Is emotional damage real or are we just weak willed?
Why do some experience it in full force while others shrug it off?
Do the lack of physical manifestations make it truly fake?
Give me your thoughts anons
Bump
Jcdskoottt11776:/$3$$
>>27387305
you bump i bump we bump
>>27387188
>Is emotional damage real or are we just weak willed?
http://www.theleafchronicle.com/story/news/local/fort-campbell/2016/03/24/man-accused-killing-family-suffered-ptsd/82207078/
>>27387359
bump for you how you bump
>>27387388
Not sure how this is relevant, the man suffered from emotional damage but that doesn't prove the damage was real or that he was strong willed. Perhaps he was just weak and worse has happened to others and they got over it.
>>27387188
>Is emotional damage real or are we just weak willed?
Why does one negate the other? It seems more like you're questioning fault rather than trying to determine whether emotional damage is real, a premise I'd think is pretty inarguable to anyone who's lived out in the world.
Is it because there's different levels of impact? Well, I'd say that a muscle-bound MMA fighter will take a punch better than a grandma with osteoporosis, but I don't think that would prove that the damaging effect of a punch isn't real.
Blame is something that's shifted back and forth according to the level of energy and empathy between opposing parties, but it doesn't change anything about reality.
>>27387188
http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2010/06/29/emotional-trauma-in-the-womb/
Emotional damage probably starts from the womb.
>>27387474
Then by this it is most certainly the receiving party's fault for any damage suffered, because they are weak. I was considering this to be the correct answer, but I'm no psychologist
>>27387475
Seems like much of my own was during elementary and middle school years, these are the events that come to mind when i dwell on the pain i feel
>>27387530
Well, I mean to say that emotional damage can start from the womb. Of course you can have some traumatic event later on in life, but it in no way is a sign of weakness.
Similar to parental errors, if you know what caused your issues you can begin to work to overcome them.
>>27387436
you're speaking gibberish
Emotional damage is real. I know firsthand. I lost my mom very early, had a very traumatic and unstable upbringing, was beaten, was neglected, was threatened with all kinds of disfigurement and torture, ultimately ran away from home, all sorts of fun shit. Shit, I'm pretty sure my stepmom has actually tried to murder me twice. As a result, I get flashbacks to the abuse, and I'm sure plenty of my other issues could be traced back to it.
Triggers are real, too. It pisses me off when I see some tumblrite get "triggered" because they saw something benign on TV or in a movie. I have an actual trigger, and that's child abuse. Hit a kid in front of me, and there's a good chance that I'll flash back and fly into a murderous rage. Same goes for slapping me. I pity the first person who thinks they can do that shit to me. The thing is, though, I don't fucking talk about it IRL or ask people to censor their media for my sake, and I have the real thing (PTSD, that is). These people do, and they don't even have real triggers.
I don't think it's because I'm weak-willed. At the risk of sounding conceited and full of myself, I'm one of the strongest people I know. I ALWAYS ultimately get what I want. I endured more genuine trauma as a kid than many people do in decades as an adult, and I'm still functional (excelling, even) and noble at heart. I can do the truly hard things to do. I have cheer and compassion for others even when I feel like shit myself. I endured months and years of constant emotional turmoil while juggling tons of adult responsibilities as a minor. Had 8k in the bank by the time I was 17, and basically raised myself. I always endure. Doesn't change the fact that I'm hurt and damaged by it.
And I don't "shrug it off." The better thing to do is to observe it and let it pass.
And there are definitely physical manifestations. Stress kills. I didn't get daily tachycardia and headaches from all that crap because it was good for me.
The more you know.
>>27387583
Allow me to give an example.
Persons A and B suffer emotional trauma in childhood, e.g. bullying.
A is harmed by this and it affects him late into his life.
B appears unphased and ignores/pushes past the event and it doesn't affect him
First, is the damage real?
If no, is A simply spineless?
If yes, is B stronger than A?
>>27387590
>I know firsthand.
As do I, my question is are we inherently weak? Are we too lazy to get past these events? Is someone who suffered similarly but came out on top with no stress stronger?
>>27387188
>Is emotional damage real or are we just weak willed?
Emotional damage is real. As in real physical damage. It causes all manner of well known symptoms like weight gain, tiredness, irritable bowel syndrome, joint and muscle pain, and it can even make you stupider.
We have an instinctual response to turn away from emotionally distressing things. We should listen to our instincts. PTSD is real.
>>27387669
>First, is the damage real?
Yes
>If yes, is B stronger than A?
Perhaps, but this scenario is unrealistic. It can never occur since no two individuals are the same.
>>27387696
Laziness also can cause these things. Could it be that the emotional "damage" is simply a scapegoat for being lazy?
>>27387711
I never stated they were the same, something, be it their will, development, dna, or cosmic luck forced them to have different outcomes for the same interaction, not that they are inherently the same person.
I think it depends on your own reaction to emotional stimuli, and how you internalize it. I personally think everyone is a big pussy for getting so emotional over xyz things, but nothing really bothers me too much. People brood over past events and torture themselves enough about it to cause a physiological response. Not me though
>>27387669
I don't think there's an answer to a series of questions like that. To begin with, I don't think there's any way to determine that somebody suffered similarly to anybody else. People take things differently. Secondly, "stronger" isn't the only factor. Yes, scar tissue is "stronger" than normal flesh, and the cells your lungs produce after constant exposure to smoke are "stronger" than the ones with cilia, but they're not really healthier or better than their non-damaged counterparts. A healthy hand would suffer more in a sense from being burned than a scarred one, but that doesn't make the scarred hand stronger. Thirdly, I don't think getting past these events is a matter of effort or laziness, and I don't think that everybody who seems fine externally is truly healthy. Lastly, I think assigning qualities of better, worse, and morality to these things is pointless and ultimately always impossible to substantiate. The real question is whether you can function and keep going, and whether you can do so without letting your heart become toxic.
>>27387768
So is it that you are inherently stronger, or that you have never truly suffered any damage?
>>27387798
Is it possible to quantify the steps necessary to "function and keep going"?
My heart is not filled with anger, simply sadness, and there are some who do not understand, and say to "let it go". I don't understand how to do this.
>>27387188
Its real... you feel eerything you know and care for be ripped apart inside and out. You ever feel anything like it before. It shocks you how much it hurts. You always think yure not the type to suffer mental problems but then it has you believing its real.
You walk down the street and try to stammer off completely breaking down, but you cant. Theres razor blades cutting around in your mind and your soul is being crushed so you run into an alleyway and break down in the mid day.
Your head always hurts for days, to the point where you will take anything to make it go away.
You feel absolutely completely lost and devoid. Your brain feels like its fring in real time. Your heart long ago felt dead and youre just glad its dead and you feel hollow in your chest because your brain and your body are in constant pain. But every now and then your heart will come back just to throw in another layer of pain for fun
>>27387768
>Not me though
That's because you're a fucking autist without functioning emotions.
Reptiles don't feel.
>>27387801
Oh no, I've been through a lot of what people would normally be traumatised by. Got beat up a lot in school, abusive family, sexual abuse, etc. I guess it just never really got to me. I'm a happy functioning adult without medication, no "triggers", and a decent circle of friends.
>>27387765
Emotional damage and laziness have no beginning or end with each other. I'm sensing from your phrasing you made this thread to make your point in favor of people being weak-willed/lazy rather than honestly asking for the answer to the question. For this reason, I'm out.
>>27387839
>Is it possible to quantify the steps necessary to "function and keep going"?
I dunno, but I do think you can measure whether you're doing it to some extent. For instance, let's say you want to be an artist or a doctor. If the damage actually impedes you from accomplishing that, then you're not really functioning. Or let's say that the only way you can cope is by spiraling into an alcoholic wreck that ruins your life. That's clearly not functional.
>My heart is not filled with anger, simply sadness, and there are some who do not understand, and say to "let it go". I don't understand how to do this.
Don't dwell on it deliberately, but don't force it from your mind or suppress it, either. It's like a craving. You can deal with it by observing the feelings and thoughts you have and just letting them pass.
And sadness is fine. As cliche as this may be, it's how you know you're alive. If you've ever been clinically depressed, you know that it isn't sadness. It's a grey, foggy numbness that makes everything in the world look, sound, smell, feel, and taste grey and lifeless and empty. It makes you not want to live, but not want to die either. It's the loss of a spark deeper and more vital than happiness, one you didn't know you had until you lost it, and one that can keep you going even when all happiness is gone. When you get out of that, sadness is often the first thing that greets you, and it feels fucking sweet by comparison.
You're not supposed to be happy all the time. You're not even supposed to be happy most of the time. Society tells us otherwise, and we consider ourselves sick and medicate ourselves to treat normal, good feelings like sadness. Sadness is a normal and healthy response to a lot of what life throws at you, and it doesn't make you weak.
>>27387765
>Laziness also can cause these things. Could it be that the emotional "damage" is simply a scapegoat for being lazy?
No, before being emotionally damage i was highly productive and highly self motivated
After it, it just continued and i became non functioning. The pain was unbearable and paralyzing, physicallly my body couldnt really move around without being in massive pain, it was more psychological pain than anything. I just wanted to stay in bed and watch tv to distract my mind as much as possible. I WISH WISH WISH WISHED i could have just not be in pain and function normal and be functioning again just focus on what i liked doing. It wasnt even only the work stuff that i liked doing that was affected, its was the fun things too that had nothing to do with being lazy
>>27387696
>, and it can even make you stupider.
can you tell me about this
>>27387963
It's demonstrated to lower IQ. If you consider G factor a measure of smartness/stupidity, then yes, emotional damage can actually make you stupider.
>>27387875
Autists have feelings bruh, they just focus too much on little details and keep repeating the same patterns over and over.
>>27388004
>Autists have feelings bruh
Don't let that well rehearsed roleplay fool you. Autists feel emotion in the same way a spider feels "pain" when losing a leg: mild confusion. Those screaming fits they fly into are the only way their brain understands how to communicate things they have yet to successfully memorised and rehearsed by watching other people.
They are barely human.
>>27387875
Literal autist here. We have feelings. We experience love, happiness, sadness, elation, grief, anger, frustration, fear, anxiety, guilt, shame, pride, nostalgia, and all the rest the same as you do.
We even experience compassion and empathy, despite what some people think. The inability to read body language does make it difficult to tell how somebody is feeling. Not understanding all the social bullshit that goes on makes it difficult, too. It feels like everybody else has ESP and I don't. That doesn't mean that we don't care. If I know somebody is hurting, we can still feel for them, and we can still feel joyous for somebody if we know they're joyous. It's just that we don't see it in your eyes or the way you move. There's a difference between not resonating with the emotions of others and having trouble figuring out how they think and feel based on normal cues.
>>27387188
My brother, my grandmother (who was more of a parent), died when I was around 10 and most my family were already gone before my birth. My father sexually abused me and those were my earliest memories. My mother let me play computer games for hours starting at 5. She would yell at me all the time even for little shit like not writing thank-you cards. Shrieking. I got plastic surgery for deep cuts into tendons.
Now when people yell at me I fucking break down, it's pathetic.
I don't think even the 'strongest willed' could shrug that off at all.
As for physical manifestations, I do have scars all along my arm from many years ago that make me feel like I have to cover up, but that's not the biggest deal, but maybe that's evidence that psychological damage is not fake.
Sorry this has been more of a blogpost
>>27388109
Blog post or not, I do agree with this:
>I don't think even the 'strongest willed' could shrug that off at all.
>>27388109
I shrugged off shit way worse than this, you just didn't develop the right mechanisms for dealing with it.
>>27388056
>well rehearsed roleplay
To my knowledge, that's not an exclusively autistic thing. Normal social dynamics appear to involve a lot of well-rehearsed roleplay and "subtlety" that could be seen as not being genuine.
>Autists feel emotion
Could've ended the sentence right there.
>>27388257
>could've ended the sentence right there
And he didn't, do you know why? BEECAUSE HE'S FUCKING AUTISTIC, BIRD BRAIN
>>27388309
>BEECAUSE HE'S FUCKING AUTISTIC, BIRD BRAIN
He's clearly not, otherwise he would be well-aware of a simple fact: Autistic people aren't soulless monsters, and they understand neurotypical people thousands of times better than neurotypical people understand autistic ones.
>>27388109
To elaborate, when I was six my mother threw me into the ocean because she didnt want to deal with me when she was all coked up. From that moment on it just got worse and worse, she wouldn't stock the house with groceries if I misbehaved. I was also sexually abused, and my mom and dad/stepdad yelled at me pretty much daily the whole time I was growing up. I pretty much learned to cope with it and have no real problems today. Not sure exactly how, I should, but I don't.
Emotions are automatic behavioral reactions to stimuli that higher cognitive functions dont have direct control over. Emotional damage makes your reaction to something too strong or lacking. Emotions are not good or bad because of what they feel like, but because of how they make you behave.
Willpower as a term is bit misleading because its more about being prepared than actually being in control of the situations at hand. When emotional takeover happens all planning is bypassed and its just simple reacting. If you are properly fucked emotionally this can lead to endless loop of negative behavior.
When dealing with emotions you shouldnt focus on how they feel like but on what causes them and what follows from them.
>>27388354
Don't you get brain fog, Or not feel totally immersed in reality? Friends? I made friends when I was younger but got moved around a lot and it felt pointless to make connections so I didn't really develop
>>27388424
Not really, but I think everyone likes to disassociate from reality now and again. Reality fucking sucks 90% of the time. I don't really have many friends, but I just recently moved. The size of your social circle isn't who you are though. This isn't the movies where everyone has a BFF that they go on adventures with. Most people are shitty and not worth the time and effort a relationship requires.
>>27388554
I don't think reality is supposed to fucking suck 90% of the time
You say you're shrugging it off fine, but I don't think you really have
>>27388698
It does, though, and for most people. How much time does your average American spend trying to distract themselves from whatever is their day to day life? news/tv/movies/video games/books/music/drugs. Our society is built from the bottom up on escapism, at least since the 21st century really kicked off.
Do you enjoy spending 8-12 hours a day at work? Most people don't. That's 50% of your life sucking ass right there, sleep and daily maintenance like hygiene/chores take up time too. So we spend most of our lives doing shit we don't want to do as a majority. That is life sucking, quantitatively.
