>Want to hear the one about the femanon?Never mind, she'll tell you herself.
>What does a femanon call unlubricated anal rape after being slapped and choked?Foreplay.
>Why did the femanon join the army?"ATTENTION!"
>How do you make a femanon fall in love with you?Not by spamming her with replies, you whiteknighting betacuck.
>What's a femanon's favourite drink?Vodka martini with a handful of painkillers.
I'm just kidding...It's a Sex on the Beach with Chad.
But enough about femanons, how are you wagies doing tonight? You know, I was recently accused of being lazy by a wagecuck. The nerve of that guy! I said to him,"Me lazy?! You don't even start the day till 5pm!"
Yeah, wagecucks can be pretty rude. The other day, for example, I was walking down the street and I asked some wagie, "Excuse me, have you got the time?" He just looked at me confused and kept walking. Then it hit me...Wagecucks don't have any time!
>Apparently BMW have had to recall their limited edition 'wagecuck' line of cars...It turns out many of them didn't even have brakes.
>What's the difference between an /r9k/ robot and an actual robot?One has no real self-awareness and is incapable of proper human interaction. The other is a robot.
>>26394276
kek nice jokes
too bad i'm actually a wageslave, and don't own a bmw
>Apparently BMW have had to recall their limited edition 'wagecuck' line of cars...
>It turns out many of them didn't even have brakes.
neet comedian does it again! Literally the bane of wagecucks and fembots alike.
>>26394276
Wooooohoooo! THIS GUY IS A RIOT!
>>26394276
>ATTENTION!
Lost it right there
Who doesn't like attention. Everyone desires attention. You wanting a girlfriend is for attention.
One of these days a butthurt Wagie or Femanon is gonna call the cops on this Neet Comedy Club (NCC) and have it shut down for promoting hate-speech.
>>26394548
no him, i mean us males, we want a gf for companionship....
>>26394548
No... I want a GF for sex.
>>26394585
Companionship is a form of attention
>>26394276
you are my favorite moment of the day
>>26394276
>>How do you make a femanon fall in love with you?
>Not by spamming her with replies, you whiteknighting betacuck.
LOOKING AT YOU, DOJ
>>26394276
Hey, you're pretty good at this. Can we get you booked?
>>26394564
if you can't take the bantz you shouldn't be here.... i'm a wageslave, kv level 23 aspiring wiz, and i still laughed.
BMW owning wagie here. Feels good man. Good jokes too, actually pretty funny tbqhf
>>26394276
>>What does a femanon call unlubricated anal rape after being slapped and choked?
>Foreplay.
Hahahaha this is literally true I love hitting girls in bed
>>26394276
>That first joke.
>>26394612
ATTENTION
the act or power of carefully thinking about, listening to, or watching :someone or something
: notice, interest, or awareness
: special care or treatment
yeah and i hate myself for being subjected to the voice and curves of a women with all my powers.... that's why i don't hate women i hate myself....
>>26394276
Thisone is my favourite:."You don't even start the day till 5pm!"
>>26394712
>>>>>/elsewhere/
God damn. NEET stand-up comedy is meme of the year already
>>26394400
He might be funny anon but he isn't a big guy for them.
BOO! Get off the stage!
>>26394591
yeah this
females never understand men
but they always think they do
>>26394276
>'wagecuck' cars recalled
>No brakes
You fucking madman. You've done it again.
>>26394548
Fuck off roastie, you live for it
>>26394548
>Guys want girls for attention
>Not sex
>Attention
What
>>26394548
No it's for blowjobs
>>26394276
>>What does a femanon call unlubricated anal rape after being slapped and choked?
>Foreplay.
L
M
A
O
>What do you call someone with no life skills, no future, and an empty inbox on okcupid?a single mother
>barbie dolls, a night light, and a hymen.name three things femanon threw away when she turned twelve
How can you turn a roastie into a saint?make her raise a mulatto child by herself
>>26394400
dubs confirm best joke
>>26394276
>>Why did the femanon join the army?
>"ATTENTION!"
This got me most, but they're all good.
Got any about part time wagecucks such as myself?
Thank you, attention whores and gentleman!
>>26394548
I get where you're coming from, I do! I think the point you're trying to make is"girl here btw"
>>26395334
You don't like my jokes, wagie? Sorry, I guess unlike youthey don't work all the time.
>>26396316
>Why did the wagie go part time?
All the full time NEET vacancies were taken.
I'll throw a couple more into tomorrow's show, just for you.
>>26396643
>tfw you heckle NEET comedian just to hear his put downs
>>26396643
Holy fuck
This thread is great
Dunno if this took you a long time to get these jokes but goddamn I love r9k people
I'm also a part time wagie, I fucking hate it. Having to work because senpai would kick me out if I didn't...
Hate that word. WORK WORK WORK
Just WORK
Gotta WORK
>>26394276
As a wageslave i like these threads. Any chance you'd start letting us into your comedy club at a discount since we chip in for the NEETbux?
>>26394276
Best thread on r9k in a while.
>>26394591
And thats why you will never have one
>>26396643
S A V A G E
A
V
A
G
E
Woooohoooo!
>>26394276
>You don't even start the day till 5pm!
#SHOTSFIRED
>>26396643
>I get where you're coming from I do! I think the point you're trying to make is "girl here btw"
B R U T A L
Ayyyeeee. God, i hate women.
>>26395863
Underrated.
Wagies BTFO
>>26394276
>"Me lazy?! You don't even start the day till 5pm!"
Damn
>>26396643
NO CHILL
O
C
H
I
L
L
>>26396643
>You don't like my jokes, wagie? Sorry, I guess unlike you they don't work all the time.
This was fucking savage.
>>26394276
haha.. the fact that you have the pepe image makes it even more humorous...
NO JOKE / SARCASM...
8.5/10
>>26396643
>attention whores and gentlemen
Looks like somebody's on a riot tonight!
Also, dealing with hecklers like a boss once again. Drinks are on me once you're done with your set based Neet-man.
>>26396643
>You don't like my jokes, wagie? Sorry, I guess unlike you they don't work all the time.
How can one sperg be so based?
>no money
>need to become a wageslave
>every interview is disastrous
>even at fucking fast food joints
How many failures do I have to go through to apply for NEETbux? I fall flat on my face whenever it comes to questions about my teamwork skills, I can't give specific examples of when I was a good team player.
>>26397805
Really shit jobs don't even have proper interviews
Get a job in a warehouse if you're that desperate
>>26394276
>comfy pepe is now doing stand up comedy shows
has comfy posting gone too far lads?
>>26398062
Not far enough
>>26397550
I'm not sure if this is critcism or praise
>>26397805
Lie man, that's how I got my first job to end my miserable 2 years of neetdom. Most places depending one where you're applying don't even check references so you could just say you worked with another company before.
>>26394276
Quality kek.
Good job, anon.
>>26395863
KEK
ORIGIANLA CODME,M
I'm considering driving to an open mic where nobody knows me and telling these jokes and then rushing out the door.
Dragging your ass up and down shithole comedy clubs for money sounds an awful lot like work, Pepe...
>>26396643
Kek, nice one way better than those >tfw no gf, britfeel, r8 me ect
>>26398597
Not sure people will follow you if you say wagecuck and fembots.
Why have you started on femanons and janitors?
I feel like I'm reading an Amy Schumer comedy routine.
>>26399084
femanon jokes are the best
