Living a Lie
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You are currently reading a thread in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001
You are currently reading a thread in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001
>tfw I'm so tired of putting on a mask in public
>tfw people start seeing cracks in the facade
Who else /livinalie/ here?
>pic related
same Op. out of curiosity, what is your lie?
>>24510183
Everybody thinks I'm the kind generous funnyman. I'm everybody's "friend" and the guy they come to when they need help or advice. They look at me and see a great person when I'm really a mess in truth.
If I help everyone, who's there to help me?
Mhh, I sometimes lie when I talk to a new person so I seem more interesting, even though I don't really do that anymore.
I "lie" to my mom that I am going to get a job. I should just tell her I am never going to and that I am not able and retarded so she stops nagging me.
>>24510225
Are you me? That's exactly my situation.
>tfw I'm the only thing keeping multiple people from killing themselves or spiraling back into depression
>tfw I wanna die just as much as they do but I gotta keep smiling
>tfw you make jokes at work that you're actually serious about.
If I work at Tesco for 10 years straight. I probably will look into killing myself or quit and keep on walking indefinitely until I end up dead in some ditch somewhere with my kidneys removed.
Three years left. It's all going by so quickly.
>>24510335
The funny part is that it was the exact opposite in elementary. I was that weird kid that said whatever came to his mind and was funny once in a blue moon. I got bullied bad. I even got thrown into a dumpster (thankfully empty) by 10 or so of my fellow classmates.
After elementary school I swore that'd never happen to me again. I mechanically learned how to interact by watching others and I heavily analyzed my own behavior, cutting out and introducing some things until I became what I was in high school.
I lied and faked my ass off in high school. Even then, when people were thinking I was doing things like going to parties on the weekend or smoking weed or getting laid I was home, jerking off and browsing 4chan.
>>24510383
>Ted Nasmith
There has never been an artist who paints such stunning landscapes and such horrible bodies.
>>24510225
Same here. It's like i am the only one to go for an advice or a deep talk. Sometimes i just want to move to a new place without a word to anyone and see how they handle it.
>>24510163
>people start seeing cracks in the facade
I know this feel too well
>>24510624
>"Dude, you look so...tired"
>"Anon, why do you seem so sad?"
>>24510163
What would happen to you if your mask is pulled off?
>mfw highschool taught me the facade is literally not worth it
>mfw live as the lazy unlikable cunt because anything else disgusts me
>>24510163
>>24510225
Same here.
I'm the slightly conservative accepting individual
>also lied about not being a faggot though.
>>24510799
It would be extremely painfuI
>>24510799
It would be pretty painful.
>>24510859
>>24510861
You're a tired guy
>>24510879
4 U.Thus comment was too low in content
>>24510163
What do you mean by a mask? Every single person has aspects of themselves they conceal. If everybody thinks you're that person, it's because you've been that person, pretending or not. You can be a great person and mess, they aren't mutually exclusive. You aren't defined by your bad traits, they're not your true colours and you aren't wearing mask when you're the person you described. You're just another person riddled with contradictions and complexities.
>>24510624
>>24510717
>tfw I've started noticing that I've been getting a 1000 yard stare much more frequently than normal.
>tfw people look at me concerned and I look like I've seen some serious shit when in reality I'm wondering what the fuck I'm doing with my life.
>>24510225
At least people come to you for help
>tfw none ever speaks to you unless it's work related or they absolutely have to
>tfw no one wants to hear anything from you
I literally have no human value at all
Everyone thinks I passed my first year of uni and now in my second year. Truth is, I failed miserably and am now living in a shitty house with cheap rent, and I'm running out of money. Plus I'm in huge amounts of debt
>>24510163
I work in retail so I live a lie every day. I have to pretend I'm happy when I'm not.
>>24510996
This. Nothing to add, you summed it up very well.
>>24510879
>>24510717
>>24510624
Didn't know there were so many tired guys here.
I let the mask slip too much and went from the Smart chill black guy with a witty response for everything and no romantic interest, to outing myself as a supporter of world extermination in faux jest.
They knew I wasn't joking, I can feel it. I can fucking feel it. I should have never shown my power level during that break from my ethics class.
I haven't been to any courses in 2 weeks and the dean has been sending me emails. Missed calls from friendly classmates.
It's over.
I was doing so well.
>>24511962
my sides are in orbit
just mentioning your black made that funnier
>>24512031
Should have told me before you kek'd I would have hitched a fucking ride. Christ knows i'm done on this fucking planet anyways.
>single for 3 years
>still tell mom stories of me and ex together on the phone
>I'm so lonely
>>24512057
in fairness it was just one slip up, pretend it never happened, normies suppress stuff they dont understand and if you integrated yourself as well as it sounds they probably couldnt handle the combo and chose to forget what you said
>>24510163
>>24510225
Pretty sure I've read this shit word for word on tumblr a million times tbqhwy family
Don't worry though, you're a special snowflake who is really, really important! :)
>>24511065
you're probably a boring miserable waste of time
>>24512241
No it's a sign. It isn't the first either. I haven't taken off my clothes or showered since then.
I tried going back but I stayed one class and went home, well. I rode the train station to station for the duration it would have taken me to go to my second class and go home.
I'll give you some advice, when you lose your mind, you lose it fast. And you'll know. You'll definitely know.
Blink and you'll miss it. Every decision you'll make from the point on will be ran through a filter that begs a question.
>Does this matter?
>Will it matter when i'm dead?
And if the answer is no? Well. Here's the thing. It'll start being no a lot more often, more and more actually until your mind has finished formatting the undesirables and inconveniences in your lifestyle.
Mischief threads are nothing. I was already doing a little poor in one class, the professor told me not to withdraw from it
>These classes are $1500 you don't want to take it again
Sure pal. I won't, joke's on him i'll be fucking dead.
Psh, normies. Honestly.
>>24511065
that's funee
I've come out about everything to everyone but no one takes me seriously
>>24510225
What a unique human being you are!
>>24512298
>>24513010
Fuck these guys
>>24510225
Tell the other guys to fuck off too
No ones here to help you, you fucking idiot. It's all about yourself, all for one, don't bother with other people
