who /AttractiveToGirlsButCantDoShit/ here?
>girl in one of my uni clubs obviously into me
>catch her looking at me
>makes excuses to be around me
>starts conversations, which i end with one word answers
then:
>club takes several hour trip somewhere
>she sits beside me
>i dont say a damn word to her the whole trip
>she ends up talking to other people and having fun the whole time
>she's now uninterested in me
what the fuck am i supposed to say to someone i barely know? i have several other examples of this happening to me. for the same reason i have nearly no male friends too.
>>25056637
Wat am I looking at here?
me. I'm KV and am pussy despite getting attention from roasties
>>25056637
>what the fuck am i supposed to say to someone i barely know?
Start with "hi"
You're approaching this problem from the direction of someone who thinks that social skills are an intellectual exercise, "what do I say" as if you're trying to solve a puzzle. Its not like that. Treating it as an intellectual problem or trying to plan for some kind of outcome is the easiest way to fuck up social interaction. Because you make your shitty plan, and then they immediately destroy it by saying something that you didn't account for, so then you drop your spaghetti as you try to salvage your plan.
You need to actively learn social skills, since this seems to be your problem, and you can learn social skills unless you're genuinely autistic. I did, I couldn't even hold eye contact with people when I started because i was so anxious. But as long as you practice you'll get there in the end.
Read how to win friends and influence people by dale carnegie, it will teach you the principals of conversation. Read the definitive book of body language by alan and barbera pease, it'll teach you how to read body language, which is important because something like 70% of communication is non-verbal.
Here's a video of a talk that might help you get started:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b-a1jXgAsQI
>>25056801
>and you can learn social skills unless you're genuinely autistic
lmao i am genuinely autistic. but, im high functioning and relatively normal compared to other people with autism. ill read the books you suggested. im big into self improvement so its funny that you'd suggest that. thanks mate
>>25057072
Youre going to fuck up a lot and chances are people will mess with you too keep that in mind and youll be fine, reaching normiehood aint easy
>>25057141
i know man. starting at 19 years old and learning all the subtle social cues and skills that normies naturally learned while growing up wont be easy. but im not one to quit
>>25056801
>I did, I couldn't even hold eye contact with people when I started because i was so anxious. But as long as you practice you'll get there in the end.
can you explain your story? were you already successful in other aspects of life but not socially? are you attractive?
>>25057288
No I was a fat neet 25 year old kissless virgin, living in squalor with my hoarder mother. On my 25th birthday I had a RREEEEEEEE meltdown over how shit my life was after a long period of deep depression where I'd literally just try to sleep just so that I didn't have to be awake. I don't remember it too clearly.
Anyway, I somehow decided to change. I joined a gym, started eating right, did voluntary work due to having nothing to put on a resume, started reading and practicing social skillsand pua. Just over a year later I'd gotten a job, moved out and lost my virginityto a girl who was admittedly kinda fat. I'm now I'm 30 and can function socially and talk to girls easily, trying to get a non-shit job after teaching myself programming.
But the fact that I did change means that according to r9k I was just a normie all along :^)
