So I recently went on a date with a guy I met on Tinder
>The audience chuckles nervously
I wore a t-shirt that said "CASUAL SEX" across the chest so he'd immediately know what I wanted
>The audience laughs heartily
We made it about halfway through the appetizer before I was choking on his cock in the rest room
>The audience begins laughing so hard they burst into flame and their lungs explode. They start pissing themselves from laughter, which fails to put out the flames but makes everything smell like burnt hair and urine. An older gentleman has a heart attack and dies on the floor, burning and covered in piss. The earth trembles below the stage, opening a gaping crack into the underbelly of the earth. Several members of the audience are dragged into the blackness, laughing so hard blood spills from their mouths as they descend into the molten core of the earth, smashing into the rock as they fall. The continued laughter echoes off the rock, causing the largest known earthquake in history, crippling the powergrids of several of the world's major cities, plunging humankind into darkness for weeks. Martial law is called into effect as the riots increase in size and aggressiveness. As food begins to run out, half the world's populace is dead, with the survivors now resorting to cannibalism and subsistence farming.
>>23309232
i love this meme
fuck women stupid whores am i rite guys hahaha
>>23309232
whats wrong virgil? amy shumer is funny. deal wit it
>>23309232
>mfw I got a girl that looks just like her pregnant
>>23309247
They are. They're whores for chad and by the time your average joe gets them, they're all used up and boring cunts. Life is suffering, nothing will ever improve for us robots.
Lying bitch Says she weighs 160 pounds
I want Amy Schumer to smother me to death with her flabby ass
>>23309282
who tf is virgil
>>23309326
Not all women, you are just mad that you are alone or have had some bad women rolemodels in your life. It's ok I forgive you though, I understand why you are sad because I am sad too
>>23309282
>amy shumer is funny
This statement is funnier than any joke that fat whore has ever made.
The only acceptable comedian is Norm Macdonald
>>23309448
not all women :^)
>I'm fat
>I like sex
>with lots of strange men
>what's the deal with men anyway?
>ughh periods amirite?
>*shoehorns feminist talking points*
Literally every female 'comedian' ever. Schumer is no different, she's just even fatter and uglier than usual for female 'comedians'.
>>23309448
Any of the desirable women. Hell, even a good number of undesirable women because they get dicked down by Chad once and then they think they're hot shit.
>>23309477
if she isnt funny then why is she getting paid to tell jokes and you're not lmao. i bet you try to tell me that the beatles aren't good to
>haha my taste is better than urs hooohoho
literally u
be gentle, I think hes funny
(Absolute best comedian is Jim Carrey)
>>23309518
yes anon, every women is exactly the same
keep on thinking this, it will do your life good
>>23309615
What's funny is he's probably never done a single stand up act yet he's still better than Amy 'fat slut' Schumer at comedy. There's nothing wrong with pretending to like her. I get where you're coming from. You pretend to like feminism and be a nice guy and eventually one of the bitches you're orbiting will suck your dick. Let us know how that pans out for you.
>>23309422
she look like a melting candy bar tbh
