>Female standup comedian walks on stage
>"So...I'm on my period at the moment."
>*audience laughs*
>"That's right! BLOOD came out of my fucking VAGINA!"
>*audience erupts in thunderous applause and hysterical laughter*
>>27324260
It's a shame, because there are some really good female comedians out there that never have real success because only the meme comedians get attention.
Fuck Amy Schumer.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lNKZ9ycIdlY
DUDE SHOES LMAO
>>27324260
link or didn't happen.
never mind, 2/10 for the story.
>>27324260
>Female comedian waddles on stage
>"So I fucked this guy the other day..."
>Audience loses control of their bowels in raucous hilarity
>"And we was like....so bad at eating pussy"
>Audience is experiencing multiple heart attacks
>"And my boyfriend called me during sex...how awkward, right?"
>Audience has lost consciousness
DUDE I HAVE A VAGINA LMAO
DUDE I HAVE A VAGINA
DUDE I'M NERVOUS
DUDE I LIKE SEX
DUDE I GOT DRUNK AND SOMETHING UNUSUAL HAPPENED
DUDE I HATE MY WIFE
DUDE I HATE MY EX-WIFE
DUDE I SECRETLY HATE MY KIDS
Every stand-up comedian ever, regardless of gender.
>>27324316
i agree anon
t b h we need more humour thats covered in 15 layers of irony and topped off with an appropriate meme
tips madora
>FORESKINS, am I right?
*Audience laughs*
>They're GROSS!
*AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA*
>I like my men CIRCUMCISED
*WOOOOOOOOO*
https://www.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/2dxv5a/amy_schumer_on_circumcision/
>>27324330
can you imagine how many Shekels jewish doctors would lose if we stopped circumcising?
That would be like annuda shoah
>>27324297
I genuinely loled. Thanks anon I needed that
>>27324316
You dont listen to alot of stand up Anon
>>27324379
Now I really wish our history books contained an event called "The Foreskin Shoah"
inb4 Amy Schumer lurks here and will use this title for her next special
Screencap so that we can sue
>>27324316
Wild guess, you're American?
>>27324379
I don't get why people get circumcision if they are not jewish or muslim or other religious/medical reason?
>>27325729
Because American women are brainwashed and do it because they think it looks better. Fuck them. They're incapable of higher thought.
I don't think women make good stand up comedians. They're plenty funny, they make great writers, but stand up is different. Whether right or wrong, there's this hint of masculinity that comes with it and usually audiences are stupid enough to interpret it poorly when a female is doing a set. Maybe women will make better stand-up comedians in the future, but it doesn't work with current gender roles. At least, not for the masses.
>>27325743
if you're christian/atheist and are getting a circumcision not because of phimosis or some other medical shit then you're literally retarded and playing in jewish mafia's hands
>>27325729
Wasn't up to me, familia. Had mine cut at birth.
And yeah, female comedians are horrid.
>>27325765
Dude, they don't give us a choice. It's the fucking women who are to blame, no one else.
>>27325729
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gCSWbTv3hng
Kellogg had a lot to do with it.
>>27324260
>be me
>see there's a new show with a female comedian
>know this meme
>think it's just a meme
>open video suggestion
cc.com/video-clips/tkfgl6/not-safe-with-nikki-glaser-comedians-sitting-on-vibrators-getting-coffee-with-sara-schaefer
every fucking time
>>27325765
Friendly reminder that Jews required their slaves to be circumcised
t. Uncircumcised, free Canadian
>>27325765
Some guys get circumcised voluntarily as adults because they're "circumsexuals" and they get off on it.
>>27324260
>"So, I was shaving my legs today.."
>audience is tense with anticipation, some are gripping their seats to the point where their fingers bleed
>"..and my girlfriend calls me up.."
>people are flushed and straining to retain their sanity, veins pop out against their skin as they hang on to the last vestiges of their composure, molars are grinded into crumbling slabs by trembling and taut jaws
>"...saying she totally fucked our boss from work!"
>in one dire instant, the fate of the audience is compromised as their psyches shatter in such a spectacular way that the collective consciousness of humanity suffers a vast and deep scar that will be felt in the DNA of the species for years to come. Hearts burst and teeth are crushed out from mouths as the unbound laughter of the damned echoes across the earth
>>27324260
>female "comedian" walks up onto stage
>"so like my boyfriend"
>audience leans in forward holding onto chair with fingertips bleeding in anticipation
>"my boyfriend had to buy me tampons"
>audience goes wild, laughter at an all time high from this crazy occurrence
>"also my period"
>"my period happened again lmao"
>audience literally starts shitting from the lack of bowel control due to heart attack enducing laughter
>shit everywhere on seats, being smear on walls
>autists screaming final destination, no items, fox only
>male comedian walks up on the stage
>DUDE MY WIFE!!! LMAO
>DUDE WOMEN ARE CRAZY RIGHT????
>MY DICK!!!!
>>27324316
I've never really heard much of those - but the kids part. It always seems to catch out otherwise decent comedians who become fathers and suddenly think its hilarious to say how little sleep they get and punctuate every line with "i love my kids really".
>>27327557
>No male comedian ever
>>27324316
Jimmy carr is funny and he doesnt do that routine. Check him out
