Anyone here still trying online dating?
Share your stories
>went on probably 6 dates total
>final one had a short term gf (2 months)
>got too busy and didn't feel like putting in the effort anymore with her
>broke up and deleted accounts
I'm considering remaking them
javascript:quote('24369411')
>make tinder
>ask r9k for help
>they mock me
>delete tinder
>eharmony for 11 months
>have only matched with 3 girls, none of which want to meet up in real life
>finally match with a girl who lives 3 hours away by drive
>we talk on the phone for a few days (few hours every day) decide we wanna meet, do it
>meet in person for 4 hours talking at a coffee shop. Kiss her at the end
>She says that she has never been kissed on the first date
>so tired, drive home
>talk to her a bit less, maybe every other day or every few days because she said she doesn't want a relationship to happen too fast
>meet up again in 2 weeks since first date
>we go out for dinner and a movie
>I am nervous the whole time, kiss at end again
>talk a bit, she says that we don't have the chemistry even though i am the perfect guy otherwise
>I had fallen so hard for this girl it took me months to get over her
I have a couple more stories if you want. This was just the first time online dating actually = a real meetup
had two different experiences. one bad one good. on okc.
bad one
girl made herself out to be very mature and clever online. we had a high matchrate.
but in person, she was very clumsy and immature. she slammed her arms down on the table or made her hand gestures jerky and over the top. her voice was also especially grating, she had kind of a northern ohio accent (she wasn't from there).
she spoke in a very unsophisticated way in person as opposed to online, really crude. finally, at the bar when I ordered a beer she asked for a soda, like from the bar gun.
there was nothing wrong with her attitude or personality necessarily, but her mannerisms were really antisocial and it made me uncomfortable. she didn't want to talk about any of the things we had in common online. it was really weird. oh and she never smiled
this girl sent me a long, self-congratulatory message about how she's volunteering to talk to prisoners who need outside assistance
i wrote back "i substitute teach sometimes. sounds similar. anyway. could i maybe call you some time?"
she hasn't written back yet
>mfw she will
>mfw i finally discovered full idgaf chad mode in my 20s
>>24369945
sounds like you completely ignored her message and just posted what you wanted to post while loosely positing that the subjects are related without any reason why
>>24369645
what went wrong i dont get it ?
>>24369699
i've found that "chemistry" is not mystical
it's basically:
smiling a lot
staring into eyes but not for too too long
letting your libido take control once you've established it's time to make out, without too much reservation. reservation good at first, bad after crossing the threshold
>start online dating profile on OKC
>browse profiles
>send messages
>go to sleep
>wake up the next day
>nothing
>get angry and delete profile
>never look back
Not cut out for online dating. Never again, no patience whatsoever. Legitimately I'd rather die single than put myself through that shit again.
Met all of these girls on MySpace back in the day so I don't know if that counts:
>Girlfriend 1
She asked me out since we lived close to each other and were the only scene kids around. She dumped me because I was too boring.
>Girlfriend 2
Was a friend of my first girlfriend and had a sleepover at my house. I cockblocked myself SO bad by saying that I don't think we should have sex when she asked if I wanted to fuck. She dumped me the next day.
>Current girlfriend
Was from another state. Gave up job to meet up with her in her home state. She was cool at first but then over the years, she showed her true colors. Five years later, I am fucking miserable.
I should've stayed single.
I went on more than 50 dates thanks to Normiebook when it didn't have any messages/friendreq bans, around 2012 it was basically useless and stopped online dating.
potential #1
>send him a message
>talk for a few days
>asks for nudes
>bye
gf #1
>meet through online rp
>she's very sweet
>find out she has another gf
>"i'm polyamorous"
>bye
current bf
>meet online
>we compliment each other
>being together for four months, officially two
>i'm falling in love???
>>24370039
>letting your libido take control once you've established it's time to make out, without too much reservation. reservation good at first, bad after crossing the threshold
can you explain further?
>be in last week of August
>meet girl on tinder
>talk quick, learn from /fit/ that I need to meet in person quickly
>she says she cant meet the weekend
>decide lost cause
>she messages me again a few days after the weekend, we meet on a Thursday
>decide to meet at a bar
>she is an hour late
>she finally arrives. we talk in bar with loud music
>I am having to basically shout in her ear to talk to her
>accidentally kiss her on the cheek
>then look at her for a few seconds, then just go for the lip lock
>go to a movie after dinner. make out with her the entire time
>walk her to her car. she wants to kiss a bit more
>she never attempts to contact me again after we leave
>>24370094
>get on match.com
>they promise an additional 6 months if you don't find someone
>get the free six months
>delete account and spend next six months drunk and high by myself every night after work
>finally accept that I'm ugly and am going to die alone
I really think that offer is for females.
>okcupid
>see cute girl who's profile says I can help her lead her cult
>think that's funny, send her message
>pretty cool, set up date
>show up and she's with five friends
>drink and have a good time anyway
>anon, you wanna smoke?
>yeah I do
>go to her commune to go get high
>wait wut
>hippie dude asks me if I want to join in their next ceremony
>offered some ayahuasca
>politely decline
>watch hedwig and the angry inch while baked with a bunch of tripping people
7/10 would do again
>>24370266
men may have trouble detecting when their date has reached the 'ok time to start making out' stage, so I will start there.
the initial kiss should linger a little bit, not a peck. bodies should be close not just faces. if your date won't let your chest near theirs, he/she doesn't want to kiss and it's not meant to be. (at the end of the night it's ok to move a little closer and see how they react, and decide at that time whether to proceed).
so you give a kiss, then the faces part from each other and now you're staring a little bit at each other in the eyes. it's ok to stare at this point, you should. it tells the other that you're still in it. if they pull away obviously, abort. if not, proceed to reengage the kiss. if they pull away before contact the second time (this part is important) abort. you're done. but if they don't pull away. you have crossed the make out threshold.
that heart rate increase and heavier breathing? go ahead and let that happen (not alike a wild animal, you should not be able to hear the breathing loudly, though it is now stronger).
follow through with the second approach and this time move the body closer (your instincts will want to do this but may be held back by being scared). after that you'll figure it out.
I hope that helps
have any neets had success
seems like as soon as they find out you arent doing anything with your life they wouldnt ever contact you
>join dating website
>browse women that I don't need a plane ticket to see
>single mothers or ratchet ass black girls, sometimes both
>>24370430
Absolutely none of this sounds familiar. Looks like I get to die alone.
>>24370512
Hug her with both arms so she is pressed against you. Really close. If she is smiling, kiss her.
>>24370507
100% ENEMY
>>24370553
Who is this "her" you're referring to? I haven't been in the same room as a girl my age in months and those who were familiar have long since drifted away.
>fat chain smoking single mothers with neon hair and sleeve tattoos
Not exaggerating when I say that this is at least 50% of the females on sites like ok cupid.
I'd rather just be alone. I mean, I'm pretty much used to it at this point.
Is there any legit place for online meet-and-fucking that's not tinder?
>tfw no smartphone
>>24369897
i met a girl who was nothing like her pictures, i fucked off real quick, but other than that i've never had a bad experience with cupid or Pof
>on okc for over a year
>send as many messages to as many girls as possible
>even some of the hambeasts
>never got more than a one word response
I mean, come ON, I can't be that bad, right?I am that bad desu
I just want a redpilled conservative gf who would be willing to move into a self-sufficient homestead
>>24370430
This is complicated as shit. Haven't even gotten to the approach. Answer me anon. How did you learn this? To learn this you would have to first encounter situations like this but to encounter situations like this you need this knowledge.
>>24370631
>>24370512
well you have to be on a date with a woman/man you actually like in order for your body to respond/get aroused. that is not something i can tell you how to do.
>>24370714
you're not wrong.
the first times I was with someone I felt aroused but was too hesitant. other times I was too forward before determining whether my date was into me.
after a few times, I was able to get close, check for the signs, then actually make out.
i am conveying what i learned from trial and error to you now. it was hard work but i had no one to tell me what to expect or look for
>>24370722
So then how>>24370722
Why are you offering a mid-level class when you don't even have an entry-level class to cover the prerequisites?
>>24370752
>I was able to get close, check for the signs, then actually make out.
>check for signs
How do I do this? I've tried to learn body language before, but I really can't do it.
>>24370752
How did you get the date to begin with? I'm KHV autist and i need a hand. What did you say? Do? How do you comport yourself around a possible mate?
>>24370773
i'll restate one point from earlier by itself so it's easier to read:
staring at your eyes without saying anything is the sign they want to kiss or kiss again (if second time, more passionately)
>>24370469
yes, i've been neet for afew years, and it's never stopped me, but i'm not going to lie m8, if i had the job and car i'd be drowning in puss, girlfriends will eventually leave etc
>>24370795
dude I can't tell you that I'm sorry.
maybe another lurker has some insight. I've just figured out what to do once I have the opportunity. getting dates from scratch is hard dude, unless you're super duper good looking. I am not a pickup artist or anything I just know how to behave on a date
>>24370854
date information is useless without date but thanks anyway.
>>24370878
it's an abstract kind of feel. I'm sorry anon
>>24369897
>soda from the bar gun
don't dis that shit, for like 3 years, when I would get lunch with my brother I'd have to do that because every place cards in a college town
>>24370469
you like through your fucking teeth man
>>24370906
not cool on a date when we're both 21 bro
>>24370005
I was nervous already, but when my support group (yea, i call r9k that) mocked me i was crushed, i took an enormous leap of faith to make my tinder
>>24370553
>>24370430
>>24370302
JUSTheart literally hurts reading this
>>24370907
Pretty much this. The only time girls have ever showed any interest in me was when I lied my ass off. And this is while I have a stable job, a house, and plenty of disposable income.
I've had probably 10-12 dates with girls from okc as an introverted undiagnosed autist. 1x current long-term relationship of two years, 3x 4-6 month relationships, 6x less than 1 month flings, 2x bad first dates possibly just looking for a free meal. One of the 6 month ones fucked me up a bit, but apart from that it's been a positive experience.
>>24370795
This works for TINDER
TINDER
do NOT use those horrible PICK UP LINES unless you are god tier in looks
So you need the proper picture and proper bio which I won't get into unless you want me to
But swipe right on everyone. You can ignore people who you absolutely find disgusting, but practice texting game with them regardless.
Just an FYI I am 350 lbs, 5'9. I have a 5/10 face. but I have made this work.
Any match, ANY match. I start off with
>What are you up to today/tonight, you beautiful thing
They will usually say
>Not much
If they actually say what they are doing, you respond with
>Oh that's cool, blah blah
And you can go into it. However, only one response. The GOAL is to keep it short.
Then afterward you say something like
>So do you actually live in [TOWN] or do you live in [SURROUNDING TOWN]
They will respond with where they live
You can say
>Oh I live in (Central Town, SE side) you ever been there?
They will say Yes/No
You say
>There's a great coffee/yogurt/whatever shop there. Let's go on (add three days to whatever day you are on)
She will say yes or no
If she says no
>Oh, how about (then add two more days) or (add two additional days)
She will say yes or no
If she still says no, then don't fucking bother. Just say "oh ok, well let me know if you change your mind" and never talk to her again
If she says Yes,
Do NOT text her until the day before, just a
>Hey just checking to see we're still meeting at X at X time
Then when you meet her
one hour max for first date.
Start off with a handshake or hug
Follow the FORD model of first dates for all conversation
End with a hug, then you go in for the kiss.
That is literally how you do it.
I am a NEET. I am ugly as fuck. It works.
>>24370192
Online Dating: the female experience. Fuck off roastie you're not wanted here.
Through both Tinder and OKC, I've gotten honestly more dates than I care to count. Nothing has ever really stuck. Maybe a few extra dates afterwards, but nothing long lasting. I still have profiles to hold out hope, but the only long and meaningful relationships I've had were from real life encounters first.
>>24369572
i met the person i'm in an online relationship with(first and only relationship ever) through a game we mutually played. we're meeting tomorrow for the first time after over a year and going to iem in san jose.
tinder and okcupid are for superficial normie shitbags, and you are one if you use these "dating" apps.
IT
DOESN'T
FUCKING
WORK
CHADS EVERYWHERE AND WOMAN JUST IGNORE YOU!
FUCK ONLINE DATING! ONLINE DATING IS SOMETHING ONLY LOSERS SHOULD DO! NOT CHADS
FUCK THIS GAY EARTH!
>>24370978
I wanted to add
for the hug part for you true autismos
Go in for the hug, the hug lasts 2-3 seconds. Your chin will rest on her shoulder.
Afterward, your hug, keep your arms around her even though the hug has ended and your faces are far apart
Look into her eyes for 3 seconds
Then you can either say "Im going to kiss you now" or just go in for the kiss
>>24370822
>staring at your eyes without saying anything is the sign they want to kiss
I can't maintain eye contact for more than 1 second. I literally can't. Hell, I can't get into a situation where I would be staring into anyone's eyes. How do I get into that situation in the first place, keeping in mind that understanding body language is beyond me?
>>24371044
You're fucked, anon. We're all fucked.
>browse OKC
>typical woman dating profile
>"looking for a real man no games no drama have a kid who is my world and comes first, also you must make good money and be ambitious and active in the world"
>say fuck that and quit as do many men
>women wonder why guys aren't interested in them anymore
>mfw
The sexodus is real.
>>24371067
>tfw diagnosed with ASD about a year ago
>tfw never had a relationship before then
>tfw now know I will never have a relationship
Lol this thread pisses me off slightly, you guys are probably not legit robots/neets, and if you get multiple dates on online dating sites. As most single guys struggling with...
Tried okcupid for a week and gave up. I tried going for some short haired genderfluid gal, I'd expected her to be non judgemental of my features, she'd promise to be responsive, and guess what? she reported me. All I said "hey, how does feel float a boat between two places?'
I think based on my race, gender, and class I'd be better off with short term dating. I'd probably try tinder.
>>24371183
>genderfluid
There's your mistake. Don't try for batshit crazy degenerate women.
>>24370978
>>24371031
Thanks. Saved my life. Gonna put on notepad and practice in the morning.
>>24370978
Please tell me about proper picture and proper bio. I need this.
>>24371183
>implying i'm here to share stories
>implying im not here to get my first hug
>>24371183
if i could be bothered i could meet more, but not from online, online they just send "hey" as a first message and expect me to give a shit asif i'm the one trying to pick her up, and will also whinge if you send "hey" as a first message
if you can get passed being shy, offline is much easier although i don't have any friends here so online is my best bet sadly
>>24371258
you need to get matches on tinder first
>>24371304
proper picture: have 2-4
First one needs to be a headshot picture,
it needs to accentuate your jaw line is the most important thing. Google it if you don't know how. Get a professional if you look terrible. Second picture needs to be you in a social setting. Other pictures are near irrelevant.
Proper bio: 2 sentences is ideal. Say something funny. Say something you would never say in real life. Puns are good here.
Example bio I used that got me like 15 girls one day "I hate my self when I'm wrong. I'm currently hating myself now"
Half the girls messaged me first saying "why do you hate yourself what did you do wrong" and other bs
>>24371183
>"hey, how does feel float a boat between two places?'
Well she reported you because you talk like a spammer.
Anyway I just use OKC and POF to fuck single moms or boost my ego. I've given up trying to find an actual worthwhile woman online. Women on there are almost always trash.
I get lots of girls who like me and never say anything, or they'll do the thing they tell guys not to do and say "Hi". Fills me with disgust every single time.
>>24370978
How do you write a proper bio? all i see is "town/some hobbys/what they are not looking for"
in that format
>>24371621
see
>>24371535
Like I said I'm not some master at this. It just has worked for me and i'm fat, short, ugly, and super boring. I can never get past the 3rd date because I have nothing in common with anyone (I just browse 4chan all day)
I've has success with POF, Tinder, and OK Cupid in the last 2 months. Tinder is probably my least favorite, especially after the latest update though it's gotten me laid the most.
>>24370935
well there's your problem. You need to learn to handle criticism when putting yourself out there. don't give up anon you can get a gf.
>numerous women have asked me out
>go stone cold Autist mode when flirted with
>only one woman initiated everything
>only exgf I've ever had
>too shy for online dating
Feels bad man
Yeah, I just recently broke up with my GF of 2 years.
I went on one Tinder date so far but fucked it up pretty bad. Only kissed, didn't get a text back.
I just matched with like 16 cuties today. Hopefully it goes well and I can get laid with at least one of them, because I'm horny as hell.
