Why aren't you dead yet?
Something something about my cells still doing stuff to sustain my organs.
Or something something about my brain still not producing stuff enough to hate its guts.
Have to wait for my parents to die first, even then I'll likely be too much of a coward to do it and just live out the rest of my life miserable and alone
>>24724800
If I were dead, how could I enjoy fapping?
Because videogames.
Also younger siblings who look up to me for some reason.
>>24724800
Good question. I should be.
every night i pray i dont wake up
I keep drinking water when I'm thirsty on accident
it's less effort to just keep living tbf lads
>>24724800
There are "radical" muslims to kill and and take my pent up aggression and misery out on.
>>24724800
My gf would be sad. Also, life is fun.
because i'm addicted to memes
Mommy won't let me, hope I die pretty soon to a drunk driver, a bomb, or drug use
>>24725186
>has gf
>still browses /r9k/
nice meme
>>24727726
Silly Anon, no one got any dubs!
(Except OP)
>>24727755
>says no one got dubs
>gets double dubs
>>24724800
>tfw if I wanted to die I'd have to slice my own throat or aim for the jugular
Kinda scary and it'd hurt like hell
I'm still looking to buy barbiturate from a reliable source
>>24724800
Joined the military so I'll probably end up getting killed.
>>24728067
let me know if you find that reliable source, pham.
i'd love to go out on a high of opiates and barbs.
>>24724800
Because there's already enough pain in this world. Someone has to alleviate it.
Because I'm quite comfortable. Killing myself seems like an unnecessary amount of effort when I'm already comfortable
>>24728098
shit's pretty hard to come by, you know
because there's an unlimited stream of porn, video games and things to watch
>>24728172
I'm in no rush. I'm going to die whether I get my hands on it or not.
I just want a painless or relatively mess-free way of going.
guess im just lucky
>>24724800
I should probably kill myself but idk maybe something decent will happen in my life
Feelium is in the mail! No worries OP!
because watching sports is fun.
>always next year
>reason why i continue
>>24728547
They said those things are diluted with oxygen now, so you'll basically just be meme'ing yourself to sleep for a bit.
I continue to live out of spite.
Life has a sense of humor.
>>24728658
Life has nothing but contempt for everything that lives. That's why we all die.
>>24728622
No worries familia, I got it sent in liquid form with a >99% purity. coupled with a decompression chamber and a heating device large pot + hotplate at low, I got this.
>>24728814
Can you order liquid helium online??
I'm asking for a friend.
>>24724800
Waiting for my parents to die first.
because im going to wake up to see >>24724800
>>24728971
Keep telling yourself that, kid.
The only place you'll see her is in your memes.
No one's managed to cut my head off yet.
>>24728862
Yeah, it's super easy, liquid feelium and even compressed feelium is used across industry for refrigerant and welding purposes. Got me some on a site for that. Like I said, high purity is assured because the industry requires it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZMZ3E6rWNd4
because life is getting stranger every day
>>24724800
I'm a selfish nigger that just wants to watch anime and play games
>>24729080
Kill urself senpai
>>24724800
im living in a strange paradox where on the one hand i wish i was dead because i hate myself and on the other hand i'm terrified of death and want to live forever
>>24730323
Don't get yourself meme'd, kiddo
I need to outlive my sister.
I'll piss on that whore's grave when she dies.
If I try to kill myself, Jesus will be very cross with me and send me to hell forever because He loves me so much.
If I don't kill myself, I risk being part of the wrong Church, and Jesus will be very cross with me when I die, and send me to hell forever because He loves me so much.
Stop the Universe. I want to get off.
I want to get off Mr. Yahweh's Wild Ride.
Hey! It's the cutie chick from the at&t commercials! I'd luv go bone her so good...
The laws of physics have not yet caused my death.
because tomorrow
still waiting for that accident though
Didn't I?
>>24728377
Share your luck with us.
>anon tells me to kill myself
>I don't
>who here /devilish/
> want to kill myself but I have a beautiful 10 month old puppy
Its bittersweet.
I have a duty to carry out a mission before i die
>>24724800
>Why aren't you dead yet?
Modern medicine is keeping me alive.
For same reason I'm not anything, I get nothing done.
>>24734969
>tfw stuck in a nightmare
>tfw can't wake up
>>24724800
wish she did more stuff with the LivePrudeGirls channel, it's been like 2 years, fuck she's so god damn cute.
to your question, I don't know, there's no real excuse, useless in every way, guess I'm just a pussy.
>>24728087
Story behind the pic? I forgot it.
>>24735075
They were both top tier waifu material. I wavered between Milana and Stevie.
>>24734969
>in a coma and your imagination has created the entire universe around you
>spend most of your life arguing with strangers on an anonymous anime imageboard
>>24734993
fuck deodorant
If normies think I smell bad then maybe they should fuck off away from me
I tried last night by buyinga bunch of dusters and using them all at once hoping it would disrupt the electrical circuits in my heart and cause it to stop and result an instant death. The result is that im puking my guts right now.
Cause of underrated posts like >>24732263
>>24735208
>dusters
Why the fuck would anyone use dusters? There are better stuff to get high on.
>>24735134
will we ever get another pair of qts who are genuinely funny?
the "qts" people watch on youtube these days don't even compare, it's disgusting.doesn't help that all you see now is liberated women with dyed hair.
I know that if I kill myself then it will force my family to have a funeral and feign sympathy. I have to wait for my parents to die first, then I can kill myself.
>>24735208
You dont wanna die.
>>24724800
Because dead people can't fap.
I want to see an opera performed live.
>>24735185
Fuck deodorant, it does nothing to stop sweating, I don't know where that idea even came from, and the unscented is always heavily scented.
My tip is potassium alum. No smell whatsoever, but it has to be reapplied about every 36 to 48 hours. No need for shower though. A cotton ball andand 70% alcohol us all you need to spruce up.
afraid of the blade
>>24724800
Because I had some Magnesium+Kalium fizzy tablets left. if i didn't take one yesterday immediatly after coming home I would most likely have died from heart failure. shit saved my life.
To the people writing that they await their parents to die before offing their selves.
Do you realize you are here because of your parents? That their selfishness is the cause of you suffering?
Can't you discern cold, hard reality from your feelings?
>>24724800
But we are already dead anon, since the moment we were born.
>>24735107
Spanish civil war. A priest carrying a "rojo" who's just been shot.
>>24735107
A small, insignificant coup in Venezuela.
One of many, forgotten except for this photo, of a dying man asking for his last rites. The street they were on was full of gunfire, but the shooting stopped for the priest, and resumed after the man had bleed out.
A hundred lifetimes, gone and replaced, its only mark on the greater world is a black & white photo and a Wikipedia entry.
>>24735984
I don't want to see them be hurt for their selfishness because many times they protected me from my selfishness.
>>24735328
>will we ever get another pair of qts who are genuinely funny?
Probably not, man... This is all post Amy "Two In The Pooner" Schumer. Radical feminism is going to destroy what little there is to love about women.
