Starting tomorrow, you are given a free apartment, food, and money to pay bills including internet.
The only condition is you can't go outside anymore and can't talk to anyone you know.
What do you do?
Mail-order bride.
I don't know, I still want to talk to my parents.
>>27288742
The isolation will literally drive you mad. No thanks
>>27288742
Thisdeal needs some work.
Are you kidding? This is the comfiest deal ever.
>>27288742
>what is being stuck in a prison cell
Shit, even the most third-world American prison lets their prisoners out in the yard and talk to each other
>>27289112
Let me modify it just a little bit
1. YOU CAN GO OUTSIDE BUT ONLY A FEW STEPS TO WALK AROUND
2. YOU CAN USE THE INTERNET TO TALK TO PEOPLE
>>27288742
can i still hit up my weedman
>mfw I already have that deal
The isolation is a bitch though. Suicidal thoughts creep in and I've had 3 imaginary conversations with my next door neighbour today.
>tfw your dad regrets getting you an apartment
Kek
>>27289193
No you idiot. You'd refuse just because of that?
>>27289229
You really never go outside?
i already have that deal and anyone who doesn't needs to gtfo my board and go post on normiebook or something
>>27289365
>anyone whose parents don't want to buy an apartment for their NEET son to rot in
Dumb frogposter.
Define "anyone you know".
Can I order things online, does the delivery guy count as someone I know? How do I buy food if I can't go outside?
>>27288742
Is this apartment insulated? I don't want to have to hear or smell my neighbors.
If yes, then I accept the offer.
>>27288742
I'd do this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oudgdh6tl00
>>27289479
Yes of course you can order things online including food. Delivery doesn't count. If you make friends online you can have them come at your place. But they have to be new people.
>>27289446
living in your parents basement is also acceptable, just no wagecuck norms on my board
>>27289573
Nice. Any other suggestions?
>>27289229
You're talking to people on the Internet right now.
>>27288742
i would not, i guess im not a robot
>>27288742
be content
but still idealize suicide
>>27288742
Do I have access to a powerrack, olympic platform, barbells, weight plates, and dumbells?
If so, sign me the fuck up.
>>27289616
>having a job makes you a nromie no matter what
>>27289112
I wouldn't mind prison if there was internet and I didn't have to worry about being raped.
>>27288742
I'd take it. Can I at least talk to delivery guy so I can eat?
>>27289184
I would lose my fucking my mind and kill myself.
I'm already a live-at-home free-food free-internet, and the only joy in my life is talking walks, and in the summer going on bike rides.
Plus what's the point of living in an apartment if you can't meet new people and bring them over? may as well live at your parents'
>>27289797
Yes. But they can't be very expensive. You'll get something shabby and very used. Also incomplete. You don't get to choose son. Would you still accept considering all else?
>>27289357
Its kept at a minimum. Yesterday I went out to buy some food (in bulk) and it was literally the 1st time I stepped out of my apartment in 9 days. I don't even go on my balcony. I will be going out again tomorrow because I need a 3rd HD for my toku and porn.
>tfw my legs still sore from walking to the shop yesterday
>tfw I'm not even fat
I'm going to die here.
REMINDER THAT CAN'T TALK TO ANYONE ALSO INCLUDES THE INTERNET
>>27288742
Signed
>>27289840
Yes you can have everything delivered. I already said that.
>>27289616
>implying happy neetcucks with hobbies and interests like physics, philosophy, and being a local celebrity at the piano bar are robots
>implying miserable wagebots are normies
you have it backwards, and belong on normiebook and reddit
>>27290026
>>27290111
Is this true OP?
>>27288742
how is it "free"?
>>27289857
You can bring new people over as long as you met them over the internet and they somehow agree to see you.
You can take brief walks outside but you can't go very far from the premises. You'd just do a back-and-forth walk.
No thanks.
Forcing myself to be a shutin for life isn't worth anything.
I have many things I want to do before I die that involves going outside and socializing with people.
>>27289897
I don't see anything wrong with that. Your only problem with isolation can be solved with the internet. You're just choosing not to because of insecurity.
>>27290026
THIS IS NOT TRUE. I'M OP AND YOU CAN TALK ON THE INTERNET.
DON'T BE UNREASONABLE FAGGOT.
>>27290218
>solving isolation with the internet vs human contact
>insecure
backwards
>>27290157
>"Hey anon, would you like to go to the bar/concert/beach/park/restaurant/my place?"
>"Nah, sorry I can't, I made a really shitty deal with some bullshit genie. I can go out to that mailbox though, that's my 'party' spot, lots of epic memories by that mailbox. I saw a bird one time!"
>>27289728
>>27290026
>Thinking anons on an anime board count as a real people
If the anons on here weren't warped versions of themselves I'd agree but no person here would call another person a cuck, nigger, gook, roastie etc. IRL so they don't count.
>>27290190
>Forcing myself to be a shutin for life isn't worth anything.
r9k disagrees. Also I didn't say you have to be a shutin, just talk on the internet and have people come to you.
I call some hookers and fuck them at home.
>>27290262
He said he feels isolated even though he has the internet. The only reason he can't make friends not even online is because of extreme insecurity.
Depends, how long is the deal OP? Is it indefinite? But probably yes anyway.
>>27290268
Well, you don't have to word it like that or they'll think you are insane. Just say you have a disease and can't be outside for long periods. I'm sure they'll understand, if they don't just find new friends online.
>>27290432
Yes, the deal is forever. You can change your mind at any point you want but you'll be forced to pay for the apartment and anything you've been given.
>>27290510
Can you also provide me with rope so I can hang myself? I would probably game and shitpost for a year or two, then kill myself.
>>27290564
You will not be allowed to kill yourself. If you attempt to do it, the genie will appear and bring you back to life. If you accept the deal that's what happens.
>>27290130
those "neetcucks" are a meme and do not actually exist
"miserable" wagecucks are still playing into social norms and have not actually given up on normalhood
but nice try friendo
>>27289817
>implying otherwise
being sad sometimes does not a non-normie make
I can already have all those things while still getting to socialize. No thanks.
>>27290674
>playing into social norms
Or, you know, just making ends meet so they don't starve? Maybe they can't get neetbux like you? Idiot.
>>27288742
If i could have alcohol and some benzos ya,i'll take it
Lie, do what I want. Fuck da po po. Talk to as many ppl as I can daily. Leave the house for the majority of he day.
>>27292639
You can't. As I said, a genie will appear and knock you back into your room. You can only escape if you pay for the house and everything else.
>>27288742
I have all of this and fuck Normie's wife. Best feeling ever.
>>27288742
Jump for joy since it is easily the greatest moment of my life. I'm happy forever.
>>27292741
greentext that now
>>27292764
Don't you have anyone you know that's gonna ask questions or be upset?
Not worth it at all. Complete isolation just seems awful.
>>27292789
>neet
>sitting on mom's neck
>just walked out, got drunk and found myself personal sex slave
Nothing else to add.
>>27288742
As long as I could quit, I'd take it in a second. It would be a bad deal if I couldn't escape for the rest of my life though.
>>27292863
You don't get to choose. Think again, would you really pass such an offer?
>>27288742
Can we make new friends and talk to them over the Internet?
>>27293401
Sure can.
>>27288742
Is the food delivered to me? I think I can live with it honestly. Most people annoy me anyway and I can always game.
>>27288742
do i get any income at all?
if i could buy drugs id be okay desu
>>27293410
I'd think about it a lot then. But I guess I couldn't live a whole life without travelling
lmaoooo this is my life already, nothing would change, fucking faggots on this board have no idea what a true robot's life is like
Sounds like a great idea, OP. What if I want to move out?
>>27293698
>why doesn't everyone get a free apartment like me?
>>27293994
Why aren't you doing it already then? You aren't confident you could be independent?
>>27288742
i love back cocks original comment copyright
>>27294118
I'm pretty much an independent person, but what if there comes a time where I just get absolutely bored of the place? I can't live somewhere forever all alone.
