I'll start.
> Be me, high school
> Grade 9
> Trying to hang out with 'popular' kids but never really fitting in
> Always getting boxed out of the group but always standing behind them awkwardly
> I was that kid who never spoke but just stood behind everyone
> They come up with the word "smeagle"
> It means working your way into a friend circle via physical force
> One day I do this to try and talk to people
> One guy smeagles next to me
> "H-hey man stop smeagling!"
> Turns to me and says "Anon, I've got to let the cat out of the bag. You're the actual smeagler and no one likes you."
> He turns away and starts chatting with Stacy
> Everyone else staring at me and laughing
> Wanted to die
> Continued being left out and excluded
At least university is better, r-right?
>you didn't sock his jaw right then and there
Also, you were the butt of the joke, how you didn't realize that sooner is a mystery.
>>27075629
i always kind of suspected it
How old are you? After you're well into college or graduated no one gives a shit about high school anymore. You shouldn't still feel bad over what happened then.
>be me
>be alive
Haa
>Suicide on my mind for years
>Try a couple of times, but always pussy out in the end
>One day, actually manage to hang out with some friends
>Really, just a perfect day
>Sun is setting, everyone is laughing
>Only thought in my mind was to go home right then and kill myself, because I was finally happy and I wasn't sure I'd ever be lke that again.
>A different time
>Alone, enjoying time by myself for once
>Everything at that moment felt in total perfection and synchronized
>Such a desire to kill myself, because I thought I'd never achieve a similar total peace in life.
It's happened similarly on other occasions. At this point, any kind of heightened emotion makes me feel like killing myself.
>On some website back in 04
>Girl messages me.
>Weird type of rivalry.
>Slowly get close to her,
>She gets bf.
>They break up.
>Well, we get closer
>She visits me for a few days.
>So nice, She let my fingers into her vagina.
>I should have made her my gf.
>Fuck up
>She gets someone else.
>I get butthurt, retarded
>Fuck it up horribly, Rage at her for no good reason.
>Fuck it so bad she doesn't want to talk to me.
>"You were never the person I thought you were"
>"Stay away from me"
>Horribly depressed.
>It was all my fault.
>Should have killed myself in 07.
>Been putting it off for nearly 10 years.
>On the brink of homelessness...
Maybe sooner then later...
People used to kick me and make fun of me when I tried to stick up Some boys cut in front of me in the lunch line and I told them to get behind me and they pushed me over and kicked me in the back of my knee, noone saw or cared.
I dated nothing but losers and lost my virginity in a terrible way because I felt like I was too ugly to be loved.
I was always called fat and ugly until I was about 19 years old and realized people were mean liars.
A stray cat had kittens and I helped her give birth when I was 8. It was in the middle of winter and I went to see them in the garage and one had fallen to the floor and was mewling quietly with a blank stare on its face. Its body was stuck to the frozen cement and it died in my arms an hour later.
>be me
>get 1340 on the SAT
>dont know rank or gpa because i live in australia
>do a shitload of extra curricular shit all throughout highschool
>write some good essays
>apply for 7 american colleges
>mother constantly calls me a piece of shit and has always told me im going nowhere and im not going to get into college
>never believe it, assume ill at least get in to my safety school
>school fucks up supporting documentation, pushing me to the back of the queue
>stay confident, im a good candidate, surely
>ive dreamt of college all my life, surely ill get in
>mom: youre a failure
>i do a shitload of hard subjects and i fit all the criteria
>mom: get a job and get out of my house you piece of shit
>take it all in stride, youll be sorry etc.
>mfw its mid march and i havent been accepted to any of the 7 unis
>i only have until april 1st to get accepted anywhere
>tick tock
im actually going to kill myself
on april 1st if im not in anywhere
I don't know what came over me but I once asked a girl out. I always remember the look on her face while I'm in the shower or lying in bed trying to sleep
I'm a 26 year old virgin
>>27076504
why?
at least withdraw all the money from your account and go on a hitchhiking trip or something.
Why kill yourself? You can do whatever you want with no consequence.
>>27076587
>all the money from your account
?
i have a couple hundred dollars m8
my parents didnt save shit for me
we are poor
i will go into the wild most likely
>my pops just told me to kill myself,
> well little does he know I am going to fucking do it.
> I'll pay lip service "forgive him"
>say I am sorry
> then in the dead of night i am going to do it.
>>27076625
Anon, take her debit/credit card and paypass a few hundred bucks worth of shit, enjoy yourself with her money than leave
>>27076587
This mentality is flawed, why not? Because nobody wants to do that, that's a whole shit load of extraneous effort for nothing and if you're like me with no social skills, it won't be much of an adventure other than walking the streets of a random town wondering what the next move will be, while you're exhausted and hungry. Some people just want to die, if you feel unloved and alone, just the only thing to do is die.
Either way $300 and a broken piece of shit car isn't gonna get me very far.
>>27076473
You dated people, you don't consider yourself fat or ugly, and a pet dying is one of your worst experiences?
this is probably why we don't want women here
>>27076473
>lost my virginity
D R O P P E D
R
O
P
P
E
D
>>27075530
>Getting on 4chan
>clicking board /r9k/
>this post
>>27076649
>just waiting on them to go to bed wrist will be slit soon enough
>>27076401
Dude, I hate to rain on your (admittedly depressive) parade, but the symptoms you just listed are common in the seriously mentally ill. Please consider going to your local hospital, or at the very least consulting a psychologist, even if it's over the phone.
>>27076913
Thank you for trying to help, anon, but I'm certainly too far gone for it. On top of that I'm positive I have increasingly desperate and uncontrollable OCD.
That said, I'm the kind of person who can do my best to ignore something until it's made concrete. If I were to consult anyone now - about my manic depression or my OCD or anything else - it'd be real, and concrete, and something I have to deal with. For now I can do my best to ignore my issues and deal with them
>>27076473
>that cat one
fuck sorry anon
>>27077063
Well if you don't think my previous suggestion would impact your circumstance positively, you might contemplate the use of opiates/opioids, and I mean that seriously. It's better to be a drug addict than dead, and believe me, as I recovered drug addict I have a lot of knowledge on this shit.
>>27077175
>It's better to be a drug addict than dead, and believe me, as I recovered drug addict I have a lot of knowledge on this shit.
Growing up, my mother was a pain pill popper for about a decade and it was a constant struggle. The amount of shit she put me and my father and my siblings through was terrible. I couldn't ever bring myself to repeat her mistakes
I'm too much of a coward to kill myself anyway, so instead I'll continue to live unfulfilled. Thank you for the concern, though. I do appreciate it.
>>27076587
AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
FUCKING NORMALFAGS
>>27076504
Is this the new one out of 1600? I hope so anon...
>>27075530
>hacked on runescape
Shit sucked desu f a m
gambling away $25000
feel envious of y'all with bitch problems, money problems are much more painful
6 days ago, I farted in front of my sisters friends...
I was helping her move into a new house, and she bought us beer after we finished, I had 5 beers...
I ripped 2 loud farts when I picked up a box...
I obviously have a lot of other stories, but this was the most recent one.
Got raped in my sleep. More than once. Also had ice cream with cum in it and wasnt told until a year later. When I tried to tell people, they took his side.
Once I had to use a neighbours phone bc i didnt have one back then, the neighbour turned out being a sex offender, hed saved my lewds from online and masturbated to them with me just standing there.
>>27078639
And also my birth mom had literally 10 abortions before me. Then she gave me up.
Theres more shit things that have happened but I dont want to work myself up typing them. I dont think anyone would blame me if i killed myself.
>>27078639
If you didnt interact with normies then you wouldnt have any of this shit happen to you senpai
>>27076434
stop using screens and you will be more productive
>>27078639
But have ever farted in front of normies?
>>27078639
How (or why) did he get nudes of you?
You're starting to seem like a roasty.
>>27078766
Yeah, i've gotten pretty stealthy about it though.
>>27078749
You know, I dont know if you're trolling, but I actually believe that that might be true.
>>27078790
I don't know exactly, he didnt tell me.
>>27075530
>be, today
>be 25
>virgin
>friendless
>NEET
Just kill myself up senpai.
>created dating-site account
>girl i used to work with messaged me
>go through the usual ritual of her asking how i was, what music i liked, bullshit like that
>get tired of it
>tell her i think she's hot
>she got offended
>never talked to her again
>>27076310
Where do you think you are?
Original comment for da joos
>>27076310
Not him but Im 24 and still get upset about high school
>>27078295
yes, its the one from last year
>>27075530
>born
Wanted to kill myself ever since
>>27076504
Prove her wrong anon
