>be me
>got a job interview for shitty work in super market
>"please anon, hand me your resume"
>starts reading
>looks disappointed
>"you're 30 anon and you dont have a single job experience? just a high school diploma"
>get my shit and walk away
how was you day r9k?
>>25724331
>resume
what type of job was it pham?
>>25724354
>shitty work in super market
here where i live you gotta have a resume to be hired fist in supermarkets
Sorry anon, you don't have enough experience to obtain this experience.
>>25724331
Lol you've never worked anywhere? How have you survived this long man
>>25724331
>need job experience to get job
>cant get job without job experience
then what the fuck do you want me to do
Make stuff up next time
>>25724400
Should have applied as a hired foot than
>>25724596
do you think if i lied about graduating highschool they would know? there's no way they would actually check right?
Why didn't you take the time to explain your severe autism and N33tlyfe to the hiring manager?
Surely if they understood that you chose to not work because it was economically more viable for you to live off autismbux for the last 14 years they would see that you aren't some failure in life. Perhaps they would be able to get your plight to enter the wagecvck ranks and give you some work to do.
>>25724573
By not wanting one. Also having parents who aren't y too strict will help.
guys a friend wants to help me out with a job but i'm embarrassed to give him my resume. what do i write in the time periods where i did nothing?
>>25724615
I can practically guarantee you they wouldn't. Wasn't there some high-ranking businessman who lied about being a CS major years and years ago? He got away with that shit for decades, and this is a supermarket job. You'll be fine, bro.
>>25724654
Write that you have been around the world. Doing small jobs in restaurant and other stuff like that to finance. Sounds alpha and mostly no one can trace if you actually worked in a restaurant in some shit tier country
>>25724331
That's why, as a 30yo neet with no job experience, I'm going to make money off the internet or die trying. I have no choice left.
You have to have confidence in your lie. Don't look shifty when they ask you about past experience.
Lie.
If they actually check (I've never heard of them checking) and find out you're lying just shrug it off and move on to the next one.
AUTISM
U
T
I
S
M
Also 25 and never worked, feels good man.
too many people and not enough jobs so employers can be as picky as they want
>>25724331
I was unemployed for 5 months and they ask me on interview why I don't get any job so long...
But at least I get nice job as train machinist helper and so I can become full train machinist after 1 and half year. It's perfect job for fat autists guy like me.
>>25724885
if you are in any kind of creative field just say personal projects
chances are you will have to show them though
>>25724885
How's a train conductor as a career?
I was thinking of going to get a job stocking shelves at night, and I don't even have a high school diploma or GED, and I imagined I'd just walk in without any plans and just tell the guy I want him to give me money to do a job.
give them the honest explanation.
>you need experience for experience
>tfw 25 and no experience
>tfw now too depressed to even get up off of bed, lost all my gym gains
>got arthritis on my knee
>at this rate I'll need a knee replacement at 35
>be unwilling NEET
>applying for places and getting no replies
>no relevant experience for what I want to get into
>recruitment agency finds me some temp work
>it's legal support - i.e. the post room in a legal firm
>the pay's a bit above minimum wage, but it's pretty easy work and the people are alright
>manager asks me what I'm trying to do long-term
>I tell him (accounting)
>comes back the next day and tells me he set up a 'chat' with one of the managers in the finance department
>he's pretty sure they don't have any positions open, but still useful
>go to the chat
>they talk about the structure of the department for a bit, and then pretty much offer me a temp job there until the end of jan, since someone in the department got in a car crash
>started the monday after
>that was in december
>got told last friday that they want to extend my contract until the end of april, and employ me directly, so I'd be paid more
>has suggested in team meetings that they might have to permanently hire more people, which I'd presumably be first in line for given that I've learned half the stuff they do and get on with them great
My advice is to stop trying, because it's all down to luck. And I only got this job, and the contract extension, because someone got a brain injury in a car crash and is taking ages to recover, so it can also be other people's bad luck that gets you in.
>tfw never interviewed
>tfw all the people who said "Just keep applying, you'll get something eventually" are still wrong
>tfw somehow got in through connections, despite not really having any
>>25724641
In my experience, they actually expect you to have wanted to go out and work, whether you needed money or not (like when you were a teenager).
>>25724331
Why did you put your age on your resume?
>>25725718
Are you retarded or have you never filled out a job application?
>>25725817
But the OP literally says "hand me your resume".
I can see why you might have to put your age into an online application, but there's no need to put it on your resume.
>>25725817
it's illegal to ask for age when hiring
>open door
>"You hirin?"
"get job
It's THAT easy (if you want to work in fast food).
>>25725989
This Pepe fits very well with your post. Well done anon, have a rare.
>>25724331
if you really wanted the job, you would have needed to offer some kind of explanation
specifically you need to express your remorse for having lived an indolent life, and talk about how you need someone to give you a chance to make a change, promise you'll work hard
etc
>>25725036
If it's a chain of any sort he'll make you go through the hiring process like everyone else. Also don't just walk up and go "m'lady, I'd like to echange my services for pay" cause that's weird and who wants to hire and work with a weirdo
>>25725989
Around where I live all fast food places will say they are not hiring but you can fill out an application on line. Or they always leave a sign up that says they're hiring and will tell you to go home and full out an app even if they know they don't need people... Fast food jobs suck a dick anyway, best entry level jobs are in manufacturing things... Hell if you're smart and train well you'll be a star at any factory
>wake up
>shitpost
>go to the skatepark for a bit
>come home and write lewd post
>>25726439
Do you feed the pigeons, and sometimes feed the sparrers too? Does it give you a sense of enormous well being?NEETLIFE?
>>25724574
Not wait until you're 30 to start finding a job when you didn't even go to college.
bumping for no hope
>>25725989
>you hiring
>fill out the application online or by phone (wtf)
>go back home and do so
>never get called back
>repeat infinitely
>>25725078
Trust me, don't do this
>finish college (pharmacy program) one year in june
>get an interview almost weekly but don't get the jobs
>mostly because either no experience (in pharmacy you're pretty much useless with no experience) when other experienced people applied or tanked the interview from being nervous
>october comes
>go to this one interview
>asian lady going through my resume
>"WHAT have you been DOING for FOUR MONTHS??!!"
>say thanks and leave the room
>tfw some people on here have been out of work for years
story continues if anyone cares
>finally got hired at this beyond shitty hole in the wall pharmacy
>then got hired at a hospital making baller dollars
>often see postings made by the mean asian lady pharmacy
>hear they can't keep employees longer than 6 months and no one will work there
>laugh
>tfw got discouraged
>tfw just want to die
>no job and my parents are telling me to get one
>go to place,apply,say they will call
>repeat
>no friends
>never a gf
>25 years old
>see vibrant 19 yearolds working and joking around at the store
>It's deflating knowing that they have their futures planned out and I'm wasting away
>too much apathy to do anything
>too exhausted
>>25725600
Pretty comfy life you got yourself there anon.
>>25725078
I have a job and I can tell you right now to never "be honest' in your interview
here's the secret to getting a job: lie. Everyone does it. Just lie about your accomplishments and what you've been up to for the past decade. It works better than telling the truth and honestly I think employers expect you to embellish your credentials
>>25728167
>say thanks and leave the room
I wish I wasn't too awkward and beta to do this.
>>hear they can't keep employees longer than 6 months and no one will work there
>been a NEET for ages, desperate for a job
>get a call from a recruitment agency, about a job
>sounds good, pretty much what I'm trying to get into
>"In terms of salary, the company was looking at 13-15k (GBP), depending on experience"
>laugh out loud
>tell her not to put me forward
I may be a hopeless NEET, but I have enough pride not to accept minimum wage for a job that is not minimum-wage level. I hope they didn't find anyone, because that was almost insulting.
And they would never find someone with experience for 15k, that person could easily get much more with the same experience.
>>25728238
I have been quite lucky job-wise in the last month and a half. I'd be happy to work here for years, assuming it hasn't all been some massive ruse to draw me in all this time.
Still rarely see friends or go out though, and no gf.
>Walked in and applied
>Got the job
Feels good.
>>25728374
We're all gonna make it anon. GFs and family lives and grown upness awaits us.
>>25724331
Honestly when you're talking about a shitty job like that, just lie. Make up stuff. Find companies that went out of business years ago and just say you worked there.
tell him you've been out of work the past couple of years but you worked from age 18-27, and got shafted by the bad job market.
Problem solved
Just remember honesty is for suckers.
>>25728431
I-I'll suddenly snap into becoming a normal person?
When do I get my gf?
Not sure if OP is legit or here just to trigger robots into hyperventilation / a panic attack.
>just graduated, applying for jobs in my field (meh-tier IT)
>underqualified for literally everything
>okay, that sucks, but maybe I can find an internship somewhere
>must be pursuing a masters degree
Today I genuinely considered suicide for the first time in a while.
>>25728611
Remember that employers are just as picky as women. You need to be job-Chad to get in.
They all ask for high-calibre candidates, despite many of them being medium-sized, local businesses that you've never heard of, because the job market is so bad that they actually got one once and now think that that's the kind of employee they can normally get.
>3pm
>wake up to the phone ringing
>unknown number
>"hello who the fuck"
>"hey anon it's c, do you have a pocket scale?"
>"sure bro"
>a dude I've barely know comes home with a friend
>I buy some weed from them
>we smoke a joint
>they leave
>I watch Arsenal vs Liverpool blazed eating chips
Feels normie man. It's the half of my day now. I gotta print a paper sheet and give it to my mother so she can fill it, then I'm going to sleep cause I have some procedures tomorrow.
>>25728648
>You need to be job-Chad to get in.
kek I guess so.
Well I guess I'll rip my degree in half when it finally arrives in the mail and just resign myself to driving a forklift or something for the rest of my life.
>>25728648
Also they won't even consider you below a certain level, even if they'd be perfectly happy with you if their expectations weren't so high.
>>25728723
m8, this isn't britfeel
>>25724331
How can you be thirty and getting your first job? What have you been doing for the past decade?
>Yes, I focused on studying [something], doing [something else] and taking care of family [someone]
Anon it's not hard, not like they'll want you to do something meaningful for a fucking supermarket retail job.
>>25728799
not OP but it's called being a NEET
>>25728335
Anon, you're aware it's way better to do not-minimum-wage kind of job for minimum wage than minimum-wage kind of job for minimum wage? I mean mate, at least it'll add something to your resume.
>>25728832
For some reason this reminds me of those comics from a few years ago
>What's all this noise up here? You being lazy again?
>No, dad, it's called being a NEET. It's a conscious choice to opt out of consumerist society. Watch for a second.
>*YAAAAWWWWWWNNNNN* Oh, morning wagecuck!
> bought into the medicine meme
> medschool graduate in October
> applied to several places
> call people I know who work there and ask them what's up
> "oh don't worry anon you know it's December-January the hiring guys are in vacation you know xD they'll call you breh fo sho xpxp"
> still no call
>>25728906
Nah, actual minimum wage jobs use far less brainpower. I don't want to have to think about my job if I'm barely being paid to do it.
I see where you're coming from, but I wasn't desperate enough to actively try to get that job when it paid that salary. I still would have had to put in the same effort as I would have had to for a better-paying job.
I have a different job now anyway.
>tfw worked steadily from age 18-26
>tfw hated every moment of it
>tfw became NEET, moved into homeless shelter
>tfw 28 now, 2 and a half years of unemployment
>tfw trying to get back into the workforce
WHAT have you BEEN DOING for the last 2 years?!
>>25729329
25 here almost same situation worked from 17 to 24 with about 1 year off spread out between jobs. Haven't worked since last winter and I'm going to start looking. I don't even know what to say if they ask why I never worked a day in 2015. I mostly do labour work so I depend on them seeing I'm a big guy and hire me
>get masters degree
>work as instructor at community college
>it's basically no work and no stress
>decent wage and benfits
>>25724574
You start working younger, also most people do events and volunteering and social things throughout highschool. This can all be applied as experience.
