What was your first kiss like anon?
>>25460719
>first kiss
Get out.
>>25460719
true robots never got a kiss nor a hug from a female
>>25460724
/thread
Original etc. etc.
>>25460739
/thread
>mom's don't count.
>>25460719
Drunk in a bar with an equally drunk chubby Korean chick.
>>25460739
True robots belong on wizzardchan. Go now, go, go
>>25460719
Good, actually. How was yours?
>>25460719
some drunk girl in hs I was friends with in high school was like come over here what is this and when we turned the corner she did weird shit with her tounge (did i spell that right?) and it was pretty cool. That was the first and last time that shit ever happened and it was like 7 or 8 years ago.
Really really bad
I'm not a normal person so I've gotten auglygirl at least naked and she didnt let me put my dick in her so I'm still a virgin
But when we first kissed we were listening to I Hate Myself in my car before I dropped her off after a night of spilling my spaghetti
I no joke had to ask her to do it because I was too scared to and my body wouldn't let me lean in and do it
Never had a gf since
>>25460719
>had fight with ex
>we back together
>tell her I miss her so much that when I see you I will jump on you and hug you
>we go to the same school, so she don't wanna be embarrassed
>she tell me I can't
>made a bit with her
>"if I did it you have to give me a kiss"
>"if I don't I have to give you a kiss"
>not sure we even met on the day I said I will jump on her...
>meet her days after
>we are talking about different things on a quiet place
>"ex, you owe me something"
>she turn red
>look to the other side
>"I don't even know how to kiss"
>"it's fine we will learn together"
>think I should kiss only her lips since it's her 1st time and she's so shy
>I'm kissing her
>what's that?
>it tasted so sweet
>wtf, she used her tongue!
>me talking with her even she isn't looking at my side anymore
>thinking how I missed using tongue too
>go for another kiss
>that one was goooood
>omg her bold lips
Never happened. You know why?
BECAUSE I'M NOT A FUCKING NORMIE.
7th grade. I she was my girl for a while now. suddenly got confident and stopped her and gave her a kiss.
I don't know what I am anymore.
>>25460719
i was too forceful and she couldn't breathe, but i didn't know she was trying to push me away so i almost killed her
>>25460719
n/a
Get the fuck out.
Never have, probably never will.
Earlier this year at a college party. I coul've fucked her but pussied out. Also first ass grab and titty feel
She told me to "brush your fucking teeth" 5 seconds into it
When I came back from brushing my teeth she was texting
before discussing this it's important to know that i am a 28 year old virgin and my only contact with females sexually is kissing. this has completely tainted my view of sexuality and intimacy.
in the 7th grade i got my first and last girlfriend. she went to another school and we would typically meet up at the movies on weekends after our parents dropped us off. while watching a beautiful mind we were holding hands and i looked at her and bumped her nose with mine playfully. she wanted to do it again so i knew this was the time. i opened my mouth and stuck my tongue out pretty far as this is how i thought adults were supposed to kiss french kiss. after tasting her gross saliva and tonguing her for a few seconds i pulled back because i felt like i was going to gag. we finish the movie and i feel like a fucking stud. i finally did it i was becoming a man. that night on the phone i asked her if she thought i was a good kisser. to which she replied. ummm ...not really? but we can practice :3. i fucking flipped out over this because i fucking hate criticism and am very insecure. i broke up with her right there and said we shouldn't be together then. she cried really hard. i felt humiliated and ashamed.
flash forward 10 years or so. i get drunk with a gril and we alone later on. i was sad drunk and stuck in a thought loop where i was talking about how bad i felt for something i had done while drunk and mid sentence she kisses me to get me to shut up and just fuck her. i had learned my lesson and just sort of mimicked what she was doing and opened my mouth on hers closing some. it was a nicer kiss but still tasted like yucky spit. after the kiss i finished my sentence from before. she sighed really loud pushed herself off me and told me to get out. she didn't want me here any longer. after that she was distant with me and i sent her vulgar and harassing text messages which increased in severity and frequency once she got a new boyfriend a few weeks later. ruined me.
I kissed a girl in my first grade class because she brought in brownies or some shit.
If we're talking about kisses that count, my first kiss was the summer between my sophomore and junior year of college, somehow a mutual crush developed between me and a girl in my circle of friends. We made out for like two hours because I didn't know how to do anything else and she had to vocally suggest we move to third base lol.
She dumped me in junior year because I was too clingy.
>>25461301
>i fucking flipped out over this because i fucking hate criticism and am very insecure
lold
>>25461301
>I am a failed Normal: the post.
I was 15, she was too. We were on a bus returning from a baseball game. It was late, probably around 9 pm. The build up was excruciating and my heart was racing. I had already practiced beforehand so I wasn't completely unprepared. I placed my bottom lip between hers and lightly pushed my lips down on hers. We did this for about 10 seconds, and I kissed her twice. Later I was less shy and caressed her face with my hand as we made out with lots of tongue for 15 min tbqh. She was a 9/10 with braces, too. Amazing experience, and I remember it with fond, /comfy/ nostalgia
Why am I on this board lol
>>25461301
This post has made my day. You're too funny anon :3
On a party. The biggest of the party was drunk and I was also drunk. My friend told me to kiss her so I did. We actually made out. That was my only kiss
>>25461363
lol because i kissed a gril twice in 28 years and had fucking horrible experiences both times i'm a failed normie. i feel like i was a failed normie around the time that i kissed the 2nd gril when i was early 21 or 22. i still had some hope then. but try spending 6 additional years after those days in almost complete isolation. no friends. no contact with a gril whatsoever. no job. no prospect. just you and your computer laying in bed for YEARS trapped inside your mind and tell me that that doesn't turn someone into a full on robot. i barely remember being a normie and when i was one i was also the odd man out, the lone wolf, the weird kid. i'm a fucking robot i earned this shit. i didn't even like kissing dude all it did was fracture my ego even further.
>>25461437
I'll allow it, but you know the boys in the union aren't as forgiving as I am.
>having any chances or being remotely close to a female.
Ehhhhh, I'll probably lose my station for this you Normalfag.
>>25461346
>>25461410
thanks guys glad to be of service.
shit was pretty rough at the time... that chick's boyfriend eventually confronted me about the texts with a gang of chads later on too. i pretty much got the shit slapped out of me, choked, spit on. fun times. if a guy gets in your face... dont laugh at anything he says. it will just make him really fucking angry.
>>25460719
In a park on Valentine's Day like seven years ago, 14 y.o, was eh, forgettable
Same girl had been begging me to come over her house and fuck her for weeks so
Never got around to it ofc
>>25461490
much obliged familia.
i think blind luck/chance alone will put a robot in this situation as long as he isn't super introverted or super repulsive in the looks department. but i blew it because deep down i was never meant for normalcy.
>>25461437
>>25461437
I'm the guy that posted this >>25460871
I'm a virgin too btw...
My ex told me that she didn't liked our kiss, and she felt disgusted about it, so I stopped talking to her like for 2 weeks, even if when she saw me and come to talk to me, I just pretend she isn't there, until she gave up and told me we broke up...
And about the years after, no friends, no gf, only PC all day... you literally me man...
>>25461577
well at least my gril tried to spare my feelings. she wasnt even mean about it. i totally overreacted. but it's ok man, women are vile disgusting creatures who should be put down. it's infuriating how much control they have over us. glad i got out desu. i see people wasting so much time and effort and money on them only to get cucked in the end. not worth.
>>25460719
>spin the bottle
>mfw first kiss was a fat 12 year old boy when I was 15
>had to kiss 3 other boys before I could kiss my first girl
>banged teeth with her
>didn't get to kiss any other girls
>>25461611
Well, we are Muslims and she isn't supposed to like something like that, and I didn't knew back then her father is an Islamic education prof... so it was misunderstanding from my part but who cares.
I don't hate Women, but I'm kind of afraid to find myself one day with a girl that likely to cuck me... so I value loyalty so much.
And btw man don't let r9k propaganda affect you, just try to get you life together and get a cute gf and live your life, it's never late.
>>25460719
well at this camp we had at our final year at the "little school "(11 at the time). (this camp was in the summet before going to hight school in my country 11-16/18) everbody told me that they already kissed especialie the girls,so there was a bit of pressure on me( later i found out they were lying becuase they thought it sounded cooler if they already kissed, keep in mind we were 11 at the time). well at some point we played a kind of truth or dare and i was made to kiss a girl.. she was waaay taller than me ( im 5"4 now ). So my whole class saw me kissing her. well that wasnt that big of a deal, but this friend of mine kissed her like a minute before me (total beta already).
i live in this small village so i still got teased about this many years. also she couldnt kiss, it was like a wash machine..
Never, I would be too afraid anyway.
>>25461705
i literally have less experience with women equal to that of a preteen. i am repulsive physically completely ashamed of my body. i was raised in a single parent home by my mom with my sister. literally raised by women. i don't know how to attract a gril or even interact with her properly. i basically act like a bitchy girl. i talk too much if i feel comfortable with them, most of the time i am a shy introverted nightmare to be around. spaghetti everywhere. self depreciating humor. real cringe stuff. i live in my mom's basement at 28. my only real interests are video games and shit posting. i am trying to come to terms with living out my life in solitude and dying alone one day. i've got bigger things to worry about beside attracted and enticing a mate. like how to get over my autist routine of wallowing in self pity and take the steps to being self sufficient before my old hag of a mother dies off. if i can get off the ground MAYBE i would try again IF the right opportunities presented themselves and even then i am pretty sure i would fail miserably. thanks for the encouragement i appreciate the gesture. hope all goes well for you. we're gonna make it.
>>25460739
What about from an escort?
>>25461272
ehm how old were u at the time?
>>25461628
wow what a huge faggot anon
>be drunk while cleaning up after work
>chubby mexican coworker tells me to kiss her
>be a weak beta when sober, but not give a fuck when drunk, so instead of doing the sensible thing and walking back upstairs (the booze was hidden in the basement), i just stand there like a sperg
>she walks up to me and kisses me herself instead
>for some reason i sit back down instead of walking upstairs immediately, i probably thought i was playing it cool
>she tells me to kiss her again
>as i try to get up to flee the scene, she pins me down in the chair and kisses me again
>she uses tongue this time
I was sexually assaulted and it feels nasty.
It was ok I suppose, I got a blow job right after. That was better.
It was with the little wheelchair boy who had lived next door.
We were waiting in his dad's SUV for something, I told him I like-liked him, and he kissed me.
It was while we were pretend child bf/gf that somebody I finally figured out, because of some shitty YA novel, that his MS was eventually going to kill him, he had been my best friend for five years and nobody had ever told me.
He started some fight, and I used it as an excuse to never speak to him again.
I was afraid to watch him die.
>>25461854
I'm sure you will make it, I believe on you anon.
>>25460719
I was physically trembling and she mentioned it
>>25461628
dude thats gay as fuck
>>25460719
Was weird, she forced her mouth into mine and kind of hurt my teeth
second one was pretty good though she was sucking on my tongue and shit
>>25461837
thats very young anon
my dad made me kiss his penis last year when i was 26
>>25461837
jezus why? the? fuck?
>>25461946
this is sad. ms takes a long ass time to kill someone but you were kids. you know you're still probably his only kiss right? especially if he has gotten worse since his wheelchair days. then again maybe he played the sympathy card and got more pussy than me. either way your story gave me feels.
way too wet and i was grossed out when the tongue came into play but the girl said i had soft lips and was a good kisser. ive had women tell me when i kiss them it turns them on more than anything else.
>I was in the backseat of my sisters boyfriends car, sis and her bf were in the front smoking weed
>I'm in the backseat with one of her gay neckbeard friends
>There is a rumor that I'm gay, but I didn't have feelings either way (I was 14 and dressed in goth/emo shit, of course I was called a fag)
>Neckbeard takes a hit of the pot
>Asks if I want some
>I say sure, I guess, I never had any before
>He grabs my face, pinches my jaw open, and makes out with me while breathing the weed down my throat
>I scrambled out of the car and hid on the beach for hours until my sister found me, they had kicked out neckbeard and he had to walk home alone
Luckily he was a dropout so I didn't have to see him at school, he messaged me for about three years after and tried to find out where I lived and shit. Horrid.
>>25462004
sorry time, faggot
>>25462038
yeah sorry time bro. sorry time.
>>25462038
fuck... no sleep for 48 hrs
story time now
>>25462026
wow. this is the best one yet. worst experience ever. i can't imagine how that must have felt.
for the record are you gay now?
>tfw I'll never be intimate with another person
What's the point of living
Happened just recently, on the 26th December.
I finally met my online gf, we went for a walk together to a park in the evening. It was dark, we sat on a bench and she laid her head on my shoulder. I moved in for the kiss and she gave me a kiss back. Happy times desu senpai. We've been sleeping in the same bed for the last few days,haven't fugged tho. She's going home in a couple of days ;_;
>>25462086
>are you gay nowyes...
>>25462086
Thanks m8, it was terrible.
I've dated girls and guys. Never went anywhere on either side, but I dont think that first experience fucked me up or anything, I just dont really feel a biological imperative or a need for romantic connection.
I'm just happy with my friends and hobbies.
>>25462026
>Not making him suck your dick and turning him into your personal cumdump
>>25462111
how can u sleep on same bed and not fuck?
it's impossible for me to do such thing...
>>25462142
do you smoke weed errday?
>>25462170
weed and cock
>>25462160
Idk desu
It can be nice just to cuddle, and I don't think she wants to fuck. Not yet anyway. She's the sweet and cute type, you know?
>>25462181
>>25462142
fucking shitposter
i like you
>>25462015
I thought he died around 16-18, but he turned back up asking me if I wanted to grab coffee on campus, he was getting an associates degree in design at my same school.
He had no assured amount of time, but he wanted to learn how to do cool shit.
We didn't manage to schedule something before he died about a year ago, I figured I'd bump into him on campus.
>>25460719
bags of sand
there isno way this is original
>>25460719
underwhelming
didn't realize she was a smoker until then. literally tasted like death
>>25460761
If you werent a macfag, I'd call you my nigga.
>>25462150
He was ugly, like a neckbeard meme. Not even 'Yeah just clean him up and he'll be fine', just purely product-of-incest looking.
I heard he got muscled up later, which honestly just makes me fear seeing him more, but Im 23 and I dont dress super faggy anymore, so he might not recognize me should I ever have to visit my hometown again.
>>25461272
Funniest thing I've seen all week.
Thank you for entertaining me with your pain.
>>25462205
holyshit that is depressing. wonder if he thought about his first kiss in his last moments before death?
>>25460719
Pretty decent. We were on a school trip and made out on the bus. I played with her bewbs.
Ah, let's see, my first kiss.
It was at the tender young age of 22. I was doing my final tour of duty as a counselor at a summer camp for retards and I had grown close to another counselor.
She was quite lovely. Beautiful face, olive complexion. She was also quite intelligent. In retrospect, she may have had some psychiatric issues. There were those unsettling comments suggesting she had pedophilic tendencies...but why trouble ourselves with messy reality?
We commandeered the cabin reserved for "music class" where the retards "learned music", which more or less meant we played aforesaid music for them while they pissed themselves and masturbated. I put on a Tom Waits album ("Alice", because I'm a romantic, you see). We laid down on two small couches pushed together (one was heavily stained with retard-urine), and she took the lead.
We spent the entire summer together.
That was more than 13 years ago. I am still a wizard. And now an alcoholic to boot.
I sometimes wonder whether my memories of that summer are purely manufactured, whether they're just desperate day dreams concocted in a distillation of whiskey and tears.
On the upswing, I've only been taken into custody by the Office of Mental Health once in the subsequent decade and a half. So I consider myself doing quite well, insofar as wizards are concerned. I've never even murdered anybody or appeared on a reality television show. So, you know, I've maintained some goodness.
>>25462074
oh ok.
>living at home
>parents increasingly frustrated with me
>dad wants to borrow "my" laptop (they bought it for me 4 years ago)
>say fine cuz he's bigger than me (military)
>he gives it back completely formatted, he has shit-eating grin
>sperg out
>call him asshole
>start crying
>he tells me to leave the house or pay the toll every day
>tell him i have no money
>he says ok toll is kiss my penis head
>think he's joking so i tell him to shut up
>he pushes me out the front door
>it's cold
>nowhere to go
>bang on door for a while, crying
>he yells out "ready to pay the toll?"
>say ok
>think he's just bullying me to teach me a lesson
>no way he'll make me do it
>go in
>he pulls penis out
>slowly get closer
>it's big and it smells (not erect tho)
>inching towards it waiting for him to laugh at me and call me a faggot and tell me to stop trying to suck his dick (he bullied me in a similar way sometimes)
>suddenly he grabs my head and smashes my lips against his penis head
>i'm crying and freaking out
>"kiss my dick already you fag!!!"
>give it a soft kiss
>"that's what i thought fag"
>releases me and i fall on the floor crying
>see mom watching from door looking horrified
>think she will comfort me
>go up to her "mommy..."
>she says "i'm disgusted with you, anon. get out of my sight." and walks away
>never had to kiss penis again but i sure never talked back to him anymore
Idk I've kissed a shit ton of girls at this point but the first one was one of my better accomplishments early on
>be 15
>meet hot 19 yr old senior girl at party
>she messages me on fb later, gives me her number
>being 15 and kinda an autist at this point I didn't take the hints she was dropping
>one night she tells me to come meet her at some house party down the street
>no car, walk to the party dodging cars the whole way like a retard because afraid parents caught me sneaking out
>parties over by the time I got there, get in her car instead
>spill spaghetti for like 2 hours talking to her instead of making out with her
>finally kiss her 10/10 A1 experience
>get dropped off right as my dad wakes up
Good times, it got a lot easier after that
>>25462305
Should have sucked it
It was for FUCKING NORMIE SCUM HHHHHUUU FUCK REEEEEEEEEEEE AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH RAAAAAAAGH AUGHHHHHHHHH GOD DAMN FUCKING OUT GET OUT REEEEEEEEEEEE AAAAAAAAAAAAA RRRRAAAAAA HRRRRRRRRRRRRUUUUU AAAAAAAAGGGGHHHHH REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE GO OUT NOW GO LEAVE NORMIE FUCK HAAAAAAAAAA REEEEEEEEEE
>>25462305
ur dad is weird, the whole calling you faggot...
you think he was interested on you?
>>25461525
Did it go down like the fat kid from Full Metal Jacket?
>YOU HAVE 5 SECONDS TO WIPE THAT FUCKING SMILE OFF YOUR FACE
>i'm trying, sir :(
>i can't help it, sir
>>25462388
newfagg detected
>>25461899
>>25461971
I know. The worst part is that I'm mostly straight, but because of games of spin the bottle when I was a kid I've kissed more guys than I have girls.
>>25462456
You can kiss me baby
>>25462305
>Not making your dad cum then saying "Who's the fag now daddy"
You had one job
>>25462283
Maybe.
I've kissed three people who are now dead.
>>25462422
yeah similar. he got in my face and and was yelling some shit at me. with his buddies around to back him up. plus he was a big guy. for you. and then he said AND STOP SENDING HER THOSE WEIRD FUCKING TEXT MESSAGES!! i couldn't help but laugh a little when he said it thinking back to the creepy shit i would send her. i remember one mentioned how i would be around the corner jerking off in a bush watching her with her new bf and crying. real depraved shit. so i laughed. so he said DID I SAY SOMETHING FUNNY?? HUH? SOMETHING FUNNY ABOUT ALL THIS? i was stammering out n-no just the way you said it.. i dont know...was- and then he was on me in a second. his hand closing on my trachea couldnt breathe at all. was pretty scary. i dont remember what enraged shit he was babbling at me because i was freaking out so much or have blocked it out. just remember him yelling at me. and he slapped me pretty hard like a bitch. and released his grib. spit on me and walked away. his gang of chads were laughing and when i looked up. they all followed him out. the last face i saw was his 14 year old little brother with a shit eating grin parting his lips.
>>25462665
it was only just over a year ago. i stood in the street with a friend kissing. it was the early hours of the morning, starting to get light, i wonder if anyone was watching out of their window.hegave me tips because it was my first time. both slightly drunk.
>>25462665
maybe you should stop kissing people roastie of death
>>25460719
don't remember my 1st kiss, but I do remember being 10 and asking my brother if we could stop practice kissing, because I felt weird kissing my brother, I wanted to kiss girls, not boys, he was 6 years older and aid no, I told him I would tell our Aunt, she had custody of us, he said OK to stop kissing, but wanted to show me another trick, I agreed to keep kissing him if agreed to keep sucking my dick
does kissing buttholes count? i've only ever kissed buttholes. to be fair, i am a piece of toilet paper.
>>25463155
upvote xD
>>25460719
Never had one, but I might risk going to jail by stealing one from Margot here
>>25460719
>first kiss
Do people seriously remember this? I have absolutely no idea when, how old I was, or with whom. I don't even remember the name of the girl I lost my virginity to.
it was in first grade on the playground with a pretty girl
>>25463557
You're fucking weird. I remember every detail of any interaction with girls, even hugs
STOP POSTING TRIGGERING QUESTIONS
>>25463646
The kissing thing is because it happened quite a few times in school already, and I didn't really think "oh wow, that was my first!" when it happened.
As for the virginity thing, I was (surprise surprise) pretty drunk. Never saw her again.
>>25460719
Awkward and not how I pictured it
>>25460719
>Kiss girl on first date
>After 1.5 seconds of lips touching, she breaks apart and starts laughing
>Get really hurt and taken aback
>Feel like she is mocking me
>Rage builds up
>Says she is nervous, and that she laughs whenever she is nervous
>We kiss a few more times but they are all brief and she half-giggles
>Escort her home, scared to do anything else and feeling like I'm being humiliated
>When she waves goodbye I give a middle finger, don't know why, just felt anger
.... But happy ending though, it turns out she actually does laugh when nervous (she's autistic like that) and she's now my gf.
>>25460863
>I've gotten a ugly girl at least naked and she didnt let me put my dick in her
JUST
