So today I was mugged. Listen to my story. >Be me, walking

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Anonymous
2015-12-13 01:37:00 Post No. 24943528
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Anonymous 2015-12-13 01:37:00 Post No. 24943528 [Report]

So today I was mugged. Listen to my story.
>Be me, walking downtown on a shitty street.
>Make a turn down gravel road behind a convenience store.
>Inb4 worst mistake of my life.
>A homeless man crosses my path, he looks crazy.
>Asks me if I have any cash.
>Fml.jpg
>He pulls out a knife. Repeats the question.
>mfw I piss my pants right in front of him.
>He laughs at me and sucker punches me to the ground.
>Everythings a blur. But then I feel him pull the wallet from my pants. Seriously, fml.
>Then he unzips his pants.
>OhfuckI'mGonnaBeRaped.png
>Pulls his dick out, pisses on my face.
>"You're a pussy-ass faggot. Go home and change your pants."
>mfw I stumble home covered in smelly piss.
>mfw mommy has to help me change my dirty clothes.
>I want to an hero.

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Anonymous 2015-12-13 01:40:32 Post No.24943602
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Anonymous 2015-12-13 01:40:32 Post No.24943602 [Report]

BAHAHAHAHAHAHHHA

You shoulda just turned and ran dude.

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Anonymous 2015-12-13 01:43:07 Post No.24943660
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Anonymous 2015-12-13 01:43:07 Post No.24943660 [Report]

>>24943602
I was scared stiff tho... I wanted to run, but I was too scared...

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Anonymous 2015-12-13 01:43:26 Post No.24943663
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Anonymous 2015-12-13 01:43:26 Post No.24943663 [Report]

>>24943528
you sound like you deserved it

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Anonymous 2015-12-13 01:44:17 Post No.24943691
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Anonymous 2015-12-13 01:44:17 Post No.24943691 [Report]

That's why you carry a gun

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Anonymous 2015-12-13 01:44:33 Post No.24943700
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Anonymous 2015-12-13 01:44:33 Post No.24943700 [Report]

>>24943528
Muggings are super common were I live, but they stopped trying when I turned 16/17, was 6'2 by then. Pretending you'r autistic (should come natural to you) and keep walking like you never heard anything is always a good out.

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Anonymous 2015-12-13 01:46:38 Post No.24943740
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Anonymous 2015-12-13 01:46:38 Post No.24943740 [Report]

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>>24943528
You're lucky he didn't pound your boipussy and give you aids

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Anonymous 2015-12-13 01:47:15 Post No.24943755
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Anonymous 2015-12-13 01:47:15 Post No.24943755 [Report]

>>24943528
Did you at least tickle his balls a little while you swallowed his piss?
Be nice to your daddy anon

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Anonymous 2015-12-13 01:54:57 Post No.24943908
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Anonymous 2015-12-13 01:54:57 Post No.24943908 [Report]

>>24943528

Did you taste his piss, fag? or did you try to spit it all out first?

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Anonymous 2015-12-13 01:58:07 Post No.24943984
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Anonymous 2015-12-13 01:58:07 Post No.24943984 [Report]

>>24943660

Scared of a fucking hobo who probably hasn't eaten in days? A god damn teenager could beat the shit out of your average homeless guy. The fuckers have no muscle mass and weak bones.

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Anonymous 2015-12-13 01:58:39 Post No.24943997
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Anonymous 2015-12-13 01:58:39 Post No.24943997 [Report]

>>24943602
>>24943528
Ya OP a malnourished old hobo wouldn't be able to follow you unless you're a fatass.