Child Abuse
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You are currently reading a thread in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001
You are currently reading a thread in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001
Were you guys abused as children? I feel like a lot of the problems people have on this board are very telling of childhood abuse. My therapist just told me my parents were abusive to me in my childhood and i never knew.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-compassion-chronicles/201501/healing-the-shame-childhood-abuse-through-self-compassion
this article talks about it.
>>26555930
Yea.
My mom would make fun of me a lot, about my appearance and stuff, and call me a faggot.
>>26555930
not at all. in fact they still love me.or do their best to make it appear so
how can i know if i was abused
i experience every single symptom of shame listed but I don't know if I was abused
what counts as abuse?
>>26555997
yah thats the thing I thought my parents loved me and that my life was really normal and that I just sucked as a person. My therapist says I'm shit as a result of the abuse. IDK who to believe because that sounds like some feel good bull shit but i also heard you need to forgive yourself first.
>>26556036
I dont really know were you neglected? physically abused? emotionally abused?
>poor teen single mother
>no father figure
My shit was just thoroughly fucked
I remember having an STD and that my asshole was torn up and bleeding, lots of other evidence points towards something being done to me when I was a little boy by an adult male who lived in our house for a while... I think other kids were involved. my life is a huge mess, im trying to better understand what happened
>>26556086
>>26556070
you guys ever try going to therapy? I still havent gotten over my childhood abuse but I mean at least now im trying? now i understand why im such shit at least
>>26555984
My dad called me an autist to mock me. Guess what now
>>26555930
Don't believe that goddamn quack until you have actually proof - not some bullshit theory. Not some hidden 'memory' that she helps you 'unlock'. Some actual proof
Spanking and hitting by my step-mom, sometimes my dad (never hitting though). Step-mom would also demean me.
Depends if you call that abuse.
>step-mom wants to adopt some 13 year old girl that someone in her family is too complacent to take care of or something
Wew good luck if this happens
>>26555930
Yes, yes, good goi. Your problems are deeper than you thought. Give me all your shekels and I shall look into my crystal ball for a decade long solution.
>>26556151
My dad called me a friend less loser & would often yell at me for the smallest mistakes, guess who's got a nervous tick now. Funny thing is I cutoff all contact with him but he's tried contacting me ever since
>>26556116
Ive had a lot of therapy, I can see myself having a lot more in the future as well. It does help but it takes a long time. Im also on some pretty strong meds. Unemployed failure here with an unhealthy relationship to alcohol. The worst thing is knowing that ive let my parents down
Domestic violence.
No father figure in my life
>>26556212
He was using you as a lightening rod for his own insecurities.
verbally abused, gas lighted all the time, guilt tripped all the time
sometimes I wish I was physically beat instead, at least I would have learned to be tough. instead I was verbally reduced to nothing.
>>26556276
>at least I would have learned to be tough
Nah I assure you it would have been the reverse
>>26556160
well my actual proof is my dad broke my collar bone and my parents screamed at me constantly from age 5-15
>>26556276
>>26556293
its not the only reason im tough is the physical abuse i withstood. I think if it was only emotiomal abuse i would be a pussy but instead im fairly chaddish... i just wish i didnt want to die all the time
>>26556302
how did he break it?
I have a perfect nuclear family.
I have ADHD tho.
I wasn't really abused but I was molested a couple times when I was like 7 by one of my neighbours who was like 15
People say that being molested as a kid leads to problems, and I do have social anxiety, but I've never really seen how there could be any connection between those two things
>>26555930
I hit my younger sister on the face once (lightly) and she started crying. My dad ran up to me and gave me a spinebuster, punched me two times in the gut while I was on the floor, then picked me up and gave me a suplex. That was probably the only "abuse" I've ever received. Only had some bruising and a bump on my head since I broke the closet door due to the suplex. I was like 5'8 110 at the time and my dad was 5'5 200 or something. We have a good relationship nowadays though.
They chopped off the most sensitive part of my dick, so yeah, I was.
>>26556322
he threw me to the ground and jumped on my chest breaking it with his knees. then he pummeled my face so bad i had to tell people i got into a fight.
>middle child syndrome
>mom totally distant
>dad totally distant
>they fought all the time
>dad has serious anger issues
>only given attention to complain at
>never taught me anything or gave me any advice, dad would always give me one try to learn to do something before he'd angrily snatch it away
26 now, can't form normal human relationships. When I'm financially independent I'm cutting my parents off completely. Only now that their other kids don't talk to them are they 'interested' in my life
>>26555930
>Were you guys abused as children?
I could write a comic book.
I was pretty much neglected, parents made it clear that if they could go back in time and not have me, they would... and nothing I accomplished would ever make them proud. My mom's also extremely narcissistic.
My sisters on the other hand were fully encouraged and praised, and grew up pretty normal. When I was younger I dealt with my feelings of inadequacy with anger, both at myself and my family, now I just accept that it was kind of a fucked up upbringing. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't physical abuse or anything, but growing up feeling that no one can ever love or want you, that your just a burden on everyone, has some pretty long lasting implications I'm still trying to shake at 23.
>>26556302
What did you do to deserve that...
wouldn't really call it abuse, but my parents took every chance they could to knock down my fragile ego and make sure I was extremely humble about everything I do
>>26556536
didnt want my mom to edit an essay that i wrote for school. she started screaming at me and my dad woke up drunk and beat my ass. he never hit her either only me. she just stood there and watched like a bitch
my mum was sexually abused by her father and used to always get drunk and scream and cry about it, feels bad because she wasn't actually trying to do wrong by me but she was just so desperate for compassion and relied too much on a 10 year old boy to give it to her. that and my lack of a father fucked me right up.
>>26556086
Could you elaborate? And the kids involved, what do you mean?
>>26556583
damn i feel for you man usually abusive people dont mean to do it. They were abused themselves and just keep the cycle going. it makes it hard to blame them for the abuse too
>>26556558
That is abuse, you are supposed to raise your kid to be confident
>>26556615
Yeah it's pretty awful, I hope I never get married because I'm probably going to batter my wife and fuck with my kids (not in a sexual way). I'll try not to but it just comes out in me. I'm a bad person honestly, I sometimes think I might be dead inside. I want to see a therapist but I can't afford private and the waiting list for public is 8 months long.
Thanks for the sympathy anon
>>26556430
Is your dad a Mexican midget wrestler or something?
>>26556605
My memory is fuzzy, I just remember things in fragments, like sensations, colours, shameful feelings. The dude used to live with my family, a friend of my fathers who was struggling to get on his feet, think he stayed with us for about 6 months. He had an abusive past, he drank a lot and did drugs, he was a strange man. My parents trusted him for some reason and he spent a lot of time with me, my brother and a couple of girls about our age as we hung out a lot because our mums were friends. He used to take us all on outings to "go to for ice cream" and such, but I know it wasnt like that.
I blame myself for any hurt that those girls experienced, I feel shame and guilt
>>26555930
>Were you guys abused as children?
Extensively. Regular beatings from both of my parents, molested by my father, constantly put down by both of my parents, older siblings took out their emotional problems on me, had to deal with corporal abuse at this shitty little backwoods church house my parents dragged me to...
I had such low self-esteem by the time I started school that the bullies could single me out from a mile away. Even some of the school staff bullied me, and other children. I generally didn't trust anyone growing up. I still don't. I hear about shit like mass shootings on the news and all I can think is, "So what?" All those victims were probably going to grow up to be just as shitty as everybody else in the planet. Yeah, some tragedy.
The only responsible thing I can do is never have any children of my own, which is a vow I've honored so far in my 30 years on this planet. Even if I think I know better than to avoid repeating my parents' mistakes, I think the abuse messed me up so badly that I would somehow manage to screw my child up regardless. It's just not worth the risk.
And therapy really doesn't accomplish shit. Tried that for over a decade. Done every medication they've ever thrown my way. There are some things you just have to live with.
>>26556672
>Yeah it's pretty awful, I hope I never get married because I'm probably going to batter my wife and fuck with my kids (not in a sexual way). I'll try not to but it just comes out in me. I'm a bad person honestly, I sometimes think I might be dead inside.
damn do i know this feel. Im always afraid of relationships because of how shitty of a person i am. I guess you could try reading some books on overcoming abuse? thats fucked up you cant get a public therapist for 8 months what if you were suicidal?
>>26556738
Idk dude if you don't have violent outbursts it should be easy to not raise your kids shitty.
Unless you're scared of molesting them like you were molested.
>>26556777
Yeah I am suicidal but the problem is if you admit that they admit you to a psychiatric hospital staffed by surly middle aged nurses who see you as scum and doctors who wish they weren't there, and you want to die even more but can't do it because you're watched 24/7, or alternatively you do do it because the staff are so damn neglectful they won't even follow procedure
Got arrested for a possession of a knife and threatening suicide a few months ago but didn't even get therapy or institutionalised, just a night in a jail cell and a judge who was kind enough to defer my sentence for good behaviour
the state is a fucking mess, I've always considered anarchism edgy but i can honestly understand to a degree given how damn indifferent the government seems to be to the welfare of it's citizens.
My dad would scream at me, throw me against walls, and beat me with a belt.
My mom would belittle me and cut me down at any opportunity.
My peers at school weren't much better, they made fun of me and threw things at me.
I got used to it eventually. As I got older my dad became less physical and my mom started ignoring me. Their fights from downstairs were all I heard after a while.
>>26556086
wait, what? You remember having that as a child?? how?? Jesus Christ that's awful....sorry anon
>>26556782
Not the guy you replied to but I am so calm, I would never hurt a kid intentionally. But I am so emotionally unavailable that any children I raised would be emotionless zombies. I would feel bad just for hugging them or trying to teach them life lessons because they deserve a normal parent not someone broken.
Can all the normalfags virtue signalling by going on about how "sorry" they are get out of the thread?
>>26556871
You, go on, git. Preferably to reddit.
>>26556997
I see, you could fake it but I understand the trepidation.
>>26556430
Your dad is crazy, cease all contact with him asap.
>>26556871
Well the memories just never went away, I would shove them away every time they came up and deny anything happened my whole life until a few years ago when I was brave enough to confront them
>>26555930
mum told me she almost aborted me
grown up in a broken home
life sucks
>>26556070
you're mom is stupid
that must mean you are as well, genetics and everything
>>26555930
When I was 10, my mom forced to dress like a girl, wear red lipstick and a wig for carnival and send me to school like this, and that isn't really the worst thing my family has ever done to me.
>>26557841
what if you just ignored her and did your own thing?
>>26557841
cont.
>My father was arrested 1 day before my sixth birthday and went to jail for 2 1/2 years.
>>26558004
cont.
When my father was released he got a new girlfriend he impregnated, 4 years after my little sister was born he started to hit her mother in front of her
>>26556430
Kek, your dad was white knighting hard as fuck.
>>26558107
when I was 16, my father got in a fight with my grandparents for dealing with drugs again, my grandfather was afraid that my little sister has to go through the same pain like my at this age and got a stroke because of the stress
>>26557841
Theodore Roosevelt was raised as a girl for half of his childhood. Quit making excuses for being a faggot.
>>26555930
Yeah I used to go around the whole village throught fields then climb the backyard fence so I avoided being burned by cigaretes.
>>26558203
I was some kind of a self harmer since I was like 6, after that happened I damaged one of my teeth with a pliers
>Saying anything negative is no abuse.
Make sure to tell your parents what they did to you kids.
>>26558294
I also used to cut my fingers and my legs with knives and told myself that I remove unnecessary skin
>>26555930
My dad has probably only hit me once when I was 5 for making my baby sister cry I guess. I never get into fights with him because our relationship is good enough
My mom was just relentless with the beatings when I was a kid but that only made me tougher and it was never something malicious. Reading all these abusive stories I can only imagine how much worse it could've been.
>>26557616
Irony
Ironicblox
>>26556365
>someone you know, possibly trust, abuses you and violates you as a child
>made anxious by social interactions now
How do you not see the connection
Were you being sarcastic?
my parents weren't abusive at all
they fought among themselves a few times when i was a small kid which left me scared and crying but that can't count as abuse
otherwise when i was a small kid we went on beach vacations, we watched a lot of movies together in the evening, i played videogames with my dad. they cared about me and my mom is still caring for me to this day since i'm a miserable failure at life aka manchild
>My therapist just told me my parents were abusive to me in my childhood and i never knew.
there's 2 types of therapists: jews and women, both are leftist and you should listen to neither
>dad once told me to help drag my bleeding unconscious mother to the bathroom
gee I dont know. Does that count as abuse?
>>26559185
Maybe she started bleeding from her nose out of excitement of how happy she was and fell and hurt herself so you both dragged her to the bathroom to treat her wound.
I think porn addiction from a young age has the same psychological effects as child molestation.
>>26559296
well shit. I was too scared to ask at the time. And all this time I believed my father was an abusive psychopath.
>>26559364
Back 2 reddit you passive aggressive cunt
>>26559364
Seriously though. Sucks anon. A-atleast you turned out fine. R-right?
>>26559487
Being unable to detect sarcasm is a sign of autism, anon. Get yourself checked
