How can a slimy hyper-autistic NEET pseudo-hikki weeaboo dork make money without ever leaving the house? Mom and dad aren't going to pay my rent forever, and if I move back home, I'd be too afraid to hang my anime loli posters on the walls. So let's use this thread to brainstorm ways for losers to make money.
I've given a lot of thought to scamming niggers on the internet. They are dumb, and I think I could entice them with something criminal. I think I would message them on Twitter or whatever and say "yo nigga, I got this job as a bank managa. if you send me yo ATM card numba, I can double the money on it and we split the extra." But how would I get the money out? That's where it falls flat.
Send in resumes everywhere.
Shower daily and dress with a semblance of care.
Get a job interview and start working.
There, your life is fixed. It's really not that hard, lots of humans do this on a daily basis. You can do it too.
>>27092476
I don't want to go outside or talk to people face to face though.
>>27092470
Uhh, sorry but.... I think you are the dumb one....
>>27092606
How so? What is dumb about it?
This the weeaboo NEET thread?
>>27092476
I have trouble waking up in the morning. What if I oversleep and get fired?
>>27092395
Write erotic fiction and self-publish on kindle. It's possible to make sex figures doing this if you're willing to pander to roasties and sexually frustrated middle-aged women in general.
>>27092799
>*six figures
lel. Women are fucking depraved and love to throw their money at anything that gives them the tingles, though.
>>27092791
If you want it to be.
>>27092799
Sickening image, but I like the idea. What do roasties like? How extreme will Amazon let me be? Like, say, I bet that they'd like stories about some rotten old hag like themselves being anally fucked silly by her teenaged son's best friend. Can that be published to the Kindle? How young do you think I could go?
>>27092395
adsense
There's some guy in /biz/ who posted a guide to monetise reddit content via a twitter scraper. He gets 100-200 per week
i'm not gonna make it guys
>>27092893
Been looking at /biz/. Most of it looks like it's investing money in silly pump-and-dump schemes. I suppose you have to lurk some, which I'll probably end up doing.
Good idea though.
>>27092940
Money will solve all your problems. Join us in this thread and get rich beyond your wildest dreams.
>>27092892
Incest has a huge audience, but primarily from the Father/Older Brother angle. I'm sure you could build a niche fanbase out of /ss/ though. Amazon does have some regulations around incest, but with creative wording you can bypass it. I recommend find a copy of The Six Figure Erotica Author by Jade K. Scott for some good tips on that specifically.
The other high-selling bases are monsters and rape, but you can go wrong with traditional Chad Thundercock based stories pandering to basic bitch Stacieis.
>pic related, the highest selling "romance" after 50 Shades of Grey
>>27093012
*can't go wrong
Fug, I need to slow down my drinking tonight
>>27092395
I've given up at this point
I went to the doctor and I've been referred to a psych at the hospital. I'm going to get diagnosed for one of the mental problems I have and get some disability bux.
I just don't want to work.
I'm so lazy.
I can't do the 9 to 5 grind, I can't do it.
Being NEET is shameful but I can't muster the energy or the ability to do anything else.
>>27092503
That's unfortunate, because any job that doesn't involve human interaction is basically automated these days.
There are no asocial jobs.
I'll start with saying that working from home will mean working longer hours and exerting more effort than almost any "normal" job.
I translate hentai from Japanese into English. Obviously it takes times to learn another language, but you could potentially do it within a couple years and start making money. Hentai doesn't exactly have a lot of complex vocab (usually). I'm currently not making enough to support myself, but I might get there eventually (business is steadily picking up with time).
If you've noticed a theme in this thread, sex sells. Writing smut is your best bet to making money from home. Your English writing skills are more important than your understanding of Japanese in translation as well, so if you can write well enough you stand a chance.
But like I said - it takes a lot of work. My biggest limit on how much I can earn is the fact that I am a lazy sack of shit that doesn't want to do anything. I'm considering getting a normie job just so I can have set hours and be "free" once those hours are over.
>>27093012
K, here's the pitch for my new novel:
>Sandra Widecunt, poor stay-at-home mom, is neglected by her husband. Max Richcock, son and heir to the porn-star billionaire Nick Richcock, is a horny teenager. After Sandra meets Max at her son's football game, they hit it off. The intense sexual tension between the two of them erupts one night when she drives Max home, and the romantic passion that results changes both their lives forever.
Fuck, that was actually pretty hard to write. I don't know if I can do 50K words of that.
>>27093119
IKTF man.
>>27093137
I'm pretty good at programming. I just don't do well with deadlines. I panic and do literally everything I can to avoid thinking about it. When I was in college, I would find myself literally scrubbing the toilet to avoid working and having to think about the pressure of due dates.
>>27093168
What if I stole your work and translated into spanish. Would the shitskins pay? Would you be mad at me?
>>27093178
Women are stupid, but that's probably to cringey even for them.
>>27093233
>Women are stupid, but that's probably to cringey even for them.
I did my best. I'll get better with time.
>>27093233
I sell a service, so nothing to steal. They probably wouldn't pay. And hopefully I will get out of this market and then I won't care what happens in it.
>>27093168
How long did it take you to get good at Japanese?
I recently picked up the language, but I am getting demotivated just because how slowly I learn things.
And I'm scared to post questions in /a/. Just because they don't take you seriously if you have bad grammar.
I do enjoy it though and study 2 hours each day.
>>27092476
>turning himself into a slave
>life fixed
wew lad
>>27093168
What niche do you translate? Loli, rape, scat,...? Do you have any limits on what you would be willing to do?
>>27092395
What about cat fishing? I feel like that works well with the NEET lifestyle.
>>27093390
Had to google that term. There is something about exploiting lonely, desperate men that just doesn't sit right with me. I don't think I could do that.
>>27092476
>Working minimum wage.
>"fixing your life"
Pick one.
>>27092395
I'm a neet and I make my money all ebay/craiglist. Reselling through ebay is an easy way to make money as a neet. Research a market and then by and sell it. Though with craiglist its tough, especially as a neet. Never let anyone near your house and dont trust anyone you deal with. Most craiglist people seem nice but remember there are scummy niggers hiding as white, asians, or etc. I only bother with craglist with furniture and bikes. But ebay is amazing as you will never have to face someone in person and with packages you can ask your mailman about picking it up from your house. USPS is somewhat required to accept your request to take your packages if your mailing out.
You come live with me and give me succ in exchange for my precious wageslave tokens. Surely moving your lips and tongue isn't too tiring even for a slob like you.
>>27093381
I translate basically anything. The really freaky rape shit I turn down, but that rarely comes my way. If I want to turn something down, I usually just charge an insanely high fee. If they pay, then I suck it up and make $$ while scarring my soul.
>>27093370
Started learning like 8 years ago or something. Been fluent for a few years now. The "trick" for me was learning to read manga and using that as my main way to study. Find some manga you like and start reading it. Doesn't matter how shitty you are to start. Keep finding manga series you enjoy and read them. Look up words you don't know and learn them as you go. The thing to remember is that learning a language takes time, so just aim to maximize how long you spend with the language.
Oh, and talking to other people that are trying to learn generally sucks. They're either idiots or super pretentious about their method being the best one out there (or both). Find something that works for you and keep at it.
>>27093429
That's a pretty good idea too. I hadn't thought of reselling, but I did think about buying stuff on craigslist and selling it on ebay. For example, I noticed that my father is always buying old junk shit like motorcycles and only needs a few parts. What if I bought old shit too, took it apart, and sold the parts alone. Like, say, the fuel injectors or gas tank. Of course, I would have to actually learn things about how that stuff works, but what else do I have to do.
But I'll research the reselling idea first. If you don't mind me asking, about how much do you make? Do you have a lot of problems liquidating things you've bought? I don't have a whole lot of money, and I can't really afford to sit on stuff for six months before I can sell it.
>>27093504
N-no thank you.
>>27093421
>>27093380
Don't listen to these assholes. Jobs really aren't that bad. Pretty bad, but better than moving back with your parents (I assume).
>>27092476 This. Research Interview questions beforehand, and have the answers memorized. Once there, find one or two people who don't visibly flinch at your presence, and awkwardly interact with them at least once a day. You won't actually grow to like them, but soon you'll be able to order at a fast food restaurant with minimal pain!
![[DmonHiro] Sasami-san@Ganbaranai - Episode 01v2 - I'll Start Trying Tomorrow (BD, 720p) [1B3FAC01].mkv_snapshot_05.22_[2016.01.16_18.13.31].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/5WS7c6L.jpg "[DmonHiro] Sasami-san@Ganbaranai - Episode 01v2 - I'll Start Trying Tomorrow (BD, 720p) [1B3FAC01].mkv_snapshot_05.22_[2016.01.16_18.13.31].jpg")
I don't want to go outside
>>27093544
>you'll be able to order at a fast food restaurant with minimal pain!
My god, please stop. This is bullying.
>>27093581
What if there is a fire?
How about trading options? It seems a lot cheaper than stocks. I've been reading up on hedging and programming so I can try to make a bot to try on test data. My parents are pretty content to ignore me as long as I stay in my room so I can do this shit all day.
When I get rich you can come live with me and be my maid. That goes for all of you queers.
>>27093178
>Sandra Widecunt, poor stay-at-home mom, is neglected by her husband. Max Richcock, son and heir to the porn-star billionaire Nick Richcock, is a horny teenager. After Sandra meets Max at her son's football game, they hit it off. The intense sexual tension between the two of them erupts one night when she drives Max home, and the romantic passion that results changes both their lives forever.
That would probably sell, in complete honestly. Hang out in the /d/ writethread for some basic pointers on writing lewd and you're on your way!
>>27093536
Yes you are the right track, auto, pc, electronic parts are a good way to make money. Though im not to good with taking apart things so I hunt more for rare video games, consoles, and some electronics at goodwills/thirft stores and mostly online. My best market right now is chinese smartphones, buy then cheap on alibaba and resell at a higher price on ebay nd try to compete with the other vendors by offering 2 day shipping at a low cost.
>>27093714
Sounds risky. You're going to be competing with Jews who have a lot more experience than you. And also, I know from forex that trading on practice data isn't the same. It takes time for orders to be filled and there are so many fees for doing anything that what makes 500% profit on practice will lose everything in a day on real trades.
>>27093723
Really? Interesting. How long would I have to make it? Think I could get away with like 30 pages for $4.99?
Do you have experience in this area?
>>27093796
That sounds pretty good. I have an idea for you too. My mother likes to go around to garage sells and stuff a lot. A couple years ago, she picked up a really nice couch from a church fundraiser sale for $100, then looked it up and found a bunch of similar couches going for five or six hundred. That requires a bit too much interaction with people that I'm comfortable with right now, but you may find it interesting.
>>27093965
>30 pages for $4.99?
Most kindle smut goes from 5000-10000 words on average, best price seems to be $3.00, but if you're good at making covers, you could probably get away with more because bitches like nice pictures.
>>27093965
I used to love garage sale hunting when I lived in a smaller more comfy city, but now I moved to a bigger city its not the same. I agree with what you said about your mother's story except where I live now its not so great(Seattle). Its a pain in the ass to deal with old white folks who seem stuck up on their high horse and they try to overprice shit items because of all the hipsters buying the shit up. But yeah I missed the old days in the town i used to live in, my parents would give me a ride on the weekends and we would visit the towns near us and hunt for treasures.
>>27094093
17 pages? That's it? I think I can do this!
>>27094093
Maybe buy a bunch of junk on the internet and sell in to hipsters for huge profits in your own garage sales then?
>>27094158
>I think I can do this!
That's the attitude, Anon! You can sit around hating women for their degeneracy, or you can bank on it for tendies and anime figurines.
Here's a good breakdown of how one author made their way up to making $9000 a month.
http://www.kboards.com/index.php/topic,162157.0.html
Good luck, fuckboy!
>>27092395
Camwhoring. Seriously. I make $100 a month just for eating my own shit and masturbating on a webcam, something I would gladly do for free.
![11262014_hillary-clinton-2-28201[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/YSVjGmv.jpg "11262014_hillary-clinton-2-28201[1].jpg")
>>27092395
If you're skinny you can start camming as a twink/trap.
>>27094289
Thanks for the idea. I'll spend a few days looking up writing and plunge into it.
But, Amazon does allow the use of pseudonyms, right?
>>27094375
Translate it, Russaboos.
>>27094415
Let it be known thatI am not. Additionally, with mytiny, cut, retarded pedo dick, people would only want me to do degrading and sickening shit like >>27094375.
Find a sugar mommy and be a stay at home bf
>>27094657
But I don't want to be a BF to some non-cute old whore or fag!
>>27094500
>But, Amazon does allow the use of pseudonyms, right?
It certainly does, and I'd recommend it. Further, you might consider adopting either a female pen name, or an ambiguous one (ex: C.J. Thundercock) For some reason, women seem to prefer this.
>>27094829
>not wanting to be a rich business lady's househusband
>>27094829
Beggars can't be choosers, faglord.
Cute image though. Now get out there and get ready to lick some shriveled roastie cunt for her shekels.
