Have you ever wondered how badly you pissed off some deity in order to end up the way you are today?
At least we can all be lonely in hell together
when i'm asked why i believe in god, my first response is always:
"because SOMEONE is obviously fucking with me."
>>26123386
We'll all gurgle in mud together.
>>26123352
Every day, anon. Everyday
>mother gets cancer as I just start college, 17
>drop out after two terms so I can take care of her
>she gets a double mastectomy on my 18th birthday
>for the last month I've been bathing her and washing her hair and feeding her and running a house by myself
>while my deadbeat dad lives happily with his second family
>he's rich while we're struggling, mum has taken off work due to her illness
>dad refuses to help, but texts me and says "me and your sisters are here for you :^)"
>i've never met my sisters and when i tried to call my dad once, they picked up the phone and told me i was a mistake and that i should kill myself
>stub my baby toe so hard this morning the nail came out
>looked up and screamed WHY as hard as i could
Yeah OP I do think that sometimes
>>26123684
forgot to add
>yesterday she went to her surgeons for a post surgery checkup
>they didn't get all the cancer
>it spread through her lymphnodes and now it's in her blood
>it can be anywhere in her body
>it's a the simulacra think they're people episode
>>26123684
Just find someone to fatten you up kiddo
>>26123684
>>26123722
>born ugly
>born in poverty
>born from mentally ill unstable mother
>go sometimes a day or two without food from age 4-9 and get malnurished to the point when I started get enough food at 9 I gained 20 points in 2 months.
>women told me all the time I was ugly in school and crushed my self confidence and self esteem
>watch porn as a way to release sexual energy
>become porn addict
>live off food stamps and welfare from my dad
>step mother emotionally abuses me growing up
>Become christian
>struggle with porn addiction and unable to get girlfriend because of ugly face
>face severe depression and anxiety because of the confliction
>father dies at 18
>move 2000 miles by myself to a border state where dangerous crack heads and tweakers roam the streets
>try to find a job, first one was telemarketer where I worked there for 2 weeks and never got paid
>live alone, off of 1100 dollars a month
>no parents, no help
Life is horrible for me. I'm certain God hated my family and is punishing me for the sins of my ancestors/family in which I don't know because they disowned my mother.
>>26123813
eh? like, take care of me?
i dunno man i feel pretty unloveable
>>26123684
You need to kill your dad, Anon. You can't let him get away with that. You HAVE to show them who is in control. Nothing is stopping you, so do the right thing. We believe in you, Anon. :)
>>26123352
I don't believe in God but if there were one I suppose I'd thank him for sticking me in this mediocre purgatory than total pain and suffering within a third world hell.
>>26123862
i'd say hell is better than purgatory because at least in hell everyone else is suffering too
>>26123825
hey i'm the cancer kid, my mom was like that pre-cancer, i feel it.
except her substance was wine, she was a drunk who would get me out of bed at 2AM and punch me in the face, she'd wake up with my grandpa's rosary beads clenched in her hands.
the only thing i can say for you man is that the only way to go is up now, right
>>26123890
Strange outlook but it's your opinion, I guess.
>>26123842
If you have any form of a third party in your life grasp to it as tight as you can
Your in college
you were going to have to leave your parents at some point.
>2016
>believing in false gods
arik tree'ac te kek
>>26123949
you're not wrong, thanks manI'm not ready for all this, I'm still a child
>>26123842
no anon
you actually need to get fat
>>26123825
enter a life of crime and either accept your new found persona as Jesus-Uglyface or get plastic surgery with your drug money
>>26123352
Honey, all the time.
I think I got too sassy or something and have been in an unfathomably long struggle of mental dominance with some higher being or deity.
With no memory of the prior engagement, i'm locked into an antagonistic path of fate.
Not just in destiny, but in thought and mind.
I can't have a single thought to myself without asking why I think it, and arguing my own ideas into the atomic structure of the very concept.
I would say it's an ineffable tragedy i'll never fully and truly articulate, but I suppose I just tried.
It's only recently that i've truly stomached that someday I have to kill myself. And the day is coming soon and fast.
But also at the same time, if this.. Thing that's plaguing me is real. Perhaps there is some worse punishment for taking my own life, not unlike some void of warranty.
I wish I could just die by happenstance in a way i'm comfortable with.
Beggars can't be choosers.
I suppose i'm just waiting then.
>>26123684
>for the last month I've been bathing her and washing her hair
how old is she
does she have fat titties?
My soul is one that would have defied a God regardless of the punishment,
Maybe I had true love in one life in exchange for a thousand lives of loneliness, must have been worth it
I probably cucked one. Then I must've acted all smug and told it something like "condemn me for a lifetime of not getting laid, like I give a fuck".
