/r9k/, please give me a reason to live. I feel like I'm too socially and emotionally fucked to improve.
This isn't a pity thread. Please just convince me that life is worth living.
>21 years old
>no friends
>kissless virgin
>4/10 face
>grew up poor and introverted
>zero confidence and crippling insecurities
>pissed away $50k into school and still haven't declared a major because nothing interests me
>want to have hobbies and interests but I have no natural talent in anything and get easily bored
>even my old hobbies like video games are wearing thin
>never been loved by a person that wasn't a family member
>never had a real conversation with a woman
>blonde hair
>people make weird disgusted faces at me when I attempt to be friendly
>people tell me I have blank emotionless eyes
>if I were able to by some grace of fucking god get a girlfriend, I'd most likely be overly clingy and scare her off
>father won't talk to me
>can barely use the phone without vomiting
>it's Christmas day and I'm alone
>>25235746
I'm sorry anon...there's really nothing to live for...
>>25235746
Kill yourself faggot. Do it right.
http://lostallhope.com/
Forge your soul in the fires of rejection and become a super-villain. That's what I'm doing and I'm 30.
>>25235746
Make friends with the homeless people they're fucking crazy and some wont want to talk but at least they're someone
>>25235746
Hey man I've been there
Anxiety is a bitch, I used to never leave my room. I had no job, no friends, nothing
I started seeing a therapist and I was able to overcome it.
If you want to live a more fulfilling life, you can do it, it'll just take some work, but it's completely worth it man.
Hang in there either way cuz right now your at your bottom and it won't get any worse but when you get up even if it's a baby step, you'll look back with pride at how far you've come.
I believe in you
Arbitrarly declare some sort of business degree, accounting if you like math, something else if you don't. You may not be interested in the field, but you'll money.
Hobbies you can also pick somewhat arbitrarily. I'd recommend cooking.
A job, even a shitty one, can help grant a sense of purpose, and help with cash.
Don't worry about the gf or the father. They might come around and if they don't, fuck em, you can still happy with what I described above. Good luck OP.
One of the shitty things that technology does is, it makes everyone's lives seem extremely glamorous.
The truth is that there are probably 100 "big" or biggish cities where you live, and the people who live in those cities seem to have remarkable lives, many friends, loving families, and all of their shit together.
But there are thousands of more small cities and towns, and the people who live in those places are not too different from you, not much more beautiful than you, not much more successful than you.
This isn't to say, "lmao you're not one of the chosen Chads" or "it's OK to suck." It's just that, because of technology, you're measuring yourself on a very skewed scale.
Being 21, friendless, and kissless isn't too bad. It's not great, sure, but it's not the end of the world. But you have two options: you think of it as the end of the world, at which point you'll never be able to change it; or you realize it's not a big deal, and you go on about your life.
>>25236065
But how do I go on? Sorry if this sounds desperate, but I feel like I have no supports. I can't be one of those people that goes their entire fucking life alone. Being loved is being valued. It's being cared for. I just want to mean something to someone else besides myself.
>>25235746
Eh, it's not like being dead would improve any of that. Even if you're suffering, you're experiencing something, and you have a chance at bettering your life.
The most concrete advice I can give at your current juncture is to get the fuck out of college. Just because you've pissed away a bunch of money doesn't mean you should piss away more. Move home and get whatever job you can. Some work experience should clear your head a little, and then when you go back you'll have a solid plan for exactly what you want to do.
>>25236130
Well anon, that sounds like a goal. All you need in a life is a goal and the wherewithal to plot out a path to it.
It'll be a hard climb, sure, but if you know where you're going you can start working towards it.
I stay alive just to see how everything turns out. I don't have much of a reason otherwise. I make enough money that I can sit and watch the world rotate around me without having to worry too much.
It's existence. If you're not reproducing, you might as well find a different purpose.
there's no inherit worth in life
no one can convince your autistic ass that there's something to live for
people can claim "live 5 urself" "jus b a gud person that will make u happi 4ever" "happiness cums frum within"
You need to know what you want first. From there you can find meaning. I want to do whatever I feel like, and I do. I'm a dropout shutin who spends his days jerking off, shit-posting, and playing video games.
Find what you want, and be specific about it. Do you want a girlfriend? A boyfriend? Girlfriend is very easy. Working out and getting a good haircut for your style makes things mountains simpler.
If it's too hard and you aren't willing to put in the effort to get what you want, then you must not want it very much. So either remove your pathetic self from the gene pool or find a different goal or aspiration. Maybe you're like me and find relative contentment in the typical basement dwelling lifestyle of porn and video-games all day. Maybe you might find that you get off on hitch-hiking across the country and being homeless. Maybe you're a womanizing sociopath who gets off on manipulating drunk girls into sleeping with him (it really isn't all that difficult if you aren't a complete idiot)
Quit being such a fucking faggot and just do whatever the fuck you want. I'd be much more worries about the inevitable civil wars we're going to be seeing in the next few decades.
>>25235746
Not all those who wander are lost. Remember, the blue lotus grows in the mud.
>>25236486
You meant inherent
Kill yourself
>>25236495
you'reselve*
You were brought into this world without your permission and society tried to sculpt you to think a certain way about everything, I think we all need to die.
>>25236486
This tbqh senpai... It's all about perspective. Even something as simple as silent contemplation can work wonder for the mind. Thus, delaying the inevitable decadence of the soul.
>>25236486
>Girlfriend is very easy.
hello yes I think I have been doing it wrong may I please see the tutorial
>>25236130
Everything you're saying is absolutely true. It's important to love and be loved. It's important to have a support system.
The thing you're not understanding is that it's fairly easy to create bonds, and it's even easier when you find the right people for you. Finding the courage and skill to do that isn't obvious, but it's worth it.
It's all about shifting your mentality. Going from:
>I can't connect with ANYONE because I'm unchangeably awful to my core.
to
>I can't connect with most people because I'm awful -- the leftover people are missed connections because I fuck up in certain small, changeable ways
to
>I can't connect with certain people because they just don't like who I am -- for some others, I just fuck up in ways that I can fix; and for the remaining people, there's too many variables involved to point the blame in my direction
And so on.
Yes, people can be terrifying and awful. But it's all worth it to find someone who genuinely understands you.
>>25236707
The best advice I can give to be socially attractive is to create a character, then play them like an actor would. Lie and cheat until you have enough life experience and social connections so you don't have to lie anymore, then keep lying.
If the reality is that at your core you are a completely unrelatable autist then you need to pretend to be relatable. Like I said, if you're bad at it get good at it. If you aren't willing to put in the research, the time, and the effort then don't bother. You aren't going to find the secret to social success in a fucking 4chan thread though, that I can assure you of.
>>25236777
>Lie and cheat until you have enough life experience and social connections so you don't have to lie anymore, then keep lying.
Shouldn't a girlfriend be the one person with whom you can be genuine and honest about who you truly are? At that point they aren't even in love with me, they're in love with my facade, there's still a wall between us even if she doesn't know.
I understand that's a bit naive but if I'm lying about who I even am, how can she be expected to tell the truth either? I lie to get people to like me, and I don't enjoy it. I feel like they can see right through my crap.
>>25235746
Fuck, my dad used to have that picture on the living room wall when I was a kid.
>>25236819
The only people that get to "jus b themselves" are people that are already desirable. If you aren't desirable then you need to become desirable.
You don't HAVE to become a fucking sociopath in order to get a girlfriend. You can workout and make money and get one. Ultimately you're fighting to be in the top percentile of men either way.
Lying to get people to like you is more of a stepping stone into success. It leads to money and social status. Once you have those things you can get away with dropping the facade because you've already established value for yourself.
