ITT: worst things you've done to your dick.
> second grade
> playing with magnets
> these are pretty strong magnets, I found a couple like them recently, they're really strong
> put one on either side of my scrotum
> crushing my balls in a vice
> have to pry them off with my fingers
> ninth grade
> masturbating for hours
> decide to use lubricant
> use soap
> next two weeks dead skin flakes off my dick like a snake shedding its skin
> I thought I'd destroyed it for good.
> tenth grade
> hear about std testing where they swab your dick with a q-tip
> stupidly decide to experience it by sticking a q-tip with the cotton ripped off up my urethra
> burned for three days
> no stds because khv.
> have erection for more than 5 hours
> heard about a procedure where the doctor stabs your dick to let the blood drain
> try it with a steak knife
> blood shoots everywhere
> wrap it in gauze and leave it
> goes soft
> agony to get hard for the next few months
> amazed I still have my dick
> Be me
> excema all over body, including penis
> suffer from severe bouts of loneliness
> Masturbation levels peak during such periods
> have to masturbate through shedding dead skin and tearing new skin
> Can't stop
> Terrified that if I get a gf she'll leave me for a normal sick without a skin condition.
> Genuinely stopped me from taking the plunge and trying to get laid
Just DON'T use soap as a lubricant
>>24642931
Just use a condom and do the dick-through-your- fly method to nail her.
>>24642849
>> have erection for more than 5 hours
how did that even come about? pop some viagras?
>>24643128
I realise beggars can't be choosers but if I'm gonna have sex, I'd rather be nude.
Condom I'm cool with for obvious reasons. Probably might have to use them indefinitely.
>>24643191
I got bit by one of those spiders. In retrospect I really should have gone to the hospital.
>>24643224
Wtf what spider gives you a boner for 5 hours
>be me
>shaving pubes
>slice a huge fucking cut at the base if my shaft
>blood wont stop
>go in shower
>no good
>give up and start crying
>masturbate to feel better
>wrap dick in tin foil
Took a long time but it eventually got better
>>24643283
The brazilian wanderer-spiders do that. Their bites can cause an erection that lasts for hours, until the victims dead at some cases.
>>24643283
Brazilian wanderering spider, widows, etc.
>>24643291
>wrap dick in tinfoil
U wot.
Why.
>>24643353
Solid protection.
>>24643291
> dick gushing blood
> masturbate
How'd you pull that off?
>>24643460
Well i just kind of embraced the pain and took out my anger by the friction of the cut.
Looked like a blood bath
>>24641896
Middle school.
I had poison ivy on my dick.
Just some info: i am allergic to poison ivy.
My dick swells up 2.5x size.
>Not bad
Starts to weep thick yellow fluid.
Itches to hell.
Have to whack off with a condom.
Im actually very impressed its fine now, i never told a doctor and the experience left some scarring on the underside.
In Retrospect its pretty funny
