Welcome to my clinic Anon, how do you feel today?
Post anything physical health or mental health related problems here.
I'm pretty much good.
Seeing my therapist on Tues. Been thinking about writing s behavior journal? I'll have to ask him if some of my thoughts and actions are delusional.
Not sure.
>>26817568
What happened anon? Why do you think you've been delusional?
>>26818028
Nothing happened persay. I've been seeing a therapist for some time, and he keeps asking about why I think I'm so weird. I get to my behaviors and I myself start calling them "almost delusional but I'm aware of them"
Like for example, I'm pretty much convinced I'm going to be one the greatest writers of all time. I believe that if I think about killing myself too much it will karmically cause the universe to kill me. I'm sure most everyone who sees me/speaks with me hates me. Im pretty conscious of people watching me. I have my blinds closed most of the time and try to keep to myself in public. I don't walk around women at night because I'm scared they think I'm trying to rape them or intimidate them or be an accosting asshole.
I don't know, we talk a lot about stuff and him and I are both hesitant to use any clinical "diagnosis".
I'm just wondering
i went to the doctor because i had a black scab like mark on my skin for ~1 year. i didn't really change color or size. the doctor called it a nevus. is that the correct diagnosis? i picked at it and it grew back. is it a sign of melenoma?
I think I'm gay.. how can I be cured dr
>>26818279
An injection of cum into the butthole.
>>26818186
Jesus christ dude. Are you me? Minus the rape bit, I'm 1 for 1 with those pseudodelusions or whatever.
26 yo caucasian.
About a month ago I got what looks like a birthmark on my hand. It's not growing or shrinking, does not hurt at all, I literally just looked at my hand about a month ago and it was there.
Probably not very common to get a birthmark aged 26... Any ideas?
>>26818367
dark skin may be a symptom of type II diabetes. In any case you should see a doctor instead of asking NEETs
>>26818365
That's weird AF anon. I think though I was describing some very general feels we all feel.
How is your situation right now?
I'm a collegefag in my third year. It's been...really weird.
Oh oh one more, that I'm being tracked and monitored online. Pretty much waiting for the FBI to bust down my door for saying something bad/racist or something. Like, I'm positive I'm on some lists.
>>26818393
Does that mean I can go into a coma and die if I skip a few meals?
>>26817430
My taint has been itching like non-stop for the past week am i gonna die?
>>26818367
looks weird anon. like something happened to the blood vessels in hat area. you should get it checked out.
>>26818403
Yes. Holy shit, I know that exact feel. I decked out my Firefox with anti-tracking addons and taped up my webcam for a bit because it was getting to be so bad, and yet I knew I on some intellectual level that I needn't worry so much.
I'm in my second year of college and about to withdraw for the semester due to mental health reasons. Mostly depression and a lack of motivation. Going to take the semester off to read and write, hone my craft and gather influences so to speak.
Sometimes if I'm on a plane and think about it crashing too much I worry my thinking about it will cause the event.
I think I might be schizotypal. I haven't been diagnosed with anything but GAD and depression, but the symptoms of SPD apply to me to a T, except that I'm aware of my delusions as delusions.
>>26817430
If you swallowed or snorted the insides of an old fashioned smoke detector would you give yourself lymphoma? Is it always fatal if untreated? How much does lymphoma hurt?
I'm taking sertraline.
>>26818530
>I think I'm schizotypal
Ahahha okay this is getting too fucking weird. These are my SAME thoughts. Exact fucking same, my god. Like, word for word.
I did the same. Deleted FB, taped webcam, privacy things. At one point I had a VPN too. I'm not even doing anything illegal or wrong. It's just paranoia.
I get paranoid about that stuff too Anon.
I think I read at one point the difference between typal and phrenia is (well, a lot), but that they recognize their delusions are just delusions.
Idk. I've thought about taking a year off but I know if I quit now it'll be in possible to get back in it. That and I REALLY fucking love learning
Let me ask you some questions you and I probably both know the answers to:
>Do you really like to be alone and have little need for social contact?
>How many fake emails do you have?
>How many websites with "accounts" do you use, and how much personal info do you reveal on these sites
>How many times have you lied to me in the course of this exchange to obscure your identity
>Do you have a vague fear of being doxxed
>>26818658
Excuse my garbage spelling and grammar and everything
>>26817430
I had surgery on my foot years ago and the scar has been hurting me all day today. I have a chipped filling that's been bugging the shit out of me but I'm too poor right now to afford to get it fixed. I'm also in a depressive episode from bipolar disorder that isn't fully medicated.
Other than that I'm feeling fine. My yearly lab work came back and my sugar, cholesterol, lithium and liver are all perfect. I'm taking a lot of medication and some of them can really fuck me up, but it seems like everything is okay. I just wish I had a better income so I could afford some insurance. Fuck this fucking country.
>got a headache over stressing meself over money
you need money to do basic shit.
money to get ready for a test.
money to buy food/drinks.
money to have friends.
money to even get more money.
money to get a car/house/pet/etc then spend more money to keep it.
money to keep living.
money to open a bank to save more money.
where the fuck does all this money come from? thin air?
>rushed through hs just to be on potato mode
>tfw bad at math like at gradeschool basic level at age 26
>>26818367
You had any contact with chemicals or radioactive stuff?
>>26818658
>Do you really like to be alone and have little need for social contact?
I'm alone a lot and I'm only comfortable when I'm alone, but I don't want to be alone - I want a friend group, a qt gf, the works. But on the rare occasions I'm not alone I'm so uncomfortable I want to be alone.
>How many fake emails do you have?
Like... 3, maybe 4. Though I mostly just use temporary email services whenever I need anonymity.
>>How many websites with "accounts" do you use, and how much personal info do you reveal on these sites
Just IRC now, and only a few of my closest online friends have any identifying info. I used to use a lot of forums until I got banned from them.
>How many times have you lied to me in the course of this exchange to obscure your identity
Never outright lied, but I've consciously been omitting details that could be used to identify me.
>>Do you have a vague fear of being doxxed
Yup
About two weeks ago I drank an expensive bottle of whiskey that some dude riddled with HPV left behind.
I figured in fifth grade we'd learned that you don't get STD's through shared drinks, but everyone else in my dorm was freaking the fuck out when they figured out I drank it.
Recently, my balls have been feeling...I guess burning and all the shit they were saying to me two weeks ago is getting to me. Did I just sacrifice my genitals for the sake of good whiskey? Or will I be a'ight like I thought?
>>26819285
You're probably fine, but even if you're not, it's only HPV. HPV is fucking nothing.
>>26819105
Nobody cares about doxing neckbeards. It's done if they are seriously autistic the point of it being funny, but it's usually just like looking into a mirror of a bored below average man. Nobody cares.
>>26819105
>I'm alone a lot and I'm only comfortable when I'm alone, but I don't want to be alone - I want a friend group, a qt gf, the works. But on the rare occasions I'm not alone I'm so uncomfortable I want to be alone.
Sounds about me. Minus the friends gf part. I don't even know what I want.
>Like... 3, maybe 4. Though I mostly just use temporary email services whenever I need anonymity.
Once more, close to me.
>Just IRC now, and only a few of my closest online friends have any identifying info. I used to use a lot of forums until I got banned from them.
I have some innactive accounts for stuff like Nexusmods, sadpanda, etc. I DO have a FB though, but only recently remade it ought of a desire to be "normal"
>Never outright lied, but I've consciously been omitting details that could be used to identify me.
That's expected. I've been lying quite a bit
>Yup
Me too.
I'm asking, not because I want to try and diagnose you, but I want to know just how similar we are, and more importantly, what we are.
Do we want a diagnose man? I mean, what does it mean to us to have a piece of paper that says our personalities are just weird?
The whole personality disorder scene is very highly political. There's a lot of criticism against the APA, DSM and Psychiatry as a whole. I think it'd be important if you evaluated the idea of a "diagnoses", and what it means for you. Is it an area of treatment? Does it excuse your actions? Who knows? What could be schizotypal to one psych/therapist could be anxiety to another. This is what I mean when I say it's a really political field, not very biomedical. Psychiatrists and therapists are like the agnostics of academia. They know that people have these behaviors but they have no idea why, and they know some treatment helps, but the don't know how it does (empirically speaking). It's a very infantile field.
Are you seeing a therapist? I forget if you've told me before.
>>26819085
In January I started working with fiberglass. That's about it.
Smoke 12-20 cigarettes a day.
Drink 4-8 standard drinks a week.
I was born by c-section, and developed asthma and severe allergies because of it (No history of allergies or asthma in my family). I am allergic to pretty much all foods except meat and rice, so I have to take vitamins everyday. I am an excellent singer, but my allergies act up if I walk by someone with heavy cologne, or if there is pollen, and that fucks up my singing. There is nothing worse than having your gift/potential stunted by something as uncontrollable as allergies. So frustrating.
>>26819434
Not currently, but I have and will be soon. Not for any personality disorder, but I'll be bringing that up. Like you I have a general distrust for psychiatry as a discipline - I don't think etiology is even a concern for psychiatrists - symptom management is. The medical professionals I've seen are more concerned with treating the outward manifestations of mental illness, instead of sorting out the piled up psychic knots that may give rise to it. Which IMO is a consequence of reductive materialism in the field - psychology has yielded too much to neurobiology to properly be able to address pathologies with purely psychical causes. But I'm veering off course. I don't think personality disorders are a useful abstraction - and they are just an abstraction - except to understand certain symptom clusters. So I'm not sure a 'diagnosis' would tell me anything I don't already know. But I do want my anxiety and depression treated because I know those are just holding me back from what I want to accomplish in life, and traveling, and meeting people, basically gathering experiences to eventually use in my writing.
>>26820116
I'm not sure of the best way to talk about these things with a professional without sounding like someone jonesing for a diagnosis though. I really do think you ought to see someone for your GAD and depression, because those are very treatable and common. Though I'd be wary of pill pushers. Try a therapist first, and explain that you don't really want to go on medicine immediately. You sound like you'd rather get at the root cause of your issues, and maybe, sometime down the road, medication might be an option.
>The medical professionals I've seen are more concerned with treating the outward manifestations of mental illness, instead of sorting out the piled up psychic knots that may give rise to it.
Sounds like you've had some shitty experiences with docs. I've been to four over the course of about four years and have NEVER been perscribed pills or anything. All we've done is talk about things.
This is the issue with psychology as a field tho. It calls itself scientific, but it lacks (in most cases) actual biological catalysts for the various mental disorders it has created. Nobody doubts that these people are suffering, it's just very hard to justify what psychology has become in the face of its own shittery.
We suffer because it's such a young field. What, like 30 years ago being gay was a mental illness, and now it's not? The bible of these people is called a "living" document because it ebbs and flows as needed. That's why this is so very confusing, and I'm very grateful my guy hasn't hounded me about tests. I've left that up to him. If he feels I need to have evaluations done, I'm going to let him, but I'm not pursuing.
Still though, we talked about diagnosis and what it means. I explained what I thought and he came back to me and said "It's almost like you're getting permission to feel the way you do"
Something to think about.
>>26819285
If it's good whiskey I don't he teethed it. It's only memes, you're safe.
I hate myself for every little mistake I did.,is that normal?
>>26820069
>I was born by c-section, and developed asthma and severe allergies because of it
How the fuck does that work exactly?
So in my buttcrack a bit above my butthole it's like the skin is tighter across the crack so if I were to pull my cheeks apart it pulls on that part and hurts a bit. it's also sore some times I guess.
