has anyone ever successfully transitioned from almost complete shut-in to decent social gains before?
i just fuck around & do drugs in my room, work out, or work. i work at a small company and the guys all have gf's or are old & the girls are taken. i basically have 1 friend that i smoke & lift with but he has a gf.
i haven't been to a social event in years i don't even know how to act in public. last time i went to a concert it was weird so i left
I made massive social gains and I still want to kill myself
I was a fat weeb with poor hygiene. I am not anymore. And now I feel as if this life is a lie.
Do not fall for this meme, "fake it till you make it." You will forget who you used to be and you will instead become a character you despise. I am lost somewhere in the sea of time, I am a Ulysses searching for my Ithica, my happiness, and I don't think this odyssey has a conclusion
>>25449470
did u get a gf? how did u do it
>>25449740
I got a retail job and was forced to overcome my autism or starve to death. I eventually started picking up on basics of human interaction --- at first it was of course awkward on numerous occasions, but I got better. I am by no means perfect or even likable now, but I can pass off as a human being with a somewhat normal childhood.
I have had one serious gf who stomped on my heart. I have fucked a handful of Tinder sluts, all of which were butt-fucking-ugly but stroked my ego and my dick so I let them bounce on me while I closed my eyes and pretended I had enough disposable income to afford an attractive escort.
I have multiple friends who notice if I'm gone and seem to generally care about my wellbeing. My closest friend is my lifting buddy and even he does not know the extent of my death spiral. He does not talk to me often when we aren't at the gym.
Go back. There is nothing here for us. I want to go back but it is too late. I forgot what I liked and I liked forgetting it, too.
>>25449080
>Ages 13-18
>All my self-esteem is systematically bullied, rejected and racism'd out of me.
>Become more and more insular
>Go from playing video games casually to becoming a full fledged gamer
>First begin browsing internet forums and gradually end up working my way to 4chan.
>Only a few friends and most of them are females I was attracted to but who friendzoned me
>Everyone else just saw me as an ebin meme they laughed at.
>Kissless virgin with no hope of ever becoming liked by my peers
>After finishing my A-Levels I take a year out of just doing fuck all and being a NEET shut in.
>Age 19
>Start attending uni
>Stop trying to be nice and polite and just start being a cynical, sardonic joker.
>Ignore women like they ignored me and focus entirely on having a good time.
>Become more outgoing, start saying yes to more things
>Literally just go up to people I find interesting and befriend them and it fucking works somehow
>Girls start showing an interest in me (though I'm still too insecure to make a move on any of them)
>Start working out at the gym and getting /fit/
>Age 20
>Large network of friends, including a best friend who is a bro for life.
>Regularly talking to a girl who has a crush on me and working up the nerve to be more forward with her.
>One of the central figures in my group of friends and constantly asked to hang out/go out with them.
>Everyone thinks I'm hilarious, but are laughing with me now, not at me.
>Bulking up into bear mode at a pretty fast speed.
It's fucking amazing what a difference dealing with adults and being less inside your own head can make. I went from a complete beta NEET to a failed normie on the way to being an actual normie. And I can't recommend hitting the gym enough. It was when I started getting muscles that girls began to show an interest in me for the first time.
>>25449972
How tall are you mang?
>>25449972
>Told to go to the Gym by everyone I know and people online
>mfw too scared to go to the gym due to fear of being judged by old High school students that knew me.
>>25450422
Changing is always difficult. It's kind of like puberty, it's painfully awkward. However, that's what needs to be done. People like us never got out of that awkward stage in adolescence, so we have to force ourselves through that awkward stage in order to regain any semblance of a normal life.
>>25449972
>tfw large group of friends but they either have gfs or are stoners who don't like going out
>>25450422
>everyone tells me to hit the gym
>I've lost 60 lbs on my own but I still look fat because no chin and skinny fat though according to bmi I'm normal weight
>I don't even know how to begin with lifting, like how to rack up or anything and when I ask fit they don't understand what I mean when I ask
>I have never seen a vagina or kissed a girl and I'm doomed because girls only think of me as the nerd friend who helps with homework and cracks the occasional joke
>>25449080
I was always one of the bottom-three kids picked last for gym class and was constantly made fun fun for all but my last year of high school.
I met a couple of girls online when I was 17 who were my first kiss/boob/blowjob and not even a week after my 18th birthday party I had sex and a steady girlfriend.
I adopted a punk/mallgoth persona but was genuinely into the music. If you fall into a certain fringe clique, it's much easier to live up to their standards of looks, behavior, activities than it to do that in the normie world.
So for 3-4 years I only hung out in the punk/goth/metal crowds and dated girls and made friends through there. After that I did manage to branch out to normies but that's where I felt that I was faking it and spreading myself too thin. Kept in touch for a few years after a while I just gave up and fell back into the punk crowd and then fell back into bad habits & eventually became full NEET where I am today.
Don't go to just any social event or concert or whatever, go where you want to be.
>>25451187
Check out ice cream fitness by Jason blaha. He has a page here
https://www.muscleandstrength.com/workouts/jason-blaha-ice-cream-fitness-5x5-novice-workout
It has videos for how to do each exercise. Join a local gym. Mine offered free coaching for the first few visits or you can hire a personal trainer for the first month or something to get experience. Lifting is really easy, don't use this lack of knowledge as an excuse. You know we have the Web you can look up anything you want.
If you have any questions ask me.
>>25449972
you're a nigger right?
do you chase white girls?
>>25451298
>Don't go to just any social event or concert or whatever, go where you want to be.
that's the problem though. i don't have anxiety, i'm not super ugly or awkward. i just can't think of a single thing i would want to do that involves meeting new people and i want a gf
>>25452094
>i just can't think of a single thing i would want to do that involves meeting new people
Don't.
Think of things you genuinely enjoy doing and would like to try out that involves going out in public, and do them, go with the flow of things and you might meet your future gf as an added bonus.
I used to go to punk & metal shows by myself literally all the time, the few friends that I had didn't like that music at all. I met a couple of girls that way.
>>25452191
i went to one metal concert with some friends and it was basically all dudes. and i barely even like music i just listen to it when i lift.
i honestly just sit in my room and get high all day when i'm not lifting or working. distracting myself with fapping, tv shows, movies, /r9k/...
that's what i by default do, but i wish i knew what a gf is like
>>25451451
Jason blahas a fag
Omar isuf'is zealous army master race reporting
Do these things it changed my life completely
>Go to good looking loser dot com
>find his anxiety program
>fucking follow that shit to the letter, if you don't I'll kill you
>get baby step experience
>figure out like I did that this isn't so hard
> be in college bang chicks that i approach in the library or wherever
Become legend anon you can do this. Trust me if I can you can. Don't even need muh lexapro anymore
>>25452707
I've had many gf and this is basically my ideal life. Not sure why you're unhappy. Sounds pretty dope desu.
>>25449080
Yeah I did it. Went neet at 15, at this point I'm not socially dumb anymore. Plenty of friends, only have trouble talking to really qt girls. Well liked, but without being a nice guy target. I learned psychology stuff about body language and how to act. Then I just got a lot of social practice, while being observant and treating it like I was in class learning a new subject. Talked to successful people, learned what they did that's good, learned about how even people who do well let themselves slouch in other areas because they don't strive hard.
>>25449080
Not gonna greentext 'cause I'm not in the mood, but I'll sum it up here.
Lost my girlfriend in a car accident, kind of withdraw from everything in life. Nothing really entertains me anymore, my friends are concerned with drinking, partying, sex, the typical college-age stuff (whether they're college fags or bluecollar workers with GEDs or less). It just doesn't entertain me, but long story short, I basically drop out of all social life and drag my sorry ass to the few CC classes I'm taking so my parents won't kick me out of the house and my 6-hours-a-week job at the library.
It's taken years, half a decade, but I'm finally back into socializing. I'm invited places again, when I invite people they often say 'yes' instead of making up obvious excuses, I even talk to girls again (although I don't know if I'll ever be able to have a successful relationship). I have a good job, I have a good apartment, my family respects me and what I've done with myself, and for the most part I finally enjoy life again. It's definitely different and a lot darker, but there's happiness again for the first time in years.
>>25453274
idk man if it's so preferrable to having a gf why do all my friends with gfs keep them, and do things they dont enjoy to make their gf unhappy? it must be fulfilling in some way that fapping is not
>>25453239
his program says it doesn't work if you have depression. i think i do, i don't really have anxiety i just dont want to do anything anymore. i don't even want to go out and try
>>25455308
Which is going to hurt was trying with the possibility of a positive outcome oooooorrrr sitting around doing nothing wishing you would do something and then feeling guilty that you haven't and letting this cycle repeat. I've been in that loop senpai but if you always do what you do then you're always going to get what you get. Do something different
>>25449972
>>Literally just go up to people I find interesting and befriend them and it fucking works somehow
not work for me. the people i approached to seem to evaluate me as a lower statues person
i literally hate humans
>>25455382
i can't think of a reason why a quality gril would even like me. i hate everything tbqh
>>25449080
I have
>be neet for 2 years out of high school
>parents make me go to school
>fail 3 semesters while photoshopping transcripts
>depressed as fuck
>disappear for a year
>homeless, neet, find older women to take care of me
>end up saving enough money from camshows to rent for 1 month on airbnb
>have found passion in math, and programming
>apply for student loans
>search for job everyday
>start going to school while working
>get apartment with person from work
>life sucks, but I'm Asian
>straight As in school while other people are dropping out
>add math major onto CS major
>last year of school coming up
>just got a new job as a researcher under the head professor with the largest grant
>always top of class, so my teachers recommended me
>life is better
>taking a 1 week break before research job and school starts
>living neet life like I used to
>no longer desirable
>still a shut in with no friends
>still hate people
>but my life is on track
>>25449080
I did, but I lost it all when I had to move to another country. Now I'm probably even worse than before.
Yeah mang, I've spent years being a neet before and been forced out of my situation. It's too spooky to go out of my own accord, but when your life is seriously threatened you just learn to do what has to be done and adapt no matter how crippling or miserible your anxiety is.
>>25456082
Same anon, I made a lot of friends and achieved mild popularity before my mental health due to spending too much time online sent me on the path of full retard and depression struck.
