Middle Adventures #1
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Welcome To Middle Adventure #1 you and your band of travelers have decided to take the kings quest and slay the Orc encampment
>6 players to start
>You all start out at level 1
>choose your class
>Have fun
>>136197
Dwarven Battle Bard reporting for duty.
>>136197
Human Swordmage here!
>>136223
I be Dilbin
>>136235do you know how to put names in posts?
>>136247
I have no time for ye bandying about, lad. There are things to kill and shinies to had!
Human Redneck Ranger in.
>Quick Reminder that I didn't put in the beginning be sure to add a picture to your Character
>>136268
Happy to oblige.
>>136270
This here be me.
>>136284
'Dose er some gud bagpipes.
>>136270
Oh, no problem!
Human Gun Mage - Rifleman!
High Elven Swordsman
>>136310
We'z gon' get erlong jus' fine.
>>136310
My picture, whoops.
>>136329
Yes sir indeed. So long as you keep making that whiskey.
>>136343
Oh ya mean Uncle Earl's moonshine? Yeah I can get ya sum, just keep on playin' dem pipes an' I'll git ya all ya need.
>>136351
That's the dwarf, friend. My rifle is my only instrument.
>>136363
Ah sorry mista. Broke mah glazzes when I was tweny-fou, can't tell the differnce 'tween a tall guy wit a gun and a short guy wit a pipe. Mah sincerest apologies
So sorry gentlemen but it appears the king is starting to get a bit impatient so i believe your sixth traveler will not be joining you on this evening so I assume everyone is ready to begin their quest?
So we're waiting on one more. I'm driving, so I'll be a little slow to reply till I get back
>>136401
Yep! Again driving so I'll be a little slow but be patient. I'm here. -Sloan
>>136401
I'z good if tha resta y'all's ready to go.
>>136401
I am ready. These orcs won't know what hit them judging by the looks of our party.
Human fighter!
>>136401
Please, let us get this quest underway.
>>136401
Wait! QM! I'm all read to go t't orc encampment and kill the bastards!
>>136443
Are youz the fella who mah great aunt twice remov'd's granny kid married?
Ah I see your sixth man decided to show
so now that the group is together you all decide to start your journey.
You all walk miles and miles until you stop for a brief moment at a nearby river until you see a girl a helpless Elven girl and everyone knows the Dwarves and Elves dont like eachother.
Decide what to do
>>136475
I shall approach the poor girl, and see what issues ail her
>>136475
An elven girl in the woods near a river? She's hardly helpless, this is how they live their lives.
>>136475
Why'z she helpless? She got 'er leg caugh' in a bear trap or somtin?
>>136475
Sounds like t' start o' a romantic folk ballad t' me!
I lean on m' pitchfork in a manly way.
>>136487
Ahd like ta get mah dynamite ready. jus' incase she tries some'n funny.
I'll be brave and approach her diplomatically.
"MISS DO YOU NEED HELP?"
>>136487
You approach the young girl only to see that she is no older than 5 years old
she seems scared but you look at her and ask
"What happened?"
she replies
"The Orcs happened"
you all gather round after you hear the deep roar of what sounds like an Orc
It was a trap!
You all must decide on your next plan of action
>>136531
I ready my pitchfork and defend t' fair maiden!
Rolled 76 (1d100)
>>136531
IMMA BLOW 'EM UP!
>>136531
Those damnable orcs, using a poor elven girl as bait for their trap.
I take out my longsword and prepare to fight.
Loading up the rifle with the fireball rounds. Uses one to shoot the elf girl in the head.
>>136559
DAS RIGHT! KILL DEM ELVES! THEY TOOK MAH UNCLE EARL'S JERB!
As the Orcs come swarming out of the woodwork you all try your best to defend yourselves and then in the distance you see him
Grommok, The legendary Orc chief
He comes right right for Jebediah
What are you going to do?
I cast magic Missle in to the darkness.
>>136586
IMMA BLOW DAT BIG GREEN BASTARD UP TOO! SLOAN, DILBIN, 'ELP ME BLAST DIS SON'BITCH TO KINGDOM COME!
Rolled 1 (1d20)
>>136586
Kill any orcs that come near to me with my pitchfork and try to move closer to Jebediah to help him fight the orc chief.
>>136586
It is time for my blade to taste blood, I shall stab the nearest orc, while protecting the elf girl
Rolled 98, 40 = 138 (2d100)
>>136608
FO'GOT MAH ROLL!
>>136615
Oh ya don diddly done it Brian! I move to help out mah fellow fermer, tryna save him from himself.
(Second roll for saving him)
You all try your hardest but none of you are able to penetrate his thick Orcish skin
Jebediah is down but still breathing
He now sets his sight on Gerard
What are you going to do?
Rolled 85 (1d100)
>>136626
Are we rolling d100's? I guess here's mine then
Rolled 43 (1d100)
>>136635
If he wants to charge me, then I will provide a spiked wall for him to meet. I aim for the upper chest and neck with a diagonal slash
Rolled 78 (1d100)
>>136635
MO' DYNAMITE! IMMA KILL ALL THESE SONSOFABITCHES IF AH HAVE TO!
>>136646
Your spiked wall has only merely blocked him but he is not dead this gives time for you to go help up Jebediah who is now up and ready for the fight again
The only way for you all to win this is if you all find a way to put your powers together.
But how will you do it?
>>136635
I check on my brother farmer Jebediah and give 'im some strong cider from my flask.
I hold my gun in the air and yell Lightning!
Rolled 33 (1d100)
>>136678
My roll
Rolled 83 (1d100)
>>136678
I hold my pitchfork high to conduct t' lightnin' through the metal and ah throw the pitchfork at the orc chief!
>>136674
>>136678
>>136666
GERARD! KEEP THAT BASTARD STUCK! BRIAN, THAT IS SUM MIGHTY FINE CIDER! SLOAN, SHOOT ALL THE DYNAMITE I THROW! DIBLIN, PIPE LIKE THERE'S NO TOMORRA!
Rolled 62 (1d100)
>>136664
If they're aiming to electrocute him with a pitchfork, then I will look to open a gash in his hide for them to strike
Rolled 16 (1d100)
WHY DOES MAH ROLL NOT WORK!?
I will direct the excess lightning to also ignite the dynamite.
You manage to hit him with the lightning and he is now stunned as Gerard moves in he puts a giant gash in his back hide but he is pushed away by another orc now there is only Farmer Brian in the line of sight so he has only one shot to kill
>>136724
I BELIEVE IN YER FERMER BRIAN!
Rolled 79 (1d100)
>>136724
"DIE, YE BASTARD!"
I run at the orc and try to shove it over. I grab my pitchfork off the ground and try to stab it, and if I manage to stab it then I use my foot to drive the pitchfork in.
Rolled 98 (1d100)
>>136717
>>136744
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! FERMER PERWER!
>>136747
TEAMWERK MOTHERLOVERS!
You manage to stab the pitchfork in his back and then you watch as the last few Orcs are killed
You turn the body over and you cut off the head of the Orc chief and you bring it back to the king to show him.
"Wonderful" he says
You are all paid your fair share of gold and then you all meet up at the local tavern as the people celebrate your victory
Rolled 4 (1d100)
>>136776
YA DONE DIDLY DONE IT BRIAN! ROLLIN' FOR CELERBATIONS!
Rolled 18 (1d100)
>>136789
Ye call that a celebration roll? Ye couldn't get a party hat fer that!
This's a celebration roll!
Rolled 31 (1d100)
Rolling for fucking wenches
Rolled 72 (1d100)
>>136798
FERMER BRIAN AH THINK WE BURNT DOWN DA TOWN! ROLLIN' TO SUMMON MA PICK UP TRUCK SPIRIT ANIMAL!
>>136805
FUCK YEAH
Rolled 15 (1d100)
Also here's my celebration
OP? WHERE YA BE? I NEEDZ TA MAKE MY EPIC MOONSHINE SHOT!
No, OP...
Do I 'ave to cast down my drystone wall t' make yer gravestone so soon?!
IF AH 'AVE TO COME UP DERE AND BLOW YOU BACK DOWN TA EARTH I SWEAR TO THA LORD ABOVE I WILL DO IT!
Fuck it, momma always tol' me I was a "not so bad is gud" story-teller, wan' me to try an' take a shot at this whole OP thing?
>>136911
I'll back yer! Go fer it!
>>136920
Awlright.
Now, afta you boyz got dun with killin' all dem Orc fellers and the damn Elf girl, a whole lotta the folks in town thought you lot to be nothin' shorta heroes. The partys done gone and burnt through the town's whole store a whiskey! But the big ol' man in the castle didn't take kindly to that, thought y'all were nothin' but a buncha of drunken country bumpkins lookin' for their next stash of moonshine. Fermer Brian in particular, despite being the man who struck da killin' blow, was seen as a threat. A small bounty's been placed on him, with riders bein' sent out to alert the neighborin' lords of his danger. Fortunately, since our shenanigans done blown up mosta the roads outta town, they'll take a month to reach most of em. But the quesion remains, what're you gon' do?
>A) Stay in town, hope to ride out the storm
>B) Head west, for Lord Connor.
>C Head east, for Lord Hichi
>D) Head north, for Lord Ivan
>E) Head South for Lord Julius
>F)Write in
>>136958
>C Head east, for Lord Hichi
Ya done found a kiddie's map o' the region.
>>136958
Agreed. Head east.
>>136981
Fermer Brian 'cides it'd be a good idear to get outta dodge, and packs up 'is meagre possersions to head east fer the sandy dunes o' the desert kingdom of Taben, ruled by lord Hichi. Place's renowned all over fer its lumbering cities, guarded by them oriental Knights o' the Silver Scorpion. These boyz ain't on Fermer Brian's mind though, he's just worried how he's gon' get through tha muck of the greenie Orc bodies 'fore the king's rider gets there.
>2 days pass.
The familiar lookin' pine trees o' Nera 'ave given up this far into tha desert, replaced by tiny little shrubs that remind mah brain o' the porcupine I used to keep as a pet back at Pa's farm. You can see that there's a big ol' bastard walkin in the distance, with a city tied to 'is back and all sorta flyin' machines goin' up and down. One of em stops, 'avin seen ya walkin', and takes ya up.
>You have arrived in Hishi, capital of Taben!
What're you gon' do?
>>137037
Find the nearest pub.
Dis ere's an idear of what tah city looks like, pardon mah drawin' skills. Or lack therof.
>>137053
Fermer Brian asks around, and after a few people started to give ya some loose change 'cause they thought y'all were a buncha poor beggas', you get directions to the Cliffside Inn, place right along tha edge of the city where all sortsa people come an' go fer a good tihm.
As ya boyz walk on in, ya find the place packed. Humans, Dwarves, an' even a few o' them sneaky lookin' Amph fellas are gettin' busy drinkin' away, or gettin' busy with the local girls. Plenty o tem to go 'round....Sorry, got a bit distracted there! The bartenda's a human man, with a thick and bushy black beard coverin' up his dark brown face. He waves, nice man.
>>137080
>What're you boyz gon' do? An' ya want me ta keep talking like dis or ya want that proper city-folk language?
>>137080
Brian is right. This is a party game after all
-Sloan
>>137108
Right, sorry there fella, jus' used to rollin' with it. I'll give it five minutes after a post startin' now for actions. Whiche'er gets the most wins.
>>137117
Sorry there Sloan, Ah got caught up with it. I'mma be more careful from now on.
you taking new players?
>>137143
Ahm always welcome to new folks 'round ere.
After Fermer Brian an' Sloan enter, they notice a fella wearin' sum fancy lookin' armor and carryin' one o those commie hammers with im enter behind them. Maybe he'll help em out somehow.
Rolled 15 (1d20)
>>137153
Imma try to get one if then lizard girls
>>137108
>"Greetings, stranger, welcome to the Cliffside Inn. And an order of cider is coming right up! That will be two coins please."
Man these city folk 'er polite, 'specially considrin' they're ridin' a giant tortoise for a city. A red headed woman with what looks like a sack coverin' everythin' 'neath her chest and leavin' everythin' above it naked as the day she was born brings you the drinks.
>>137163
Sloan 'cides to 'ave a bit o fun, and pulls aside one o the Amph girls, shorty by their stand'rds but still 'bout 5'6". She's purple, rare color for em, with big green eyes like the 'ills of Abedire.
>"Uhm, hello sir. What do you need?"
Short while later, Sloan's got himself a scaley lady friend named Ashea.
Rolled 6 (1d20)
>>137191
Excellent. I'll offer the lady to be my permanent traveling companion, which includes food and shelter and adventures. (Probably)
>>137191
I give the barman two copper coins and say
"This's been a good year in t' west fer cauliflower. D'y' grow cauliflower?"
>>137234
suggest that cauliflower, a water extensive plant, would not thrive in these lands.
>>137213
>"Uh..sir. I'm afraid I cannot accompany you. My liege, commandant Yertu, is currently here on a diplomatic mission to ensure that my people will be ensured access to the local region's water deposits while on our trading missions, and as soon as he is done I will have to depart for Heyanta. So no, I am sorry."
Judgin' by ta way 'er shoulders drop'd after answerin' that question o yers, she feels pretty damn bad about it.
>>137234
>"Cauliflower? Sir, we do not have the luxury of growing plants of that nature out here. Instead, we harvest our foods from the Giant that carries us. This cider is imported, but the rest we either hunt or grow within the creature. And, Gods be Blessed, he actually gets healthier from it!"
He pulls up a small bottle with a dark green liquid inside.
"Bera Bat juice, marvelous drink. Ten coins if you would like this bottle."
>>137258
The man who walked in wit' y'all, MC Hammer, has point'd out tah hole in Fermer Brian's logic.
Rolled 9 (1d20)
>>137263
Imma go assassinate him.
Sloan asks the girl where this mofo is at all cool like. And gives her ass a slap (dice)
>>137281
"much obliged, the name's Richard Jor'gund. Ah'm a proud Aberdiren, born and raised. Farm boy for most of it, 'fore the war. Afterwards, well, I wasn't gonna throw away the only good things Ah got from it. Figured that Taben would be nice after the snows in Povt. Why're you here, if not to enjoy the weather?"
>>137281
The two o youse split the bottl' like friends catchin' up afta not seein' eachotha for a lon' time. The juice tastes a bit like if ya stuck a slice o orange and mixed it with beef in a blenda', but it's real tart like a sour candy. All in all, is'a "These desert folk'sve got some weird-ass tastes'in drinks" outta five. The man glady takes ya coins, and counting out yer stash now you reckon you've got 'bout 50 coppa coins 'tween the three o' you. No' bad, just prolly not 'nough to get yer fair lick o' da pie.
>>137303
Sloan done though it'd be a gooder idea, insteada standin' 'round saying a few words to his girly frien' , that he go and take out the root o tha problem, this Yertwo fella. But not 'fore plantin' has big hand right across that sweet and squishy rear end o' Ashea. Onl' problem with this was she didn't seem ta particular' enjoy it, and let outta Hell ofa holler. Fortunately no one imp'rtant seemed to hear 'er, but she returned Sloan's gesture with a smack that sent tha poor fella right into a table.
>>137326
"I am on a venture t' find new plants and seeds to grow back on my farm. I 'ear there are rare spices 'ere in the east."
>>137371
"Certainly better than scratching at the poor soil of Nera for your whole life.
Though good luck growing the spices back home, seems they ony grow in certain places, lest they wouldn't be worth the cost
>>137352
I ask the barman if 'e has any bar snacks.
Now, Imma let you boyz know I am extremely tuckered out from a long day, and am gonna be unconscientious soon, y'all wanna pick this up later?
>>137427
>>137326
Fellas you've not go' the slightiest clue how nice it is to see playa's talking back n' forth like this, and Sloan's antics make it all the betterer.
>>137382
Recoverin' from the blow to 'is pride, Sloan starts lookin for this Mewtwo feller. An' boy is he easy to pick out, sonovabitch looks to be 7'8" at least, with a big cresty thing 'top his dome, coated in shiny jewels and goldy bits. Pretty big con'tast wit' his face though. Wrinkled, shri'led up, generally lookin' like a pieca jerky too cooked to eat. Looks to be s'rounded by guards, all a few inches shorter than him, and with heavy blue plates co'ering up their scales, and sharp double bladed axes in both'er their hands.
>>137433
>"Yes, I have snacks. Do you like peanut sticks?"
The barkeep pulls up a cup with a whole loada finger length sticks, covered in salt and lookin' a bit like pipe shaped pretzels.
Righ then, pick this up Wednesday, 6 P.M.?
>>137494
Sloan figa's it'd be a good plan tah eliminate the height difference 'tween him and his soon-to-be lover's liege, clambering up a couplea stools and tables to hop up to the raftas of the place, performing enough acrobatics to make a gymnast blush, and gets a gooder position o'er the big Yertu man. A strike from 'ere could easily cripple the bastard, even if ya missed you'd still 'cause a significant amounta damage.
In the corner, a hooded man's been watchin' Sloan scamper up there with a free Eagle's eye, quite impressed that a man o' his stat're could perform such a feat.
>>137521
>"But of course my friend! Besides, it would not be right to charge you given you just arrived in the city."
He takes a slight bow, then tends to the other customers.
>>137541
Maybe lol
>>137569
6PM in what timezone?
>>137592
Eastern Standard Time.
>>137597
Will the thread be alive by then? Won't it sage out?
>>137597
Sounds fine.
>>137622
I'd make us a new thread, all offical lookin' and such.
>>137632
Oh okay. Neat. Yeah sounds fine. I'll add my alarm for 6pm sharp. what will it be called so I can search for it.
>>137653
Wanderin' Rednecks Quest, 'less I can think ova better title. And with that, good night boyz!
Lord Ramsay Bolton of Winterfell has arrived, peasants.
>Human Duelist
