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>age 14
>been bullied all my life never had any friends
>diagnosed with high functioning autismo
>only ever play vidya
>no friends
>anheroisntsuchabadidea.jpg
>teased by family with "why don't you have any friends?" "You're a loner" etc
>make friends by coincidence and hang out with them at least biweekly
>feel like life isn't as shitty anymore
>still playing vidya erryday
>fast forward a year or two
>entire family thinks I'm gay for not showing an interest in girls
>get steady girlfriend
>she's smart (straight A's)
>she's pretty and outgoing
>i become outgoing too even though I'm extremely introverted
>hate every second of it
>still love her though so I put up with it
>slowly become more and more fed up with it
>she breaks up with me
>devastated
>drop out of school
>stop seeing friends
>nine months of spiraling into depression
>get back together with gf and start seeing friends again
>it gets better
>still hate being outgoing but don't tell anyone
>fast forward 3 years to now

I pretty much don't know what to do with myself. I can't stand being outgoing but I don't want to risk being alone again.
Don't really know why I wrote this I guess I just needed to get it off my chest