaxation but I'd still like the thoughts going on when I'm not meditating. Or is it just like something you can turn on and off? Like, you can just decide when to make your mind clear completely and stop filtering new thoughts in and when to open the floodgates back up
Not OP but pls clarify how you "Stop thinking"
>>27442725
I've tried yoga before, it was kind of weird and didn't really do anything
Granted it was a highschool class and nobody cared/paid attention and we just did "close enough" to the shape so the teacher would think we were doing it
>>27442452
>don't think
This is wrong. It's okay to have thoughts while you meditate, don't dwell on them, but don't push them away. Let them be thoughts.
>>27443437
So just let them float around but don't actively pay them any mind?
>>27442770
>>27442725
commento oregano desu desu
>>27442770
>>27443495
Read the thread senpai, its literally less than 15 posts
I like to think of pic related. I'll keep the image in my head and imagine the lungs filling up when I breath in and then the lungs emptying when I fill out. If I start to get distracted I'll start saying "In" and "Out" softly so my entire mind is focused on my breathing.
>>27443546
Forgot my pic
FUCK THE ROBOT REEEE
Skip to p.109
http://zbohy.zatma.org/common/downloads/SeventhWorldOfChanBuddhism.pdf
>>27442422
Wrong. Cutting off sensory and thoughts is fucking dumb. Meditation is about accepting your place as a mind and body together instead of being an observer in the brain.
Buddhist here
The best thing you can do is to get proper sitting posture (at an attentive state but not so it's I comfortable) and focus on your slow breathing.
Close your eyes and starting at the top of your head relax every muscle and move down your body until you reach your toes. Keep your mouth closed as well and breathe softly in no particular rhythm.
If your mind starts to wander just go back to your breathing and acknowledge that that's what it feels like to not be in the present moment. It's difficult, but start slowly (5-10 minutes a day).
Look up a meditation timer online so you're not opening up your eyes to check the time.
If you have any question hmu yo
Quick guys! How do I relax no matter what the circumstances?
Forcefully change your experience; numb all thoughts, run away from problems, and act like I'm holy.
How long will this take to achieve Nirvana?
Maybe not even this lifetime - my routine is that effective!
So most of the times i breathe thru only 1 nostril. Would this affect meditation in any way, or it doesnt matter?
>>27444163
Nope not at all. Just try and not think about it
Did you really not google this shit?
You would be better off reading a tutorial online or going to a class in your city/town then trying to get random anons on r9k to explain it to you.
Shit, there are even better boards you could have asked, like /x/.
Whatever, have a relevant jpg.
>>27444065
>How do I relax no matter what the circumstances?
Practice controlling your emotions and breath.
It takes loads of practice. Even then you still feel those emotions, it is just that you are mindful of them, understand them, and can control how you react to those feels.
>>27444558
My whole post was a joke. You don't get anywhere with all of that control. Why anybody thinks relaxation would come about through suppression is beyond me.
sorry to shatter your illusions, OP, but here's the deal with TM
the concept of transcendental meditiation derives from a buddhist practice where they believe that the root cause of all evil is desire
that's it, desire - and they use meditation to divest themselves from desire, completely embracing the paradox that their desire to rid themselves from desire is what is fuelling their efforts to gain enlightenment
it's the typical logical incoherence of eastern spirituality
now with that underlying foundation being understood we can look at the current model of TM, which started with a bunch of hippies who had gone off to study such spirituality in the 60s came back from India and started extolling the virtues of TM to spiritually vacuous yanks - marketing it as a way to become more 'centred' and tuned in to the universe maaaaaaan; teaching folks to 'visualise' the reality they wanted to acheive, and if they did it enough, that reality would 'actualise'
so nowadays we have this idea that meditating will help one find the answers from within themselves, with such folks as Oprah Winfrey and other such notably profound spiritual masters selling selling thousands upon thousands of self-help books to the spiritually dead, which is like charging drowning men to have buckets of water poured on their heads
and the reason i say that those folks who buy into this bilge are drowning, is because there is nothing in eastern mysticism or within oneself that can fulfill a human being; and in seeking answers from within, the TM acolyte is digging into a self-reverential cavern that has nothing of light or illumination; because man is dark rebel against that which would truly feed and sustain him: his Creator
of course you probably don't want to hear that right now, since you are a rebel against Christ and want to choose your own spiritual path
but you'll learn - and when you do, you will have to choose whether to turn to the light or die
>>27445053
You're the first to bring up Transcendental Meditation (TM) in this thread. That's one specific group, though many of the techniques are common to other types of meditation as well. Furthermore, you display a very shallow and flawed understanding of Eastern practices; it's clear you're just repeating what others have told you and haven't done any of your own research. But forget about that, instead why don't you look into some of the history of Christian meditation? You might be surprised at what you discover.
rolling last 2 digits for pushups
Meditation isn't enough. You have to do Pranayama, Yoga and an obscene amount of mantras if you ever want to better your life.
>>27445719
lol Is this a joke?
Egos BTFO
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bsyplaii9p4
>>27445808
There is no such thing as an ego. Why are these guys always bald?
>>27445727
>lol Is this a joke?
No. Life without these things is a joke.
>>27443479
Let them be like little bubbles floating idly in your mind an soon they will simply drift away.
>>27445829
>there is no such thing as an ego
What exactly do you think the ego is?
>>27445506
it's pretty clear you have done absolutely no research into me and have a very shallow and flawed understanding of the greatest tripfag evah so i'll forgive your condescension this time and inform you that on my own spiritual journey i spent quite some enegery on eastern practices of meditation; exploring the root philosophies and the different branches now advocated in the west, and am more than capable of contrasting them with the different branches of christian mysticism from the greek orthodox schools of such folk as Seraphim Rose to the more Biblical approaches as mentioned in Genesis, but i won't go into too much more detail than that since if you haven't been made of aware of my learninz and edumacashums by simply citing those sources, then you are obviously content to remain in wilfull ignorance and it would be a waste of my time trying to convince you otherwise
tl;drno u
>>27445855
fuck off you raging autist
>>27445833
Why would you repeat mantras if you believed whatever you were saying? Never mind the idea you have to do a bunch of things to get to some better place is flawed.
>>27445843
Some separate thing that people attribute certain beliefs and thoughts to - then you try and kill it, which is just you fighting yourself. It's all just you.
Read this, OP. It's how I developed a lot of my meditation technique.
http://www.amazon.com/The-Method-No-Method-Practice-Illumination/dp/1590305752
>>27445885
Matthew 5:11-13cheers man - bless you too
>>27445855
>calls himself christian
>attempts to sound smart
?
You don't even know what your religion is.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X_xZcD4veGc&index=8&list=PLFfM65xLnO-GGdbO5yYuQvaKOhG6j1Ih7
>>27445911
>It's all just you.
Yes, the ego is the self. The self however is an illusion but with practice (meditation or realization of certain truths) you can dissolve this illusion and enhance your awareness from all the way from a 10 such as what you're at now to 10 million etc etc
The more you increase your awareness the more mastery over yourself and your life you will attain. Those who suffer are neurotic and it's way because of the 'self'. If there's no 'you' to suffer then how can you suffer? It's an illusion born out of lack of awareness.
>>27445911
>Why would you repeat mantras
Because mantras work. for example, if you vibrate Agni into your heart several dozen times, you might die.
>>27445995
i wasn't attempting to sound smart - i was responding in the exact same tone as the guy who was being condescending
if you thought i was being a retard it was cos...i was just pretending
>>27446045
If mantras worked, you could've chanted "I'm enlightened" 1000 times and you could've dropped all this garbage.
>>27446106
You don't know what mantras are, so stfu. Go vibrate Agni into your heart. Don't chant, vibrate. Don't be lazy.
>>27445855
Then why go straight into a rote speech about the horrors of TM, when nobody else had even brought it up? Besides, if OP is embarking upon a spiritual journey, as you say you have done, he has to start somewhere. There really are no shortcuts.
>>27446258
>There really are no shortcuts.
that's true, but there are cul-de-sacs and dead ends, and the numerous forms of meditation deriving first from eastern dualism and now diverging from western TM are exactly that - life killers
and as for my intial post being 'rote', imma take that as a compliment since i pulled that out my butt in a couple of minutes; drawing from my vast well of experience in such things
... my butt being quite HUEG
>>27444470
I prefer talking to people than looking at google, but I do suppose there are better boards
>>27444590
I did not say it was productive, and in the long run the stress will catch up.
But it is possible to force relaxation in times of extreme stress. Even temperately useful in some situations.
Joke went over my head obviously though. My bad and end rant.
To all the anons itt:
Is it okay to have music playing while meditating or do I need to/is it recommended to just do it in silence?
>>27445053
I was wanting to meditate to help calm down and be less anxious/worrysome, I wasn't really looking for the spirituality, enlightenment, peace, bhuddism or anything like that
I mean, I'm even a pretty over-ambitious person (arguably to an unhealthy level) to be perfectly honest, so it'd take a lot to rid me of desire
Hmmm there is alot less people trying to bash meditation on /r9k/ then on /x/
Interesting. Why do you think this it?
>>27446527
I have done both and it don't really matter much as long as you don't become dependent on music or compleat silence to meditate.
Sometime I use soft background music to drown out distracting noises when I am having a lot of trouble focusing (btw meditation helps a lot with adhd IF you are able to stick with it)
Other times it is quiet
And still other times I am able to focus even when a lot of stuff is going on and making noise.
You don't always have control of your environment, but that should not stop you from taking control of your mind.
>>27446681
Different kind of trolls inhabit different places.
Plus they have seen these kind of questions a million times and probably see it as someone being a lazy noob who deserves to be fucked with til they learn to lurk, google/read books, or piss off.
>sit down
>clear your mind
>???
>prophet
>>27445911
Ego is actually just a psychological term. The ego is the psychological component of the personality that is represented by our conscious decision-making process.
>>27446853
But the hate that goes on in these threads is normally towards buddhism itself rather than the OP or his question
>>27447207
Til the "anti-Budda" shows up to fill up the thread with block text of half crazed rambling about how bad meditation is till he is the only one left in the thread hours later, basically ranting to himself.
Hi Christfag. How you doing? Why are you still here? You've been posting here for as long as I remember. And I've been here since 2010.
I suck black cock as a form of meditation
it just makes me more anxious
whenever i try it im aware of the beating in my head
i suck at photoshop
>>27447606
Yes you do
Anon someone's made a better version of that edit already, it's not even original
>>27445937
>he quotes the bible, to make himself feel self-righteous saint while going to a sick degenerate place like r9k. (see no evil , hear no evil)
hypocrites, even Jesus warned against such people.
>>27442395
>>27442422
>>27442452
The whole "don't move just sit" is one of the worst forms of meditation. At the very least bad for beginners, especially for people who already sit around all day.
Shaolin monks practice kung fu and chi going as a form of meditation, Zen monks practice walking, floor-cleaning, and rock gardening as forms of meditation, Yogis practice - you guessed it - Yoga as a form of meditation.
Even just going on a bike ride or a run or practicing boxing drills on a bag also count as forms of meditation. Anything that clears your mind and has you focus on your breathing.
>>27447851
did you actually read the "Quote"
>>27447885
huuuuyyyaa shingyaaa kuuyaaaaaa nnniahaaaaa dragon fist use teh force ryuukuu
>>27447885
Nothing clears my mind
I'm just constantly paranoid/anxious about things and with exercise I just sort of zone out to the music I have on or something
I've done boxing before but the entire experience was just me hating myself for being shit at it
>>27447913
yes, but i'm not him.
do you even admit my argument is true?
>>27447962
I mean, I think christfag is a bad example of his religion/an arrogant prick and all
But he literally didn't even quote the bible, he just said the name of a random passage and followed it up with something obviously not from the bible as a joke
>>27447956
Don't listen to music actually, that's too much of a distraction that floods back memories and thoughts and goes against the process of clearing your head. Listen instead to the rhythm of your body like your feet hitting the ground or your fists hitting the punching bag as well as your breathing.
For boxing or hitting a bag, don't worry about trying to reach the skillset of someone else, just focus on simple drills like a jab cross hook, repeat until exhausted.
>>27447932
wat
