Post Appocalyptic Adventure Thing, part 5
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Oh shit nigger, you're a Wasteland Paladin in some Generic Post Apocalyptic Wasteland. Your mission is to protect the innocents, purge the heretics, kill the evil mutants, yadda yadda all that stuff.
But currently you're just loitering around the Paladin base, what do you do?
Roll 1d10, highest roll in a minute since the first reply gets picked.
Previous threads:
http://pastebin.com/sR3G3F2A
https://www.mediafire.com/folder/ici3zlnn9ytyy/ADVENTURES
Oh and you just sent your son to infiltrate a necrobot base.
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>166615
punch self in face
switch to son
Rolled 9 (1d10)
>>166615
Punch son in face. Switch to self
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>166615
Grab something to eat first at the cafeteria.
>>166617
Youa re now Paladin Son. Your mission is to infiltrate the Necrobot base and get their technologies with only a tranq gun because your dad is a cheap bastard
>>166624
Go get some food
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>166624
Dad shows us a choice of companions
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>166625
Oops
Rolled 2 (1d10)
>>166624
Eat some food at the cafeteria. You haven't eaten anything since forever.
>>166626
"Alright, you get to choose between:
-Nothing
-A board with a face drawn on"
Rolled 9 (1d10)
>>166633
choose the mystery box option
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>166633
what about a weaboo? we need an otocon
Rolled 2 (1d10)
>>166633
Choose hot paladin girl
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>166633
Mystery box
>>166637
"What? Weeaboo paladin?"
"The katana is the bestest weapon ever"
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>166646
well yeah for our sneak mission we need an otoku
>>166649
"It's "otaku" you baka"
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>166646
Discuss waifus with this kindred spirit
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>166651
Recruit him
LOCK IN
Rolled 2 (1d10)
>>166651
what ever fagadin, let's go
>>166649
Throw that shit katana and switch to light saber
>>166654
"Nah, the lock's out there"
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>166659
nigga, just get in my party
>>166662
"Why? Is it your birthday?"
Rolled 1 (1d10)
>>166665
yes
Rolled 6 (1d10)
>>166665
just leave without the otoku
this is a sneaking mission after all
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>166673
YOU'RE AMBUSHED BY A MUTANT PUPPY
Rolled 9 (1d10)
>>166673
Punch your face.
>>166680
You come across dick justice remains.
Rolled 2 (1d10)
>>166683
>>166680
Get ambushed mutant kitty
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>166680
Justice rains from above.
Then spider missiles.
Rolled 8 (1d10)
>>166693
It licks youit actually has rabies
>>166693
Pet it and pelt it.
Rolled 8 (1d10)
>>166696
turns out that tongue was so powerful it launched you into space
Rolled 2 (1d10)
>>166696
Time to get a rabies shot.
Rolled 9 (1d10)
>>166696
Suddenly fleas.
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>166704
Bug spray
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>166704
woops, there goes all your blood
Rolled 7 (1d10)
>>166711
Balls to the wall action.
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>166711
roll your eye
Rolled 1 (1d10)
>>166711
You pass out from the blood loss
Rolled 2 (1d10)
>>166711
Back to the mission
Rolled 8 (1d10)
>>166719
Alright enough distractions
get to the necrobot base
Rolled 4 (1d10)
>>166719
Necrobot paintball players on the lose.
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>166719
Try to ride the flea.
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>166731
Mutant Puppy and Flee follow you
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>166731
find an airvent
Rolled 9 (1d10)
>>166736
Arrive at necrobot base
>>166736
Kill that puppy
Rolled 1 (1d10)
>>166744
Use your ID to get in
Rolled 9 (1d10)
>>166744
It's actually a strip club
Rolled 6 (1d10)
>>166749
Skip, I only prefer secret bases with strip club.
>>166752
YOu skipped
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>166753
Camp outside as if you are doing a seize
>>166757
Roast your mutant puppy.
Rolled 7 (1d10)
>>166757
have a party, but weaboo isn't invited
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>166757
barge your way in by using the puppy to lick you into the door
Rolled 8 (1d10)
>>166766
Alright, time to infiltrate
>>166767
Alrighty then
Rolled 6 (1d10)
>>166768
put on your necrobot mask so you don't have to sneak like a worm
Rolled 7 (1d10)
>>166768
ring ring
Irs Mie Ling she checking up for some reason
Rolled 6 (1d10)
>>166768
You have an amnesia because of head injury just now.
Rolled 2 (1d10)
>>166774
No, it's his concussion
Rolled 7 (1d10)
>>166774
hey dad how's mom?
Rolled 4 (1d10)
>>166778
She died trying to make love with muties
Rolled 6 (1d10)
>>166778
cry
>>166781
Which is weird because you definitely remember mom being alive
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>166784
Get back to the mission
>>166784
Dad is actually his mom. He is a transvestite.
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>166784
I dream of a dream of time gone byyyyy
>>166785
You can hear footsteps, somone's coming this way
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>166789
it's a guard walking on his hands
Rolled 8 (1d10)
>>166789
it's actually your bro who you shared a room with
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>166789
it's the new line of fembots
>>166791
Ah yes, you remember him. Necrobot No.6792
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>166793
yell out to him
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>166793
He's actually just a human in a shitty necrobot disguise
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>166793
play a joke on him
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>166798
BROTHER?!
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>166802
Brother is the leader of the necrobots
Rolled 8 (1d10)
>>166802
YOU'RE THE LEADER OF THE NECROBOTS?
>>166804
"The who in the what now?"
Rolled 7 (1d10)
>>166802
is he liquid necrobot?
Rolled 1 (1d10)
>>166806
It was just an illusion, quick tranq him
Rolled 9 (1d10)
>>166806
Show us your true face, BROTHER
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>166811
ENGAGE HIM IN CQC
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>166811
make necrobot costume out of cardboard boxes, quick!
Rolled 8 (1d10)
>>166811
envy his hair
>>166814
This means you had to be shirtless for some reason
Rolled 1 (1d10)
>>166820
Grab him and throw him to the floor
Rolled 1 (1d10)
>>166820
Kick his ass so much that you turn him intoLiquid
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>166820
go pants less, he's not wearing pants, why should he have all the fun?
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>166820
It's time to DUEL.
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>166826
that's better, lather yourself in oil
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>166830
Now drop some beets.
Rolled 4 (1d10)
>>166830
Quick call for help
Rolled 2 (1d10)
>>166830
Grab the robot by behind and inject him with nanomachines
Rolled 4 (1d10)
>>166830
CHOKE SLAM HIM
Rolled 8 (1d10)
>>166837
Use your slickness to grease up his roboparts
>>166837
It's called being alive DAd
Rolled 4 (1d10)
>>166837
Eat penis shaped health bar
Rolled 8 (1d10)
>>166837
CQC the robot and inject him with nanomachines
Rolled 8 (1d10)
>>166844
He melts into a normal human
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>166845
and his name is Solidass
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>166844
he melts in to a snek
>>166845
Who is also not wearing shirts or pants.
Yep.
Just too almost naked oily dudes grappling eachother who also happens to be related. Nothing wrong here.
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>166853
Interrogate him
Ask why he became a necrobot
Rolled 9 (1d10)
>>166853
Smooch his beautiful mouth faggot.
Rolled 7 (1d10)
>>166853
WHERE'S THE GOLD!?
>>166853
Ask your BROTHER how he feels right now, and how we'll find MYRELyour ex
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>166857
fug
roll
Rolled 9 (1d10)
>>166855
In a non-gay brotherly way of course
>>166855
Oh c'mon, it's not THAT beautiful
>>166859
With lots of tongue ofcourse.
Rolled 1 (1d10)
>>166861
how could you resist those fabulous lips
DO IT
Rolled 8 (1d10)
>>166861
It's too beautiful. You pass out
Rolled 9 (1d10)
>>166861
Give him your spare sneaking suit and go find your necrobot ex in the ladies bathroom
Rolled 4 (1d10)
>>166861
do it to make your dad mad, I mean we're not gay but that what a white teenage girl would and who are we to not follow such and example.
Rolled 1 (1d10)
>>166861
Lick it in a creepy manner.
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>166868
we still sneaking with oiled up brother dragging us through the vents
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>166868
You wake up to find you are a necrobot.
What happened to necron bro?
Did I miss thread?
>>166876
This is necro bro
You missed a thread
>>166876
he was so purged he became human again with a mullet and eye patch.
>>166882
>looking like snake
>fate worse than death
What are you on about sonny?
>>166882
RULES OF NATURE!
>>166871
Indeed.
It;s jsut that the vents have no lights
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>166888
You wake up in the brig
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>166888
Move towards that weird smell
>>166890
THAT WEIRD SMELL IS WHAT YOU'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR THENECRO GEAR
>>166890
Oh yes, let's move over there to that weird smell.
Man, these vents are really spacious
Rolled 4 (1d10)
>>166891
fug, forgot roll again
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>166892
The weird smell is an old used up teddy
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>166891
There's an opening in the vents, and you can see the necro gear clearly, but also your old bot nemesis, Ocebot
>>166894
Oh man it is. Let's examine it more clearly in this completely dark vent
Rolled 9 (1d10)
>>166897
yes clearly the features are well defined
Add to inventory
Rolled 8 (1d10)
>>166897
Why are we in the vent again?
>>166899
And so you did
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>166901
Turn on light which you have on your suit
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>166901
Call up the samurai paladin
Rolled 4 (1d10)
>>166901
Keep crawling until you find an opening
Rolled 4 (1d10)
>>166901
You wake up in the Brig
>>166902
YOu discarded your clothes when you CQC'd your brother, rememberrrrrWelp, I gotta go now, won't be back in 2-3 hours. Will have to put thread on hold until then. Sorry bout that.
>>166907
rip in peace op
>>166907
Have a nice rest OPerino
Aight, who' still here
Me
>>166986
me
>>166986
me baybeh
>>166986
better get cracking on that drawing son, less you want super with the cowfolk.
>>166908
>>166989
>>166990
>>166991
Well that's enough
Probably
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>166995
the vent breaks we fall on top of Ocebot with our brother oiled up and spilling the spegehtti
>>166997
well no point rolling now
>>166997
This
>>167000
not with those trips
Rolled 1 (1d10)
>>167001
All three of you realize you're wearing the same underwear
Rolled 8 (1d10)
>>167001
I don't see the meat balls
>>167006
They're right heerrrreeee
Rolled 9 (1d10)
>>167007
Eat the spaghetti to regain your stamina
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>167007
Ocebot engages brother and you in a duel
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>167007
they beef or turkey or pork? Ocebot is jewish, this might affect things
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>167016
then we remember dear ol unca' scrooge
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>167016
level up
Rolled 9 (1d10)
>>167016
Surprise skeleton cameo
>>167019
again? we will never have a continuity where they don't show up, it's a blessing and a curse.
Rolled 2 (1d10)
>>167020
find the mystery box ... what's your name again? said the encased skull
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>167020
Steal dead skeleton skull
>>167025
he wasn't in disguised as that Weaboo samurai paladin?
>>167025
Ah yes, you're in the Artifact Room.
Right next to The Skull of The Traitor is the Glasses of the Weeaboo One
>>167026
Nah, other paladin would sure notice that he's a skeleton. Their swords would glow or some shit.
Rolled 7 (1d10)
>>167027
blame plot!
>>167030
Yeaaaah...wonder who could that be...sounds like a crook...an incredibly handsome and cool crook.....anyway, mission, yes
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>167035
Roll around until you find a safe spot. No one can spot you while you're rolling
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>167027
Those are just spare glasses. He cant be dead. I bet there is a skeleton hideout of some sort. But thats a story for other time.
Rolled 2 (1d10)
>>167035
I'm getting call it's Mei Ling again
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>167044
The fat Necrobot spots you. Why did they make fat ones?
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>167044
What a useful cardboard box you found it basically renders you invisible!
Rolled 4 (1d10)
>>167044
now do a trick to confuse like throwing your voice or something
>>167047
"I thought becoming a necrobot would mean I won't be fat anymore"
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>167053
bully him for being fat
Rolled 10 (1d10)
>>167053
we both didn't get what we wanted, RIGHT MIE LING!
Rolled 1 (1d10)
>>167053
"I guess you're just big roboned"
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>167060
He's so demotivated that he just lets you pass
Rolled 6 (1d10)
>>167060
call him a faggot and give him a robo-wedgie
Rolled 4 (1d10)
>>167060
Rage mode activated. All nectobots alerted. ABORT!
Rolled 4 (1d10)
>>167060
Whats your brother doing?
Rolled 4 (1d10)
>>167060
oil him up
Rolled 6 (1d10)
>>167069
It sets an arm off
Rolled 9 (1d10)
>>167069
plot
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>167075
Fat necrobot activates berserk modboss fight music starts playing
Rolled 9 (1d10)
>>167075
Horry shieto
the need alarm went off find some boxes quick while summersaulting
>>167078
supposed to say nerd alarm* I'm keeping my roll
>>167078
Because that's what every stealth game needs.
Ninja flips
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>167080
just a flipping box nothing out of the ordinary here
Rolled 1 (1d10)
>>167080
You land in a oil puddle
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>167080
You flip into the necro bot secret room
>>167082
"Yep"
"Totally normal"
Rolled 9 (1d10)
>>167088
You flip all the way to the next boss room!
Rolled 1 (1d10)
>>167088
plot bam! Onomonpias every where
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>167088
A box necrobot appears!
Rolled 1 (1d10)
>>167096
light turns on its
....
!
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>167096
This is a fat necrobot in berserk mode
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>167096
The boss is a giant box with legs.
>>167100
DUN DUN DUN
Rolled 5 (1d10)
>>167111
Go around and turn him off because boxes cant move
Rolled 9 (1d10)
>>167111
along with the leader of the necrobots, robogreg
Rolled 3 (1d10)
>>167111
Use him to hide from necrobots.
