Robots, I slapped a girl's ass. Don't know if I will survive the week.
Also social retard general.
>guy from uni drags you to party
>know maybe three people there
>my feet hurt, I wanna go home etc
>need to expand my coal supply line in Factorio
>nothing to do but drink
>feel kinda buzzed, hang out in kitchen
>talk to some guys about whatever
>this girl from my one class is also buzzed, recognizes me
>she joins the talk
>I give up my chair to go piss
>come back, she took the chair, refuses to get up
>can't tell if this is supposed to be cute or flirty or whatever
>when suddenly
>autism.exe
>jacktorrance.bat
>grab her arm, tell her to get up
>slap her five across the ass with gusto
>dis MAH chair
>she looks at me half-mad half-crying
>immediately regret it but can't break character now
>tell her it can't be that bad what with all that buffering she got
>what the fuck am i saying
>her brain is still stuck between yelling and crying
>the other guys in the kitchen are faggots like me so nobody does anything
>try to transition into humor
>i mean what is the deal, with girls taking all our chairs?
>god is dead
Will the Gestapo kick my teeth in? I don't think she has a bf or anything but unless I drop all of my classes immediately we'll run into each other again
I didn't sleep all night
>>27327508
You're fine, no one will remember or care if they were drunk.
This is more retardation, but.
>still live with parents
>mom says something about not shitting on the toilet, blahblah
>Notlistening.png
>night falls, go and take a shit
>awyis
>big bombs dropping
>realize while wiping that i shouldn't be shitting here
>what should i do?
>idea.png
>get on my knees and start to dig out my shit nuggets from the toilet and wrap them in toilet paper
>was going to drag them outside and throw them away
>mom walks in on me digging shit out of the toilet
>blankly stares while i drop spaghetti and shit
>afterwards tells me she meant it'd just be uncomfortable for me to sit on the seat
>nevernoticedanything.png
>now mom looks at me funny when i go and take a shit
>>27327547
What the fuck were you thinking? I don't understand.
>>27327563
I didn't want to try and flush because I thought the toilet was broken. So I wanted to throw the shit out before mom found out.
You're fine, OP. You'll just never be invited to a party ever again.
Which is good. More time for Factorio.
>>27327547
I mean, it's the kind of thing that could happen to anyone, except a non retard would just go grab a few nylon bags, dog shit style, and grab the shit and then just throw it in the nearby dumpster. It's an honest mistake, a shitty one but an honest one a forgetful person can make. Not like your ass slapping shenanigans which I don't even understand because why would you slap her ass after she got up?
>>27327508
You actually did good.
It's so fucking common for a girl to steal your seat, like they're a fucking princess.
I just parked my unwashed asscheeks on her lap when she refused to fuck off.
>>27327538
>>27327616
You guys sound like you slap ass every day
>>27327508
>Will the Gestapo kick my teeth in?
More like all the lurking femanons are furiously rubbing their clit to that story.
This is basically erotica
>>27327508
Who cares? You can always say that you were to drunk to think if she confronts you (which she wont)
>>27327763
>if she confronts you (which she wont)
Why won't she?
>>27327508
OP, I did something like this once. I had a crush on a very conservative shy girl and I approached her at a party and said a ton of lewd things to her. (I have no recollection of what, but I recall her friend coming up to us and asking me "are you hitting on Anna?", and Anna looking at me with an what-do-I-do-here look, and the friend saying "just say no!" in an exasperated voice, at which point Anna lit up and said no and wandered off).
I found her a few days later and asked if I'd said stuff to her the other night that made her feel uncomfortable. She said yes, so I apologized, and she said it was OK and shook hands.
>>27327508
dude literally calm your tits, we all make mistakes. Just make sure you don't follow up with more sperg in the future.
If you've slapped someone's ass and she wasn't okay with it, wholeheartedly apologize and try to make her see it wasn't your intention to hurt her, just that you were playing and dial it back some, Romeo wannabe. That's not how you get it done, but don't be an idiot about it. Get up, learn from your mistakes, and become a better person out of slapping someone's ass at the wrong time. Learn your boundaries, learn your social context, learn how to apologize and even when you have deal with rejection.
