Why are you lonely? Respond as sincerely as possible.
>>26486789
Unconscious desire to be detached because consciously I'm too impressionable around others
>>26486789
Because I never had a good example of a healthy relationship growing up, everything was distant or non-existant.
Also I have no money after fucking up college and my last job, and as a consequence live with my mom in her house, which is a no fun, no pussy zone of despair.
Because I hate the women I attract
>>26486789
I don't see myself being happy and ive dropped out of college. The only thing I could possibly live for is the search for philosophical answers and the seldom times I can hang out with one of my two friends. One is becoming pretty normal though and it isn't satisfying. It feels hedonistic. If I could do anything Itd be studying anti-aging in an attempt for philosophical answers(can't think of you're dead) otherwise I'll probably just kill myself sooner or later. I need to burn the bridges first so they won't be as hurt
>>26486789
No friends etc.
Like, I don't even know what you should do with people or about what you should talk with them, interacting with others without that protection of anonymity just seems impossible for me. I also often break up contact with others online, because I feel like I just bother them, there will always be another person, who would be much better for them, talking with me is like talking with a wall. 1on1 conversations just seem so alien to me, I don't even know anymore tbqh
>>26486920
Go for it, academics is cushy. Doesn't give you much but PhDs get their near poverty lifestyle comped by the university. Just have to be on your game amount getting grants which should be easy enough in that field
I don't know what I want, therefore am afraid of being involved. How can you build a relationship founded on no clear idea of what it'll be?
>>26486789
Because I lack social behaviors in my brain that prevent me from interacting normally with people.
It used to hurt me a lot but the part of me that cared is now dead.
>>26486789
I'm afraid of people, if I open up and show personality ill be rejected. I feel like I don't even know myself anymore and don't know how to rediscover me
* Moved around a lot as a kid, never learned to socialize normally
* Laziness
* Apathy
* Many bad experiences with others
* Few pleasant experiences with others
>>26486947
I've got the same issue, I always feel like I'm bothering someone when I talk to them, afraid that I'll be boring and eventually ed up being boring, but I have no issue being a snarky funny guy when around my family. I wonder if this thing has a name.
Everyone and everything is scary, and I'm not interesting enough to make and keep friends.
I have very few hobbies and the ones I have are very passive and uninteresting, and I have no sort of passion or motivation to move forwards in life.
Someone could genuinely want to hang out with me and I'd end up ruining it because I convince myself that they actually hate me and think I'm stupid.
I can't make people like me so in turn, I don't like people.
I'll be 30 this year and I've never had a relationship. I dated one guy for a couple months in 2006, another guy for a couple months in 2010, and fucked one guy on and off for about 4 years from 2011-2015.
I realized with this last one that I will never be wanted by a man in any meaningful capacity so I kept him around for as long as humanly possible in the faint glimmer of hope it might turn into something long-term.
Meanwhile I'm getting older and fatter. So there's really no point in dating anymore. But I make a very good salary, so there's that at least.
can't form real connections with people, even if they like me. my thoughts are a constant torrent of negative judgmental bullshit even though i'd never say any of it out loud. been trying "fake it til you make it" for years upon years, only thing that's changed is i'm a much better actor
>>26486789
I'm not. I'm alone, but I'm not lonely. Getting a job or even better, getting money, that's an issue, not tfw no gf.
Being vulnerable and open in front of someone and getting rejected is like getting knifed in the chest. I never want to do it again.
Too scared of rejection, too scared of meeting new people, too scared of revealing my true feelings, too scared of abandonment, too scared that everyone can read my thoughts and tell I'm a worthless shit right away.
Standards too high, low social skills, don't go outside much
Honestly man I think I might be like 1% autistic because I have fucking 0 ability to go up to a woman and start a non-cringe conversation. I feel like I can't connect with people like everyone else can. I hate it.
>>26486920
>I need to burn the bridges first so they won't be as hurt
This was exactly my thinking from the ages of 15-25. Then at some point I realized that I have a long life ahead of me and that I'd rather those future unknown experiences than be dead. And I don't want to be alone that entire life, so I started to participate more in life and try to say "yes" to things rather than a reflexive "no, ill get hurt or embarrassed" which doesn't happen as much as you think it will
Professionally diagnosed social anxiety is what I blame currently. But frankly I'm wondering if it's not because I'm in poor shape, I'm terribly ashamed about that.
Trying to fix that.
The anxiety is being dealt with too I hope.
>>26487089
I know exactly what you mean. I think I'm just now rediscovering myself after years of turmoil and depression. It feels like learning how to get back home. But one thing that helped was trying really hard to figure out what I wanted from life, and separating that from what I'm just envious of. I wanted to be compassionate, but deep down I'm selfish. It felt good to know where I stood, like I'm not lying to myself anymore, and I'm not extending myself beyond what I'm capable of.
>>26487225
More than that, I realized that not only will you not be embarrassed, but people are far more self absorbed to even pay attention - which is another whole set of depressing issues.
>>26486789
Because I finally realized that I don't really belong in this world. Now I actively isolate myself as much as possible.
>>26487252
>I wanted to be compassionate, but deep down I'm selfish.
i'm a lot the same way
i started making an effort to just b myself, only to discover that "myself" is sort of an ass
personally, i think i have attractive enough looks to date girls. i did when i was in high school.
the problem that i have is that im entirely uninterested in short term relations and it seems like thats all the women at my age want. i am not even remotely interested in sex unless the sex has some substance behind it.
why am i lonely? because the only thing ive ever seeked out in life is genuine, real love from a fairytale i keep to myself of "the one."
id rather be alone than used again, but i still desperately wish to not be alone.
I don't know honestly. I'm pretty addicted to marijuana which hurts my motivation to do anything. I'm also extremely uncomfortable in social situations.
>>26486789
Still in love with my ex so I don't try anything with the girls I meet
I'm not, fuck off failed normalfag.
>>26487332
I doubt it - what kind of ass?
You may feel more guilt than what's warranted. I thought I was too, but being an ass was also sort of a put on. Think b-tard humor, it was a flavor of the month so to speak back then. But once I felt that it was just shock value and it wore off I wasn't as much of an ass as id have thought.
Because I don't want to be friends with people who are shallow, as in, they are plebeian for every medium, and constantly are going out to cafes and shit.
It would be cool to make some friends which aren't shallow, but I don't know how to meet them. Also, they would still be kind of a burden, because I like being alone and doing what I want, without any obligations.
>>26486789
I feel lonely because I chose not to be numb and detached to my emotions. For the situation is because I am ugly and introverted but the ugly part is keeping me the most from relationships. Friends wise I am too different and cant function normally if I dont exhaust myself pretending. Its a result from not enough love and care from parents and being in isolation through my critical years before 20ties.
Now at 24 its hard even for normies to form meaningful relationships without their former friends, nearly impossible for broken individuals like me. I am glad that at least Im not lacking social skills, even though it exhausts me, I can still function semi normally in society, just without meaningful relationships.
>>26487336
Serious question; how old are you?
What you're speaking of is a kind of complimentary lust. As I got older I realized relationships only work if both are interested in building something more than merely your primal urge of lust. Short flings are entirely self serving but they're so common because it's so easy to unconsciously fall into them. Then when it goes wrong they can blame it on some minute or ridiculous factor because self awareness was never a part of the relationship to begin with. You're in for a rough road if you want the best kind of relationship this early in life - you're asking for the stars to align.
>>26486789
I was always either bullied or "that guy" for all of my life, so I don't trust people anymore.
I'm afraid of being hurt again, so I prefer to stay in my shell, it has worked until now.
>>26486789
After so much time on the internet, 4chan in particular, I can truly say that I'm not "lonely" anymore. Maybe as a kid, but not anymore. Relationships are all so fake and forced, it's like something straight out of a TV show, because normies live their lives how the Jew says they should. I actually discuss things I care about here and feel some sort of attachments to people and different boards are like different worlds. Maybe I want to talk about video games, I'll go to /v/. Maybe I don't want to be in a see of shitposting, buy go just talk shit, I'll go to /pol/. Maybe I just want to complain about how much I hate people, I'll go to /r9k/
Maybe I could use a_______boyfriend, but the more I think about 3D people the more I get disgusted
Even though I've been browsing for only 2 years, I feel like this place was made for me
>>26487480
i am 21 years old. i supposed you're right. what i'm asking for will be extremely lucky if i find it. protip: i won't i'm on the internet playing WoW 10 hours a day
>>26487591
LONDON
O
N
D
O
NJoking aside, I feel the same as you, except I started browsing 4 years ago andI'm a male.
No special reason, just cause I'm not interesting enough for people to give a shit.
>>26487675
Kinda young, especially for having stunted growth by playing vidya too much. I know because I was you.
Yeah, stop playing wow. Or don't and forget girls. Take one of those out of the equation and you won't feel the stress and despair. But I get it, it can be addicting. Even despair isn't quite hopelessness, even a saddening dream is more comforting than none at all.
>>26487392
i guess i'm mostly an ass by other people's standards.
i have a low tolerance for some of the dumb shit people say and do, and i don't hesitate to call them out.
there was a time when i was really pretty rude about stuff, but i grew out of that a long time ago and i'm civil enough now.
still, people have gotten mad at me and accused me of being too argumentative over what i would consider a friendly conversation
I cannot relate to people my age. Even when I try to socialize, I feel like I'm from another world. My co-workers go on about going out and getting black out drunk. I try to talk to them, but I do not care about that shit.
>>26487716
>I'm a malesame, being a gay is still a taboo
I grew up as an only child with out of touch old parents. I don't consider myself lonely at all, but I am alone and I prefer it that way. I have been in relationships and it made me a less complete person.
I never bothered trying.
I had friends and a gf in school because it just came naturally to me. I never initiated anything.
When i dropped out i started creating my opinions and realised i dont enjoy human contact and that im not interested in humans.
So now im lonely and happy
>>26487753
one day i will meet a 3d girl who is so anime that she seems 2d. i can't stop playing wow i've played for like 12 years at this point. since i was in like the 5th grade.
>>26487757
Me neither. I find that depressing and boring.
>>26486789
I struggle to communicate with almost anyone, but even shitter when it comes to girls
>>26487804
>gay
Interesting. I could never become gay though. I despise how women behave, but I still can't see males as anything more than bros, at best. Although feminine traps on the other hand...
>>26487755
Oh, hat problem.
I grew out of that by empathizing more, and giving less of a shit about arguments. It was a superiority thing for me, but after reading into the side I was defending I still didn't know what I didn't know about the issues. So once I realized my ignorance, it took the wind out of my sails, "how can I argue it if I don't truly know?"
Then what was left was just the feeling to dominate others. Ultimately i thought was a fools errand and just got apathetic about that shit. It's funny how much I changed - from being passionate about that sort of shit to shrugging off everything. I find things more dull, but at least I don't worry about the dumb shit dumb people will always continue to say.
That was my experience anyways. Ironically the smarter I got about arguing the less I cared. Ymmv
>>26487839
They call me quiet. But it's just I have nothing to say to them. We don't have the same interests. It makes me lonely but what can I do? I can't change the people I interact with in my life.
>>26487823
Keep living that fantasy. The general trend for women is that they date up. You have to be worthy of such a girl, and your otaku ways won't be attractive to her. If so, more than likely she'll be damaged
I just can't imagine myself being close with someone.
>>26486789
My inability to form long-term human relationships of any kind, my general anti-social behaviour and general hyper aggressiveness
It just feels like I'm detached from reality at this point. People don't feel real.I know the difference between anti-social and asocial behaviour.
>>26487910
I have no idea. Im mostly studying so I dont go to work now but when I was at work I just spent time in library. Kind of made my world around reading and dont care anymore about people. Its probably not healthy or I dont know what but what can you do? I tried to socialize for years, was friendly and inviting. It just doesnt work if you are too different as you said. I cant pretend and I wouldnt if I could, there is no point in that anyway.
>>26487890
I'd say it's an acquired taste. It started with anime, then doujins, then just admitting I'm a homo. It's not like I see every guy in a sexual manner, just like how "straight" guys see traps in a sexual manner.
>>26487943
i don't believe every single person of a single gender is the same way, contrary to popular r9k belief. maybe i'm crazy, but i truly believe that there is somebody out there that will care for the same things that i do, and i won't give up until i find her, even if looking for her isn't a super active process...
I'm socially autistic and I also don't think anyone would want to be with someone who doesn't want to do anything and has no ambition.
I also have unproportionally high standards - I can't help it. Don't take that the wrong way tho. I'm not whining and crying on the regular for a gf.
>>26488021
Eh, it's a stretch to say homosexuality is an acquired taste. That would mean it's something great and everyone should strive towards it.
Now on the other hand, saying "The Brothers Karamazov" is an acquired taste, that's different. The phrase fits more here.
I still like traps though, started with 2D, now I fap to certain 3D ones, but rarely. Since I started fapping to them, I think I started noticing male looks more. I wouldn't say I'm gay, but I think I can see better which male is hot and which isn't.
>>26488041
Don't give up on your dreams.
Of course there are exceptions, but I think those exceptions prove the rule. Not to mention the likelihood of meeting them is low, also given your shut in ways. But maybe you'll find them online.
Because I'd rather lock myself up alone than worry about what other people do. Was bullied a lot and took a huge hit to my confidence/self esteem (used to be more outgoing and social), this has kinda been the norm since then.
I have convinced myself I love my straight best friend, and can't imagine the thought of being as close with anyone else, male or female.
>>26486982
Yeah l might as well make a last ditch effort. If that doesn't go though there is always plan B
>>26487225
I'm not so afraid of being embarrassed as I am just not motivated. I haven't talked to one of my friends in forever and I could leave the other behind. I don't have a lot to lose so why be embarrassed? Interesting viewpoint though.
>>26487297
That and things will go away with time. Sure you remember that embarrassing thing from March 4 years ago but no one else does.
After all these years losing all contact with the outside world I literally feel physically bad when I'm outside.
When I have to get outside for a longer period of time and then finally come home I can feel my heart slowing down as soon as I open my front door. The moment I sit infront of my computer it's almost like I take some instantaneous drug to calm me down. I am so used to my home surrounding and my routine that I can't see how could I break out of my comfort zone. I can't even talk properly now, small talk is the worst for me, it's like a RPG conversation where you have to choose the right answer but instead you have a million choices to choose from.
No girl has ever loved me, liked me, stayed up thinking about me, wanted me, or even smiled at me. Never been checked out, never had anyone flirt with me.
>>26486789
because i once wasn't and now am, and it sucks even more. now i just work a lot and wait to die
Because I'm autistic and hate myself and never try to meet new people and am not capable of socializing, having conversations, or interacting with other people in any meaningful way. I'm also extremely boring, have no interesting interests, and hate fun hings.
>>26486789
>tfw no gf to watch anime with
Lets see...
>no friends
>only family is mom and dad
>never leave the house
>22 years old
>no social interaction since dropping out of high school
>severe anxiety, can't even interact with pizza delivery guy without spilling spaghetti
>can't play online games because human interaction is too much
I'm trapped in my own hell.
>>26486789
I ditched my last group of friends by intentionally having them hating me
I said I don't consider anyone who calls me "generic stupid nickname" my true friend (they all did kek)
Seemingly being phony is worse than literally humiliating someone and making everybody laugh at him
>>26486789
As lonely as one can be: Were I to be in jail instead of my room right now there'd be no much difference aside, obviously,
>>26486789
I never liked being around others, except a few close friends and family.
>>26488635
also when I'm surrounded by too many people or strangers I feel like I'm going to pass out.
I AM LONELY. But I don't feel lonely, and I guess that's what matters.
>>26486853
>>26486891
>>26487101
>>26487131
got feels for these anons..
me, personally,
only 3 girls were attracted to me in my entire life. but I didn't want any, because I'm just not made for them, I'm not made for FUCKING NORMALFAGS
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
one was really cute and it was actually not a long time ago, like a year or less. she actually had perfect looks for my eye but she was just so fucking normie I couldn't stand being near her for more than 8 minutes.
the second one was really fucking ugly and was a tumblrina aswell. the third one was in my childhood or some shit, I don't remember.
other than that, I have no real life friends, only friends I met through online communities. I talk to them every single day, today's talk was 10 hours.
I want a weird gf, not only a lurking one or some shit, I want her to be awkward, intimidating, with social anxiety or something. I want to lead her in life, I want someone to be almost fully dependant on me.
I hope you robots enjoyed my presentation.
goodbye
>>26486789
i dont leave my house often enough...
>>26489531
>I want a weird gf, not only a lurking one or some shit, I want her to be awkward, intimidating, with social anxiety or something. I want to lead her in life, I want someone to be almost fully dependant on me.
>>26486789
I'm constantly haunted by thought that I can never truly be honest about myself around a single person. So I just feel a void that can never be filled. Sure I have a few people that I can relate to that surround me but I'm just projecting a facade of myself to satisfy them. I don't know how to adequately describe it but it I feel like I'm not human at all.
Because I was made wrong.
Because I'm a freak.
Because I hate myself and I feel as though if I hate myself shouldn't ruin someone else's life because of that.
because i grew up overweight and people ruined my life because of it
even if a girl was attracted to me now i just couldn't believe her
>be highschool
>never got laid
>always tried to talk to girls I didnt know for nudes
>my picture was semi chad
>got some, some didnt
>word got around that I was a weird horn dog
>be chubby with shitty tier poofy thick hair
>get laughed at for being a cuck
>tons of rumors are spread about me
>some say I have a small dick
>some are that im a creep
>highschool ends
>get laid during spring break by some drunk slut
>cum in like 30 seconds
>tells me my dick is small and i cant last
i have no feeling for how people feel or what they say anymore, I'd rather just be to myself. I've seriously been alone for so long I find solace in being alone. Like I've been locked in solitary confinement to a certain extent.
I get too attached easily. I feel like there's no point to a relationship if it's not gonna last, therefore, they usually get bored and either cheat, or leave.
Maybe that's a bad mindset to have, but now, I want to improve myself the best way I can; To stop being a neet, being a personality, getting in shapei guess being a normie but without the pussy
But the feeling of loneliness really strike hard.
>>26486789
Because of the two girls I'm in love with, one already has a boyfriend. The other one is almost as shy as me, and may or may not already have a boyfriend, I'm really not sure.
>>26489880
people just say small dick whenever they want to offend you
i had people talking shit about my dick without ever getting to see it
because I'm transgender and refuse to talk to anyone who isn't sincere and accepting of it. The worst part is that I don't even know if I even feel like living because the transition is going to be so hard. It hurts a lot, and sometimes I'll lash out at people who I can trust, and they'll leave me for it. Sometimes I'll just be too heavy for too much of the time, and make them too depressed to keep spending time with me.
The only people I have left are those too lonely themselves to let me go. That's how shitty my life is.
>>26486789
people are too much work
I tried being social but since am not that interesting people are not interested in me either
I spark up conversation and the don continue and prefer to be in silence
>>26486789
Because I chose to dump someone who treated me like shit instead of waiting around for them to "get better" which they are highly unlikely to do.
>>26486789
Every time I speak up and try to be outgoing I come off as awkward, dumb, and autistic, and people wanted to avoid me, even online.
After I had enough of embarrassing myself I just stopped talking to people altogether outside of 4chan and work.
>>26486789
On the surface I'm the most bland and boring looking guy. If anyone gets past that they realize I'm fucking insane within a month or so without me doing anything I could think of that tipped them off.
I have a pretty bad stutter which means I can't talk most of the time. Life's pretty tough due to it anyway, making friends is just impossible. I find it very hard to just order some food at a shop or say my name to someone when I meet them. Everyday is stressful because of it, and the future just seems terrifying.
>>26489981
my four remaining friends after all that are a furry, two other suicidal-depressives, and another guy that deals with heavy shit
>>26489950
just thinking about those times boils my blood.
My dick is 6 1/2 x 6 inch girth.
I fucking hate normies man. I know Im going to die alone, I don't even want to get married due to my overdose of redpill anyway sadly. As much as I would love a son who looks up to me and adores me, I don't see it happening like how College was just a fantasy I never applicated myself too.
I need a kind of love I'll never actually find. I have mommy issues. I don't want some woman to replace my mother or anything, but I just want someone to love me, be very affectionate and be crazy enough about me that I'll never have to worry about them cheating on me or leaving me.
But I know that's unrealistic and I'm not worth it so I don't actually expect that. I also have too much pride and would rather endure being alone the rest of my life than take a chance and ask a girl out. I fear rejection too much.
I want love but I'm too afraid to actually find it. I know it's my fault and I have to get over the fear and just go for it, but when I'm in the moment I just can't. Yesterday at work a qt as fuck coworker and I were sitting alone in the break room and I noticed her looking at me a few times but I could never find the courage to actually do anything about it. I just can't.
I also fuck myself over with everyone by generally being a theatrical asshole that acts like he has everything under control when in reality I don't. But people don't want to be around a bleak little faggot, so I joke and act. I've lied and been different people so much I don't know how to show people who I really am.
I also can't seem to get over this girl I'm involved in a fucked up situation with. She strings me along when I have no chance and I'm an idiot for always getting my hopes up.
Valentine's Day isn't so great alone.
>>26487332
I did this too. I had to start working on not being an ass instead of "accepting myself". Who actually likes themselves if all of their actions and behaviours are things that they're rightfully ashamed of?
I haven't had a friend or even an acquaintance for three years. I wouldn't know how to maintain a friendship even if I were to find someone willing to waste their time bothering with me.
>>26486789
I care way too much about what other people think of me
>>26487895
You still sound kinda miserable though. You say you grew by empathizing but then you say now you're apathetic. Empathy and apathy are very different things.
I think that stopping the /b/ tier arguments is a step in the right direction and you seem incredibly self-aware which I commend you for
Maybe it's time to look further into self-improvement though. Do you want to get stuck in apathy for the rest of your life?
>>26490268
trust me when I say that hiding everything that you like is not only exhausting but requires you to isolate yourself from the people you like, out of fear of being clocked.
I feel like I'm accepted by normies, but at the cost of my own sanity. I just wanna spend my nights drinking and getting butt-fucked by people just as insane, if not more insane than I am. Most of my days, I want to die, but I feel too much empathy for others to kill myself. People depend on me to do things. It sucks. I just want to die, but I would feel bad if I died, because then I'm leaving people not only with emotional trauma, but also with all kinds of loose ends from obligations I made that will never be picked up.
>>26487910
You're blaming others for not being interesting instead of taking responsibility for your "boredom". Is it really that everyone else isn't interesting or is it that you're choosing not to respect what they have to contribute? It sounds like you think your own interests are superior.
>>26487969
being anti-social and hyper aggressive is the same as being asocial, no?
Either way - what are you doing to improve your anti-social behavior?
>>26489531
>one was really cute and it was actually not a long time ago, like a year or less. she actually had perfect looks for my eye but she was just so fucking normie I couldn't stand being near her for more than 8 minutes.
How was she "normie"? Did she have good hygiene and work hard in life unlike you?
>>26490457
What about yourself are you hiding? What is so bad that you can't possibly share it with others?
If it really is that bad (rape/murder/etc) how do you stop acting in such a destructive way?
What makes you think you're insane?
>>26490385
I'm a law studen, and I'm fit and active, and all that good stuff.
Doesn't mean I don't see a point, but I forgot to go into the empathy part. On my phone and didn't want to type it all up, since it wasn't my main point. It's not something I think I could concisely convey, but I think it's important way to not get upset at others. Like David foster wallace's take on living in a modern age.
Do I want to? Maybe not, but once you stare into the abyss, and so forth
>>26486789
Because I'm addicted to sadness & pain( not physical).
I have a couple friends, though, we never share our personal problems, they're really great and I like the times I spend with them.
The thing is, I never want to see them or spend time with them, I literally force myself.
I've always been an introvert and unable to make friends alone (it was always those same very very social friends who'd do introducing, etc. for me).
I've had a severe depression last year, which led to agoraphobia, and became a real shut-in, I'd stop going to uni, and only leave my room in order to shower/pee/poo/buy food. I did one suicide attempt. Ended up hospitalized, and now, I'm back at home living with my parents. After a year my suicidal thoughts are completely gone. I'm still on medication but everything's good. I'm able to make friends at uni, I go everyday to class, got good grades this semester.
And yet, I don't know why, but sometimes, mostly in the week-ends I stay alone in my room. And have a certain nostalgia of those times I felt bad. I keep watching dramas, and anime with muh feels in order to cry. I wish I could, like when I was depressed again, start to feel such a pain, I'd start to cry for no reason, sit on the ground, my legs against my chest, under my desk. I don't know, those were horrible times, really horrible, it was really painful, and I keep telling my psychologist I don't want to feel that ever again. But the truth is, I think it had its good sides, and I have no rational reason to give, which makes it so hard to describe it.
That's the reason why I'm slowly now and then, but more and more, slipping again in trying to be lonely. I've never accepted any invitation at uni, and I'm going out less and less with my friends. I know I shouldn't but I don't know why I keep doing it, and it somehow feels good.
>>26490780
I'm a tranny, and I'm scared to transition because it's going to cost so much money and possibly not even work.
>>26487131
Sounds a lot like me, except replace guys with women, and instead of an on-and-off sex thing I actually had a relationship.
But I'm 30 this year too, and that one relationship ('09-'13) was a nightmare I trapped myself in and should have left after the first year. I stayed because I was sure that I'd never get another one if I left, and sure enough, it's been almost 3 years and I haven't had a single date or sex or anything. Every time I meet a woman that I have chemistry with, she turns out to already be in a relationship.
>>26490973
Why not just be a feminine guy?
Often wondered this, and it's entirely my own fault.
I'm not overly socially retarded. I can hold a conversation, and I guess I must have some redeeming qualities because people seem to intentionally talk to me at university and stuff.
But I've always admired those who live a solitary life. Those who remain on their own, no wife, no kids, no friends, just their own little company. I was always a huge fan of Dick Proennekke for this reason.
So I aspire to be like them. I sit at home in tears with my phone vibrating once an hour or so with someone asking me to go out for a drink or whatever, but I deny their world, because I wish I was a good enough man, a strong enough man to survive on my own. But I'm not. So I get fucking lonely, and I'm the only person I can blame.
Deny the outside world, and atrophy.
![[Ohys-Raws] Saki Biyori - OAD (DVD 1024x576 x264 AAC).mp4_snapshot_19.40_[2015.07.29_19.36.49].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/VRgSA0j.jpg "[Ohys-Raws] Saki Biyori - OAD (DVD 1024x576 x264 AAC).mp4_snapshot_19.40_[2015.07.29_19.36.49].jpg")
>>26486789
On an abstract level, I feel as if human contact is inherently harmful and that humans are inherently evil. Imagine if you were the only man on an undeveloped planet. You could starve, die to the elements, disease, random accidents, and so forth. You can still do that with people around, but the difference is you can also be betrayed, attacked, used, lied to, and tormented. Humans just add another layer of suffering on top of what you can already experience.
Of course, being more realistic, I live in the 21st century. I can starve, but I likely won't. I can die to elements, but I'll have to go out of my way to. And although I can still be betrayed and hurt by others, I can filter them out and get my social outlets in places like this, if I so wish. But that's sort of where the loneliness stems from. People are shitty, myself included, and that's not news to anyone. So I filter them out and end up alone, because it's better to be alone than with others who hurt you.
Personally, I have trouble connecting to "the masses". Not to come off as a pretentious twat at all either. It's more like I just don't care about keeping up appearances in caring about mainstream media, events, or dogma. I mostly just care about my own inconsequential little nerd hobbies and my niche porn and that's it. I have nothing to talk to most people about because they aren't interested in me and I'm not interested in them.
Not only that but I find it ridiculous how much people can blather on about super trivial things and talk with confidence about stuff they know nothing about. I might speak 100 words in a day, other people average ~2-3k words a day and most of those words are wasted on meaningless babble. People will pass judgement on others and label people they've just met, saying so-and-so is "fake" or "creepy" or "an asshole". What ever happened to walking a mile in each other's shoes?
tl;dr- people are mean, dumb, shallow and boring and I won't have anything to do with it.
>>26486789
i reject attempts to get close to me because of fear of being vulnerability
>>26486789
>live in a very small-populated place
>bullied as kid
>over-protective mother
>i fucked up everything at the last year of highschool when i felt the few ''friends'' i had were making fun too much of me for not being enough normie + always got bad grades because I was too depressed to study enough and my parents were always arguing all day
>this led me to abandon school and lose all the contacts I had
>re-join school next year but didn't make any friends
>know a girl on the internet,have a short relationship with her but we were always arguing so it just last 4 months
>now i'm completely alone
>>26491201
because I hate my body for being too masculine.
I hate my nose, my chin, my brow, because they look attractively masculine. I hate them. I want to lop off my balls every time I get a boner. It's annoying and uncomfortable and it makes me want to scream. It's more than just, "I like feminine shit". It's, "I want to be a girl, now."
>>26491425
If you weren't born a feminine guy (features and bodywise) then DO NOT transition. The end result will just be disgusting and sad and you will never be (truly) happy.
![[Commie] Dagashi Kashi - 04 [546192B5].mkv_snapshot_20.34_[2016.02.12_09.56.48].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/zNXGeD7.jpg "[Commie] Dagashi Kashi - 04 [546192B5].mkv_snapshot_20.34_[2016.02.12_09.56.48].jpg")
I'm boring, not cool, and I haven't listened to TLOP yet.
>>26491425
o-ohhave you seen a therapist?
>>26491535
> disgusting and sad
I'll never be truly happy regardless. Let's be real here.
>>26491565
yup. It's been about a month now. I sent in the paperwork for hormones two weeks ago, and I might not be approved for them for another three, since I need to get bloodwork done.
>>26491570
But at least you'll be perceived as normal and wont have an added level of unhappiness due to society looking down on you.
Because the vast majority of people seems boring (or the effort required to engage with them seems unworthy) to me at first sight or is actually boring, and those who are fine end up being boring after some time.
>>26487104
yes, it's called avoidant personality disorder
>>26491658
society already looks down on me because of my escapist habits, self-hate and tendency to lash out at and emotionally shred idiots when I'm in a bad mood.
>>26486789
what's that anime you've posted there OP
I finished college, and I realized that I wasn't going to be in situations where I was forced to meet with new people or that things were going to improve. All my past relationships with friends had faded away and they became preoccupied with their jobs, had found a girlfriend, or they simply moved away. Was never close with family or the like either.
Everybody has grown up and become more distant, and I feel like I'm standing still due to never wanting to take risks and staying in my comfort zone. It's why I never asked a girl out or even dared try. It's why I don't actively meet new people or try new things. The only friends I've made in my life they've taken the first moves, or I was forced to interact with them by outside circumstance (school, roommates, etc). Fear of rejection and a fear of getting close to other people I guess.
I don't know. Just know I don't have that glimmer that things might change in the future like I did throughout college or earlier.
Because the only time I socialize is when I'm at work and I put on a fake personality for my co-workers and customers. Besides 4chan I have nobody to talk to about my real thoughts and interests.
>>26491919
I wonder what we would have all become without 4chan, let alone without the internet
>>26491919
> Besides 4chan I have nobody to talk to about my real thoughts and interests.
I know that feel,when I had some 'friends' at school and wanted to talk about some of my interests i was always made fun of
>>26486789
The type of women I attract are so god awful that being alone literally makes me better off. I cannot into long and deep friendship. THAT was when I was healthy and trying to make something of my life. Honestly didn't feel the lonelyness too much because I kept myself busy. Turned out that busy part was very important.
I have since became a sick sad little cripple of a man. On the plus side the nightmarish women I attract should lose interest and I already know that I suck at friendship. Downside is for obvious reasons my health and the inability to stay busy. Which turned out to be all important when it came to pushing back the loneliness.
Its game over me for robots. If you still got your health try to get out while you still stand a chance.
Because I am afraid of change.
>>26491970
Normies. Maybe even Chads and a couple Staceys.We all know that we only have 4chan, videogames and anime to blame for this.
>>26491919
whats the fake personality you put on? what does it consist of?
>>26491970
maybe we would have actually turned out normal. its easy to say that the internet has kept us alive or something, but maybe it was 4chan and the internet that allowed us to stay how we are, allow us to stay shut in indoors instead of trying to improve
le original commento
im not one to do psychology memes, but
>>26492084
look at this stupid fucker projecting like crazy
>permanently angry because it feels better than being sad
>hate people like an edgy teen
>constantly make fun of them and they interpret it as sarcasm or dry humor
>whenever someone tries to reach out to me i push them away because it'll just be normie advice
>crave affection but feel repulsed by it at the same time
>loud, talk with my hands, generally obnoxious
Honestly I can see why people wouldn't like me. They tend to drift away after they realize it's not a tough front and that I am genuinely a fucking asshole.
>>26492098
>>26492084
it's one way, but it's definitely not the only way. you're way optimistic if you think that. Actually, if it's that easy just turn off your internet subscription and see for yourself. I'm pretty sure 4chan helped me accept myself better as I saw others facing the same problems as I did. Sure, I still have anxiety issues and can't make significant relationships, but I don't feel bad about it anymore. I can be fulfilled in my own way.
>>26486789
because I fall in love with every girl I see that is at least kind of cute, but never talk to a single one. I have a crippling fear of the unknown, I don't want things to go horribly wrong between me and a possible mate. also I'm not very attractive
Becuase through growing up i learned how to cope by being alone.
I had siblings but during middle school and high school kids want to do their own thing and make their own identity.
So the status quo,the familiarity has usually been lonliness.
And that it must take alot of pent up frustration for me to abandon the fear of risking changing my situation. Otherwise the familiar is comfortable and i am person y
Through nature or niture or both that doesn't like to take risks.
As i have gotten older i tell my self that my psyche has been getting weaker and weaker and if i fail at attaining my dreams i will sure kill myself,Be a bitter scrooge to everyone, or go full on psychosis.
So i wait till i get so frustrated with lonliness that ill probably end up killing myself.
>>26490135
Had the same problem all throughout highschool and was bullied for it. Uni isn't any better. We'll all make it someday.
Because I want to be.
I spent the last year integrating myself into normie status, accepting coworkers invites to hang out after work, cleaning myself up, laughing at regurgitated shit that isn't remotely funny, pretending to be interested in the daily woes of these people, even had sex with one of them.
I fucking hated it. All of it.
The "normal" people's social lives are full of sickening amounts of dependency, pretense, and anything else they can do not to have to deal with themselves on a real level for more than a few minutes at a time.
The biggest misconception in modern society is that "real life" relationships are somehow better than the ones we've formed online. In an online setting, both parties have the option to simply walk away at any time once they see fit to do so, with 0 fear of repercussion or faux pas. If you have an interest that lies outside the realm of immediate pop culture, your best place to find conversation about it without anything else drawing the limelight is the internet.
I hate myself, but at least I'm not spending my life pretending I don't.
Because my standards are literally non-existent, and I'm not trusting enough. Too sentimental, want a fairy tale relationship and I know it isn't realistic.
I'm still waiting for my alien waifu....
Really,
>not in a financial or emotional state to be in a relationship.
>socially retarded and feeling old.
>>26486789
I had to move away to another country with my parents and left all my friends behind. known some of those guys for 13 years. Also I'm a recovering NEET and I think about suicide on the daily so it's kind of hard to get close to people.
I have no ambition.
Why would I?
>>26492206
Anon, hating people isn't exclusively for edgy teenagers, I've discovered that a teenager hates people but he doesn't realize why but whereas an adult hates people for all the right reasons.
>>26492206
>constantly make fun of them and they interpret it as sarcasm or dry humor
Fuck, I can relate to this.
When I took a mandatory speech course in college, the professor complemented me on my "wonderful sarcastic humor".
I wasn't making any jokes.
According to my Stacey "friend" its because I'm too insecure and it shows. In reality, I'm not insecure. I just have a deep rooted self-loathing and I'm a huge misanthrope.
>>26486789
No social interaction among peers besides really close friends who I hang out with occasionally. Lately my bros have been talking about marriage and one of them got engaged and then another one of them was thinking about it in a year or two. Shits really bums me out hard sometimes. I haven't dated a girl in like a year and I can never bring myself to go to a club or anyplace to meet grills.
But i'm somewhat content with myself, I'm in my career with decent pay and benefits, i have my car and i have 3 days off every week. I just want someone to come home to and go out with on the weekends with.
I essentially have the personality of Milo Yiannopoulos, along with generally the same views, safe for religion. I pride myself on my wit and off the cuff sense of humor, but I'm very vain and opinionated, and it just so happens that there aren't many people that are charmed by that sort of thing when I live in an overwhelmingly liberal area.
I'm a homosexual robot (And thus mentally ill) yet I want a mongamous relationship with another homosexual man who isn't a slut.
Did I mention I want it to be a monogamous relationship?
>>26490458
Of course I think they are superior. Who does not like what they like more than stuff they don't like?
>>26486789
I'm an ogre. And a socially awkward one at that.
People hate ogres.
>>26486789
I enjoy life this way, after some time people start to bore me
I can't really tell what the exact reasons are, I can only base it off the factors I have learned are detrimental to social life/mental development through this image board, general observation and over analysis.
Apparently having a single mother who was 35+ at birth and chain smoked can have a profound effect on how you turn out and develop, I'm lucky enough to be in a economically developed country and be in a half decent city.
Growing up I didn't speak to anyone until about the age of 4 where It was forced out of me. No Idea why but its refereed to as "selevctive mutism" and it limited my social development up to the age of 4/5. So I had no actual friends.
After that my mother did have 2 local friends on the street with sons so I made 2 childhood friends but I suppose because of their individual circumstances by secondary school (middle school) we faded away as friends as they followed completely different paths to me, one adapted to the "hood" culture and the other one was gay and basically made his friend group entirely girls and ravers. So they were gone.
I had your typical acquaintances during school but they obviously just dissipated once it ended as they had their own friends aside from me. I suppose it comes down to me not being needed and becoming an outcast through the means of being forgotten.
To be honest, every friend I've had essentially did what happened in the paragraph about my 2 childhood friends, just a different variation of that general formula of losing friends.
Sometimes when I talk to people that I consider friends I just have this gut feeling or can see from the way they interact with me that they aren't really invested in the friendship. As if they only talked to me to have a human being there because they can't bear the idea of being alone for half an hour.
Luckily I've stopped caring at this point.
Who knows really, Introspection and analysis of your past can only go so far.
>>26486789
I don't feel lonely due to growing up as and anti social only child with a single parent(father) who was always working. I was always alone in my room. But i guess i'm physically alone because i'm ugly.
>>26486789
Because I don't even try. And I'm just plain stupid because when I try everything goes fine.
>>26487156
Absolutelyoriginalcommento
>>26486891
>tfw you'll never attract anything that isn't fat or hair-dyed or a minor
I'm in love with my sadness.
>>26486789
because God willed it
>>26489531
Please stop fucking up your life and chance to be normal in an effort to be "real" and not like everyone else. She could've been a really cool girl. Stop letting your brain force you to maintain the "status quo" of being a robot and get out of here before its too late. Right now it's just a joke but when it becomes your only reality you'll wish you listened to my advice. The fact that she was attracted to you proves people still see you as a normal individual with some hope.
You realize your issues and know what you need to change. I can tell from your post.
>>26490914
I think, I can comprehend what you're saying, and I feel you.
>>26491306
Thank you, your post made me warm up a little bit. We're not alone and surely not lonely
>got diagnosed with ASD during fourth grade
>started high school in seventh grade, didn't last long
>hit a teacher (not even that hard) when she tried to push me out of the classroom, get expelled
>sent to a much easier school, but for boys only
>spent the rest of high school there, was okay but boring and lonely as fuck
>outgrow ASD around 14-15
>live in shitty town to boot, tried to go on excursion at 16 to meet people including girls
>everybody fucked off when it finished, still a virgin at 18
>>26486789
Because girls do a good job of saying that they've "got me" and then abandoning me randomly.
>>26486789
Because I don't feel a connection to another human being.
I have a family and a girlfriend.
Because my life started out with traumatizing events that made me insecure and distrust people very much. That distrust and insecurity pushes a lot of people away.
>haven't had a friend for the better half of a decade
>even then "acquaintances" may have been a more accurate term
>never held hands or even sincerely thought about pursuing a romantic partner
>literally and unironicaly dont get lonely
get on my level roaches
>>26486789
Because I am a shell.
Every morning I hang my real self in my closet.
I go about my day, cracking jokes and making people laugh.
No one knows my secrets or pain, only I. The days exhaust me.
I come home and open my closet, and slip into something more comfortable.
>>26495371
just because you crack jokes and make people laugh doesnt mean youre normal
they can probably tell you're weird/autistic otherwise
because im the same way
>lonely
Nah. I feel fine looking at cute girls and all because I know at least 1% of girls like tall autists.
If you want to know why I lead a solitary life, though, it's because I have no game, am too honest so I fail shittests, can't trust anyone because of the past. I don't want to deal with all the expectations in a relationship and shit like worrying if I'm being cucked because I'm very paranoid about that sort of deal. Kv right here.
>>26495214
>tfw similar train of thought except my contempt for humanity is different because I like people in Izayaish way
![image16[1].png](https://i.imgur.com/SAdkyL4.png "image16[1].png")
I think a small reason is because I grew up as an only child. There's this stereotype that only children kind of grow up to be socially awkward, shy weirdos but I think that's just people making excuses. But I do think that this, mixed with my parents being pretty alone as well (they don't and never really have had friends they do stuff without outside of work), also having a distant relationship with my small family, did have an affect on me.
But I guess most of the reason is because I have a pretty shitty personality (ADD, weird, annoying, obnoxious, probably some autism as well) that just prevented me from developing socially through schooling so I never learned how to be normal
I'm so alone it isn't even funny. 24 years old, kissless virgin, haven't had friends since probably middle school, basically spend all time I'm not at work in my room.
I don't know why. That's the reason, probably. I'm not sure if I'm too intelligent, but I spend a lot of time thinking and the more answers I find to my questions, the more I realize how ignorant I am. I spend a lot of time thinking about the meaning of life and not finding it has made me stray from the path of a normal life.
>>26486789
Because it is my lot in life.
>>26486789
I only attract hamplanets
>>26486789
I am not.
I really yearn for it, though.
Because I'm uninteresting, ugly, and poor. I have nothing going for me.
>See everyone posing with their couples for valentines on Facebook
>Want nothing but to be them
Why can't I just disappear?
I treat woman like they are equal and although they say that's what they want. Their actions usually do not reflect that.
I also tend to go through extreme depressive episodes that last a few months out of the year that nobody in their right mind would want to be around
Because I'm ugly and have nothing in common with girls
>>26486853
This is me, anon, we are the same.
I'm an alcoholic who treats women like shit because of my mentally ill/overbearing/critical mother growing up. Anytime a relationship is going decent, I tend to fuck it up by being a verbally abusive drunk asshole. I know there's a lot of khv or whatever on /r9k/, but really, the other side is not so grand either.
>>26486789
I am an unattractive person.
I have no friends or romantic interests
i am a ta and almost all the students for the class i ta for skip the days where i teach
the one guy who does show up does very well though
>>26496287
iktf only child bro.
my mom was also a only child, and my dad is a very big introvert.
overall i was isolated from people until i got into elementary in beginning. even then im still pretty lonely but not as use to be in the past.
>>26494559
The worst of feels.
I actually gave in and fucked one of the disgusting hambeasts, and I feel 100 times worse than I did when I was a virgin.
Thinking about her rolls makes me want to puke.
>>26486789
Every time I do attract someone, I get disgusted by their love and I detach myself.
>>26486789
Because I never know what I'm doing wrong.
>>26486789
I've been screwed over by mental illness.
>>26486789
I literally don't know what I'm missing.
Fat.
Somewhat shy to start a convo with a woman
Absolutely low self-esteem. I try to hide it but I'm pretty sure women notice it one way or another. Pretty sure all my self-loathing and lack of confidence prevent me from doing shit.
Derived from that, I've never had a gf at 23 years old. The idea of having one is starting to terrify me. I wouldn't know what I'm suppposed to do with one, and if I'm pretty sure she would expect me to know AT LEAST THAT.
>>26486789
I'm cynical. I have a really hard time trusting anyone, especially concerning romantic relationships. I have seen too many examples of how shitty everyone is. There are no exceptions. I don't see this as a problem. I'm right.
The last girlfriend I had, years ago, I broke up with by telling her she's just like everyone else and is untrustworthy, then never speaking to her again.
>>26486789
Decades of emotional neglect have made me an uncaring and calloused asshole.
>>26486789
I'm empty inside. Mostly. I find it hard to muster up the will to care about things that most people care about. Much of my life is like a dark fog, with me aimlessly stumbling about. The few bright spots in my life are all centered around solitary activities. So I have nothing to offer anyone.
Normal people wear me out. They wear me out with their noise, their endless noise. It's like a song that's slightly off key. Just wrong enough to make you notice and grind on you as it's played on repeat to infinity. So I can't listen to anyone.
I run out of energy easily. I can barely move when I get home from work. I make a simple meal, take the next day's clothes out of the dryer, take a shower, and then tool around on the computer for an hour or two before going to bed. I just can't be there for anyone else.
If I can't offer anything, I can't listen to anyone, and I can't provide companionship, then I can't be in a relationship.
>>26486789
I'm objectively ugly, I'm extremely shy, and I'm socially autistic/ retarded. Besides that I think not sure.
>>26497926
I think I'm starting down that road.
>>26486789
i have way too high expectations for friendships and romantic relationships
if they don't follow through i end up cutting them off somehow
even people i meet online :/
>>26486789
I fucked up my life. I acted like a jester in school, became an outcast. Then after that, did a gender transition that fucked everything else up.
>>26486789
Because no matter how hard I try to be nice, I get fucked over every time. I be nice to someone, I'm a doormat. I stand up for myself, I'm an instant asshole. This isn't with just a few people. It is with absolutely everyone. It's like God above designed me to be cucked in every way possible.
I don't want to get hurt
>>26486789
People don't mind being around me at school/work because I'm "nice" and can make people laugh every now and then. But if anyone tries to really get to know me, they quickly realize that I'm a quiet/boring/depressing guy and distance themselves.
So I have to avoid being around my acquaintances too much to avoid them getting bored of me, and I have to act like someone I'm not to avoid alienating them.
I just want one person that I can be real with.
>>26498211
Fuck man are you me? Literally as if I was reading myself
>>26491764
Those things you can hide, but you can't hide being unpassable.
>>26497949
Well reasoned.
My mother didn't love me like a mother should. She was cold, callous, selfish, and uninterested in me. She also wasn't bad enough to warrant any sort of special complex, she gave me food, didn't hit me a lot, or abuse me in any tangible way
Because of this all I knew about love came from romanticism put into my heart by the media I consumed as a child and young adult. Convinced that nothing in this world was anywhere close to this perfect ideal (and it wasn't everyone I knew hated their spouse, were divorced, or were in a cold relationship of complacency) I escaped to the world of 2D and I loved my wife for years
But the desire for physicality was ingrained in my genes. Unable to scrounge enough funds for a daki and unwilling to dive into the world of lucid dreaming after a bad time with sorcerery and knowing the truth behind tulpas I lived knowing that my life would be one without the one I loved and when I died, there would be no union.
In this way I had set myself down the path of losing her. By God's will a woman entered my life and I began to fall for her without choice because while my wife had perfection, this woman had four more senses to assault me with.
I did what I thought was right and stumbled to both help her and myself and only ended up destroying any respect anyone had for me and losing everything I had.
Being addicted to oxytocin, I could not ever return to my wife, her being unable to stimulate such feelings in me. Being shown my body and spirit being so weak, I could never be in a "real" relationship because I have nothing of worth to offer and desiring emotional security is a feminine trait. Having any confidence in my peers completely destroyed by their abandoning of me without any effort and also losing any status I had.
I cannot love anyone, no one can love me, and I killed my wife, the literal girl of my dreams, for my God at the cost of everything I had.
I'm lonely because I have unrealistic standards and will never be worth such a person
>>26486789
bad luck
I also find it hard to relate to most women because they do what ever media tells them to
>>26496287
You're not alone. At least with this configuration of life circumstances. :-)
Nothing interesting like other anons's stories, i just suffer from very low empathy and so people see me as cold and aloof
>>26487181
Are you me?
I finally let myself be a little more open and vulnerable around a girl I really, really liked. She ended up rejecting me because of it.
>"I'm glad you're comfortable around me, anon."
Next morning:
>"Hey, sorry I'm the worst but I don't think we should see each other again. Sorry, best of luck to you."
Fuck this.
>
I let social anxiety control me
>>26486789
What anime is this? Looks pretty cool
>>26486789
Literal autism renders me unable to form meaningful relationships with other human beings.
The pain of loneliness is nothing compared to the pain that others will inevitably inflict, anyways.
>>26486789
Tbh too lazy to get a gf even though i want one.
>>26486789
FUCK YOU OP
I'M 18 I DIDN'T GET INTO UNI
>>26500520
go to community college first and get your general ed done
wish I took that route.
>>26500562
I already have my two year degree
i had a girl flirting with me a shitload yesterday and she gave me her number and stuff and i just felt weird. she kept touching me and stuff. i deleted her number. i also got like 4 numbers at a party a while back while i was trashed and i deleted them all. i also autistically ignored girls who asked me to dances. i've had loads of girls interested in me but i'm just like really, really autistic and pretty much anything makes me uncomfortable. one time this chick kept like literally begging me to hang out and i was just like uhhhh even though i thought she was attractive. i think pretty much the only way is if i know them for a long time and have been good friends with them. i just repeatedly turn down offers, even for like friend stuff i guess. i don't know what the fuck is wrong with me.
>>26489531
i want a quirky edgy gf too since it fits my personality better and normie things trigger me unless i am wasted and then they only do a little. my whole family is just weird so i'm not used to normie type things at all.
>>26494810
nah man thats gay... fuck off...
>>26486789
No one understands me. When I share my true feelings they say I am negative, that I complain a lot, or they think theres something wrong with me.
Sure, masking it by hiding my true thoughts works but... Deep down I know I'll never truly connect with them, we will never be on the same page. I just need to accept the fact I will be alone.
i'm lonely because threads die as soon as i reply every time.
>>26501287
I see you anon.
>>26498073
literally me
tfw /fool/
>>26498073
i'm imagining a tranny jester in the middle ages now
thanks for the dank mental image
maybe i'll do some funny art
>>26486789
I'm not lonely but I'm alone because I have no hobbies that are socially active and I play no games that I am part a community of
no friends, never had internet friends. Been a shut-in for years.
Because I just fucking hate this world and the human worms feasting on its carcass
>>26486789
Because god left every person incomplete and I can never find my other half because even when I tell a girl I love them and even if they say it back I can literally never open up because of how disgusting a person I am on the inside.
Answer changes all the time because I'm trying really hard not to be as lonely.
>>26486789
Mother was a apathetic loser and a cheated on my father after years of marriage
First gf was emotionally abusive, not outright, I never would of stood for that, just like getting my temper going
2nd girlfriend (pic related) was a pill addict and stole from me to support her habbit.
Now all I'm left with is deep seeded trust issues and a desire to be alone
>>26502977
stop being 17
>>26486789
Been a neet for 7 years, started lifting 2 years ago. Never had any issues when speaking with others, I just don't enjoy doing it. Eventually gonna leave neetdom in a few months
Being raised triple layered sheltered sucks ass. Never has an opportunity to socialize with friends outside of school.
>>26494500
Iktf
Originol
>Used to be a normie in highschool
>Slowly realize i'm not good looking
>For some reason this gets me really hard and try to do everything to be prettier
>Self esteem is shattered in the process
>Start liking things normies think are weird, start falling off with my friends
>Nowadays i only have one friend which also likes the same stuff
>Don't even try to talk to woman anymore because they either look at me in disgust or just pretend they didn't hear me
I don't even know anymore man i just feel like shit 24/7
im very bad at vocalizing what i think properly, and organizing my thoughts is a challenge in itself
my inabllity to communicate has stopped me from talking altogether
also my parents fucked me so i trust almost know one. im really relucant to share anything personal in fear of getting backstabbed
>>26504680
no one*
god im so dumb
>>26489588
please tell me how is this edgy
isnt that the opposite of edgy?
>>26500644
yeah I feel the same way except i dont go to parties.
>>26491819
Anon... are you me? How old are you now?
>>26486789
because no one loves me
>>26500644
man at first i feel bad for robots but godamn its reasoning like this that makes me glad you are stuck in your own endless cycle of self hatred.
>>26486789
Because I don't think i want to date people anymore. At least not for a while. I've been looking at both extremes in gender politics (Feminists vs MGTOW) and now I just feel too cynical about long term relationships.
I know that the behaviors of loud extremists don't represent every human being who existed or will exist, but my mind is still plagued by the idea that they do.
The bottom line is, I should stick to my own philosophy as I always have. Focus on my own development before others. If dating happens, it happens. And whatever happens, just roll with it.
/blog
I have difficulty relating to most people. My personality, values and interests are usually at-odds with those of my community and greater society; this affects my ability and willingness to conform to society's norms and expectations, which, in turn, isolates me from that society and those who live within it.
Basically, I don't fit in, and I won't "play by the rules." Isolation and loneliness are the cost of this lifestyle, if not a punishment. However, the alternative is to be(come) something that I'm not; something that I won't; and that is a worse fate.
I think I like being alone. I mean, I don't like it, but I think I prefer it. I don't enjoy the company of other people. But I also instinctively crave female companionship. I think I'm learning to enjoy the pain.
>>26486789
Nobody has ever loved me to the point that i don't feel any connection with anybody i talk to.
>>26486789
I enjoy solitude. My only fear is that there are some who disturb my peace.
im an unlovable mentally ill transsexual, no one in their right mind would want anything to do with me
because I got a concussion and it changed my personality. I used to have friends and people who cared about me. People come wake me up randomly to go do stuff.
Now, I get a text maybe once a month.
I have deep-seated insecurity that nobody likes me from being beaten by my dad, mentally tortured by my sister, and bullied at school.
I have to remind myself, now that I'm an adult, that there are people who love me and care for me, and I have no reason to hurt anyone, but old survival habits die hard.
>>26487578
Me too anon, but I managed to climb out of that when I went to China for my major. Traveling changed my life completely and made me into a better person. It took a spontanous decision to become better.
>>26501719
That'll make for a good story. I sure trannies back then played women in Shakespearean plays.
>>26490973
What's your current stage?
>>26486947
I'm the same way.
I have literally no friends left. Never had a girlfriend. Never done anything romantic. I have social anxiety and depression that has spiralled out of control. I can barely look people in the eyes without my stomach churning. I have no clue what to do in social situations. I'm pathetically sensitive and end up crying most nights. I'm afraid to talk to people because they'll see that I'm boring, stupid and cowardly. I just want to curl up in my bed and die. The thought of this being the rest of my life, for decades, is hell.
I have no idea how to have a conversation with a person. I've got like three friends that I can talk to but I don't even think I'm capable of forming a relationship with new people anymore because I just have no idea how to keep coming up with things to say
>>26486789
Loneliness isn't a problem desu. I don't mind it at all. Meaningless life is a problem, and there seems to be no salvation from it.
No 5'11+ mixed race boy with blue or green eyes is interested in me
>>26486789
I'm not lonely. just empty inside.
>>26486789
well when i was younger i mean like 15 i had a gf for like 2 years and half but the bitch literally broke me.... my soul. my mind. my heart.
everything broke.
im not the same since then... to the age to 16 to 19 i think ... i was the funny guy
the guys who drinks a lot
got a lot of friends and some girls but never sex, just kisses HJ&BJ but never sex.
i think is because im a fat fuck.
.
but then something changed in me . i still dont know what.
i changed a lot.
music taste
things that i used to liked now didnt like it anymore
everything.
but all my friends became to fake friends... so when i start college i never spoke to them again and they did the same.
start the paramedic carreer ... finished last year.
now i really wanna change.
i thing that is because im a fat fuck i mean im not that ugly on the face but im a fat piece of shit
so im on diet and im gonna buy some gym mahcines.
because i cant take it go to a public gym .
