How do I get a girlfriend, /r9k/?
All these years I've thought I didn't need one, but I just want to hold a girl. I'm tired of being alone, I just want a qt to hold.
You've got to learn to love yourself before anyone can love you.
You've just got to have confidence.
Be yourself.
Just go up to her and talk to her.
Its all about confidence. You have non? Fake it. Thats the best tip I've ever gotten and it worked and I got a gf now. I faked being confident by learning body language and chaos magick. Learn to have conversations by nouning. Look it uo
>>26208222
Confidence and being yourself
Girl here,
I'm tired of you thirsty betas complaining about not getting pussy. It's a real turn off. I'm considered a very direct woman, so let me give you these crucial steps to at least get a 6/10
>Be attractive
Now being attractive isn't everything, but if you don't at least 8/10 looks, women will not even pay attention to you. Take care of your face and work out. If you're still ugly, get surgery or settle for some landwhale
>Be rich
The bare minimum is exactly $100, 000 a year. That's the economy for you. Just the way it is. We want to be taken cared of. Even you do get a girl, she'll just leave you for the next rich alpha
>Social status
Chicks love it when you have connections & actually know how to talk to human beings. Not lonely social autist that can't even say two things to anyone. Having connections can come in handy in the future & doesn't hurt to be a person lots of people know.
>Afford a good car
All we want is to driven in a car that's not shitty. Just get a $50K car. It's not too much to ask for. Oh, if you can't drive, consider suicide.
>Be tall
HOLY SHIT PLEASE BE TALL!
Why would a girl want to go out with a manlet? Theres plenty of tall men for us you are not even worth the competition
>have big dick
Yup, size DOES matter. The whole "ocean" thing is bullshit. This is why we let black men do us.
>Don't be a virgin
Virgins are disgusting! They should be condemned to death. How are you still a virgin? Girls don't ask for much you know.
>Get rid of your pathetic interests
No more vidya, comics, anime weeabo shit, no porn, no more cartoons, MLP, and stop coming to this stupid Filipino image board. You're grown ass men, act like it.
>Be an asshole
We don't show it, but we love to be treated like stupid children. Why do you think women would stay with their abusive cheating boyfriends? But hey, if you're really nice, maybe we'll let you be our official orbiter.
That's it. It's easy if you ask me.
Don't forget -- Just be yourself :)
>>26208222
When was the last time you spoke with a girl around your age in a non-business encounter?
>>26208287
>>26208409
>>26208487
>It's all about confidence bro. I did it and it worked out for me
>>26208489
> implying a germy roasty is actually worth all that effort
OP, just wait for VR and get a 2d
>>26208489
Believed it until
>Be rich
>>26208489
I know this is a troll, but sometimes I feel like I need to be this good to get anywhere.
>>26208489
It's funny because it's supposed to be satire
But it's actually pretty much a normal list of requirements for women
>>26208701
>Implying girls want to be around a poor sappy loser
Get off your ass, loser. You can't provide with Neetbux
>>26208800
Dubs don't lieIt's still bait
