Ask a guy who was in the wrong place at the wrong time today and had to deliver a baby anything.
You accidentaly killed it didn't you?
>>26683849
Just greentext it faggot
>>26683862
no. but in honesty seeing up close and personal just how much a vagina stretches as a baby comes out is pretty fucking weird.
>>26683849
small pupils make my cock hard desu
post more saya
was it a cute baby? :3
>white knighting
Childbirth is the one time women aren't playing on easy mode and you helped lessen her pain?
>>26684007
of course it was, all babies are
unless it was non-white, in that case it wouldn't be
>>26684036
thats not nice anon...:(
oriiii
>>26683849
bullshit
OP never delivers
>>26683849
how did it happen? greentxt pls
where the hell were you? and where was everyone else who might have been more competent? did you know the mother?
>>26683913
>wageslaving today.
>work at wallmart
>suddenly man rushes in carrying a woman asking to call an ambulance because their not going to make it to the hospital in time as his wife is having their baby.
>manager imiditately loses her mind not knowing what to do and is pretty much running around screaming because a woman is having a baby in our store
>suddenly another co worker screams "anon has medical experience, he can deliver the baby"
>my medical experience is half a semester at a veterinary 101 class from a community college. I told her this never expecting her to blow it out of proportion like this.
>note that I work stock so I didn't even know any of this was happening til two cashiers pulled me out of the back room and droped me in front of this woman with the top of a babies head sticking out of her vagina
>my first statement was simple
>THE FUCK IS GOING ON?
>before even having time to react this lady just kept pushing and pushing so being the closet person to the child I had to catch it and hold onto it as she delivered it.
>this had to have been like two minutes total from the top of its head stick out til the entire baby coming out(several hours in labor and child birth my ass)
>there I was covered in a strange fluids, holding a newborn child and being handed a towel to wrap it in by a coworker just as the paramedics arrived.
>only thing I could think was how the fuck did i get into this situation.
>>26684307
Are you an anime main character?
>>26684307
shit anon
you did get real lucky, or i should say the parents. if the baby had been inverted you would have had to do a lot more than just sit and catch.
what did walmart do with placenta juices all over its floor?
>>26684307
Are you getting any bonus pay or time off?
>>26684533
>Are you getting any bonus pay or time off?
did you miss the "wallmart" part? my uniform is going though its second cycle in the wash.
>>26684518
would of made my day better being that
>>26684519
pretty sure that mess got mopped up. janitor might be jerking off with his bucket of water for all I know.
>>26683934
>>>/c/2583519
>>26684307
>how the fuck did i get into this situation.
*BRRRT* *freeze frame*
You might be wondering, how did I get here?
yo how rekt wuz dat pussy after da bby come out senpai
>>26684576
how'd the parents react? were they grateful at least?
>>26684714
I was aware of that thread.
>>26684841
you seem to watch too much tv
>>26684876
pretty gross
>>26684970
they thanked me a bunch. then again everyone was also like "you the man" after that.
>>26684307
What about cutting the cord? Or removing the placenta?
>>26685162
>just as the paramedics arrived
>>26684841
Holy kek Anon, good one
>>26684307
Dude, FUCK that.
>hurr anon pls birth another human being
>"Fuck you, Chad can help his whore shit out the kid himself"
>"Also, I quit. Why the fuck am I working at Walmart?"
>leave
>>26685370
I wanted to hear more fgt
>>26685500
Cute girl
>>26685567
it seems we have met on the same thread
>>26685625
>stalking me on another board
>>26685781
How romantic~
I'm shipping you two now.
>>26685567
>>26685625
l0sers
>>26685567
>>26685625
>>26685781
You have been muted for 2 seconds, because your comment was too low in content (0.00% content).
You have been muted for 4 seconds, because your comment was not original.
You have been muted for 8 seconds, because your comment was not original.
WHO THE FUCK TURNED THE ROBOT BACK ON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
/sp/ up in this bitch!
>>26685797
Please no
>>26685819
U can post ass here
Was it a girl or a boy?
>>26685897
rly now
>>26685959
Unf u lil whore.
>>26683849
Why 1 is 1?
>>26685625
Did you like TLOP?
Yeezy is my favorite
Did she poop herself?
>>26686035
u l t r a l i g h t b e a m
>>26683849
>taking the time out of your day to deliver the baby of another man and received no compensation for doing so
congratulations, you are the ultimate cuck
Today I almost puked when I was tendering chicken breasts because there was a vein full of blood still in one of the breasts.
If I had to do what op did, I would have definitely hurled all over her newborn.
>>26686057
This is a god dream
This is everyyyyything
GOAT song
>>26683849
>>26683934
>>26685781
What anime is this?
also very berry original comment
>>26684307
Did that experience scored you a date with a cute girl?
>>26686314
Dagashi Squashi
>>26686294
<3
you have great taste in kanye
did you like waves?
>>26686386
go back to /nfl/ this is my thread now
>>26684307
Was the woman pretty young? I've heard that young mothers (like early 20s) tend to breeze through childbirth, whereas women in their 30s are straining away for hours.
>>26686314
The new fate stay night
>>26686386
Thanks. Good to know there still are decent people on /r9k/
>being a literal cuck
lol you faggot
>>26686404
>I've heard that young mothers (like early 20s) tend to breeze through childbirth, whereas women in their 30s are straining away for hours
i never thought about that but my brother's wife gave birth in under 15 minutes and she was 19.
>>26686401
>you have great taste in kanye
I've waited 12 years to hear this
This is the nicest thing anyone's ever told me ;_;
<3
Waves was godly. Looking forward to the full version with Frank, Sia, and Vic.
>cover Saint, in lambs wool
>we surrounded by, the fucking wolves
Gives me goosebumps every time
>>26686612
aww you're cute
the verse of the album for me is chance on ultra, it's SO fucking spiritual and beautiful
the full version of wolves is out i think?
http://www.audioclouds.net/index.php?a=track&id=223
>>26686035
TLOP was pretty good
the intro was near perfect imo
>>26686704
>if Young Metro don't trust you, I'm gon shoot y-
>BEAUTIFUL MORNING
That fucking beat drop.
Waited 2.5 years for this.
Godye Blessed
Did you like the new Facts?
Charlie Heat deserves all the praise.
>>26686679
Chance was amazing.
Hope they put his verse back into Waves.
Never really like Chance until that song, but the fucking emotion, senpai.
Yeezy even made Thugger good and Weeknd killed it on FML.
I'm glad Kanye is back to music with 40 Kendrick songs and 40 Thugger songs.
We eatin good in 2016
>>26686863
The Charlie Heat version was good. It was just enough to not overdo the songs style and make it sound better
>>26686986
Agreed.
I didn't really like the original version. I remember sitting alone on new year's eve and it dropped and it was like wtf?
But I've got the Charlie Heat version memorised and on repeat.
