/who lonely and suicidal here?/
Do you guys often dream of death before you fall asleep?
>Dream
>Not asleep
I just want to die with someone in my arms, man
>>26568869
Try looking for a suicidal buddy?
>it's another one of these threads
>dreaming before sleeping
Always thinking about how shitty of a person I am right before falling asleep
>>26568829
nah nigga, don't you know nothing comes after you die? it's just infinite nothingness. yeah you aren't conscious to experience it but fuck. you only have 1 life, mang.
>>26568928
>Not wanting to fall into nothingness
>>26568829
>/who lonely and suicidal here?/
Me. I hate that I couldn't have been born someone else. Instead I got stuck with the shittiest possible outcome.
>>26568954
but you'll fall into the nothingness either way
why do you wanna opt out now? is the pain that unbearable?
>>26568995
Same out of everyone in my family I got the worst genetics possible. This is the worse feeling.
I want to die in a fight, I don't want to kill myself. It would be nice for life to actually be worth getting excited over before the end.
One thing is for sure though, no hospital bed for me. I don't consider myself to be alive right now, but I will be before I go.
right here family - ZERO friends not even online ones, live alone, family hates me / disowned me, coworkers loathe me, can't even remember the last time I had a real genuine engaging conversation with another human being, people seem afraid of me.
>>26569395
post your steam maybe we can be friends unless you don't wanna
>>26568829
I'm trying to find my purpose
If I can't make myself happy, maybe I can make someone else
>>26569395
Same here in a way, I am sometimes able to make friends online, but they always delete me because I say something wrong or are too weird etc., it makes me lose hope completely tbqh
>tfw got an online friend
>Tfw it's just platonic
>tfw the desire for a qt is still there
It's not enough. I can't fill the hole with friends. I want love.
Don't boozle YOUR self kid
>a Stacy ran a red light and slammed into my vehicle
>wishing it had killed me
Should have been driving a prius instead of a truck. This was my exit plan, I could have had ended my shitty life but the dumb bitch wasn't going fast enough.
Every night...even right now. It would be so easy to just go out, hike to the top of the nearby mountain, and throw myself off. Falling headfirst, I'd die instantly with a destroyed skull/broken neck. Plus, I'd fly for a little while. Maybe I'd change my mind on the way down, but that's the beauty of it: I could give in to it whereas I truly can't right now.
The alternative is...well, who knows. I feel like living in some cases, but it can flip back around sometimes in only a few minutes (thanks, bipolar family, schizoaffective disorder, epilepsy). I feel that having a partner in life could help, but none of them ever feel right; I become attracted to a girl, but the closer I get, the less I want to be near them. I don't deserve them; the more I realize they're great, the more I realize they should be with someone else who isn't depressed and isn't consigned to a life of vanity.
I feel driven to make something great, but can't motivate myself to get out of bed in the morning. I make huge leaps in creativity and drive whenever I CAN start feeling good, but when I'm how I am now, it is all pointless. I know that other state exists, but that's ALL I know; I don't know how to get back to it, and even when I do, I can't do it. Exercise, diet, meditation, force of will; all things I know will help, none of which I get myself to do.
Tomorrow I told myself I'd get myself out to get my homework done at the math assistance center; theoretical mechanics is just too hard to do solo. Odds of me doing it? Pretty slim really...I could use a partner in bed to get me going in the mornings. The one girl who supports me, my family shames me for having in my life - a three-years-younger mormon girl with aspergers who looks like she's 12, and has the emotional intelligence of that age. Yet, she cares about me. Is that not enough? I either live a life of shame, or a life of depressed, pointless isolation. I think I might just choose shame.
>>26568928
The nigger is right
You won't get any rest, rest would require you to be able to consciously experience nothingness, but you can't because you won't have a consciousness anymore
>>26569962
Nice copy pasta m8 but didn't read it all.
Despite the fact the I have the perfect gf,yes. With the exception of her I literally don't interact win anyone,and it makes me guilty because my gf is a normie with tons of friends.it's gotten to the point where I'll spend the week depressed and completely alone,and the weekends having fun with my gf.
I've been on and off with thinking about killing myself,mostly because my gf would told me she would do the same if I ever did. I don't know what to do anymore
You just have to find your inner peace, live for something other than yourself, be grateful for what you have, lower your expectations, and have hope for the future. A girl /can/ love you. So you're a 2/10 neet? You can meet a 2/10 neet.
>>26568903
I'm scared I'd just piss them off or something. Or they'd piss me off. I can't hold just anyone, it has to be the right person.
>>26571211
she probably cuckin you with chad
Can I die from depression its self without actually killing myself?
I'M BREAKING THE HABIT
IM BREAKING THE HABIT TONIGHT
>suicidal
It was so long ago I can barely sympathize. And things have only gotten worse. What keeps me going is that there's people I can help potentially and there's people who would be sad if I died before them.
It just doesn't matter how you feel anymore. I don't cry regularly it's just normal depressing thoughts all the time. When I do cry it's a relief because it feels like I'm close to caring again. Even though I can't honestly say I relate to why the bitch started crying again it does penetrate more. Changes things up. Which is nice. Two latest cries were 6 days ago and 04/04/2015. Feels good that they're more frequent now. (unless this is is just random)
I'm lonely, but I'm not suicidal. I'm mostly empty, with the occasional mental breakdown every now and then. I normally pass the time by watching silly youtube videos, playing video games, binging on manga/anime, and roleplaying (both erotic and non-eroticbut mostly erotic).
>>26568829
I think of killing myself every single night.
This place is just a waiting room for the damned.
>>26572298
dangit bobcat
It's on and off. Approximately twice a month or so I have a phase that lasts a few days or so where I very much want to off myself. Last time I made a suicide thread here and some people wished me luck but then I didn't actually do anything, so sorry for lying to you guys.
I figure it's bipolarism. Recently I gave the first blowjob of my life to a rifle. From an existential point of view, I feel like I don't really have anything to live for but how much that actually bothers me changes a lot. I drink daily, get high weekly or so, and spend most of my time on those days when I can get out of bed before 3PM doing /tg/ shit.
>tell people I think about suicide all the time
>they assume I hate myself and think I'm worthless
>actually want to kill myself because a great person like myself should not have to live in this vile, degenerate society
>>26568829
Why suicide when you can hurt people?
>>26573046
>/tg/ shit
with people or by yourself?
>>26568829
>Be gay
>Have morals and/or standards of any kind
Welp
