So who else here is /totally fucked/?
>live in van
>need van for off books job
>van breaks down
>I only have $82 to my name
>fugg
>Well closest place I have connections is a trailer park
>Call my friend who lives there.
>have him get some redneck fuckboy to tow my shit with his big truck.
>The minute we get past the gate of this fuckhole:
>See some fat emo teenager handcuffed to a golf cart getting taken away
>We finally get to my friend's trailer
>he is in one of the shitty $300 ones that is literally a trailer with the wheels taken off
>still have to sleep in van (whatever)
>THE NEXT DAY!!
>Wake up at 6:30 to some idiots on a golf cart
>it's the fucking dickhead supervisors
>one f them proceeds to kick my van and screams "who's fuckin van is this!?"
>uuuuugggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhh
>these two assholes harass my friend and his room mate.
>"Ok which one of you sold that fifth to(some stupid fuckin kid)?"
>walk up and grab one of these pricks
>throw him on the ground
>"hey what the fuck is this?"
>yell at him about kicking my van
>other faggot runs out
>"HEY THAT'S A SUPERVISOR LEAVE HIM ALONE"
>Tell him I don't give a fuck who he is if he kicks my van again I'm running him over in his stupid cart.
>punch the other guy in the mouth because he tried to cuff me
>my friend comes out to break everything up
>Tells me to step away
>tells the superfaggots to gtfo
>an autist is not meant for this shit
CONT
i await the finale to this story OP, keep going
Good shit so far, friendo
>>27175543
Would you just fuck off Rick?
scholid, continue
>>27175579
>>27175610
>>27175672
>later that day
>See some kids playing street hockey
>some crazy old fuck in a monster truck comes by
>"GET OUT THE WAY YOU DAMN KIDS"
>Kids give him attitude
>I get annoyed
>walk up and tell the little shits: you guys realize when people are driving you say "CAR" and clear the road right? that's how it works
>"duuur oh ok"
>that ends quikly
>LATER THAT DAY
>Meeting my friend's naighbours because what the fuck else is there to do
>They are pretty cool
>guess who roles him in their fucking Cart
>this time it's a different superfaggot
>he tells me their head superfaggot wants to talk to me
>I get there and this is his proposal:
>"We saw you defuse that situation earlier today"
>"We think we could use your asssistence supervising the park"
>Am I gonna get paid?
>"Well we feel a fair deal would be to cover the rent for the land you are living on"
>this cuck actualy thinks I'm gonna pay rent for land that's already acounted for
>I then tell him "even if I was retarded enough to fall for that I have to get money to repair my van and GTFO this fuckin shithouse so I have no time to run around dealing with these weird ass people"
>so first full day is over. I have no way of finding more money to fix my van, I have no way to leave this shit house, and the Starsky and Hutch wannabes are not friends with me
>>27175624
I NEED TO GROW MY FUCKIN DOPE BUBBLES!
>>27175742
>Day 2
>Wake up go into their trailer and see what their up to
>My friend is not there only his scrubby weeb room mate eating toast with relish
>toeachhisown.png
>He is watching the news and listening to death metal
>"Hey man what's up?"
>ask him where my friend is
>"He is out selling"
>Almost ask selling what, but knowing my friend it probably makes sense only to him
>I just sit down and wait
>a few minutes later he gets out of some random cunt's truck bed he comes up and says He knows a guy who can give me an estimate for my van
>We go all the way to the other side of the park wher there are more fenses and bigger trailers
>strangely enough these people are even crazier
>some fuck who looks like Keith Richard's mutant twin runs out of nowhere and pulls out a sword
>"You see that?"
>yeah...
>"I got that in Korea when I toured there in the 70s"
>ok cool.....
>well this only getting weirder
>>27175913
an excellent break from this site's usual garbage, please continue, trashybro
why do you white trash red neck drug addicts think you are welcome on r9k?
>>27176013
Why not? What's so bad about white trash? That they reproduce and thus, have sex?
>>27176013
Fuck off you preppy suburbanite homo
>>27175958
>We get past the devil's rejects family reunion and get to this guys trailer
>outside his house he has an old daytona near mint
>the fuck is this guy living here for?
>he knocks on the door
>out comes some deranged black dude with dreads down past his shirt
>(insane laugh) what ya want?
>Yeah hey my van is fucked and I was wondering if you could look at it.
>OkIthinkIcandothatprettyeasy
>Well good news is coming
>He then pulls off on a four wheeler with a loud ass header.leaving us to walk back
Sorry for the wait i accidentally clicked off
>>27175913
>>Almost ask selling what, but knowing my friend it probably makes sense only to him
its drugs m8
its always drugs
>>27176178
>We walk back and see the fuckboy squad yelling at the old dude with the sword
>we decide it would be easier to cut through people's lots
>I will now run throough a list of the shit I saw while doing this
>a bunch of squirrels in cages
>a grill with (who I think was) bob dylan painted on the side
>an old car with the doors replaced with fencing
>an old television that was even plugged in and working (only showed static though)
>>27176239
and no, believe me, if drugs were a possibility I would not have mentioned that but my friend has the most bizarre ways of making money and they still some how work
>>27176278
>after about 20 minutes of walking we get back
>the crazy black dude already looked at it
>tseemsyoursteeringcablecamelooseandpulledarodintotheaxlandjammedityouaregonnaneedthewholefuckerreplacedisayaboutsixhundidisayaboutsixhundid'
>that's 518 more than I have
>I need to figure this shit out
>my friend has an idea
(that I still have yet to hear)
>just in time I get a call from me mum
>she says I gots to pay my $35 share of our internet.
>so I finally manage to get a ride back to my town and give my money to my step brother
>he never fucked up in giving it to my mother before so I didn't figure
>the following day (today) I get a message from my brother saying he thinks his friend stole it.
>I go to the kids cuckerberg
>see "yo I finally got enough to get my whole gang lit who gonna be up round 11?"
>So now I'm out $35, and I have to fix my van for like 600 and I have to figure out howto get this little fucker to pay up. today is going good.
Pretty cool story OP
>>27176933
thank (with grand originality)
op i will give you money if you are near socal
seems like you have a shitty life
>>27177060
I appreciate that very much but for one I don't live near there and I wouldn't feel right accepting that.
I've been in jams before, not this bad but I'll figure it out
Sounds like a movie I'd watch.
is this dead thread?
>>27178277
not yet but I got no more stories for today, maybe more some other time.
>>27175543
I dont know if this Trailer Park Boys script or legit story.
