>tfw got the virgin question
It came out of absolutely nowhere. I always thought it wouldn't be that bad, you know. That I would just say yes and play it cool. Like the confident guy, just 'waiting for the right one'.
It fucking hurt. It hurt like a knife stabbing me in the chest. I didn't even reply but the answer was perfectly clear. He reduced me to a stuttering mess with a single fucking question.
Just end it all man. Fuck, it was in front of a girl as well.
why can't you just fucking lie?
>are you a virgin?
no
wow that was hard
>>25474156
Yeah well, I didn't. Thanks for the advice though, I'll keep it in mind next time someone metaphorically slam-dunks my face into the pavement.
>>25474156
mommy told me never to lie
>>25474156
>with who?
>show me a pic of her so I can see if she is hot
>we should invite her to parties
etc
You will end up like only saying ehhh, I don't wanna tell y-y-you uhhhhhhh. They will know if you lie.
How do I know?
I lost my virginity and got asked these question and I was so thankful I did not lie before when asked.
Man, it hurts like shit because you'll be known as "that virgin beta bitch" now, and depending how old are you, it may ot may not hurt that bad. If you're 18-20 yeah u kinda fucked up but you need to pull through and wait until you'll grow older and learn to cope with society's irrational standards of living. If it makes you feel any better, you are part of a collective suffering worldwide triggered by a way of living unfit to man. Godspeed anon, keep your chin up.
I've been asked the virgin question once, and it played out in my favor
>talking with aquantinces, freshman year of college
>conversation turns to sex, everyone was talking about their experiences
>The conversation turns to me and the Chad just blurts out that I'm a virgin, all the other girls give me a somewhat pitiful look, nod, and say "yeah... prolly"
>I give a confident, undaunted look and tell him that I'm not
>He asks me to share my experience
>I say I don't want to
>They tease me for not revealing
>I give myself misty eyes and insist with a crack of sadness in my voice that I don't want to talk about it
>I'm staring at my beer and tearing at the label with my thumb
>I storm out and one of the girls chases me, catches up to me and asks "what the fuck"
>I tell her I was molested
>They all feel like huge dicks for trying to pry info from me
>Get invited to house party by the biggest douche in the group a few days later
>Get a blowjob from a 5-5.5/10
That's how I got my first and only sexual experience (aside from being molested). The truth is this "older man" I told them about was only 6 years older than me. I was 5, he was 11, and we both enjoyed it
>>25474339
>The truth is this "older man" I told them about was only 6 years older than me. I was 5, he was 11, and we both enjoyed it
>>25474339
That's not bad, anon. I may try this at some point.
>>25474156
I tried to lie before, but couldn't follow through. Once I said no, they started asking me sex questions. I couldn't answer them good enough. So they just knew I was a virgin.
After that happened, I just outright say that I am. It's worst if they catch you in the lie, then just outright saying it.
>>25474292
It hurts particularly bad because of the people I was with. Every other group of people I 'hang out' with knows I'm a beta faggot with no self-esteem and they either tollerate or accept me for it, but not this group. No, here I'm the confident guy. I'm the funny one, I'm the one talking, I'm the one with the stories, I'm the one with the jokes and witty remarks. My carefully crafted persona just took a gigantic fucking hit and I'm not sure whether it'll recover.
>>25474156
i want to be honest with them
i want to be different
i just bullshit how i lost in 8th grade or some shit whenever im asked, better than looking like some virgin loser that i actually am
>>25474339
>The truth is this "older man" I told them about was only 6 years older than me. l was 5, he was 11, and we both enjoyed it
I got this question and then said girl took my virginity. Chill out, OP.
>>25474339
Cheers anon. I'm going to tell the normies I got molested now, thanks to your wise advise. You're a regular Odysseus.
>>25474339
DEVILISH
MAD
A
N
>>25475113
I was able to pull it off because it actually did happen to me. I just told them the story of what had happened, only I make it seem like I didn't enjoy me blowing him, him blowing me, and cock duelling in the end.
The tears and all I pulled off because I'm a decent actor, which helps
>>25474255
>with who?
Girl in high school
>what was her name?
[name from any girl you knew in high school, implying they can fact check this shit]
>show me a pic
lost contact with her years ago m80
>>25474098
>caring that you're a virgin
that's when you fucked up
>>25474339
>I was molested so I'm not a virgin
>with online friends at a con
>people getting drunk
>everyone decides to play that game if you raise your hands if you've done the thing the person says
>every question is sexually related
>my face the whole time
>>25474339
Now THAT'S devilish. Well done.
>>25475411
You just wait, it'll happen to you.
>>25474098
>mfw I will always have an answer to this question since im not an autist who refuses to improve himself with a side goal of getting a gf
>tfw 25
>no one ever asks that question anymore cause this isnt high school
>people assume its impossible for me to be a virgin even though i literally have the aspergers
just wait it out my friends, it actually does get easier
>>25474339
Wait. You're still technically a virgin. I had a blowjob aswell it doesn't really mean anything.
>>25474339
Since feminists can play the victim all the time, it's great to see a guy do it for once.
>>25475682
I did anal, in both ways
>>25475708
But you were 6 years old. You couldn't even have ejaculated.
>>25475730
Still got to feel my willy in a butthole, and he ejaculated into me. It felt warm and tingly. we stopped doing it after a while so I used dressing and other cum looking stuff and wiggled it around in my ass. My mom was puzzled why dressing and milk was under my bed
>>25475608
>btw you're wayy too attractive and good with that big dick
Top kek, nice try
>>25475776
You lie, I don't even think I was able to get an erection at age 6, let alone know what to do with it.
>>25475865
I didn't say I got erect, I just said I stuck it in
>>25475776
Yeah but you're still a virgin. Sorry to bring it to you like that.
>>25475878
Literally how. I would expect an 11 year olds butthole to be extremely tight. You don't just 'slide' a flaccid object in there. You would have had to force it in, which would not have been a pleasant experience.
You're bullshitting, you're probably not even the same anon from the original post.
>>25475990
What makes you think I got too deep? I just kinda used my hands to get the upper parts of my dick in there. Id lean back once it's in and pluck my dick like it was a thick string.
For me the whole business was mostly just silly secret play. He actually got seem impact when he stuck it in me.
>>25476072
So you're saying you fucked an 11 year old boy? I bet your Chad friends would love to know about that.
>>25476072
>pluck my dick like it was a thick string.
>>25475371
Yeah, nothing makes hoes wetter than telling them you got molested. Nice job, m8 :^)
>>25474339
Audible kek, nice work mate
>>25474292
Not being a beta bitch is a pretty rational societal standard though
>>25476198
It didn't help me attract any of them, of course not. But it got me to a house party where I know some of the people there, making me more than just another weird guy. It lead to me getting blown, which is pretty good.
It's preferable to being the virgin laughing stock I assure you
>>25474339
You posted this before anon
Pretty good if true, pretty good pasta even if false.
>>25476263
I know I have, I have so few good stories I like to post them when I can
>>25474339
Goon improv/10
>>25474197
You're a total autist to attach that much value to it.
If you weren't unhealthily obsessed with sex, your life would be easier and more fulfilling.
Just some tips for you.
>>25474098
When the fuck does this happen? I've gotten asked and I just say "Ya I am, so?" One time they didn't give a fuck and the other time the kid chuckled a bit. Who the fuck actually cares. There are so many worse things to be embarrassed about. If you let this get to you your honestly either a little bitch or paranoid.
>tfw people assume I'm not
if I ever get asked I plan on lying, something along the lines of 'yeah, its been a while tho. just a one-night stand freshman year.' cause it'll still make sense that I'm terrible at/don't know a lot about sex, but at least they won't think I'm nearly as pathetic to still be a virgin. And the thing is I really don't care that I haven't had sex yet. Sure it sucks, but I haven't put any effort in to try an get some in the first place so I really can't be that upset. It's just that stigma around it which is bothering and something I'd like to avoid.
>>25474098
This question is only a big deal if you're a liar. If you're an honest person, just say "yeah I'm a virgin." Here's how a typical conversation would go.
>How many girls have you fucked
>"None"
>Wait, you're a virgin?
>"Yep, I've never fucked."
>Haha weird, why not?
>"Never made an effort to, I guess. It doesn't really bother me."
And then the conversation moves on to other topics.
>>25474339
>The truth is this "older man" I told them about was only 6 years older than me. I was 5, he was 11, and we both enjoyed it
Hahaha you're such a nigga.
>>25474255
>with who?
doesn't matter
like I haven't told anyone who I lost my virginity with and I'd rather keep it that way since I don't talk to her anymore
If no one believes you, well, tough shit. They don't need to believe you.
>>25474339
So you were actually molested?
And this "worked out in your favor" because you got head, once, from an ugly chick?
That's fucking hilarious.
That's why I lost mine with a hooker. I suck at lying but I'm great at hiding the truth and avoiding questions, so if I ever need to say I'm not a virgin I can do it and avoid telling unnecesary details.
Yea it's better not to lie. Being a virgin isn't a bad thing and gedding caught in a lie makes you look foolish.
>>25476785
I didn't mind the "molesting" can hardly call it that when the kid was only 11 in my view but whatever. I enjoyed it as it was happening and it doesn't bother me at all now
It lead to me being blown by an average chick
>>25476785
Well he also got to have sex with a cute older guy.
>>25476820
Wow dude your life is total garbage, I'm extremely pleased I am not you.
>>25474156
If they ask they already know the answer.
>>25476841
not the guy you're responding to but, you're just salty cause you never got your dick sucked fag
Tell them that fornication is a violation of God's law and you believe that it is your duty to sin no more as a believer in Christ. You'll get respect for that.
>>25476841
>Around average looking
>Rich parents
>Uni being paid for without costing me a dime
>In good health
I'm fine friendo, or as fine as I can be and while being a regular of /r9k/
>>25476705
Here's how it would actually go
>How many girls have you fucked
>"None"
>Wait, you're a virgin?
"Yep, I've never fucked."
>Hahaha, everyone, anon is a virgin!
>every girl in a 5 mile radius becomes dry as a desert and begins to chuckle uncontrollaby
>you get laughed out of the room
>everyone cuts contact with you
>ostracized and mocked every occasion
>you kill yourself and everyone comes to your funeral just to tell your family that you were a virgin failure
>Hey Stacy, remember that virgin faggot anon?
>Haha yeah Chad he's nothing like you, can I suck your dick?
>>25477050
This is reality
>>25476705
This is fanfiction. Admitting to being a virgin will always lead people to think less of you.
>>25477050
the last part made me chuckle, good kek matey
>>25477050
don't forget the part that mom is also dry upon hearing it on the funeral
>>25474098
They just assume I hit it regularly. ps. I haven't. I'm not going to tell them that. Only my family is aware.
If anyone asks me, I have a made up ex gf who I had a bad breakup with. I refer to her as "crazy" etc.
I also had a 2 year period where I literally cutoff all contact with everyone I know, in my headcanon I had sex twice in that period, once with a fat chick while drunk, and once with a pretty hot 8/10 goth girl.
My "crazy" ex has a name, and I haven't talked to her in years, that way people can't look her up, also since the relationship ended poorly, I am no longer in any contact with her or don't care to know.
So I have had one GF (for 8 months) and I have had sex with 3 different females, one fat chick and one pretty hot goth chick.
The reality is I am a 29 year old Kissless, handholdless virgin faggot who wacks off to anime characters on a daily basis, shares a bank account with his mommy who regularly puts in rent money and has not made a new friend in 15 years.
>>25474156
Because it's even more pathetic to lie and say you're not a virgin than to just admit that you are
I had a girl, ask me in bed if I was a virgin. This was in highschool, I didn't even know her that well, but I lied then and never had to lie again.
I'm not gonna read all this shit in this thread but I have a question for all the people who have been asked why they are virgins (or for all the people who have asked another person if they are a virgin)
- why would someone ask another person if they are a virgin? -
this seems like a personal matter, it seems rude to ask, it seems against societal norms to ask.
>>25474255
> "no"
> with who?
> "a hooker"
>>25478937
If a normie dislikes you, he doesn't want to outright say you're a faggot so he asks this question in hopes of demasking you and making everyone else hate you.
>>25479212
Hmm. maybe it's an age difference thing.
I'd say:
"Why would you ask me that? That is a weird question."
and then let it linger and I'm fairly confident he would feel stupid and the people around would think it was an inappropriate question.
Then I'd ask: "are you a virgin?"
but, if I think back, when I was younger I can see someone asking this and the people gathering around and if I gave the response as above, they would all laugh at me and assume I was a virgin.
Yea, this is why I am reclusive. I have normies. I come on 4 chan but even r9k is 60% failed normies attempting to use r9k as /adv.
>>25474098
Just fucking say "no" without missing a beat
It'll make you look like a faggot if you don't desu
