alright robots, the time is now. how do I start this convo?
my stats: 6ft, muscular, 8/10,
note: am looking for romantic contact, even just a practice gf.
thanks
Something witty about catching. Like a silly pun or something relating about fishing, but put it more on you.
>>27004657
does your pussy smell like the fish your holding?
>>27004688
Don't this is a test to catch people out. she'll know how shallow and bland you are.
post a pic. we need to know if you are in her league.
>>27004657
Why are you hurting that poor fishy. What did the poor little guy do to you, bitch?
>>27004730
Isn't the point of these shitty dating apps to make an impression regardless of how terrible the first message is? Just don't ever go with something bland like "hi" or whatever. That right there is shallow. Make the first message relating to either her photo or something usually they have written in the bio. Probably not with this one seeing as how trying to be romantic might backfire worse than trying to be silly.
>If I were in the position of that fish I'm sure my floppy fish dick would be at full attention for being hooked by such a beautiful temptress
>>27004759
I would post a pic but i know some ppl on r9k and i dont want them to see its me. Looks alone though, i'm probably out her league. too bad im a complete nerd who barely speaks (like gosling in "drive" except when I do finally speak, i dont sound like a little bitch)
okay i decided to go with the first real opener thats been posted
cool, she responded. now what?
>>27004911
my name is george i'm unemployed and i live with my parents
>>27004911
Tell her that two of them are true, and you'll let her guess after having a drink.
>>27004911
>mfw it actually fucking worked
>>27004911
"what about you find that out on your own [Insert a day of the week here] at [insert local coffe here] at [Insert time of the day here]"
>>27004911
I'm just trying to get my fish fetish across before we actually get started. I actually go to the grocery store to pick out fish to masturbate into. That is one lovely fish.
>>27004911
I'm a big fan of slapstick. I slap my stick everyday.
>>27004825
If you know people on r9k the it won't be a surprise you're posts g here.. You're jus asking for tinder advice. If they already know you're a faggot enough to post they won't care if you suck at tinder.
Post a pic op
>>27005159
replace actually with frequently
>>27005229
i wont post a pic but you can use my number of matches as an indication of my looks
>>27005271
how many of those 950 matches has your penis been inside of?
>>27005159
>>27005234
do this op trust me
You're funnily working your way into getting your dick into fish smelling things
>>27005271
Reply to stephanie you fucking idiot
>>27005098
>8/10
He literally mentioned fish dick and she's still interested. Pay attention to what happens next.
Still requesting help. i told her about the silent vocal chords thing, so some anons will now know who i am.
>>27005388
>trying to do this yourself after the line you were given worked
>not waiting for the next reply to be given to you
you made this mess by being impatient. dig yourself out retard.
>950 matches
>needs help
Why don't you practice on the other 949 girls? You have plenty of chances.
Because it's a fake profile.
>>27005388
Wait, that part's true? You really can't speak?
>>27005388
wow you're so shit at this top kek
Why do women always brag about being sarcastic as if it's this rare special thing?
>>27005388
Seriously, what is wrong with you?
>>27005441
because it's the lowest and only form of humour women can into, and they can't even into very well
>>27005441
Because it's the lowest form of humor and is usually caused by a negative outlook.
women are fugged
>>27005469
>>27005476
Dam son beat me to it
>>27005469
>>27005476
sarcasmception
>>27005424
yeah, hence the reason why im socially crippled.
so i mean do we want to try a strategy on a different girl? i think i fucked this one up senpai
>>27005532
post the bio you wrote for your tinder profile
>>27005532
you best find someone who knows sign language. or at least someone who will love you enough to learn it for you.
>>27005469
>>27005476
woahbhbasdnjmka blox blox blox
>>27005554
>bio
don't need one really. i just did the most generic thing and said I love the outdoors, food and travel
>roastie applications all day with those three things
>>27004657
post more shit dude this is intriguing
>>27005604
people have said that to me, but i can still hear. i just cant respond as well.
>tfw girls say I'm such a good listener
>*grunt*
>>27005271
how long have you been on tinder and what is your age group and distance
pic is a new girl who's pretty cute. i'll say whatever you guys decide, just please greentext the comment
>>27005709
i graduated college in december, live in nyc. age group is 18-27
>>27005749
>graduated in december
meaning to imply its been about 2 months or so. but of course nyc is insanely dense with people so yeah
>>27005643
its more so it's an easier way to communicate. i had no doubts that you couldn't hear, im just saying it'll be a much more easier way to converse.
Show yourself, mr. thundercock.
>>27005388
Damn dude, I thought you were just messing around with this can't speak crap. Thats fucked man.
>>27005749
>Aren't nose piercings for cows or something? Because you're far from a cow... you're gorgeous. Also, do you like memes by any chance?
>>27004657
bump bump what the fuck happened BRAH? continue!
>>27005749
>if [...] we can't be friends
>it was totally an accident
>totally not taking this seriously
>don't be [this, this, or this]
why are women such insulting cunts in their bios?
>>27006543
>not getting the Friends reference
eh whatever
>>27006577
>Friends
an hero please
>>27005749
"Remember that episode of Friends where phoebe dug up her moms corpse and took it to central perk?"
>>27005749
>how you doing?
friends reference, instant in with what she likes
>>27005073
This was pretty good
But if OP can't speak I don't get it. OP can you even like date girls or whatever?
>>27004657
not 23, and not 20 either wew lad
2 red flags
I feel like the entire relationship would be that way
>>27005749
Can I ask you guys a legitimate question?
why do girls do this? fucking why.
If you don't like X then we can't fuck
If you don't like this movie don't talk to me if you don't like country don't talk to me if you don't like being pegged in the asshole don't talk to me
>>27008151
Maybe they really like [x] I mean robots could do this too.
>make tinder
>if your not a virgin don't talk to me
>if your not a robot don't talk to me
>if your not 2d don't talk to me
See how it works
