NoPoop
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You are currently reading a thread in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001
You are currently reading a thread in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001
Is anyone else doing NoPoop, /r9k/? It's been 12 days and I can already feel the extra vitamns and nutrients absorped from the fecal matter. I
swear I have more energy and can feel the nutrients sworling into my tissues and nourishing my brain just like the TEDx talk.
I also WAY more confident with women. I've gotten a lot of comments about my posture and stern expression that have come from abstaining Im sure of it and Im going to talk to another woman today.
How goes your NoPoop journy, /r9k/?
Kek'd pretty hard, clever OP.
Currently 2 days into nopoop, how long untill I get superpowers?
I used to have bloody shits every time I shat. I would wipe and it would just be blood, and it would sometimes drip on the floor when I stood up to wipe.
Now 4 days on NoPoop and I can confirm that bloody shits have stopped occurring, mainly because I have not had a bowel movement in 4 days.
Looks like that rectal cancer is clearing right up.
>>27182800
>>27182707
KEK
I needed this thread today
2 months in over here, I can already control time somewhat
is this what /fa/ means when they talk about nopoo
I keep relapsing. Obe day I'll get to day 90 and explode shit out of my ass.
NoPoo day 87 here. Waiting until I meet the right girl. Excited to impress her, afraid I'll poo prematurely though. Any anons have experience with this?
>>27183032
fap before meeting her and you should be alright
>>27182707
Sorry brah, but that's pseudoscience. It's healthy to have frequent bowel movements. It's associated with a lower risk of colon cancer. Also, if you don't shit for too long, you'll just shit yourself.
>>27183099
I fap all the time anon, I'm talking about NoPoo
>>27183121
>this is what PooAddicts actually believe
Keep shitting until you get Rectile Dysfunction.
>>27183121
You do know that ancient monks and martial arts masters would consume their own feces to give them extra Qi, right? Fucking ignoramus. You think you know better than a fucking Shaolin monk?
I heard that if you don't poop for long enough, women will like you more, is it true?
I believe I may have suffered some internal damage from NoPoop. A few days ago (after approximately 2 and 1/2 months) I felt a sharp jolt of pain in my lower stomach/colon area and I heard an audible crack. It immediately felt like something was seeping out inside the space of my gut with no organs in it. I can sometimes hear it sloshing around. When I lay down it's like it spreads out along the inside of my back. I can tell the level inside me has risen over the past few days, too. It's getting higher. It's getting close to my lungs.
>>27183148
It's true. The poop is full of pheromones that eminate from your rectal cavity (butthole) and attract the female species.
>>27183153
Might just be your Test levels peaking, you've got a little too much testosterone in you for now so it's running amok in your system, give it a few days and it will reinfuse into your doo doo.
>>27183145
>Rectile Dysfunction
>>27183192
Are you sure? I can't walk without a lot of pain. Does having high testosterone hurt?
Day 19 into NoPoop. To be honest, more women have been approaching me. The only negative is that my breath literally smells like shit from the poo poo build-up.
>>27182707
Day 8 of nopoop checking in. I dont feel a difference except feeling sick because I need to shit and I've gained 4kg somehow but hopefully that all changes by the time I reach day 12.
>>27183243
Yeah, it's usually quite painful which is why if you watch old John Wayne movies (he has high testosterone) he often limps or waddles around. This is not only because his hardened, backed up colon is giving him a little trouble, but also because his testosterone is peaking.
I poop at least 5 times a day. ITS A PLACEBO. You fucking retards. And you get solid dreams after a while anyways, and thats not fun to clean up in the morning.
>>27182707
COPY PASTA COPY PASTA COPY PASTA OP IS NOT ORIGINAL EVEN THE IMAGE IS STOLEN REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>week three of no poop
>life slightly but clearly improved
>feel like I already erased shitting from my system
>go to sleep
>have a dream in which I'm shitting all kinds of poop
>from sausage like, to big rocks, to diarrhea
>wake up covered in feces
>pajamas and bedsheets ruined
>took hours to clean
>room still smells
>mother doesn't look at me in the eye anymore
Don't do this, guys. Don't fall for the No Poop meme.
>>27183145
>Rectile Dysfunction
Holy kek that's good
![watchmen_dr-manhattan2[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/JzEvhkb.jpg "watchmen_dr-manhattan2[1].jpg")
>>27182707
Day 180 of NoPoop here.
My skin has turned an unsightly glowing blue color and my pupils turned white
but my dick got bigger, slightly
>>27183280
Didn't he die of stomach cancer? I'm a little concerned but if there's a chance I could be even close to as manly as the Duke I'll keep at it
>>27183121
>Also, if you don't shit for too long, you'll just shit yourself.
That's fine. Your body has natural mechanisms designed to relieve your colon from the build-up of fecal matter, usually by voiding your bowels while you're asleep. It's best to just let it happen naturally, and remember that shitting the bed doesn't count as a relapse.
BTW, anyone else doing hardmode? Every night I come home and stare at the toilet for two hours.
>>27183315
He died of Hi-Test, it's a chronic illness. The issue is he got so good at NoPoop that his testosterone actually popped holes in him and he bled to death internally. The drink Hi-C is named after his condition, hence its blood red color.
Still, as long as you don't get as extreme as The Duke, you should be fine. There's a reason the movie is called True Grit.
>>27183329
nigga i've been eating and drinking all of the shit saved up in my poop jugs and diarrhea fishtank over the past 11 years of neetdom just to help increase the amount of fecal goodness coursing through my veins
I have phased out all food and water. The only thing going in this body is pure, putrid poopy and it feels great
>>27183329
Other than feeling the urge to shit more and denying yourself that right over and over are there any benefits to Hardmode?
Week 2 of NoPoop here, I've put on like 8 pounds of what I can only assume is pure lean muscle.
>>27183367
Oh, okay, thanks anon! I'm thinking about attempting to get an under the table doctor to either sew my anus shut or surgically place a permanent buttplug in there so i can no longer be tempted or have accidents. I have a really good feeling about NoPoop after talking with you. All my doubts about internal injuries were so silly. Thanks again for putting me on the right path anon
>>27183367
>There's a reason the movie is called True Grit.
Who thinks of this shit
>>27183281
>you get solid dreams after a while
i second that
>30 days into NoPoop
>proud of myself, havent even looked at the bothroom door
>go to sleep
>have dream about waifu
>she wants to bang
>yus.jpeg
>"oh anon i want you to take a fat shit on my chest, i-its my fetish y-yy-your not weirded out are you a-anon?"
>no im not bu-but im on NoPoop my life has gotten so much better i can't im sorry
>lose control of my body, i pull down my pants and bend over her
>"yes, anon let it all out!"
>trying my hardest to resist but i have no controll
>let out the biggest turd ever, it was all in one peace
>wake up
>pants are warm and squishy
>sudden realization
>tears are rolling down my eyes
>no
This is why girls can get laid so easy. They never shit.
>>27182707
I'm on day 15 of NoPoop , the body is meant to burn all, nutrition not waste it. I run myself like a fine tuned machine.
>yfw your parents sliced your ass off and you'll never poo properly
In b4 "muh cleanliness"
GUYS I'M SHITTING WHILE TYPING THIS
I'M- I'M SORRY!! i have failed the spirit of nopoop!!!!!!
anyone else on nopoop starting to seriously doubt their capacity to evaluate advice they find on the internet, or make decisions in general?
I mean, I eat the kale, I take freezing cold showers, abstain from masturbation and pooping, and work out and stuff. It all sucks so bad, and I still can't get laid.
almost a week now. hopefully tomorrow i'll shit. i even took some shitting stuff today.
>>27183153
You're full of shit.
NoPoop has no negative side effects.
I've been farting for a few hours a day, it's getting out of control. I'm starting to think it'd be better if I just sat down at the toilet and pooped. All this farting has to be just as bad for me.
>>27182707
Thank you OP i needed this 10/10
>>27183563
Try to stop sleeping as well. If that doesn't fix it, then I don't know what will.
>>27183573
>You're full of shit
Nice one family
>>27183145
Underrated post. OP's post is stolen, but this is clever.
>>27183584
At least you're not sharting. I had to drop No Poop cause I sharted in class and everyone started calling me names. I had to drop out.
