This happened 'bout an hour ago
>be me
>fat cunt, at movie theaters
>watching James Bond, gotta piss
>walk to bathroom, /fit/ af guy with his 4 year old daughter about to walk into a stall
>okay then
>pull down pants, start to piss
>suddenly I hear the girl say, "Daddy, what is that thing hanging there?"
>guy replies, "It's like a soft baseball bat honey."
>girl exclaims, "I wanna touch it!"
>few seconds go by, then she yells "Its getting bigger dady, look at the bat its getting bigger!"
>guy shushes her, whispers to her that she can see the 'bat' later
>I walk out, wash hands and gtfo
What in god's name was that, anons?
>>24457406
I'm confused you pulled down your pants or /fit/ guy pulled down his pants?
Childhood molestation.
>>24457473
This OP
roboblock
>>24457457
I pulled my pants down to piss
>>24457473
It was really weird, because the dude resembled Bradley Cooper
Dude call the police
something that was none of your business
kids at that age are naturally curious about that shit, my 5 year old touches my dick whenever she gets a chance to, there's nothing sexual about it
>>24457645
Kill yourself molester slime fuck
>>24457561
I should have, truly.
>>24457645
>>24457406
>growing baseball bat
wut?
>>24457764
his way of explaining it to her? i guess?
>>24457689
I can tell you don't have kids
it's impossible to sexualize your own offspring, he probably told her she could "see it later" to get her to shut the fuck up in a public place
>>24457406
>not blackmailing him into sharing his daughter
You missed out desu
>Single dad with daughter, share a bed
>She sometimes wakes me up by laying on me or sitting on me and bouncing up and down and saying "daddy" over and over
>Despite morning wood
Been trying to get her to stop but it's not even the worst thing.
>>24457864
>Been trying to get her to stop
Why?
>>24457406
> What Did I Just Witness?
just some father daughter bonding
>>24458076
Hmmmmmm
I didn't know this was a hmmmm thread
>>24457836
I was beginning to feel like I was the only person in this thread who entertained this as a possibility. Sure there could've been bad undertones, or he could've just been taking a piss and the dad freaked out and just tried to end the situation as quickly as possible.
>>24457917
Because she's getting a little old for that kind of closeness and it not to seem wrong.
And of course that it's my daughter sitting and even bouncing on my hard dick. Even if she wasn't mine, I'm not a pedo.
>>24457406
You should have stalked them into their house at least thats why I would do cause my life is boring and i have nothing better to do
>>24458211
>robot stalks them home
>they notice
>dad calls the cops
>robot ends up on the sex offender registry and chaddad continues to enjoy his loli in private
Why did you not go into a stall?
I never use a urinal, i dont want to get my dick out infront of a bunch of dudes so we can splash piss on eachother.
>>24458390
what the fuck kinda urinals do you even go to?
>>24458468
the ones in Britlamistan
>>24458468
You don't have piss fights at the urinal? Normies
>>24458468
I just hate using them and public toilets in general i prefer it to be silent when i urinate. Got a weird story actually
> Be me
> go to toilets in college
> go to the same cubicle i always do
> get me willy out
> about to have nice quiet pee time, can feel pee about to come out
> hear the door open
> group of chads walk in, talking loudly
> pee retracts back up my penis
> Hear them peeing and talking at the same time
> fucking savages
> have to wait for them to leave before i can pee
Wtf is wrong with people?
>>24457864
Not even the worse thing?
I won an inflateable bat at tivoli when I was a kid :3
>>24459219
Because of apartment limitations, we take baths together. Occasionally she ends up touching my bare dick, like with her foot. Again though, been trying to put a stop to it.
I got a chubby reading this thread.
>>24457406
>wash hands
>>24459645
Chubby means erection
>>24458840
i always take a ninja piss anyways. i pee into the side of the bowl, not the water
>>24459737
As not to make noise?
Thats pretty clever.
>>24457406
Did you touch it?
