ITT: Worst lifetime injury
Here's mine.
>5th grade after school
>hanging with my 2 best friends Tall black one, and weird mexijew one
>Dick and Cunt respectively
>Cunt has the great idea of pretend wrestling, since that was relevant
>Dick calls him self X-Dick, cunt is Powerman
>They run at me so I drop my backpack and X-dick picks me up and slams me
>Powerman charges and then tackles X-dick to the ground and the mass falls on top of me
>Ow fuck
>They start thrashing like a beached swordfish
>They run off, and I'm struggling to get up
>Walk off to the afterschool area and then play soccer in pain for 30 minutes
>Come back to school a month later, surgery, sling, scars and all
>X-Dick doesn't say sorry
>Powerman avoids talking about it
Shattered my collarbone, 4 fractures.
What're your stories /r9k/?
>>26222546
>on some trip with a youth group
>play volleyball on the beach with some other kids
>pretty close to the water
>ball comes at me
>I got this bitch
>jump backwards and slam the fuck out of this ball
>land again and notice that I am in water
>landed with the feet on rough terrain full of stones
>big toe feels weird
>pull leg up
>sliced quarter of my nail off and bleed pretty hard
>ignore it and play on in the sand
>come back to camp
>toe hurts really fucking bad
>gonna heal up by tommorow
>it doesnt
>whole toe is swollen as fuck
>stinks like rotten meat already
>being the retard I am I do not ask for desinfectants
>just pull out my deodorant and spray it straight into the wound
>the fucking pain haunts me to this day
>wash out my foot
>finally get a dandage and disinfectants
>nurse it up as well as I can
>limp through the rest of the trip
Had to get a surgery afterwards (twice) because the infection spread so far. Still have my toe though.
>>26222546
I had a seizure cleaning up a cut down tree and fell on a pitchfork. It stuck me in the chin and somehow broke my jaw in three places. Week+ in the hospital and a couple months jaw wired shut. Had to take the wires out myself.
>>26222546
Got into a fight.
Someone threw a brick onto my fucking head.
Hit me on the forehead an inch above my eye.
3 stitches. Didn't even pass out.
I was pretty lucky. I could have easily lost a few teeth or my nose, go blind or even die.
>>26223120
>didn't even pass out
We're you 9? If not, not really impressed you didn't pass out
>>26223069
>Sprays deoderant on an open wound.
Holy shit anon I am dying thanks for posting.
>>26223146
I mean I didn't pass out when a flying brick stopped on my head, you fucking dumbass.
>tossing a ball with friends on the boardwalk when I was younger
>heavy set friend tackles me when I catch the ball
>shoulder lands right on the concrete where the TramCars drive
>angular fracture to my collarbone
basically looked like a triangle afterwords
>be 17, hanging out with best (read: only) bro in Brooklyn
>we stumble across this bottle depository, decide to steal a bag and sell it for like 20 bucks
>we grab a bag no problem, but when it comes time to hop the fence back out I go full retard
>decide to do it smoothly like an action hero, go up and over without thinking
>in the half second it takes me to fall I realize I'm heading towards the lip of a garbage container (like a dumpster but wider and topless) balls-first
>instinctively put my knee up to protect my future children (I was still optimistic at this point)
>land with all my weight on my kneecap hitting the lip of the container
>no pain, but ten minutes later I can barely walk, ten after that and it hurts so bad I feel like throwing up--this awful pain in the pit of my stomach that won't go away
>my friend thinks I'm fucking with him and keeps joking around
>we wind up giving the bag to a homeless guy and I tell my friend to fuck off so I can ice my knee
Turns out I chipped a piece of my kneecap right off and it happened to have two tendons connected to it. Shit sucked. It reattached itself to the rest of my knee after a few weeks of physical therapy but I still can't put too much weight on it, three years later.
Can't even imagine getting kneecapped with a gun, holy fuck.
>>26223244
shit. knee problems are a real pain in the ass.
go full skeletal mode (ie lose weight) and exercise all muscles that control and position the kneecap.
are you still doing physical therapy?
>shot in the arm
>muscle damaged
>feel pain constantly now
>doctors say it won't ever go away
Chronic pain a shit
>>26223419
How did you manage to get shot?
Broken arm. Literally fractured every single bone, my hand was flailing. It happened during a practice taekwondo match. Never felt any pain. Not when it happened and never after it happened. Breaking bones is odd.
>Be 6
>In grandma's backyard where there is this big tree
>Want a fat branch to build a shack
>Think that if i throw a good stone a it, it will break
>Decide to use this triangular stone that was used to hold the door when someone wanted to park their car
Must've been 1 or so kg. As a child this seemed enough
>Get right under the branch
>Throw the stone with all my might
>Of course not high enough
I still don't know how to explain what follows as I wasn't especially retarded for a 6 years old
>Just stay right under where i threw that stone while just thinking : fuck not high enough
>Obviously the stone end up falling
>Right on the head
At first like >>26223069 I thought it was gonna get better with time but when my grandmother saw that my hands (I thought it was like a bump so I just massaged it) drenched in blood she called my parents
Got something like 3 small stitches I think
Can still see it since I have short hair
>>26222546
>Edward King