What's your go-to story when someone asks you how you lost your virginity?
>>27202069
22 and no one's ever asked
just lie and say it's embarrassing and i dont want to talk about itim a virgin
Tell them my private life is no one's business.
>>27202069
I call them a NORMIE then have an autistic fit which turns into a full blown seizure.
>mfw it works every time
>>27202087
same t b h lad
>>27202069
Who the fuck goes around asking shit like that?
>>27202069
>What's your go-to story when someone asks you how you lost your virginity?
"I lost my virginity to a prostitute when I was an 18-year-old kissless handholdless virgin. I was seriously contemplating suicide and didn't want to die a virgin."
People don't believe me, for some reason.
>>27202087
24 and in exactly the same boat
If it's someone who doesn't know me any better I just tell them it was to a girl when I was away at university getting my bachelors. I've got lots of details available too because lots of girls took advantage of me for free tutoring.
>>27202105
That just makes them think you're a virgin and you're butthurt
The truth. It was with my girlfriend at the time. The bitch thought it was forever but she thought wrong. I'm usually the type you want your parents to meet so they play hard to get but one I fuck them for some time and it gets boring I move on.
If normies are asking its because they know your a vigin and are probably mocking you. You will probably never be asked tho
>>27202149
They can most likely tell you're a virgin from your looks
>>27202191
>It was with my girlfriend at the time.
>girlfriend
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! Get off this board normalshit!
never been asked either.
I tell people I lost it to my high school boyfriend. he killed he self. So no one will know it's not true and better then telling the truth.
Just tell the truth - I was 8 and it was with my brother.
>>27202248
>normies faces when you say this
>>27202069
I lost it to a fat scene girl in my old elementary school that we broke into during a county fair.
Straight up tell them I plan on being celibate for life, I don't care anymore.
>>27202069
>that lack of booty
trash desu
>>27202191
NORMIES LEAVE NOWWWW
REEEEEEEEEE REEEEEEE
>>27202223
>>27202405
chill brehs. peace
>>27202069
34 here, no one ever asked. since im not unattractive at all (quite attractive actually) people just assume im either one of those "sophisticated gay dudes" they see on tv or some religious dude who keeps his private life away from his work life.
truth is im a porn addicted degenerate who spent all day at work today stealing the facebook password from a qt coworker secretary and i intent to log into her facebook tonight (at midnight when i now shes wont be on) and steal every single picture and chat log i can find. (im more interested in chatlogs)
funny thing is, she was into me when she joined the company a few years ago, and grew uninterested after i spilled my spaghetti a few times (back then, i used to still try), shes been riding the office cock carousel ever since and i intent to fap to some of the pics i know she sent to chad coworkers to get them interested.
later im probably going to call a lactating hooker i meet a few weeks back. since i cant get hard with a women i just intend to nurse all night.
i don't care what people think of me, i only know im too far gone to change now and to never reveal my power level. (at least not in public, some of you guys are alright)
im a true robot, get on my level faggots.
I'm obese, so people just assume I'm a virgin
>>27202191
U gotta leave my nigga
Uhh the truth you sad fuck.
Drunken night out when I was 18
20 now and no end to my virginity in sight. I want this to be the year so fucking badly. 20 is a late bloomer but 21 is irredeemable and pathetic
>be virgin
>drinking game
>one of those 'drink if you haven't done X thing'
>every question is sexual
>people start noticing I'm not raising my hand
>have been trying to sink through the couch and back to the safety of my house for 10 straight minutes
>questions become increasingly and increasingly vanilla
>hand still hasn't gone up
>"Drink if you've had sex"
>everybody staring holes right through me
>still don't put hand up
>everybody is blown away
>ask if I'm saving myself for marriage or something
>ask if I just haven't 'found the right one'
>mfw
>>27202248
this or say that I was molested
their faces are priceless
>>27202087
20, this. Everyone assumes I already have.
>>27202069
>"I'm pure, untouched by pleasures of the flesh."
>Run away in panic clutching my copy of Hippolytus
tell them the truth, that I finally fucked my gf after 5 years and it took 6 hours straight to cum, and they never believe me, but I could tell them some generic story ripped off from a porno and they would since normies are retarded
I start convulsing and seizing on the ground, foam comes from my mouth as I shit my pants simultaneously.
Then when it's over I get up, run straight to my parent's house and into the basement or bedroom where I play dota 2 for 16 hours non stop choke myself as I masturbate and then go to sleep crying.
>>27202369
>doesn't have a humongous nigger arse
>that means she doesn't have one
You ain't mah nigga and you never will be.
Nobody asks me such personal questions. The fuck do you all live?
>say I haven't yet
>girls get giggly and flirty
>>27202069
I've never been asked how I lost it.
But when sex gets brought up, I usually say I never fucked sober and only had sex twice.
When they question me more, I say I had conservative parents, which helps cause I'm brown.
>>27202069
no one really asked me. but when it comes to talk like this I usually just do not say anything unless asked.
I mean total stranger wouldn't ask me such a thing and if he did I would not reply. why should I?
if it was friend or woman I am about to date/dating I would tell her if asked. she is either going to think it's cute or she will dump me on the spot.
but it does not really matter, my inexperience says I am virgin for me.
>>27202508
this sounds nice. even if it's lie no one will ask you that question ever again.
>>27202517
>had a gf for 5 fucking years
>took her that long to let her put your dick in her
The fuck?
>>27202492
Shit nigga. Just lie.
I know it doesn't always work though.
I'm fairly OK looking so i never get questioned if they can all see her facebook or some shit like that, luckily.
>>27202694
I'd rather be ridiculed for being a virgin than ridiculed for lying about not being a virgin desu famalam
>>27202711
>ridiculed
Stop hanging out with assholes maybe?
It's perfectly understandable that a person would lie about that.
>>27202628
we both have unironic autism and dont like being touched, only started sleeping in the same bed last month after 8 years
>>27202567
They are toying with you and teasing you. It's their way of mocking you. The equivalent would be just laughing at you until they were out of breath.
>>27202854
sounds amazing bro
> lost it to a hooker in detroit
story I tell people
> took a lot of xanax while in NYC visiting a friend in punk rock band
> black out and wake up in detroit
> decide to buy a hooker off backpages cause im tired of being a virgin
and thats the story I tell normies. they think im some type of wild child when I tell them that.
I just tell them the story of how I lost my virginity
No one has ever asked me that but if they did I'd probably say something like "I had a fling with someone on Tinder" or "I tried dating this one fat chick I knew online" if I wanted it to sound believable.
>met a slut at a house party
>went to find a room
>find an empty room
>start making out
>guy walks in
>starts playing music
>im like dude....gtfo
>hes like "its cool, i wanna watch"
>WHAT
>i continue making out
>he starts asking questions
>im like dude seriously " i got this"
>soon he hands me a condom
>im like "it looks small"
>he replies "shut up and do your thing"
>i continue to hint to gtfo, he doesnt move
>i start to get into position ;p
>suddenly he tries to join in
>I just roar at him "GTFO"
>he somehow gets angry
>then you wouldnt believe this...
>he wants his condom back
lol
>i havent open it yet
>it was a weird request
>eventually he leaves
>finally to bang the girl
>finally become a non virgin
>after though....first time was almost a threesome
>>27202223
>>27202405
>>27202465
> taking a trolling cock seriously
> taking for the b8
By accident. No really.
>meet pastors daughter
>gf her
>rubbing our bits together
No insertion. That was her rule. We had a talk about how we were both sexually frustrated virgins, and since her warm wetness felt good on my penor and the rubbing felt good on her clit, that's how we would compromise.
>usually just feel the warmth and wetness on the top of my benis
>suddenly feel something slip
>my member is instantly enveloped in what feels like a warm wet hug
>feels gud, pic related
>realize what happened
>ask if it's inside her
>she shyly says yeah and pulls away
>we sit in awkward silence
>tfw took her "virginity"
>we decide it's okay as long as we don't move
>insert my willy
>holyfuckwhatamifeeling
>best thing I'd ever felt
>progress to slow moving, work up to straight fucking
>fuck regularly until we break up several months later
She moved out of state and I went to college. I did the dirty with a couple of girls, all the while thinking virgin vag wasn't really any different. Then I found a girl who was actually a virgin and holy fuck is there a difference. That shit doesn't just slip in. I realized the pastor's daughter must have been a fucking whore. That was later confirmed when I befriended the guy who fucked her before me (be didn't take her virginity either).
I don't talk to people and even if I did I wouldn't give a shit if they knew I was a virgin.
>>27202433
pls share the best normie book pics here family, its time to give back
I tell them how it happened
>>27202508
IS THIS THE NEW AGE OF TYPE WRITING?
only been asked once by a coworker
he was a virgin too
everyone i know assumes i am not because im normie as fuck
the only one that i think really knows is my best friend but im pretty sure he is uncertain about it
>not letting them hassle you for weeks before saying you were molested and raped
>>27202492
How old are you?
just tell: well no I've never had sex
People know that there are still some people that are in your situation. I'm 21 and I openly admit that I'm a virgin if people ask. It's technically no big deal if you face it well
>>27202069
Only been asked this twice in my life. Both moments were extremely fucking embarrassing. Seriously even if I wasn't one I can still imagine myself being embarrassed. Last time I was asked I gave some pretty ridiculous bullshit story but apparently it was good enough to be believed due to me having drank and smoked a ton prior to being asked the question.
>>27202069
There was this time when I went to prison and I dropped the soap.
>>27202087
26 here, I feel like it's long overdue to happenI have no fucking idea what I would say I'd probably just sperg out and say I never actually lost it
>>27202069
Nobody has asked because I don't have any friends
It's the perfect defense
>>27202490
>tfw also running out of time
i feel you anon
>>27208279
>tfw turning 22 in a few weeks
>still kv
>>27202490
is 20 KHV redeemable?
>>27202069
During college I would confess my virginity with the purpose of getting pity sex. It didn't work.
Now I tell them it was with some girl in a highschool party.
I waited outside of her house in the cold for 2 hours in the 10th grade because she was late and then when we got to it I couldn't get hard for an hour
We fucked like rabbits when It finally started to work though
I say I'm a virgin
Not being a virgin makes you normie scum
Why would I wanna be a normie?
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>27208387
>23 in a few months
>Still kv
I actually had sex with 3 prostitutes for my first 3 times. I told them all it was a initiation from my frat every time since they all didn't believe what I was doing and I was confident from booze and I'm not even ugly. First real sex I didn't pay for was from tinder at age 22 and at 23 I have a girl I could literally fuck right now if I snapped my fingers.
>>27202069
I tell them it is a sad story, do you really want to hear it?
My Grandfather raped me when I was 6, I told my mother, she slapped me and told me keep my mouth shut, he continued until I was 12 and told my fathers parents, they went to the police, everyone got arrested, Grandma too, she would hold me down, my parents went to jail for doing nothing and taking money from my Grandfather, he was 65 when it started, he died in jail, the court put me into foster care, where my new parents molested and beat me, I told again and went to live in a "clinical group home" where I was abused by the other boys, I then remembered what my Mother said and this time I just kept my mouth closed, I have not seen or heard from any family since I was 13, I walked away from the group home when I was 17, It has been 11 years, I have never let another person touch me since, I have a lot of emotional problems, I had my colon removed and my bladder from infection I got from the rapes, I use a bag to piss and shit, I have obsessed over killing myself and others, but if I kill myself then they finally won, if I hurt others I am no better than they were, so I go to sleep hoping I will die, but I wake up and make through another day, I do not believe in g_d, but I believe in heaven because I have already been to hell
Usually they walk away and never talk to me again
>>27209323
I'm probably gonna bite the bullet and make a normiebook/tinder soon. If that doesn't work I'll fuck a hooker. I cant let this shit go on any longer, I'm tired of sleeping alone and jerking off every night.
I tell them about a """girl""" i """met""" the summer after high school
>>27209323
you didn't follow ops s2
What are you, still in fucking junior high or some shit?
Jesus, I know we're all robots here but come on...
Was 15, snuck into my girlfriend at the time's house through her window and had sex with her. Snuck back out. Her whole family was home but nobody knew I had been there. Turns out my bike was stolen while I was doing it. So I walked 2 miles then lied to my parents and said it was stolen at the K-mart nearby. Also didn't use a condom that time.
My parents took me to the police and made me report the stolen bike though so the police took me to the K-mart and I lied and said I'd been there earlier. They looked on camera. I wasn't there. Said I was just getting some ice (camera range doesn't go there) and left. They said ok and that was it.
I just tell everyone i lost it at a houseparty when i was 16
>>27209144
This board needs more people like you. I fucking hate normies, family
>>27202069
I'm a terrible liar, so I tell the truth. It always ends up in disbelief or a pseudo-intervention but I don't really care.
>>27202069
I wouldn't deny it if asked, I don't care if peoples opinion of me lowers because I'm a virgin
>>27202069
How I say I lost it
>Lost it to a girl I dated for a few months during my second year of uni
How I actually lost it
>A chubby escort
>I was 24
>I still see her occasionally
Outside of /r9k/ I've never had anyone ask how I lost my virginity. I guess hold my spaghetti well enough that people assume I lost it at an appropriate and in appropriate manner. Or normalfags know I'm a loser and are just polite enough to not press the issue.
>>27202069
Gf at sixteen. She thought it was true at the time too.
Truth is it was a hooker at a Russian bath brothel in Bangkok when I was 14. Don't remember her face kek
>>27202433
Why are you a virgin though?
>I lost my virginity alot later then others i think i was either 19 or 20 either way it was around my 20th birthday. It was just some chubby girl who was sorta into me in my calc class. She just asked me to come over one night and "study" but instead we got drunk and fucked. We fucked once again another night but then i found out she had a fiance and i decided to stop talkin to her after the semester ended and i didnt have to see her ever again.That story is completely fake and i havnt had to use it yet because everyone at my new job just assumes i have fucked a girl before. Is it believable?
>>27202069
"That's none of your business." ez pz
t. Normie non-virgin
>>27210053
This story is good because it makes normies focus on the bullshit bike part instead of the actaul fucking part.
Uhm y-yeah when I was in high s-school
I.. Uhhh went to a party.. Haha yeah I went to a party a-and this super hot model with b-big br-reasts just jump-ped on m-me
C-crazy story, r-right, haha ??
>>27210758
Too much detail it isn't believable. I'd just say a hookup nobody needs to know the girl's life story.
Most people probably assume I'm one because of my social awkwardness (I'm actually not, though :^)), so I generally don't get asked.
I've only been asked about sex once and it was in high school, some guy asked if I fucked anyone and I said no. Nothing happened.
If anyone asks these days I'll say the same thing, everyone is a stranger to me so their opinions are nothing. I stopped thinking of sex as a possibility after I passed the 14 year old horny level.
>>27202191
GET OUT GET OUT GET OUT FUCKING NORMIE
>>27202191
turn your fucking trip off
>what was your first date like anon
>I never went on a date
>what
>im a loser
yeah thats what I said, I was drunk at the time
Nobody asks me about sex so....
>>27202069
Despite the fact that I have actually lost my virginity, I still don't use that story because it's too cringey.
>>27202069
"I'm a christian, I don't do that stuff sir... I'm saving myself for marriage C:"
I put my penis into a consenting vagina and then I suddenly was not a virgin.
Oh her name? Rustina Shackleford. No that's a real name...
>>27209913
This would be gold if it wasn't even true
>>27205816
This is a very complicated fabrication. Just say something more simple
>>27202069
I used to do gay shit with some other kid when I was like 14. It was mostly experimentation that started when we were like 12 that eventually led up to us giving eachother handjobs/oral on occasion. We tried fucking once but couldn't penetrate That was well before we knew about shit like foreplay and lubrication. I haven't hung out with him since I was like 16.
Anyway, I just say that I lost my virginity to another dude, but am mostly straight.
>>27202069
I lost mine to my fiance when we were like 16.
We had sex for like 4 hours.
Then she hit me in the face for lying to her about me being her first.
Then whenever I tell anyone that, they always think im just making it up.
Ive had sex thousands of times just people automatically think im a loser I guess.
Girls like my dick I guess even if they hate my personality or whatever.
Literally no one irl ask.
I am not close enough to anyone where such a question would be appropriate.
My uncle raped me when I was fourteen.
>>27205816
The interior life of that pastor's daughter must be pretty interesting, because there's really no reason for her to maintain that no-insertion barrier. Even if she was going to pretend to be a virgin, why not just get the banging on?
Makes it seem like she had some kind of complex fantasy life where she would have sex but would always need to convince herself that it was an accident.
>>27202069
Straigh up said i'm virgin, they paid no mind and just kept talking about prostitutes.
one of em asked me if i already fondle a girl, i shuttered as i lied but, yea, no one luaghed at me or anything.
the trick is not bein ugly and having a deep voice and angry haired face.
>ask my doctor to refer me to a psychologist
>in this country you are entitled to receive free sessions for a psych for about 9 months
>refers me to a female psych, she's probably in her late 30's or early 40's
>pour my heart out to her, explain my backstory about how I dropped out of high school due to social anxiety and depression and how my family is extremely dysfunctional. (like, actually dysfunctional. not typical teenage angst about "omg i hate my family so muchhh"
>she just sits there and nods
>asks me if i'm a virgin
>tell her with a straight face that I lost it at a friends party at sixteen and we were both drunk
>can see her slightly smirking
>asks me how that felt
>tell her it wasn't a big deal
In retrospect she was probably trying to pin my anxiety and depression on sexual frustration or something. Fucking women. You go see a psych to confide in them because you need help and sex is the first thing they attack you for.
>"I was molested when I was 9"
The conversation usually ends soon after.
>>27202248
>>27202508
I always tell them I was molested aswell. The fucking looks on their faces.
>>27202069
"im a virgin you degenerate"
say it with enough charisma and they either laugh (in a good way) and dont ask any more questions, or they respect you.
3/10
made her cum a few times
accidentally put it in her ass
dont know that she's awful at sex till my next GF
>>27212286
>they respect you.
>for being virgin/non-degenerate
>normies
>>27202069
I've only been asked once and I told him "I put my cock in a vagina" then told him to grow up.
>>27202132
you'd be surprised. get anyone who has positive social relations their entire life and they will say whatever they please without much thought.
>>27212453
it gets less common as you get a little older
past about 25 nobody is ever gonna ask you that unless you're obese or retarded, because to them it seems totally ridiculous by that point
>>27212251
they'll assume you're joking and hate you for being insensitive to actual victims. there's no win with normalfags, unless you're one of them. it's complete hivemind mentality.
24, people just assume I'm a virgin.
I just say it's none of their business. I wouldn't talk about it even if I lost it, that's weird to me.
>>27212163
I've had two great male shrinks and one terrible fat lady. The guys were helpful, understanding and offered real life logical solutions. The lady attacked me. Told me I was wrong about everything and to blame for my own problems and literally said girls in my area are known to have up to 15 partners by the time they are 20.
I already knew I couldn't respect anything she said as soon as I saw how disgusting she was. Bad experience.
>>27212163
>>27212560
Shit mates let me tell me my story
>mom was ok, but them bacame turbo normie
>told me i was agressive and a psychopath
>said she already paid and told me to see psychologist
>went there
>surprise, she's fat
>said very little on first day, she just asks about my life, ask about frinds
>"i ain't got no friends"
>second day mention i just here because mom insist i'm a pshycho, she says i'm normal and my mom that is, se looks legit enough idc, ask about girls
>3rd day, i think "fuck it" and give it a real try
>talks a little, mention a girl
>she asks about her
>says a little
>"do you think all this frustation is because you didn't got over her?"
>"wtf is wrong with you?"
>"just asking" changes subject
>never went there agin, told mother to fuck herself
jews say woman are supposed to understand feelings better than men
Woman can't do anything right
i fucking hate fat woman so much
I just said I've never had sex the one time this happened to me back when I had a job. There were three other people there, my friend didn't say anything and a female co-worker said "Really?" in genuine amazement (I'd like to think it was a compliment but she was actually just a slut who probably couldn't comprehend someone being a virgin. The girl who said it jokingly asked if she could take my virginity and I think I just said "I would". I probably wouldn't in reality, I just meant it as a way of saying she was a good looking person. She seemed to take it well and the whole conversation ended.
>>27202133
They don't want to believe
>>27202369
You disgusting sack of shit
What do you want? Some nicki mingey tier plastic roastie?
>>27212673
Make sure you see psychiatrist next time. Those are the guys that prescribe the pills.
I need to mention that you should never ever have a female doctor to help you for mental health. The loneliness is not the sort of thing they understand.
>>27202433
How did you >stealing the facebook password ?
>>27202069
People that know me know I'm weird, so I can't tell them I had a serious gf. I've said I've "dated" a fat girl because I was desperate and I had awkward sex with because I wasn't attracted to her. We dated for 6 months and we called it quits. That's the only girl I have been with. But it's all a lie
>>27210133
What's the truth?
1234throwthebitchesoutthedoor
>>27212944
>Make sure you see psychiatrist next time. Those are the guys that prescribe the pills.
>wanting jews in your head
>>27210214
>hooker at a Russian bath brothel in Bangkok when I was 14
Nice childhood desu - Was your mum dead and your father an alcoholic with money to blow?
>>27202069
Got raped
>>27212420
normies/chads can respect you for who you are as long as you're not a limp-wristed faggot
you have to look out for the failed normies, those guys are full of venom.
>>27213055
>robot
>not a limp-wristed faggot
Why are failed normies evil?
>>27213060
you need to achieve ascetic roboticism
failed-normies cannot comprehend this, and lash out in rage against those whom they perceive as not trying as hard to fit in with normies and chads as they are, in the hopes that it will bolster their social status. it's an aberrant form of virtue-signaling, and it doesn't work. They're basically beta orbiters except they orbit chads.
>>27212673
>>says a little
>>"do you think all this frustation is because you didn't got over her?"
>>"wtf is wrong with you?"
God I wish I could say this to my counsellor. She's a such a dumb bint. Every time I'm getting into the flow of talking about something and it's starting to add up in my mind and is genuinely therapeutic, she'll try and link it back to her own significance in my life. Like she'll pull some really abstract things - I was talking about my dying internet gf and she said 'Maybe you bring this up because you feel you are scared to lose me, the other woman in your life.' I tell her that honest truth about that not being the case in a respectful way but sometimes I feel she may just need a fucking slap round the chops with a horse penis.
>>27213100
>in a respectful way
why the fuck would you do that? b urself, b bitter
I lost my virginity on Valentines day.
>>27212673
It's a meme. Women absolutely cannot empathize. They only ever can give you care and physical solace but that's about it.
>>27213100
Therapists and counsellors are really the exact same things as whores. A prostitute will be a girlfriend for hire, while a therapist will pretend to be your friend. For money.
>>27213121
I'm not bitter. Okay maybe in this case I'm bitter but I don't want to hurt her and besides that I don't want to give her ammo so she can later thrum off thinking about how she totally psychoanalysed me.
>>27213206
>I don't want to hurt her and besides that I don't want to give her ammo so she can later thrum off thinking about how she totally psychoanalysed me.
You're a beta not a omega, you don't fucking belong in here
I lie
I tell them that I lost it at 14 to a 16 year old. When in reality, I lost it at 12 to an 8 year old girl. The funny thing is, she came on to me and me not knowing any better, went along with the whole thing and it felt fucking amazing at 12 years old. I don't think people IRL would like it so much if I told them how I really lost it.
I tell them the truth. I was forced to penetrate.
>>27210133
This right here. Everyone is always like "It will happen one day", and if a girls there they ask her to end it.
Only been asked once.
>Be me 20yo
>Sitting on the bus friday night
>Landwhale gets on and sits down next to me
>Starts talking to me for some reason
>Awkward as fuck
>Try to answer as politely as possible
>Suddenly she leans in and whispers
>"Hey, are you a virgin?"
>No idea how to handle this
>Who the fuck asks that to a stranger they just met?
>Sperg out and avoid the question
>She continues talking to my spergy ass for a while
>tfw she finally gets off
20 in The navy got invited to watch movies white husband was on duty at the ship.3 minutes in the movie she was sucking me.5 minutes in the movie we were in their bed . She finished sucking and started riding like a good cow girl.
>>27213346
she wanted your dick, dummy
>>27202069
"I did it with my first girlfriend and it was magical. We drank a bottle of wine on the grass by the lake, and made mad, passionate love until dawn"
>tfw actual first was a fat bitch twice my age at a coke party
>>27202069
It was a new year's party at my house, my gf said she wanted to sleep so i took her to my room and it just happened
Does it sound believable?
>>27213397
how old you where?
post /ss/
>>27212673
>jews say
kek
>>27213390
Would you fuck an ugly landwhale?
>>27213100
>Maybe you bring this up because you feel you are scared to lose me, the other woman in your life
That's creepy af man, what the fuck is wrong with your councellor?
>>27213413
maybe, maybe would let her cleam my balls and anus, but prob wouldn't let her touch my dick, she doesn't deserve, so she should make me cum by kissing my asshole and balls
had some girl ask me if i was virgin and she refused to date me because i was a virgin.
>>27213503
Was that around *current year* ?
My current gf thinks I've had 5 partners before her
Its got pretty elaborate all their details, one even physically abused me, they've all got back stories and details
Yeah none of them exist and I was a virgin beforehand. I should tell her at some point but it's been 5 years now
A girl once came to my house for some reason. I think she wanted her dog to meet my dog. In reality, she left after about 15 mins, but I tell people I fucked her.
She moved away shortly afterwards, so she wasn't there to deny it. I think it's a good time to pick because I was 16 and that's normal age to lose your virginity I think.
>>27213503
>>27213525
This makes me reeee so hard.
>Women don't want guys with low numbers
>Try to raise your number
>"Sorry, your number isn't high enough"
Guess you really can't be honest at 2016.
>>27213598
>Guess you really can't be honest at 2016.
>being honest with normies
>ever
>>27213525
Gee, I wonder why niggers get aids so often.
>>27213556
You did the right thing anon.
If she ever found out, you would suddenly become way less attractive in her eyes.
The last part of pic related is so true that it hurts.
>>27213598
its true fellow robot
>>27209323
I'm gonna be 24 familia
>>27202069
I tell them how i got spitroasted by trannies, because thats how i lost it
I thought itd make for good memes but i only feel regret
>>27202069
I haven't been asked this question since high school, when it was still sort of ok to admit that you were a virgin. I started lying about having kissed a girl starting around 16 years old, though
>>27212486
not really
I usually pretend I'm uncomfortable and probably dodge the subject at first, they think I'm some looser and push the question even more.
Drop the bomb on them and they will be shocked
Besides, if you're not a good pretender at this point you might as well give up
I am almost 29 and no one has ever asked me this.
>>27213876
It's probably because you never 'showed'
the ones that asked me said that even though I can 'hide it well' I, sometimes pass this virgin vibe and they start wondering if I'm really not virgin
Some fat pig asked me my number about five months ago and I told her I'd never had sex. She said she could tell it was either 0 or 1 and went on to say that it was really unusual for someone to still be a virgin at 24 like I didn't already know that shit
I obviously radiate virginity. This in turn means that I can never score, because women hate virgins, leaving me a virgin.
>I'm thinking about it.
>>27202069
I'm a wizard and I don't think there was more than 5 people who asked me the question. I told them I was a virgin.
>mfw every single of them asked me if I'm a pedo
>mfw one was a police officer
>mfw I was tempted to say I only like 2Dlolis
>>27202854
just like amy and sheldon from the bug bang ferry lol XD
I tell people different things, that way if my friends or anyone speak about me, they'll all have conflicting answers and can only speculate and will never know.
I'm a virgin by the way although no one believes I am. Any time I tell someone I'm a virgin they always say 'No you're fucking not, no way don't believe you.'
Damn I'm good looking. A sperg but a might fine looking one.
>>27213902
>virgin vibe
This is stupid af.
It really posts my pepes when people claim that they can tell if someone is a virgin from the way they act.
Most girls insist that they possess this superpower and it triggers me every time.
>>27214188
kek I don't like it either but shit
how can they tell?
>'Are you gay?'
>answer 'no'
>'then you must be a virgin or something'
>>27213902
You mean I didn't act in anyway like a person who is a virgin? If so then I guess that is good. I tend to keep certain things to myself, and people don't want to mess with me anyway since they don't know what I would even do.
Almost a year until wizardhood.
Though I think I radiate it when I do become interested in a girl since they shoot me down pretty fast. At least I have only asked two girls over the last two to three years now.
>>27202069
Tell them that I'm still a virgin. I'm not interested in any meaningless casual sex/relationships. Women nowadays lose their virginity in a club, on a dirty floor in a toilet. It's disgusting, I don't want to take part in it or take someone else's leftovers.
>>27214215
It's probably not actually that they can tell you're a virgin, but rather that they can't possible imagine you having sex with a girl.
>>27214244
godspeed, anon
>tfw not a original comment
fugg
>>27202525
Which heroes so you play?
>>27202069
The truth
Lost it with a gf at 16, haven't had a serious relationship since so don't say I'm not a robot
>>27214800
>Lost it with a gf at 16, haven't had a serious relationship since so don't say I'm not a robot
But you're not a robot you disgusting normalfag!
>I engaged in casual sex but hey I don't do it so I'm practically a virgin just like you guys hehe, prime pussy am I right guys?
Fuck off, you're not a virgin, you were sociable/attractive enough to find a girl who wanted to spend time with you and give you her body to you.
>>27207925
>>27202125
>>27202149
>>27202510
At this age everyone except people who have known you for extended periods of time assumes you are not a virgin. Or it doesn't even cross their mind.
>>27202069
Tell them about the time I was watching that movie where the camera crew goes into the jungle filming something and get attacked and brutally ripped apart by cannibals. It was Halloween night and this girl I had been orbiting was butthurt about not getting invited to a party her friends went to was getting really antsy for some reason. My parents left us alone because they had given up on me getting laid, ever.
anyway she was a freak and I honestly think she was turned on by the gore and in the middle of the film she just threw her leg over me and straddled me. She grabbed me by the collar and started humping me. I was just sitting there trying to keep it cool but she totally took me, she unzipped my pants and shoved my cock inside her.
That's how I lost my virginity. I didn't really consent but I would have if she had asked. She was okay looking, good facial symmetry and athletic thighs but had a bad man jaw.
was at a beach house with my then-girlfriend and her family. we got drunk one night and ended up alone in the boat house on the dock. one thing lead to another, and I fucked her ass (because we didn't have a condom)
People think i am not since i've had 6 gfs, so they don't even ask.
Truth is, i an a 28 years old virgin scared of intimacy.
>>27211638
lmao thank you for that webm
>>27214215
>'Are you gay?'
This one gets me every fucking time.
Apparently my dad had similar trouble as a young man for looking a bit metro, but then I'm not a swanky, flamboyant women's hair dresser like he was. I mean, Jesus Christ do I look like that much of a sissy boy? I intentionally avoid all that lame body care regime stuff all the pumped up turbo faggots at the gym are into for exactly this kind of reason but there's no escape.
>>27212966
Damn Robbie, its easy you just install a keyboard recorder, no one regognizes
