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I finally broke up with my manipulative bitch of a girlfriend, and I did it today for dramatic effect. I put up with her for a few more months than was necessary, but I wanted to be certain that I wasn't imagining this.

Of course I'm going to greentext this shit for you

>At GF's house with her family, eating a nice Easter lunch. (Parents are very religious, even more so than me)
>I act perfectly innocent while toying with her, asking her questions like:
>Do you think Jesus forgave Judas? and similar shit just to set her on edge
>After nearly everyone has finished eating, I tap my plastic cup with a fork while standing
>"Everyone, you've all made me feel so welcome into your family, and no matter what happens, I will never forget that."
>I produced a small box from my coat sleeve, walked over to my girlfriend, and got on one knee
>I could hear probably about half of the people gasp, many phones were taken out for impromptu pictures/videos (quick thinkers, some of them)
>Look up into my girlfriends face
>"Rebecca, I know what you did."
>Open up the box
>It's empty.
>"I know that you cheated on me with Jacob and Chadric (the irony is not lost on me), and I saw the pictures you sent to Tony. You are a soulless harpy and I hope you rot in Hell."
>Get up and leave, smiling at her family members as I walk out
>See her dad holding his head in his hands and her mother laughing into her hands (she's fucking crazy too, probably where her bitch daughter got it from)
>Drive home basically giggling the entire way because I had forgotten that Tony was there too
>My cellphone has blown up for the past hour, and I haven't answered a single text or voicemail. Not one.
>Feels good man

My only regret is that I didn't have the foresight to call over one of my chaps and have him record the entire thing. It probably would have gone viral.

So, robots, how has your Easter Sunday gone?

Pic unrelated btw