Tell me about your failed suicide attempts, robots. What did you plan out and how did you fuck up? Were you caught or found? Would you try it again?
>>26586407
>took a bunch of tylenol and set up a helium exit bag
>tfw gf and her sexual bf showed up in my room because I told them I was going to be out at library for a while and they were going to use my room for sex
>tfw gf's sexual bf ripped apart my exit bag and carried me like a baby outside where I had to wait on his shoulder until the ambulance came
Tried to kill myself by using a smashed vodka bottle. When that didn't work I tried to kill myself by swallowing glass. I ended up going to the hospital when I could walk again because I obviously wasn't going to die and it was pretty painful.
All I learned is that alcohol poisoning is not fun and trying to kill yourself when you're extremely drunk isn't a very good idea.
>>26586469
Why didn't you use a kitchen knife?
>>26586528
I wasn't at home and didn't have anything else on me
It was a pretty rushed situation
>be me
>heavily depressed at 17
>tried to overdose on pain meds at school
>my dumbass has pill bottle in backpack
>bf goes in backpack for a pencil
>sees empty bottle
>tells teacher and ambulance is called
10/10 will probably try again one day
>>26586464
what the fuck? gf and sexual bf?
are you her non-sexual bf or something?
>>26586557
Just jump in front of a subway or a train, it really isn't that hard...
>>26586801
I'm her emotional bf. We share emotions like when I take her to the movies or to dinner but she only has sex with her sexual bf.
>>26586847
This is to cuck to be real, please tell me this is bait.
>>26586847
Sounds like hell.
Get out of this "relationship". It ain't healthy.
>>26586847
I'm getting memed aren't I?
>>26586464
>sexual bf
What the fuck kind of cancer is this shit, and why is it on my board.
How much would it hurt to stick a knife into an electrical outlet? I have no guns, no money, and no car. Too tall to hang myself. Water's frozen solid so I can't drown. Literally no way of offing myself.
>>26586948
>Water's frozen solid
If you're in cool weather, just drink a bunch of alcohol, head out into the forest somewhere and let yourself freeze to death.
>>26586407
OD'd on diabetes medication, trazadone, and whiskey. Was pretty pathetic.
>>26586407
>overdose on heroin
>stumble to park
>they revive me
JUST
>>26586990
I've never bothered getting a driver's license, and my parents never buy alcohol, so I don't have access to any.
>>26587029
Should have gotten a fake DNR medical ID thing
>>26586407
tried slitting wrists. I knew what I was doing, but I got found by someone and put in a hospital.
>>26587062
Or you know just overdose at home or in a motel or somewhere else private instead of in a public park.
>>26587034
Get a state ID. That's what I did for booze.
You could always slit your throat. Just look up where the major arteries are, to the sides, you'll bleed out in seconds.
>>26587077
>I knew what I was doing
If you really did you'd be dead right now.
>He doesn't know his T's
>>26587077
Isn't slitting your neck's arteries more effective and faster anyway? Slitting your wrists just sounds far too low energy.
The last two times I tried to off myself, something happened to make me stop.
>going to off myself late one night
>decide to watch a random movie on tv because I have nothing better to do
>girl in movie has my sisters name
>movie is about her friend that killed herself years earlier
>get depressed and have a change of heart
>get ready to kill self
>phone rings
>decide to answer it because it'll be the last person I ever talk to
>it's an ad for a funeral service saying families don't have money to pay for funerals
This was years ago. I really want to die, but fuck, am I supposed to live? I don't know what to do. I am struggling so hard at this stage in my life.
Is something important going to happen? What am I missing?
Please.... fuck
>>26587177
If you do it properly you'd die very quickly, and there'd be jack shit anyone could do about stopping the bleeding. Even if they were sitting right next to you and saw you start cutting.
>>26587255
>tfw it feels like life is just a cruel experiment and some higher force is psychologically and emotionally fucking around with you for jollies
I ran away from home once
My goal was to make it out deep in the woods and die from dehydration.
I wussed out, after 20 miles because my legs couldnt take it any longer. So I took the bus back home and had very sore legs for the next week.
>>26586826
This.
Happens all the time and is incredibly effitient.
Plus, you piss off some normies by causing a delay.
>>26587255
Things are only going to get worse, so don't wait up.
>>26587294
I thought about doing this.
Just driving on the highway and parking my car somewhere. The highway is always surrounded by wilderness. I figure this is how I'd go.
Just find a tree to sit under and wait.
>>26587331
Why such a longlasting and suffering sudoku?
Just jump in front of a train and go out with a splash!
>>26586887
This is bate
>>26587255
Go do something you've never done. Only advice I got life is pointless so I just get high and do whatever the fuck I'm feeling
>try to saw my head off with a kitchen knife
>so fucking blunt it doesn't even cut when I shove it against my arteries with my left hand
>grab another and try again
>same fucking bluntness again, everything in the goddamn drawer is blunt
Still feels awful. Was gonna donate my organs and everything.
So what's the agreement on suicide methods which are unlikely to fail? Buckshot to the head is an obvious one, but eh, I'm not much of a fan. I think exit bags are still very much in the competition as long as you aren't an idiot and don't try to use oxygen cut helium (by the way, the adulteration has absolutely nothing to do with it's use in suicide). Personally I'm a fan of the idea of hardcore downer overdose, but that has obvious risks of failure, especially if you half ass it, which most people do.
>>26587923
>buckshot
No, slug.
>>26587883
You can post shit on this site but don't have the money to buy a cheap knife. If I were you I'd spend all demoneys I got on a cool ass knife
>>26586847
Not sure what pisses me off more, that you put up with that without murdering both or her behavior.
>>26587883
You didn't have any knife sharpeners?
>>26587933
Either way, the hot gas will basically make your brain implode. A 12 gauge blank could probably kill you.
>>26587974
Why take chances though? Slug is objectively the most destructive ordinary instance of ammunition you can purchase for this purpose, might as well use it.
>>26587966
Just a whetstone, didn't have the foresight to get 'em into killing order beforehand. Shame on me.
>>26587959
>implying i pay for internet
I guess I could just grab one and do it in the middle of a wal-mart or something, but making a fuss is low brow and the guy who's gotta clean that shit up doesn't make nearly enough.
I tried to jump in front of a car, they all saw and stopped.
>>26587988
I really doubt it makes much of difference, as long as you aren't you aren't using birdshot or a lower gauge shell.
>>26587923
Shotgun to the head, taking strong poisons, jumping off a building and getting hit by a train are god-tier, you can't really go wrong with these.
Hanging, slitting and other gunshots would be high-tier: still effective methods that however have a chance of failing and leaving you as a wheelchair-bound vegetable for the rest of your life.
I haven't done much research on carbon monoxide and electrocution, but they could seem to be promising. Overdosing on meds could be good too.
>>26587034
Make your own booze and walk.
>>26588070
If there's anything I want to be extra-sure about, it's attempting to kill myself seeing as how when you fuck it up you end up as a mutilated zombie on life support paralyzed below the neck.
>>26588079
I know someone who survived a building fall completely intact. I think it's pretty easy to overestimate it's lethality.
On the issue of poisons, if you really have an effective poison sure that will work well, but sourcing something like that which is effective wouldn't be easy.
And carbon monoxide can be effective, but from everything I've heard the traditional methods for committing it are extremely uncomfortable and can be hard to go through with sometimes.
>>26588054
You dumb fuck if you can pay for a phone or computer whatever the fuck you are using I'm sure you can find a way to buy a 5 dollar knife now kill yourself for being so fucking stupid
>>26587923
Just use an exit bag with nitrogen, you don't feel a thing and you pas out in 30 seconds and die in 3 minutes. Fast, painless, easy.
>>26588112
I don't think the odds between buckshot and slug are really that different. Both will completely annihilate your brain.
>>26588145
Not him but I live with my parents, so I never have to pay for anything. And I got my computer on sale for around 300.
>>26588145
Or just shoplift one. It's not like it matters if the plan is to off yourself.
>>26588054
I can tell you really don't even want to die
>>26588159
If the odds are even 1 out of a trillion more in favor of surviving with buckshot, then going with slugs instead would be worth it. There's no reason not to go with the more destructive ammunition since both are extremely easy to obtain and killing yourself successfully is something you will only do once and if you fuck up you could end up never getting another chance to try again.
>>26588126
How many stories tall was the building?
Was the person falling head or feet first?
>>26586407
I went to blow my brains out thinking it'll have a slim chance on enlightening my parents; the gun wasn't there. My dad saw this coming lol. I don't believe in death. This is about how serious I find death it would be the equivalent of throwing away one of my favorite outfits. oh noes!
Got caught trying to pick the lock on my dad's toolbox he keeps his gun in
>>26588176
Then sell whatever you are using to post on this site...holy fuck are you people dumb
>>26588208
I'm not entirely sure whether or not slugs are inherently more destructive than heavy buckshot. Are you basing this off of things which you genuinely know, or just preconceived notions?
>>26588210
I really don't know. It could've been feet first, the guy is mentally unstable and kind of a dumbass honestly. He recently planned on a suicide pact with a druggie using heroin, then that guy took his money and ran.
>>26587098
bahahaha this forum is fucked up!; giving quality suicide advice. lmao
>>26588176
>Got my computer on sale for around 300
Ok?????????
>>26588272
Fuck off faggot. Seriously, get out, now. Go back to circlejerk or /b/ or fucking 9gag or whatever meme obsessed shithole you come from.
>>26587098
Could the throat slitting method turn you into a paraplegic if you fuck up and don't die? That's probably my worst fear right now, and also why I'm skeptical of many other methods.
>>26588335
I can't think of any way you could end of paraplegic, but maybe in a freak situation you could end up still alive but with brain damage.
Man coming to r9k after a hard day in college is my motivation to work hard so i don't end up like you cucks.Keep it up anon's :D
>>26586464
>gf and her sexual bf
This meme really needs to die.
>>26588253
I love my computer more then anything, I'd never sell it. You'd never sell a sibling, would you?
>>26588279
He was making it out to be "if you're spending thousands of dollars on a computer" because I figured most people on this site would e buying gaming rigs, not potato simulators.
>>26588523
If you're killing yourself I think you'd be willing to sell it. Do you know what thread you're on? And I still don't understand why I give a shit how much he payed for his computer
1 (800) 273-8255
If you ever need someone to talk to or are suicidal you can call the National suicide line. Counselors can help you for free.
You robots are just starting life, you dont even know what it really is yet, so don't permanently destroy yourself over temporary feels.
>>26589663
Yea dude you are way too late this thread is dead
>>26588296
I come from 4chan its just /r9k/ is fucked lulz.
>>26589663
>You robots are just starting life, you dont even know what it really is yet
37 year old robot here. FYI I can tell you life is awful and the sooner you can end it the better.
I took a shit ton of paracetamol when I was 15 trying to suduko, I researched it beforehand and it should have been more than enough to kill me.
I swallowed them then went to sleep thinking I'd never wake up only to wake up a few hours later experiencing the worst nausea and pain I ever have, threw up a bunch of times then laid down on the cold slate of our house for relief.
After a few hours the nausea and pain passed and I went to sleep, woke up later feeling fine and my liver was totally fine when I got it checked a while later.
Fucking weird man.
Another time when I was 18 I setup the coal bbq method in my car but pussied out, just waiting there to die has your primal survival instincts screaming at you, at least with the pills I thought there was no return once I had swallowed them.
My car still smells like smoke 4 years later.
Next time I'll be using hard drugs to OD, I'm sure it's only matter of time before I do.
>>26590256
There's your problem, instead of making a life you come here to complain.
>>26588155
This is probably a stupid question, but what's an exit bag.
>>26589663
Yeah, I really fucking want the cops to bust down my door and give me an involuntary psych hold, that would be just dandy.
>>26590470
Try to find barbiturates if you can. Fentanyl and flubromazolam are also worth looking into. Heroin is always a good choice too.
>>26590663
It's a bag which you place over your head before filling with inert gas (i.e. not oxygen, but also not inherently poisonous). Inhaling a gas like nitrogen or helium in a pure form will cause unconsciousness extremely quickly and painlessly, and cause death in a few minutes from oxygen deprivation. You also use carbon monoxide if you really want to.
>>26590789
well I'm already addicted to Heroin lol, and benzos to a lesser extent, so I'm prolly gonna go with those + alcohol
>>26590902
Dude opioid OD is not the way to go. It's like drowning on dry land.
>>26586407
I ran my car off a bridge but the guy living near it saved my life. Now I'm under constant watch.
>>26589663
Have you ever been mocked by your entire school and family? Like seriously bullied by your own parents? I would've shot up the school and home if I weren't in a Cuck'd country.
>>26590934
Thats why I wanna be fucked on benzos and alcohol first
Also looking into Nembutal, dunno if its already been mentioned in this thread but its a drug used for eunthensia
not me but a guy I worked with tried to an hero with a gun. Shot himself just infont of the temple with a .22 blew out both of his optic nerves but didn't kill him. He's blind now
>>26590789
If that's your concern, then call from Skype or a burn phone.
Why don't you guys just eat a bunch of food from the dollar store, that's a guaranteed death.
>>26586464
>be me 14 years old
>have 10 xan's in yor left pocket
>take them all at once
>found unresponsive on the shitter
>rushed to ER
>revived
would not try it again
