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Hey guys can you give me a little fedeback on my poetry?
looks in the darkness
a poem by Louis DiMauro
Ask my self who am I,
I cant seem to find myself,
Get older, try, and try,
Over and over
Change who I am.
Now look at a myself and ask,
Really who do I want to be?....
Having no clues on the bord
Don't have excuses
Don't want any
Why do I ask
Who I am?
Well because the world is beautiful
Many cry like to thrive
Fairytale and rhymes
Questions and lies
Say that we live in
Worlds without times
Dark clouds, greed, war for minds that die, Issues of interest but my limit is denied
Restricted is the why or who am i
Questions repeated
Puzzled and treated
Ask myself who am i?
Learned and deleted,
Judged and have seen it,
Poisoned by the treason
We fell in to the mine
Money, shows, and crimes
The Hippocratic minds of his and i's
Is the fucked rhymes inspired hells owned by undead wines,
We climb up the rock like a bird who cant fly
All not knowing that we birds are mindless Chicken being fatted and for others delight
Waves transform clinching,
Jaws bloodshed bolts pricing ur misleading hid,
Dogs who claws at ur soul,
Dark and evil,
Clouds tears and fear's of losing to decides
Do we feel more swords clenching in our
lifes,
Feel the blood boil,
Water vs dark signs
Slowly easing at ur soul
Or did u see the night rising high,
Devil, red eyes, ur blinded by the why,
Why, why, why,... Is thire two sides?
Now u blindly,
Lost all of ur life,
Just one dark devil inside
Who am a I?
A storm in the night, rain fire to pass
Seen beauty from ur past
Two story's but one path
One steps fall down and one step is unknowns But hidden inside is the story we write,
Seeing the light is usually bright,
Because to reach to the sun we need to be blind.
Look at myself.........who am I?