>ask girl out on sunday
>she says she cannot because she's attending two parties already
>ask her if she wants to go to a bar today
>she agrees
>the time is about to come
>she suggests another bar
>I refuse
>she says "im kind of feeling bad and the weather sucks right now i cant come"
>I tell her she's being gey
>she calls me a bully jokingly
>I say "okay would u agree if we agreed to your bar"
>she makes a status on facebook about how sad she is
>she says "i just wanna stay home and eat and cry on a couch"
>I say "okay are u free tuesday?"
>and she just responds with "christmas stuff"
>I say "huh? when are you free?"
>she's about to type a response but doesnt say anything
I really hate this kind of stuff. This happens to me all the time. It's not even when I make plans. People make plans with me and then they'll cancel it. This is something I never do and it pisses me off.
The thing is this girl is good friends with my brother. I was thinking of telling her off. But my brother would ask why I was so mean to her.
But I'm really angry right now. I'm so fed up with people doing this to me. Should I call her a bitch? Should I tell her that I hate it that she's not giving me a straight answer and to tell me straight up if she doesn't want to hang out with me? Or would that be too much?
I'm really sad right now bros :(. (And if you think she's young, she's actually 24)
>>25164839
not even asking whats wong
maybe if you didn't act so fucking autistic you could have a normal conversation with a gril
Jesus Christ you fucking autist leave her alone stop being so fucking mad. Literally zero emotional intelligence, stop being so fucking pushy trying to get a concrete date she's free out of her.
If you think she's trying to not go out with you, then stop pushing and move on. If you think it's something else have a little fucking understanding and give them a fucking break.
shes avoiding you
haha wow
>>25164839
you can't take social cues
OP is autistic
clear she was not interested/10
>>25165020
>stop being so fucking pushy trying to get a concrete date she's free out of her.
A concrete date? What do you mean by this?
I don't know what it is. When I met her at a party it was obvious to me that she liked me. But I had to go home early. I don't know what it is. But the reason I'm upset is literally everyone I try to talk to never responds to my texts or anything. I'm never pushy. It's just that I'm usually very ncie and never ask or push people into anything. It's just that lately no one has been keeping their promises to hang out with me that I'm getting mad.
I just feel like blocking her and deleting her along with the rest of the people that do this because I feel like they're not my real friends
Op you're beyond basic nigga
She doesn't show you shit and if you weren't retarded you'd get the social cues and fuck off
>>25164937
>>25165020
>>25165052
She's sending you a clear message and you are not picking up on it.
What she is doing is normiespeak for: I do not have any interest in you and I am letting you down gently without explicitly saying so and I expect you to understand this, stop asking me, and fade off out of my life as much as possible
>>25165109
>>25165107
>>25165064
Okay, she should have just said "no". Why can't people just be straight forward, I'd appreciate that a whole lot more.
Just last week another girl invited me to drink, then she didn't respond on the same day. It's not like I was the one asking her.
Or my friend asking me to hang out because we haven't in such a long time, then saying oh sorry man, can you wait another 2 hours.
it's just stuff like this... When I make plans, I like to be straight forward and I arrive precisely at the time I set up.
>>25165098
>What do you mean by this?
I mean asking her when she's next free, I see that as akin to asking a customer how much they're willing to pay.
>it was obvious to me that she liked me
You're clearly autistic so you probably read the situation wrong. She probably was just being nice to you because your her friend's brother.
If people aren't responding to you it's possible they just have busy social lives, much busier than yours and it's difficult for them to find a place for you.
It's also possible they just don't want to hang out with you because you're autistic. I'm not trying to be mean here, just honest.
>>25165268
And some more things
>Okay, she should have just said "no"
This is considered rude. It's a social norm to be polite rather than just tell somebody "no". Is that how it should be? Is that how I want it to be? No. But that's how it is and you're just going to have to accept that.
People have busy lives, and plans change. Sure, there are people that aren't so wishy-washy with plans, but it's not a personal attack against you if they are.
>>25165268
It sucks. No one is going to deny it, but it's the nature of the game. Guys and gals do this tbqh.
>>25165370
I didn't know I was autistic. I really hope I'm not. That would suck :( Are you someone that has lots of plans/friends or are you in the same boat as me?
she's not interested, couldn't have made it any clearer
>>25165098
>I just feel like blocking her and deleting her along with the rest of the people that do this because I feel like they're not my real friends
Don't feel, do it. There is no need to maintain relationships with people like this. She has never and will never give a single care about you.
>>25165466
What do you mean the game?
It just sucks that this board is right. That I need to demonstrate "high value" to get friends and stuff. Seriously now that I think of it. The only times people have hung out with me, it seemed like they were just using me to buy them drinks and stuff.
General rule: you ask a girl if she wants to do something on a specific day (don't let her pick the day) if she can't, see if she suggests a different time. If not, that's bad news but maybe not lost hope. Try ONE MORE time to give her a specific day, and if she rejects again, and offers no time when she's free, she's not interested.
If a girl wants to hang out with you, she'll either make it work or find a new time. This girl was dropping major "fuck off" hints
>>25165514
ugh I feel like it'd be a mean thing to do.
The reason I thought she was interested was because she was suggesting another bar to me with lots and lots of enthusiasm and telling me to go to that one. And that she intially agreed. I wouldn't have gotten upset if she didn't cancel at the last minute like so many people have done to me.
It's a lot better for me when people just say "no". When i actually put on my best clothes, comb my hair and people say "no", I just feel so shitty. Like I wasted my time. I literally saved up 500 dollars these past few months to spend on anything anyone would want if they were hanging out with me.
But everyone has been turning me down. I could never picture myself making plans with someone and canceling them.
>>25165575
When I asked her on sunday. She did say "I got 2 parties to go to. Later this week!?"
That's why I asked again today
>>25165502
I have a small group of close friends. They invite me out. Nobody else asks me anywhere, and they all have friends outside of the small group that they hang out with. I never ask other people out because I don't want to be pushy. I know that if I did I would run into a lot of the same problems you would most of the time, particularly with people I haven't known for very long or very well (which is everybody outside of my core group).
>>25165523
If this is really true, and people only ask you to hang out if you're going to pay for something for them, then I'm really sorry but you truly have no friends. You can expect (and accept this as okay) with women (particularly ones you're trying to date), but if this is how your friends treat you, then they're not your friends. I know that may fucking suck to realise, but it'll be easier on your wallet and your soul if you realise it now.
>>25165642
If people are cancelling at the last moment, they either never intended to go out with you at all and only made the plans then cancelled because that way they don't have to say no and you retain some deniability (m-maybe they really just felt sick) or their reasons are actually legitimate and you've just been unlucky recently. People will go to extraordinary measures to avoid saying no, and from everything you've told me, I doubt the reasons are legitimate.
And saving up money to spend on things for people if they want them is sick. Stop this behaviour. It makes you seem desperate and like a doormat, not really traits people look for in friends. Which means they'll just use you when convenient then leave you. They might even feel guilty for doing it after in which case they'll just stop hanging out with you all together so they can stop exploiting you.
Sorry man, I don't really have many solutions to your problems, but boy do you have problems.
>>25165642
>I literally saved up 500 dollars these past few months to spend on anything anyone would want if they were hanging out with me.
FUCKING NO. Look man. You save that money for yourself. You never allow _anyone_ to leech off of you, ever. People will run you the fuck over like no tomorrow. This doesn't attract the type of people that you want around you anyway.
After reading this bread, my suggestion for you is to start doing things that interest you. Develop passions for things outside of these types of people. If you're ever going out, you hit someone up ONCE. If they don't reply or if they flake, forever keep them at arms length distance. They will never be on your level since they ever decided to doubt it in the first place. (Don't ever say this shit, just intrinsically understand it.)
Also, never retaliate on people that flake. If they ever hit you up down the road, just tell them a firm "No." It might burn inside initially, but that burn is your backbone growing. It eventually gets easier to spot and detect the types of people who are going to flake. You become better at assessing someone's character as time passes.
>>25165800
Dubs of truth.
>>25165642
Oh, and don't delete or block people. Just stop engaging with them. Blocking/deleting seems petty and word might get around. There's just as much chance they won't notice, but you never know.
>>25164839
i try to initiate things, they try to reschedule
i try to be flexible, no reply
i try to extend an olive branch, i get ignored
literally the only times good things happen with people in my life are when I just wait for them to show up in mine. It's super gay. The worst is when I send someone a snapchat or something to be nice and they never respond. literally just take a picture of your feet and write "lol."
I understand that most people are self-absorbed and I'm probably less anxious and more emotionally mature than they are, but it gets fucking old. I'm starting to embrace cocoon mode. I only hang out with like two people anymore. I'm sick of making effort that is never reciprocated. But now I'm just doing the same shit as everyone else. At least I try not to be dodgy with my commitments once I've made them.
I want to just cut people out of my life but I also don't want to be a friendless loser.
>>25165830
>>25165800
This sucks man reading all this stuff is depressing me a lot right now. But I actaully never actually found this girl attractive at all actually. She had a bit of a pot belly and her face was like 6/10. I just thought she had an interest in me. I was just so desperate that I asked her out even though I don't find her attractive.
I also had a few problems with stuff she did like she was snorting coke in the back room at the after party. And I just find that disgusting.
But it's like almost every college or any party I go to people are always doing coke and stuff. And it's not my scene. But I just go there to meet people even though I'm not into drinking either. I just go there to meet people. I wish I could find people that don't do drugs and are more straight forward and just want to do fun stuff.
But I guess I'm also a boring person that never talks much. So no one would want to hang out with me anyway
>>25165922
Checked. Being friendless doesn't mean you're a loser. If you're actively doing shit with your life it just means you have priorities that you're putting in front of "muhhh friends."
I'm not sure how old you are, but the older you get, the more you realize that you piss away a lot of time catering to other people rather than focusing on yourself.
>>25165955
The fuck is with all these dubs tonight? Checked.
Anyway, you're looking in the wrong places man. You need to actively develop a hobby outside of these degenerates. I know it seems like a great way to meet people (by going to parties), but it's really not. It's a good way to meet a lot of people you want to kick in the teeth after a few months of knowing. Don't be down about it, just look around in different places like clubs or activities. Pick up rock climbing, kickboxing, throwing clay, art classes, etc. You'll find people out there.
>>25164839
Jesus dude give up, she's not interested.
>>25165922
Do you take a picture of your feet or do you ask them?
>>25166021
Pick up rock climbing, kickboxing, throwing clay, art classes
OMG. I think I understand now. I guess i was looking in the wrong place.
Can you give me any advice on how to maintain conversations and be interesting. Just like you, I have always, always been the follower never the leader.
>>25166060
I already gave up. But I don't want to make this mistake again.
I want to know how to tell if someone's actually interested. I don't want to be pushy because now I feel like shit
>>25166114
Nigga who ever I said I was ever a follower? You just legitimately have to listen to what people are saying and how they are behaving. That's it. You should be conversing with them to entertain yourself, not them. You're not some tap dancing monkey.
>>25165955
Don't lower your standard, especially down to pot-bellied coke fiend. Stop going to these parties to meet people. I personally would still go, just for pleasure of observing a party, but if you're doing it to make friends but you don't really like these people you're wasting your time.
Join a club relevant to your hobbies. Take a class in something. Meet people that way.
>>25164839
superior female opinion coming in
she wanted you to ask to come over and cuddle with her instead of going out for drinks. the way you said things you made it seem like you only, only wanted to get drinks and she probably felt you just wanted to get her drunk to have sex with her. lots of guys do that - almost all of them, that's their tactic.
you should have been more thoughtful and sympathetic when she said she wanted to stay home, and was sad, and asked what you could have done to help. how cold, man...
>>25166292
It's just strange to me. Like in all the movies this is the kind of party all the cool people go to. But I just don't enjoy it, but I really want to "fit in".
I don't understand dancing either, I'm always too ashamed to do it. And I'm too shy to talk to people.
But, yeah a club would be cool as someone in this thread suggested earlier. I'll definitely try that out.
>>25166361
I'm actaully a non drinker. The only reason I suggested that is because the day I met her she was smoking weed and doing coke. I just didn't want to suggest something boring. I actually didn't ahve sex on my mind at all. I never do actaully. I just wanted to have someone to hang out with.
Anyway the day I met her she had a drink in her hand, and it was a drink I drank earlier and she said "should I drink it" and I said "go ahead it tastes good".
Anyway I thought she liked me cause even at one point she asked me to flush the toilet for her after she peed.
She would always approach me and talk to me about something and even at one point shared a very personal sad story about her sister.
I should have asked her how she was feeling I realize my mistake now. But everyone made it clear she doesn't like me. Please don't give me hope, I just want to forget about this girl and find a new one.
>>25164839
>
she's not into you faggot
you're clingy as fuck
geez
>>25164839
>
you sound like the biggest fucking faggot
no wonder you have no luck with women
learn to fucking deal in social situations
holy fuck you're omega as SHIT
>>25165268
nobody just 'says no'
its called reading between the lines
she invited me to drink = she wants to use you for money to buy her drinks
>>25166374
Congratulations, you actually want something deeper than the popularity pushed by Hollywood.
Dancing is just flailing about, nobody really cares if you're good or bad. It's 100% a confidence thing. Also, people's preconceived notions will determine if they deem your dancing to be fun or lame.
Don't listen to this
>>25166361
The girl was not interested in you. She didn't want to cuddle you. She may have thought you only wanted to get her drunk and fuck her, but she sure as shit didn't want you to come over to cuddle with her.
>>25166446
hey m8
check this out
reddit.com/r/theredpill
read the side bar
you'll realize where you went wrong with women
women aren't how you think they are
theres shit NOBODY ever told you about getting girls
check it out
apply it
>>25166563
Is this a conspiracy group?
What is this shit nobody ever told me about girls?
>>25166563
>literally reddit
ok kid
>>25166598
>>25166638
you guys have literally never heard of the red pill?
You know how you've been told your entire life
'oh just be a nice guy and girls will like you eventually man, that perfect girl will come along eventually, you'll meet that girl someday'
it's fucking bullshit
ever wonder why girls like jerks?
Why she chooses to get heartbroken to some player than even give you the time of day even though you'd take a bullet for her?
Because ALL WOMEN like certain traits
check it out
literally just read the sidebar
it'll make you a better man, people will fucking notice you taking control of your life and you'll get chicks
>>25165922
> I don't want to be a friendless loser
From the looks of things, you are a loser with no real friends who just can't read between the lines. Man up and stop being so dependant on other people for your personal happiness.
Literally every person in this thread has gave you the same advice yet you still spout off long paragraphs of reasoning and counter arguments - indictIng to me that you are: beta, needy or both.
>>25166710
What do these jerks do? When I look at the sidebar there's so many god damn links.
I don't want to read all these ebooks to find out their pseudo science bullshit. But what you're saying so far is making sense
>>25166758
This poster wasnt me
>>25166710
I'm aware of the concept redtard, but this page is akin to PUA bullshit. It's cringeworthy, every section of this page. It's not that it's necessarily false, but the way it is presented is fucking dreadful.
>>25166784
I replied to the wrong post, it was a different needy bitch
>>25166789
>>25166762
oh of course
it's not a guide bros
this is just a community of guys bettering themselves
theres no 'magic' step to getting girls
focus on yourself and the rest follows
at the end of day we're all human
you ever been in a room
and you could definitely tell who the leader was?
In a situation
maybe one of those gay group activities
or in your class
you always knew who the leader or the popular one was?
women are like that too
they can sense who the leader is
your actions send off signals on what kind of guy you are
if you act a certain way, aka ALPHA girls will be more inclined to like you
just be more alpha
girls are born into a grade
girls live life on easy mode
they can do nothing and still survive
you can work on yourself though
lift
empower yourself
you can do anything senpai
its sorta pseudoscience shit
but its not that gay /r/seduction PUA shit
fucking hilarious, i got a mate name shayne (dude) who is exactly like this whenever we all wana hangout or go get drinks
>>25166821
lmao i have like 2 or 3 clutch friends that i see a lot and like, it just doesnt feel like its worth expanding my social horizions beyond them based on my experiences.
I'm not a needy bitch, I'm honestly just trying to be nice and reach out to people in a non-autistic way. I'm an extremely confident person and I've been told that I'm more intimidating than anything.
>>25166114
i literally just gave that as an example of some low effort way that people could reciprocate. no im not so hopelessly autistic that i ask people on snapchat to send me pics of their feet.
>>25166021
im in my 20s. for years i havent given a fuck about people or their feelings but im trying to improve, and so far it is NOT worth the effort.
>>25166866
haha dude i think we have the same friend
>>25164839
throw rocks through her window
