are you mentally ill? have you been to the loonybin?
post here
nomies get out REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEA
>>24893839
your dumb
stupid
They sent me to the addiction ward because there was no room elsewhere. Spent the whole time talking to methheads, junkies, and sassy black alcoholics. Philly has a nice assortment of crazies.
Howling mad schizophrenic , been in the state hospital (involuntary) four times since i was 14. Now 24 (no ssi , I work unlike some of you lazy niggers. ) What would you like to know?
>>24894413
why dont you collect disability
do you like anti psychotic injections?
>>24893839
I've gone inpatient twice. So long as you aren't stupid it isn't too hard to get out. You just lie through your teeth and take whatever meds they give you.
Actually improving though. That's the challenge.
>>24894447
Because when you actually insane (instead of a whiny weak bitch) it is hard to fill out/ keep up with/ and finish out with all that paperwork. It is easier for me to get a job , hold it til I have an episode, then get another job.
No I do not like the injections , but I really dislike taking haldol , trazadone , and effexor also. Hence why I end up homeless alot. Not good feels anon. Take your meds.
I always tell my story about how I escaped, how I had a police chopper after me while I running through the woods barefoot, how I nearly died twice from a car crash, and from having such low blood sugar levels, how I got caught again, how I got into a fight with one of the patients while the nurses turned their heads because he was such a prick, how one of the patients walked towards then nurses pants around the ankles cock in hand jerk walking, how we managed to smuggle drugs in, how one of the patients managed to climb onto the roof then jumped and much more but no one replies, I don't know why.
Fuckers, now I'm going to bed.
schizoaffective disorder here
I've been twice just this year to inpatient, about a week each time.
desu I really like it and wish I could stay there forever, it's so safe and comfy and orderly.
>psych ward refuses to admit me because I'm not "serious enough" about my suicidal thoughts
>>24894606
get a social worker
I meet with one every month and she filled out the paperwork for me for my disability
>>24894606
I'm gonna fucking kill you watch your back.
>>24894669
protip
use the keyword tonight
IE im going to hang myself TONIGHT
>>24894606
this >>24894691 desu fampai
I'm >>24894619 and I meet with my new psychiatrist and my new case worker in about a week.
she's supposed to help me fill out paperwork to apply for housing, food stamps, disabirity, etc, and to just keep track of my general wellbeing, help me try to get a job, help me get groceries, whatever I need.
>>24894714
I am an Angel of the Lord God , I will drink your soul before you even get close enough little boy.
>>24894746
Thanks man I might need to look into this , but I have been making good money with my sign company . If I break down again I might. I just can't accept help. Being beaten by my father and told i am a weak little faggot everyday made me very....independent.
>>24894934
I'm from the devil you weak little faggot
>>24894619
I know that feel
I would always say yes when they asked me if I was having suicidal thoughts and I would have conversations with my self so it seemed like I was hearing voices but I would always deny it and they would never believe me
I am schizophrenic but without a diagnosis, I can just barely will it away. I have rants and delusions all the time, but nobody knows because I diligently remind myself that these feelings I get from the tiny voices aren't real.
I almost got caught once last year of high school befause I was seeing ants all over my backpack and picking them off all day when theyre were none, they just thought i was on drugs eventually
>>24894960
someone needs a hug :^)
>>24895000
when I did acid for the second time I ended up doing 4 hits on a school night
I was still tripping balls when I was time to go to school and I ended up telling everyone how great acid was and how I was on a shit load not even thinking about it
I even told my teacher like an idiot and I got sent to the principles office and they called and ambulance and took me to the hospital
when I go to the hospital they injected me with something and the trip instantly ended I was mad for a week and kept making suicide suggestions to the teacher that reported me and the school said they were death threats and I had to stay in the psych ward for a week
most of the doctors kept saying acid was bad and I would argue with them except for this one doctor who im pretty sure has done acid because he knew a lot of shit and agreed that it was cool
>>24894960
Then I shall bind you hand and foot, and cast you into darkness until the day of judgment. Read the book bitch , I win in the end.
>>24894960
You really think it's worth going to prison over? No way you're getting away with murder in 2015, friend
Obsessive-compulsive here. Refuse meds, never been institutionalized obviously
>when you can't hold a conversation because you keep repeating a phrase over and over in your head that'll magically stop you from [bad thing]
>when you can't look at trees because you feel the need to cover up the end of every branch with your hands to "stop it from being sharp"
>when you can't jerk off using your imagination because unwanted faces keep popping up
>when you divide the sidewalk into imaginary thirds between each square and step only on the imaginary thirds
>and then watch people walking later on getting rustled when they break that pattern
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
>>24895433
lol i do that with sidewalks too man
>>24895000
I hope it doesn't get worse for you anon.
>>24895433
>and then watch people walking later on getting rustled when they break that pattern
It doesn't matter if other people do it, remember it's just from your perspective not theirs.
>>24893839
I'd love to.
Nothing would give me so much more satisfaction than to go out of my mind or to lose my mind, because my mind is simple and boring and stupid.
How can I induce a psychotic episode?
Don't sleep for 72+ hours?
I don't have any money for drugs, or anymore contacts for drugs.
Actually I do have some Salvia but that doesn't last nearly long enough to do anything long-term.
Been to the loony bin about 10 times now, it's mostly junkies. Every now and then you get the occasional actually insane person or borderline retard and all the other patients make fun of them. The worst part is the food, honestly, it's not so bad besides that. Last time I was in there The Dark Knight came on and I started dying during the CIA scene. Got a lot of weird looks.
>>24895182
This is a box with text in it, but it also breathes and is conscious of your presence. Like many other boxes with text in them.
>>24895785
How do you keep getting into there?
>Last time I was in there The Dark Knight came on and I started dying during the CIA scene. Got a lot of weird looks.
lol
Yes. been twice in an underage ward a few years ago. 17 at both times. met nice people. some injections etc. not too bad desu senpai.
>>24896059
>How do you keep getting into there?
Don't do drugs kiddos.
>>24896340
what kind of drugs
rov
>>24896518
Speedballs and RC psychs.
For 3 days when I tried to kill myself with pills, when I was 21.
>midterms
>attending counseling because it's free at my uni so why not
>fuck up trying to hang myself because I'm retarded
>appointment the next day
>ten minutes before it starts
>start panicking
>if I don't tell him about it I'll be an insincere asshole
>if I do then might get sent to a psych ward
>can't decide so I pussy out and leave
>dropped all contact with counselor
>haven't made an appointment since
Did I fuck up? Would I have gotten sent to a psych ward? Would it have even been that bad If I had?
>>24895150
You're probably gone but they likely injected you with some kind of benzo.
>>24897654
Yep. They would have sent you.
I'm a collegefag too and all out mental health services are free too. After 9 weeks I got sent to a counselor. Going to see how it goes
>>24897654
It's not so bad, there are horror stories but that's just because they deal with a lot of patients who have mental problems, so obviously there's gonna be some problems. It's mostly just boring. There's no internet, the TV gets mindless, you can't go outside much, the group meetings are really pointless. Sometimes it's good to have that break from the outside world and have some time to think things over without the stresses of everyday life.
>>24893839
Yeah. Been about 4 times. I'm off my meds :)
>>24898815
same
fuck those pills
>>24899169
*high five* fight the mind control brother!
>go full schizo
>sister drives me to the hospital
>explain about hallucinations
>hospital intercom is talking about me!
>no wait, that was just paranoia
>admitted etc, drugs and sleepytime
>wake up for 3am turkey sandwich
>some guy points me to the ward
>nurse recommends more sleepytime
no, i will wait in the rec room
>okay... you can watch tv if you want
no, i will read the informational packets
>o-okay then anon
>hear whispers down the hallways
>other patients talking to each other
>more and more waking up
>they are preparing to rush me
>arrange chairs and tables in barricade
>somehow smuggle metal knife i found
>macgyver packet into papertube
>staples into deadly spitballs
>nurse finds me and i explain
>she convinces me to take a pill
>wake up at 8am with everyone
>we all file into the rec room together
>preparations all still there untouched
>mfw guy yell "WHAT THE FUCK IS ALL THIS?"
>>24893839
Yes lads, 3 times total, once for 5 days, although it was quite the comfy experience
>>24893839
I've been for suicidal tendencies 4 times, it's actually quite enjoyable. Although I do miss the internet when I'm in there
>>24893839
This is my first time here in r9k honestly.
And i gotta say this is a truly pathetic board of whiny cunts who just have a giant circlejerk of self-loathing and pity. Its disgusting. How have we not nuked this board yet? When will all /r9k/ users kill themselves. You are the true cancerous tumor of 4chan, fuck you should just attach yourselves to reddit.
My main board is /pol/ btw for those of you who are curious.
>>24899838
Fuck off if you don't like it.
>>24899913
You fuck off you whiny pathetic NEET cunt please kill yourself in the hopes of bettering the human gene pool just a hair.
were already overpopulated anyhow
we dont need some self loathing crazy fag
There is no place to go for us mentally ill but prison or dead. Everyone just wants to ignore it, you can't see it, its an invisible wound. People would just wish it would go away. When you're mentally ill you're not a person anymore.
>>24900026
>overpopulated
I thought someone from /pol/ would know better
>>24900106
I'm with you man. I just want to be a person again. In my crazy mind I tell myself everything will work itself out in the afterlife.
>>24900270
>yfw your just as autistic as ever when your dead
>>24899622
probably should've watched the TV anon.
I have a really stiff face right now and I'm on anti-psychotics. Do I go to a hospital or something, or should I wait to see if it gets worse?
>tfw refusing treatment because stupid roasties do nothing to help me and keep calling me psychotic
>>24900583
take benadryl it should go away
I got stabbed in the leg by a 40 yo crackwhore I was stomping. Told the hospital I cut myself for attention. Promised I learned my lesson and wouldn't ever do it again. They were super nice actually. The paramedic guy was super cute, and an old lady in the crazy ward gave me a nice sandwich and some soup. I saw some asian dude freaking out banging his head on the metal door trying to get out.
They gave me some anti suicide pamphlets and paid for my cab ride home.
Thats the closest I ever got to staying in a psych ward. 10/10 would have my leg sewn up by cute paramedic, given free food, and sent home expense paid again.
>>24900696
Please sudoku for real and get out
>>24900777
Nah I'm good homie.
>>24893839
Hi trent. Remind me about this
>>24897654
Depends on your country.
I'm in Australia and spent ages lying about the extent of my suicidal thoughts out of fear of ending up on suicide watch again, but it surprisingly hasn't happened again. Days after telling my dr about a failed attempt I wasn't admitted, ended up voluntarily in one recently when I was super suicidal.
From what I read online it seems a lot easier to end up in psych wards for this kind of thing in the US than here.
It wasn't too bad, it was nice to get away from life for a while
>>24901025
its because your healthcare system is broke
>>24901321
yea and so are you
Never been committed, but I did a partial program and a course of shock treatments. Not that anyone cares, but I'd be happy to answer questions.
>>24900228
I'm not the guy you replied to, but is it not true? There are way too many fucking people.
>>24901626
did they work?
>>24901640
Fuck, no. Well, I don't think so. My mom would disagree. They gave me wicked headaches and ruined my memory for a good while. It's still not as good as it used to be, I think. I think the treatments just made me dumber overall, but I must just be paranoid.
That said, the actual experience was pretty fucking nice. I had nurses looking after me and stuff, and lying there in that soft, comfy bed while they worked on me was relaxing. It's probably the opposite for most people, but I'm kind of a freak. One of the nurses always covered me in a warm blanket while the other people hooked me up to stuff, and it was cozy. I know they were just doing their jobs, but it was nice to feel like people gave a shit about me.
I can't speak for anyone else, but it didn't work for me. All things considered, I wouldn't do it if I could go back and change the past.
>>24900777
you first sonny
Going in monday for first time. Any advice?
>>24901927
If you want specific types of drugs e.g. benzos or stimuilants don't ask for it by name or you'll be labelled a drug seeker
>>24901927
what are you going in for
also dont let them take your blood and they will give you drugs
>>24901943
this dont ask for any meds just punch yourself in the head
you fucking nerds
dont take crazy pills
>>24894610
I replied anon.
How did you guys smuggle drugs in?
>>24902607
put them in your butt
eat drugs then die
Never was institutionalized/never got treatment. Anorexic here, used to be a bit bulimic too but I put a stop to that when I read about what it does to your esophagus and liver and teeth and shit, I eat maybe around 800 calories a day, not as bad as it was but I still force myself to try to eat, I usually can just forget a meal. I'm not one of those anorexics who obsesses over every calorie that goes into my body because I'm smart enough to have a schedule where I can curb the pains and still feel full without eating too much, I've been doing this for so long that it's pretty much second nature to me and my body is pretty used to running on low calories. Just now, I made myself a sandwich, it was just gonna be 2 bread slices but I got inspired to throw some tiny slivers of balogna and a cheese slice on. It's not much but it's probably gonna be my big meal of the day, I had some crappy soup earlier that I couldn't finish because it was so rich. I can answer more questions because I have a lot to say but I have a very cloudy brain and already feel like I'm just rambling, but yeah I sleep a lot. I might be getting better, can't really tell. I'm also depressed and have general anxiety as well as suspected aspergers and probably OCPD but the last few times I tried to get help they either were really snarky and rude to me and not helpful at all it made me mad, or I got scared. One day maybe I can be better. This sandwich is taking forever to eat.
>>24903187
just go to the loonybin and get a feeding tube
>>24903216
can't I hate those niggas and I can feed myself, maybe when it gets worse but the only time I went to the hospital was when I cut myself a few times and that time I had a seizure, probably related but I got my shit together after that.
Anyone had to stay in the hospital as a kid,because you refused to go to school?
How are you now?
>>24903331
I did because I told my special ed teacher I wanted to be dead
im still an autistic loser
>>24903396
nice spelling lol
u r all cancer
>>24903710
no u r da cancer
this thread is full of cunts
>>24904220
id*ot
>>24904331
reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
dont call me that
>>24903553
>>24903710
>>24903964
>>24904220
>>24904331
>>24904656
get the fuck off samefag
>accepted to be in psych ward because of suicide attempt
>they took all my belongings and give me a stupid shirt and pants too small for me (I am 6'8)
>my room was cold as fuck, I couldn't manage to sleep
>they didn't let me take a shower before sleep and I was dirty from my day of work (I was admitted at midnight)
>every hour the nurses came with their fucking lamps to see if I'm dead or not
>didn't tell them I was in utter panic because afraid they would give me some hardcore meds
>hear screaming from other rooms
>1 week I manage to not ask for anything and act like everything was fine because they were already giving me unknown meds and I didn't want to end up like some of the zombies here
>no books, one tv with the same music clips over and over and some of the zombies slowly dancing in front
>boredom and sadness like never before
>visit from my family a week after, burst into tears to let me out
>finally out and traumatized more than ever
>suicide thoughts intensify
>>24904821
should of took the meds being a zombie is great
EMT here, stop calling the suicide hotline or telling your friends via text about your fucking problems, talk on 4chan only. I say this because the hotline can triangulate your number and send a cop and ambulance out there.
It doesn't matter what, if I go out there your coming with me. You don't have a choice, and I don't want to take you. I have no psychiatric training and odds are your a frequent flyer so I'll just encourage you to kill yourself anyway in the back of the ambulance.
Also because PD came out there and made a report, it will show up on a background check that you've had a run in with the law, so good luck getting a fucking serious job.
>>24905078
what brand of restraints do you use
I have experienced the leather humane restraints the neoprene posey ones
>>24905119
Triangle bandages, and the cop with the gun usually keeps people scared enough to not try anything.
>>24905078
>It will show you have had a run in with the law
Fuck.
>>24905194
its not like you will ever have a job that it matters
>>24905194
It's one of the reasons I hate the ambulance so much. Not only am I a fucking taxi, but I'm also helping you to be an even more depressed little shit because now you can't get a job, now you can't become a functioning member of society.
If your gonna make these comments go fucking admit yourself, don't wait for the burned out cop and EMTs to take you who hate you for wasting their time.
>mfw psychiatrist ask if ill check myself into a ward
>say no and leave quickly
>2 hours later cops at my house take me to the ward
I got a new psychiatrist using the ward social worker
. 18 years old, had 2 psychotic episodes total since I was 17 and been in the psych 3 times. 2 because of psychosis. 1 because of depression post psychosis. First because of MDMA. Second because I smoked haze. Never touching drugs again, felt very suspicious of everyone and thought people were after me. Lost most of my friends (But they all used drugs so good riddance)
Managed to rebuild, got a job now and 3 friends who have been through psychosis as well.Next year I might go back to school. We'll see, no rush.
>>24905078
>Giving medical information on a background check
Holy shit America. Land of the free?
Over here no one is allowed to your medical background without your permission. Also saying that people with mental problems will never have a job that matter is bullshit. Some won't, some get over it and will.
>>24899838
this is bait
>oreganol comment
>>24894606
What jobs do you usually have?
>>24905237
>emt friend who works midnights in a town over
>like half her fucking runs at night at suicidal teenagers
>one night she's pissed cause she had school all day and didn't get a chance to sleep before work
>have to take a psych patient 2 hours to some special place at like 2 am
>it was some 15 year old drama queen she said
>oh for fucks sake
>the girl kept trying to go to sleep on the ride there
>she kept waking her up just to piss her off
Most of us emts just don't give a fuck anymore. Jesus fuck another time we had to take some fat fuck who couldn't get out of bed from her dirty piss smelling house to take her to a nursing home cause she threatened to cut her wrists with her glasses
I still remember trying to move her and falling on her piss soaked bed
>>24905405
He's saying it just says you'll have a record of a run in with the law. Not what it's for it'll just be there.
>>24895548
Youre fucked, thats how it starts, soon you'll be looking at pictures of slightly mismatched floor tiles and stuff and a week later you'll be shooting up heroin
>>24905833
I know that feel
I started with tiles then seeing gravel out of alignment makes me have to shoot up
I worked with teenagers on a psych ward once as an orderly. Most of the kids admitted were special snowflakes who wouldn't eat or were cutters, as long as you sat down with em and got to know them there was no trouble.
Most of it came down to shitty parenting but three things stood out.
>this one 14 year old girl who was in love with her 20-some year old boyfriend who literally had t-Rex arms and couldn't wipe his own ass, she though his deformitie was cute and was concerned about him going to jail for statuary rape
>this one kid who was locked in a room and tortured by his lesbian parents for some time, I'm not sure if this claim is entirely true because the kid has enough social confidence to befriend the girls and boys and acts like an alpha. His only problem is his outburst of violence when he gets mad and had to be restrained a couple times because he thought people were stabbing him. I'm not a psychologist so I'm probably wrong but I think someone who was locked in a room and literally tortured with knives and guns should be afraid of the world.
>this one could who had an attachment disorder. The kid lazily tried to bite me when I woke him up and spent the entire day crying about another staff member being there, I had to sit with him the entire day in the isolation while he cried about missing the staff member.
>mfw one of the kids who just seemed like a normal slow kid is actually an idiot savant and has mad balance and juggling skills that transcend circus clowns
>>24905405
It doesn't matter if you recover enough to be capable of working. If it shows up on a background check that you ever had a mental problem or police encounter, you will NEVER be hired for anything other than grunt work.
>>24906609
how did you get that job?
I've been to the loony bin three times in succession. Been years since I last went, it scared me so badly I've sworn to never go back again. I was in a manic episode- I have bipolar disorder- and had been attacking people for sexual gratification. I wasn't able to control my actions since I was psychotic, so one of the incidents got reported and is now permanently in my background history. I've been working minimum wage jobs for ages trying to save up for school but it's so fucking hard to make good decisions and hold down a job when you're constantly fighting yourself.
There's a monster in my head and it's having all the fun.
>>24906715
By being 6'7 and a handsome muscular guy.
You only needed a high school diploma as a minimum but a degree for you more pay. The hospital hired all sorts of dumb shits, I think I was the only worker who didn't need to take a smoke break every 2 hours. Hell, we even had a worker who fell in love with a baby rapist on the criminally insane ward and had to be fired
>>24906898
im 6'3 and muscular
where do I find these jobs working in a loonybin would be fun
>>24906920
Just find any psych hospital, if you like working 12 hour shifts 3 times a week and chilling out with crazies, this is the career for you.
The best part is hearing all the stories about their lives imo
>>24907142
hanging out with the crazies is something I enjoyed when I stayed in the hospital
where do they post that they are hiring?
>>24907196
When I got hired, I went to a job fair and thats when I got interviewed
they also have a website.
when I got hired to work as a guard in juvenile hall I applied through their website
>>24906761
dont take the pills
>>24907944
do take the pills they are good for you
>>24908514
good goy take the pills
how do you get help without being placed in a loony bin?
i have several mental issues. im really good at pretending like i don't have anything to everyone but my family. my family knows that im not right in the head but they don't really care.
>>24908987
go see a psychiatrist and tell them your problems
>>24905237
>be me in college
>go to psych for reasons
>they ask me if I'm getting admitted
>no
>continue session
>cops bust in and take me
>can't get a job now
Go fuck yourself you asshole, apparently seeking any help is a bad idea
>I'm special
We're all mentally ill. Psych grad here
>>24909026
but if i tell them the truth
i don't want this to happen >>24909188
or >>24905312
>>24909236
it will be for the best
Are the psych wards really that bad in the US?
I know a dude who went in one and said it was like a horror film.
>>24908935
>>24908514
>>24907944
m8 I've taken my pills for the last year and it's the only thing that's ever helped. if that makes me a good goy so be it
>>24905078
>I'll just encourage you to kill yourself anyway in the back of the ambulance.
You a a terrible person and a terrible EMT. Way to make the rest of us look bad, asshole.
Let me guess, you work for some shitty private ambulance service in some bumble fuck nowhere area that uses private ambulance companies for 911 calls.
Do you even have NREMT?
>>24909397
Fuck off you sound like a volunteerfag
I spent a week in the psych ward after my first suicide attempt. I was in the emergency room waiting for transfer for about 4 hours before a Lifecare ambulance arrived to shuttle me to the institution down the road.
As for the institution itself, it was pretty cozy. The walls were covered with nature pictures and the rooms had a nice relaxing color scheme to them. The food was good and there was plenty of ginger ale for the recovering alcoholics. Personally I was in the "quiet room" (a crisis center) for most of the first night because I was still actively suicidal, but I settled down once I accepted the jew drugs.
The drugs really did help. I felt a lot better and spent the rest of my stay playing chess with other people. I'm still on pretty heavy meds, they help a lot.
>>24909602
what meds are you taking anon? I'm pretty heavily medicated myself but it's amazing how much they help.
>>24909522
Why should it matter if I am a volunteer or not. In my area career and volunteer work together and have the same level of training. In fact my station is actually a combination career and volunteer and so are most of the stations in my area.
You don't seem to be very professional. If you don't enjoy working in the Emergency medical field, then don't. Go find something that you do enjoy doing instead. The third option is that you could just stop being a little cunt, but somehow I don't think that one is possible for you to achieve.
>>24909780
I'm on 20mg of Lexapro, 10mg of Olanzapine, and 15mg of Buspirone with Clonozapam on the side as-needed.
>>24909804
Volunteer kuck for schlomo
>>24909822
Neat, I've never been on any of those before. do you get any bad side effects?
>>24909804
please ignore the troll, it's sufficient that you posted something that shows that not all EMTs are assholes
>Tfw my severe depression and borderline alcoholism got me my first gf
mentally ill are the true masterrace
>>24909804
>volunteer
>same level of training as career
HAHAHAHA HAHAHAHA ok man whatever makes you hard at night
Talk to me in a few years when you're not in ems anymore
>>24909860
Nope, no real side effects beyond drowsiness at higher dosages. I'm a lot more stable than I used to be. Clonozapam does a lot when I really need it. I can pretty much handle anything now besides things that separate me from my meds.
>>24893839
spent ~1 month in rich people mental hospital when i was 18
Been to the bin once.
Now, i'm a normie ;)
>>24909899
I respect him more than you
took my meds time to sleep for 12 hours
please keep the thread alive
>>24899838
just die already
blahblah
Not really the same thing but I'm autistic. I was an IEP student and at some point during middle school I kind of fell apart. I stopped speaking and eating and spent most of the day chewing on my fingers and yeah I guess I went to a hospital.
>>24910418
>that feel when also had iep for autism
>put in a classroom never taught anything just forced to busy work
>>24910418
>>24910491
Same here guys.
I was hell bent on becoming a neet because I'm not willing to do mundane labor as would be inevitable, and they were trying to get me hired at stores and other dumb places.
>>24910491
I went to a very small school at the time so there were like 3 other special ed students. I was the only one who could read so they had me spend most of the day reading out loud and my teacher would make a mark every time I paused to breathe or forgot to pause for a comma. I think they thought reading was the only thing I was able to do, so they decided to roll with it.
all these autism feels
>>24910542
I actually like my job. Once I got out of school I was alright. They told me I was so impaired for so long and I believed them but I'm on my own now and I'm doing just fine.
>>24910759
you just say that
Hello. I am the smartest man on Earth. I have been steadily ranked in the highest deviations. No one is on par, with what I can dish out. In the chaos I mutter my words, and there is no one to hear them.
I am a next generation man, and yet I am already off the wave. I watch the sea of men, crashing themselves in their endless turmoils. I am a spectator, for this fight of gladiators. I write louse rhymes, as I have little to say.
Do you know what it means, to be human? Isn't that an exciting question? When you look at the games, at the news, it is like looking at the ceiling of the cave. Outside, this is: We are. There is... Outside, the sun is shining so bright, we cannot comprehend. There is. I am.
Is there anything else to say? It is divine... I am. Probably, that is the shine of the sun... All the rest, it is only the filling colours. All the rest, it is a deviation, to protect our eyes from the glare. We are not ready for that glare, outside the womb.
So we are here, a womb in the womb, in the coldest warmth there is to read. United in our depths, and in our sickest motions. United in our failings, it is the most divine conjonction.
But yes, sometimes it is so dark, I wonder if the place is not hell. I am afraid that everything is a dark failure, tumbling through eternity. A divine abortion. Can you imagine? Maybe it is better you can't. So maybe, this is why we don't.
For a long time, I didn't care about Africa, and I thought nobody gave a shit about Africa, but really, their conditions are improving. It is taken care of. And so I believe it's not that people don't care, but that it is easier to be evil, than to withstand the pain of the world, and of our duties.
I believe also, good has a taste of boring. I believe many things, and I believe nobody gives a shit. I have little to say. Well, I'm leaving. I'm too shy to read, I'm sorry. People crash their words on me, like the legions of hell. I am supposedly neurotic. Well. Good evening
>>24909390
It's not that bad, just really boring. It's kinda cozy having no responsibilities, being made three meals a day, and being able to sleep whenever.
