>spend the last 8 years NEET
>Farting, Shitting, Pissing at the first indication of me needing to do such things without ever having to hold them in due to being home alone
....
>starting a job 2 weeks
>deeply concerned on how I am going to cope by the fact my body is use to pissing and shitting and farting so fast once I need to
How the FUCK is this going to work? Am I allowed to just get up and go outside to fart instantly? Can I getup straight away and drop everything im doing to take a piss or shit?
How does this wage-cuck shit work? Should I just avoid eating/drinking all day until I come home?
I lift and eat multiple meals a day and need to hit a certain caloric target so this makes it much more complicated for me.
>>27027973
Just practice with a diaper desu.
People are actually forced to hold in their shit and piss?
Isn't that a crime against humanity? Did wagecucks actually have to put up with that?
>>27028341
Welcome to society, where everyone is ashamed of their bodily functions and people would rather your kidneys explode and you get hospitalised rather than risk seeing you take a piss in a back alley.
the law protects bathroom breaks. They can't stop you from taking them when you need them.
>>27028433
wow...there needs to be actual laws implemented to protect wageslaves from being stopped from performing naturally occurring bodily functions?
and people wonder why I dont want work
>>27028433
They'll find some other passive aggressive way to get you.
>>27028760
This.
I drink a lot of water and eat upwards of 4000 calories a day. (Pretty fast metabolism and I am extremely active) and I literally lost out on bonuses n shit because I got told I take too many bathroom breaks.
It's a fucking joke, can't wait until I figure out a way to make money without working for someone else.
>>27028697
No they don't.
Nobody thinks of you at all.
your body will adapt after a while.
>>27027973
Alright, man. Here's what you gotta do until you're used to it.
Eat reasonable meals. Don't gorge...in fact, you might wanna eat a little less than usual. Drink only moderate amounts.
Finally: Take half a pepto-bismol chewable before you start work. Don't worry about it plugging you up.
All it does is dry out your intestines, which keeps you from shitting so quickly. It'll make it slightly easier to maintain.
Your shits will be DISGUSTING, STINKY AND BLACK. But you should do fine.
Take advantage of any lunch breaks you have. Piss and shit, even if you don't have to.
And finally, if you can't keep it in, use the damn restroom. Obviously, if your job involves some sort of duty post you have to watch, get the other person working with you, if there is one, to keep watch while you're around. Or just ask your boss what to do if you've gotta go.
I worked at a convenience store at graveyard shift, and the boss was cool with me putting up a 'back in 5 minutes' sign and locking the door, when I had to shit, as long as he didn't recieve complaints and saw that sales were made.
>>27027973
Pissing and shitting I will get up and do even if something urgent comes up. I won't be able to concentrate if I don't. Farting is another matter entirely and trickier, depending on where you work. I have a desk job so as long as they don't smell bad I just let them off. But most of the time if you're farting, it means you need to shit.
Farting? Do it in a remote and loud part of where you work.
Pissing? Just fucking do it. They can't tell you no.
Shitting? Before work or during breaks. Your body will adapt to the schedule. I eat a lot of veggies and can shoot one out in a few seconds if need be.
The favourite tool of wagecuckery is Metamucil.
Take this every morning when you wake up. It should set you on a nice shitting schedule and it will take care of all your fiber needs, your shits will be large and wipeless.
I cucked 14 hours and 13 minutes today. I pissed three times on the clock, no farts or shits because I am skelly. I didn't eat anything until I got home, not even a tictac. The trick to minimum piss breaks is limiting fluid intake, I drank 40oz of diet mountain dew. If you stand most of the day shit stays in peripheral circulation away from kidneys, another hack to avoid the urinal, just be sure to lay down at home and read an hour or so before bed so you get the blood turned to piss before it wakes you up. Both poo and pee you eventually lose the urge after you push through long enough. My body goes when I want it to. Thanks to fiber I'm regularly every other day before shower and no wipe needed.
Lmao at butt cucks. So dependent upon their butthole the thought of a couple hours without shitting terrifies them. Neets are truly pathetic. I'd rather be a slave to Shekelstein than my asshole.
>>27029309
Jesus, cut down on those calories your metabolism is going to get worse as you age. If you have bad eating habits when that happens you will be in for a rough time.
>>27029415
Have you tried eating 4000 calories? I had a similar diet for a few months and it's hard enough even chugging milk when you wake up at 3am. Eating less often is not an option unless you have a fuck huge stomach.
>>27030039
I heard that constantly holding your poop in can drastically increase chances of colon cancer occurring.
>>27030097
4000 calories is not something any human should eat unless they're a gymNEET.
Get off your high horse and eat like a regular human being.
>>27030115
I am not going to stop my lifting goals for work....I am sorry but I am not going to turn into one of you sedentary klinefelters looking wagecucks.
>>27030093
Manlet detected
When you're not a midget the body needs more energy than a 12 year old girl of human height. Don't worry, you'll get the last laff whet he gets old and his metabolism 'slows down'.
