How to kill yourself when you are a scared pussy?
>>24602655
you in a city? if not then hope you have a building tall enough. then ynow ... jump
>>24602655
also dont do it bla bla
I mean, this sounds counterintuitive but jumping in front of a train would be the quickest death I think. Scary as hell to work up the guts though. Its crazy to think its going to happen sometime in my life desu
>>24602655
Cebruz, we know you're just doing this for attention
You know how to kill yourself, just do it and stop calling the paramedics to save your shitskin ass
Why do you want to kill yourself?
Qq1097
>>24603093
2pussy4iti tried 2 overdoses without calling paramedic, one was fun the otherone made me to lie in bed for 3days with hardcore pain
jumping in front of a train seems to be the best way 4 me but once again 2pussy4it
>>24602655
Helium tank
But just for informative purposes.
Don't kill yourself.
>>24603138
Cause all i do is spending in my time in front of my laptop while not really enjoying anything while beingt not motivated to do shit besides shitposting and listening to music
i jumped off a bridge, make sure something is a high enough drop otherwise it's unpleasant
we'll make it one day
>>24604494
pro-tip: don't jump in front of a train at the station, that's where they are slowing down and you have a big possibility to just be bumped by the train and be missed by the wheels
do it on a stretch of track where they are maintaining high speed for maximum ded
no bully intended, just sharing my wisdom
>>24602655
cut into your carotid arteries. It's not that painful and you'll bleed out in a minute.
Do not cut your entire throat, not being able to breath is scary, while bleeding out is like going to sleep.
DO NOT jump off buildings, in front of buses or trains. It ruins everyone's commute and is just a massive hassle and everyone will hate you for it.
>>24604651
>everyone will hate you for it
>implying there are suicide etiquette
Who gives a shit? You'll be dead. Are you retarded? I'm going to die, fuck everyone else, their day can suck a dick
>>24604681
i'm saying it just in caseI knew someone who jumped in front a train at the station, it bumped him away and severed his right leg but he lived
>>24603038
Killing yourself in public is for attention whores.
>>24605179
what did you try to od with?
i tried with xanax and went to sleep with a bag over my head, but someone found me...
i tried again the same thing without the bag, but woke up almost two days later struggling to breath. that sucked.
>>24606031
opiates are the easiest OD
shoot up too much H -> pass out -> choke and die while unconscious, don't experience any pain or suffering
>>24604651
Where's that? And can a pair of scissors do the trick? I don't have anything else on me that's sharp.
dun dun stop suggesting him ways to go out
>>24606031
if you're going to od w/ drugs, i strongly recommend heroin. anything else is stupid.
you gotta look for something that will decrease your heart rate and muscle activity, you pass out, diaphragm doesn't move while you're passed out, you die from lack of oxygen. easy.
my plan b is jumping off a building. probably sometime in the near future.
>>24606155
dude, if i'm going out, i might as well ruin someone else's day...like they kinda ruined my life....
>>24606210
>do a huge shot
>jump off building
best of both worlds honestly
>>24606331
i'll tell you how to do it
:^)
>>24606331
>changing shit
same. but no motivation what so ever. and i have no idea where to find some.
>>24602655
why do people keep making these threads?
B U Y A G U N
>>24606789
look, it's not that easy to buy a gun in europe as it is in diabetus land...
>>24602655
This here is the best option if you are a pussy.
>>24606836
>diabetus land
but anon I don't live in the UK
into each life some rain must faaaallll
>>24606665
I'm going to jerk off to Ashley.
>>24606937
Nice pic, I already have it saved but not at that quality for some reason
I appreciate that
You could just wait to die.
It'll happen eventually.
>>24606940
Me too, it's usually pretty great
Glad you enjoy lolis too, anon
>>24602655
Why don't you just smoke more Weed, senpai?
>>24606865
That gives you time to pussy out.
OP BEST OPTION IS
>Buy shotgun, preferably 12 gauge and buy some slugs, NOT BIRD SHOT OR PELLETS, BUY SLUGS
>Put barrel in mouth angled backwards and up sorta towards the upper back part of your head
>don't hesitate or think about it, just pull the fucking trigger
There you go, fastest, guaranteed painless option. If you don't instantly die you will be unconscious and bleed to death within minutes. No pain. Handguns would work too, just a higher chance of failure. Shotgun is a guarantee. Make sure you don't aim directly upwards because you'll just take out your frontal lobe or fuck up your face, which will keep you alive but you'll be horribly fucked up.
I'm planning to do this sometime within the next year or so, depending on how some things in my life go it could be sooner.
>>24607246
>That gives you time to pussy out
Sure but it's a lot scarier for a pussy to pull the trigger.
>implying OP is American
If he lives in anywhere else he probably can't get a shotgun.
You come to peace with yourself
>>24603155
People that jump in front of trains are fking rude. Train conductors dont ask for that shit
>>24607512
And those that jump dont ask to be born, obviously theyre not trying to hurt the conductor. Its just a way out of hell.
Nobody will ever make me feel bad for wanting an easy, fast suicide
>>24607512
Fuck those pussy conductors, I'd keep a score of how many fags I ran over with my train
car in garage
distract yourself by playing something catchy on the radio
>>24607645
>Obvious solution.
Move to freedomland.
>>24607740
Don't worry. Just three more weeks.
>>24607740
>Holland
Holland sucks its filled with normies. I live there it's depressing
>>24607645
>>24607396
You can get shotguns in many countries pretty easily. Commie shit holes likr Ausfailia and Bongland can be a pain in the ass, but it's doable. Also, if you can't just fucking DO IT then you're a pussy and you don't really want to die
>>24607902
Why don't you go to a public park or some woods to smoke? That's what I used to do when neonazi parents.
All other methods of suicide are inferior.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Suicide_bag
>>24608164
you're such a spoiled brat
>>24607246
I might do this but I only have access to a 9mm which is not ideal but it could do the trick if I'm not a dumbass. I am trying to get my hands on a .357 though.
>>24608164
Go to Los angeles with your aunt. We have great weed in America.
>>24608164
Oh well, looks like you're fucked. Last choice I would give you is suicide by cop. Just commit some crime or phone I'm a threat or something to get police to come after you, preferably a SWAT or Counter Terrorism unit and then pretend to reach for a gun or charge with a knife and they'll drop you.
But you'll come up with some excuse because you're a fucking pussy and you don't actually want to kill yourself.
>>24608356
Just because you were super spoiled doesn't mean you aren't now you entitled brat.
>>24608385
>that video
Is this supposed to be evidence or something to support your statement? I mean, I believe you but I don't fucking understand what that video is saying or what point you're making with it.b
>>24608300
The issue with that is if he's not from burgerland, it's not as likely that they'll bring him down. And then he'll be trapped in a mental instiute.
>>24608356
Fuck amsterdam. Fly to Akron and smoke with me for a few weeks. My house is comfy as fuck.
>>24602655
Same if I'm to be perfectly honest.
>>24608481
Says page does not exist.
>>24608481
>nonon who got his family killed just for the 1.2million pounds
wat
>>24608562
Depends on when you fly man. Plane tickets double at Christmas.
>>24608648
come to us of a so I can murder you
>>24602655
take some nyquil and fall asleep on some railroad tracks
>>24608648
>tfw you will never smoke weed with Cebruz.
Your right it's fucked.
>>24602655
Eat a lot of cholesterol rich foods until you die of a heart attack.
>>24608758
Is he going to give free plane tickets to depressed german potheads?
>>24608790
Too bad there's a 90% chance that Hillary gets the nomination. I'll just vote forwhoever isn't Donald Trump.
>>24608897whoever isn't Donald Trumpwill defiantly win by a landslide. I just hope they free the weed.
>>24609007
Okay lets just pull our money together and run away to Seattle.
>tfwnot 21 so couldn't buy legal weed anyway.
>>24609152
I couldn't understand a word they saidexcept fuck, but for some reason I feel like that song is about smoking weed.
>>24609281
>that one hopsin eye.
Nah your birthday will be great. Your parents will come around, and everything will work out. You just have toREEEEAAAALLLYYY WANT IT.
>>24602655
Keep living.
That's the only solution I've come up with when you're too much of a fucking pussy to even kill yourself.
It's not a great solution but it's the only one I have.
That being said, you don't know what awaits you after death. It's possible that it could be worse but I don't know.
>>24609359
>>24609558
>tfw no more replies.
Cheeze Louise, man. I was just kidding.
>>24609632
I have an idea.
>tell your parents you made a friend online and you guys are gonna go hang out and play vidya at his house.
>have your middleman come to your house and pick you up so your parents think it's legit.
>get weed.
>sneak back to your neetshed.
>get high.
It's foolproof.
>>24609854
Why not? You play games with people online all the time. Your parents will be glad you made a friend. You could even say your spending the night and smoke in your shed till mourning. What could go wrong?>your dad sees someone breaking into the shed.
>thinks its a robber
>shoots you in the face.
>>24606331
>Unironically thinking the only way to use opiates is injection.
Get some pills, crush them up and snort them, shove them up your ass, or just take them with a glass of water. Or alcohol if you want to go out faster. And that's just opiods, you can smoke heroin. I wouldn't recommend that last one though, you'd just pass out before you got enough in your system. Unless of course you took something else like a lot of liquor, or some other CNS depressant. And don't forget to pass out face up so you choke on your own vomit!
Of course I wouldn't recommend itbut too many people try to off themselves, fail, and end up with deformities, permanent brain damage, or get stuck on life support.
you wait. patiently.
eventually you'll be ded
>>24609978
>smoke outside.
Or
>use a sploof and smoke out of a bowl so you can cover the head to keep excess smoke from leaking like joints.
That'll actually help you conserve weed as well and you can get high on less. Pic semi related.
There's lots of ways to cover up the smell. Even if you get in trouble at least you tried it couldn't be worse than lying around in your room thinking about the high that could have been.
>>24610114
>that pic
i think i have like 25% of that left
well lets wait the 3 weeks, i would need to order in 2weeks though so it arrivs at the right time
>>24610142
I feel your pain, brosef. I've gotten high on much less too. Pic completely related. Was the last thing I smoked.
>>24610177
>tfw get jelly at my old pics
>>24610377
>>24610177
>both 77
>>24610377
Gram bags? Is that how they come in the mail or your middle man.
I do the same thing. Pic related is <2 grams. Was 20 bucks worthgot it for free thoughfor the whole stem full but smoked some before the picture becuase I'm a fiend. Come from a grower so I always get them still on the stem.
>>24610391
>Repeating repeating digits.
Nice.
>>24610472
gram bags are from amsterdam, you are only allowed to buy 5gr max at each shop daily
>>24610568
That's stupid. I'm pretty sure you can buy it by the ounce in legal states.
Also you took your figurines to Amsterdam with you?
>tfw talking about weed just makes the urge to smoke 10x worse.
These 3 weeks are going to kill me.
>>24610662no i got that weed with me to germany
im a gangsta you know
>>2461067
>go to Amsterdam
>buy weed
>take it back to Germany
>sell weed
>buy more weed with weed money.
My god its brilliant, how has no one ever thought of this before?
>>24610692
>Implying
alot people do it and alot people get busted, they normaly dont check out familys so i hoped that they dont check us out
otherwise could get in problems
expensive/good weed gets normaly called "amsterdam weed"
>>24610730
I was kidding man. That sounds like how BC bud used to be. Then everyone said "this is thst medical shit."
>tfw have smoked actual medical weed in a non medical state.
It's actually pretty good. Not sure that it's alot better than shit grown here.
>go live with aunt in Los angeles
>get medical weed for depression/anxiety
>????
>profit
>>24610827
i wish it was that easy
>nearly 11am
what im doing ;_;
>>24610842
Why aren't you in school, young man?
>tfw 5am, been awake all night.TILL THE BREAK OF DAWN YO!!![\spoiler]
>>24610842
Pls be my bf
I love you bby
It is late, an0n
Go to sleep
>>24610878
well let me have my breakfast
>>24610930
you first
>>24610883
first send me weed
>>24610930Douchnozzle
>>24610941
Cebruz mourning routine:
>spend 7 hours eating a bowl of cereal becuase 2busyshitposting
>miss school completely.
>welp time to shitpost.
>>24610987
Im a illegal neet since september
but that mourning routine used to be standard like one year ago
>>24610941
I cant
1 hour of sleep should be enoughbtw dont mind that text from prev pic, forgot to remov
>>24610987
Same to you too shit nozzle
>>24611034
brb going in bed while having a comfy chat with you
>>24611004
>smuggle weed
>doing drugs
>skipping school
>gangsta level 9001
>tfw cebruz you will never ride dirty with Cebruz
>>24611034I know what you are but what am I[\spoiler]
>>24611066
>comfy chatim going to v0mit soon, an0nn
>>24611072
Im the shit, bitch
And i dont really care who are you
>>24611066
>tfw my online bf is cheating on me with another tomoko poster
>>24611072
>tfw cant make money with drugs for fastmoney
>>24611101
your own fault, it will be comfy for us!!!
>>24611122
I told you that you arent my bf
>>24611122
pic related
>>24611134
Mmm, ookayim feeling pretty comfy desu
>>24611101
who u callin a loser mf' im packing heat got no seat 2 beat. bich niiga didnt no i was raised on the street. darktown niga reppin i got i pul a ryme so quick got da shik shit niga my raps got layers 4 da highest players
>>24611134
>move to Louisiana where mimosa hostilis is legal to grow for aesthetic purposes.
>make DMT lab
>achieve new level of consciousness
>become hiesenberg of DMT.
Helium exit bag. It's simple to construct, painless, and mininally traumatising for others. Make sure you buy undiluted helium though - some providers dilute it with oxygen.
>>24611198
dmt is way too easy to make, i can even make it here
>>24611198
So what are you senpai
>>24611213
This thread is not about killing self long time ago, go away
>>24611258
Then why don't you?
>tfw life long dreams ruined
>no longer any reason to live
>tfw live in bugerland so I'll just go buy a gun.
>>24611267
I'm hardcore. 318 Rachet City nigga reppin. I'll pop a nigga for talking shit IDGAF!
>>24611148
>begs for bf
>gets bf
>refuses bf
really senpai
>>24611339
Hard shit senpai
>>24611921
My bf now!
>>24612401
Can I be your bf too?
>>24602655
Jump in front of a train. Only need to not be a pussy for a couple seconds. Won't hurt at all either.
Or you could charge a cop with a kitchen knife yelling "HERE PIGGY PIGGY PIGGY!".
>>24612480
No, you cannot be my bf
>>24612401
Bitch I know it. Now be nice to Cebruz. Stop stealing his shit, its not nice. Don't make me cut you mang.
>>24612500
I vote for the latter.
stream/post suicide please bby
>>24612564
Ima make him hurt
Ima ima make him hurt
And about what stuff are you talking about?
What am i stealing?
>>24612619
You fagged him out of steamid Tomoko.
>>24607540
These fucking scums make everyone late. It happens quite regularly where I live and the train delays drive everyone crazy.
You want to take your own life? Fine, but do it without bothering others.
>>24612672
Nuh uh, im not that person, mayne
>>24612674
This could be solved with a voluntary euthenasia program. I believe firmly in the universal right to die. I just don't understand why people can stop you from taking your own life.
>>24612708
I'm pretty sure you are. In any case, you seem like a very mean person, who hurt you? Neglectful babysitter? Abusive step parent? Did a school teacher try to stick it in your butt?
tie sufficient helium-filled balloons to gun
go to open area
shoot yourself
gun flies away
no one will know
>>24612751
>I just don't understand why people can stop you from taking your own life.
It's because those who do it are highly depressed, and depression can be cured. Nobody can stop you from an hero if you really want to, but it's totally normal to try to prevent you from doing something you will never recover from. There are tons of people who tried to take their own life and are now glad that they were helped by others.
>>24612751
Im not him though
20 year old male here, i have heart failure and will most likely be dead soon, before that i will take an exit bag, what should i do before that? Travel? go to parties? or just sit in my room and get drunk alone until it arrives?
>>24612762
Kek. This would be a great cop drama episode. They should have done this on Psych. I miss Psych.
>>24612839
Maybe. But I feel like if a person truly wants to kill him self. Has went through therapy. Is not having a depressive episode and of sound mind wants to commit suicide. He should be allowed to.
>>24612856
YOU, SIR, ARE A LIAR AND A THEIF!
>>24612858
alcor
freeze yourself
>>24612943
Do not call me no thief nor liar senpai, im not him
>>24612858
Try heroin. It's not like you've got anything to loose.
>>24613089
BULLSHIT. JUST FUCKING ADMIT IT I KNOW YOU ARE. FUCKING ADMIT IT YOU FUCKING COWARD!
>>24613139
Whatever
Im too tired for this
>>24613271
>he still hasn't removed the subtite.
>>24613337
But some people are not irrelevant, so its fine
>>24607512
Not to mention you get dragged alive for like 7 minutes or something on average. Fuck that shit.
>>24607396
You can get shotguns nearly anywhere dumbshit. It's handguns and fully auto shit that's hard to get outside of America.
Wake up
Zzzzz
