![maxresdefault[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/LW0v84V.jpg "maxresdefault[1].jpg")
You wake up one day as Joseph Goebbels at the height of Nazi Germany.
What is the first thing you do?
>>76220614
jerk off
"Finish off the Eternal Anglo while you still can Adolf"
>>76220614
Eat breakfast then do some rad cult shit before hitting up that pool party with the big H.
Flee the country. It's doomed
Shut their filthy lying mouths of course.
>>76220614
Kill Hitler so he doesn't single-handedly fuck up Germany's military strategy and let the generals do their fucking jobs.
>>76220614
get german pussi
>>76220614
try and overthrow Hitler and end the horrible racist regime
>Führer, I think you should wait on this Russian invasion for a while
>>76220614
Rape my hot as fuck Aryan daughters, since they'll die young anyways.
>>76220614
continue redpilling
>>76221040
>>76220614
Do a barrel roll.
>>76220614
a barrel roll.
>>76220614
If I had to come up with something right now - a barrel roll.
>>76221419
>>76221353
>>76221257
Thanks for your insight.
Kill some fucking Jews
>>76220889
>generals dindu nuffin Rommel a gud boi, bout to turn his life around and take the Suez n shit
>>76220614
Enigma. Enigma is being decoded. Yet i doubt it would save them.
>We need ejaculation machines in the camps, Adolf.
>>76222234
You'll poo on them first eh Pajeet?
If I was him, I'd start some propaganda focusing on USA and UK, specifically around the 'master race' fallacies and how life was in the camps.
It seems they completely missed this side of the subversion world.
Tell Hitler that I'm actually a communist spy.
No, wait, it's just a prank bro just a prank
>>76222234
Jew in the loo
>>76221123
who's that guy on the top row? was it considered normal back then to have a tall aryan guy as your family's personal bull?
>>76220614
>>76220614
Dont invade russia
>>76220614
Make informational films about the good conditions inside the concentration camps, complete with full walk through of share facilities and interviews with the prisoners, so there could be no doubt of poor treatment of people.
>>76222796
He was their master fucker, who routinely stuck his wee wee in all the little boys and girls bottoms.
>>76220614
>Be Goebbels
>Wake up
>WTF.gif
>Take Piece of Paper and a pencil
>"??/??/?????..."
Zyankalie scheint nicht tödlich zu sein, frage mich ob Marta und die Kinder auch schon wach sind. Schade dass der Führer in diesem Moment nicht auf mich gehört hat, töricht sich zu erschießen, hat doch schon der gute Doktor gemeint. Hoffen wir, dass Zyklon B nicht den selben Effekt hat.
J. Goebbels
Video tape the concentration camps and hide it some where so I can later prove that the holocost was a hoax!
>>76220695
First, best.
>>76222796
He was his wife's son.
>>76220614
Use my knowledge of ebin memes to win the propaganda war
>>76220614
>What is the first thing you do?
Release an official, approved and public statement saying that the NSDAP has never, will never and does not want to exterminate the Jews.
>>76222465
Enigma is more important than you think, cutting of the delivery of goods to Great Brittain would be very good.
I'd also recommend him to not bomb londen, and keep british civilians more safe. Looking more honorable would allow for the british to surrender on very good terms (get to keep the colonies, exchange war prisoners, full military access trough their colonies required).
Then push for russia.
Also, on my own, with my knowledge help build atomic bomb, and computers.
convince hitler that jewish scientists are useful and should be given immunity.
I'd increase funding on our Nuclear program. Bomb Britain back to the stone age and order my men to actually start killing Jews.
If things go according to plan we'd have nuked Washington by 44.
tell hitler to build nukes and never trust italy again
>>76225326
They were already working on nuclear research. Telling them that is useless.
>>76225726
It wasn't for nukes
Reverse engineer basic computing systems from the 1960s, combined with the advances in space technology of German scientists.
Bam. Ballistic missiles, and orbital radar. Threaten the USSR and the US, ally with the ones who comply and destroy the rest.
Change the communication systems
Dont attack cccp while fighing on the west
Destroy maltan islands
Dont cancel operation sealion
Increase research in nuclear weapons
Dont enter stalingrad, just surround it
Nuke stalingrad, washington and launch couple of SRB missles at london.
I literally have the knowledge in my head to bring Germany to the current century
Someone who knows WWII history really well - what's the actual response? what could you do to have nazi germany win the war? obviously if you could go back in time as yourself you could just bring a slew of books on WWII so they could read them, but if you were just stuck with relaying from memory, what would you say?
>>76227009
Don't attack Russia obviously.
>>76227009
Why would you want a war if you want Nazi Germany to succeed?
The goal should be to avoid the war. Europe doesn't lose millions of lives, the global colonial empires are not swept away in the aftermath, communism doesn't sweep the continent.
I'd just tell Hitler to fucking cool it about Danzig. Yes, yes, Germans being oppressed in Poland, blah blah. Who fucking cares? If Germany just waited and calmed the fuck down after eating 2 entire countries, eventually Danzig probably would have peacefully gone back to Germany in some sort of mutually beneficial agreement with Poland.
No war, Europe remains strong.
>>76227009
I'd bring basic computing and programming blueprints from the 50s to 70s I already memorized years ago and let their space research scientists do the rest.
In my opinion, Britain should be spared and annexed. They could crack Enigma, so they had some able "would be" programmers.
Bring the war to the orbital level against the remaining powers.
>>76220614
>wake up
>panic because I can't speak German
Fuck
>>76220614
Gobble down some German sausages. Mmhh.
>>76220889
This
>>76222796
Wife's son. He couldn't be present for the photo so he was manually shooped in (srs)
>>76220889
>wanting a war in the first place
The only power that had anything to gain from a major war in Europe was the bolshevik jews, so I wonder who was behind this post?
>>76220889
>implying
>>76221028
>watch Germany get absolutely destroyed
Kike pls go.
>>76220889
>Hitler was a bad strategist epic maymay
Without Hitler there would be no blitzkrieg
Hug the Fuhrer and tell him I have no regrets
>>76227009
Don't attack Russia or if Hitler still did, convince him to follow his generals origanal plan of sweeping through the caucus oil fields before going after Moscow. Also make sure to have better supply lines when invading Russia.
Also don't declare war on the US after Pearl Harbor.
I'd wiggle my finger around all day.
>>76220614
>>76227738
Ya mon
>>76227846
>tfw Goebbels and Hitler were both literally /pol/ incarnate
tell him to start the widescale production of mkb42 when it is available
dont wait until 1944
I'd immediately convince Hitler to give all nevessary funding to the nuclear program, accept the STG-44 plans that he didn't like earlier, and warn him that a more powerful engine is needed for the Tiger tanks.
I'd convince Himmler to put a lot more preparations for a nazi underground/insurgency, so if things turned out more or less the same as in this universe the West would still have a chance.
>>76220614
Urge Hitler to send spy teams to execute the Rothschild family down to the last child. Also attack the rockefellers. I'd also work to exposing the growing jewish scientific lobby, and I'd warn Hitler to execute Einstein, Oppenheimer and other American scientists to ensure they don't develop the atom bomb before Germany.
>Tell Japan to attack Russia instead of the USA
After Pearl Harbor everything went down hill, first the US enters the war, then Russia sends most of their troops to the west front and they get fucked in the invasion.
>Tell Hitler to send in Spies to kill Roosevelt and make it seem like commies were involved
>Double the encryption of the Engima Code
>Tell the useless japs to focus on Mother Russia
>Tell Mussolini to get off his fat ass and become more productive
>Tell Hitler to quickly find and execute Einstein; to win the war one must crack the atom
>Insist that he takes his general's advice
>Insist that he Blitzes the shit out of Moscow, apparently Stalin refused to leave it.
I don't know much about WW2; that's all I could really think of.
>>76220614
Start actually gassing Jews. If were going to get blamed for it either way we may as well have some fun.
>>76229662
/thread
>Assassinate Hitler
>Arrange a coup d'état
>Argue for a status quo ante bellum peace with the Allies
>>76225048
Medium rare
Convert to Judaism
Have Hitler's quack doctor killed.
Get him a real doctor and try to fix the shambles of a man his doctor made him into.
>>76227655
weak bait/10
>>76230082
Elaborate.
>>76220917
good goy
>>76231240
Giving the Fuhrer meth was a bad fucking idea.
>>76229603
>
>Tell Mussolini to get off his fat ass and become more productive
YES this one. Mussolini didn't do shit, he could've massively industrialized the Italian military and captured Greece and Turkey which would increase Italian morale to fight back against the Allies and keep the Axis in much longer.
>Tell Hitler to quickly find and execute Einstein; to win the war one must crack the atom
Einstein wasn't in the Manhattan Project, but his earlier findings independently were used. You would have to execute Oppenheimer or some shit.
>Insist that he takes his general's advice
Yep. Hitler was totally incompetent by the time he invaded Russia.
>Insist that he Blitzes the shit out of Moscow, apparently Stalin refused to leave it.
Maybe. But the Russian people were pretty resilient and wouldn't give up that easily.
>>76221123
He looks like a finkelstein.
>>76220614
Check my repeating digits.
>>76220614
Brush my teeth
>>76220614
Assassinate Hitler and make a secret deal with the Western Front uniting to shit all over Stalin
>>76220614
Suck Hitler's dick.
>>76231830
that image is fucking retarded. but your flag explains it all
>>76220614
Go to Auschwitz and put my dick in Jew babes
>>76231855
I'll check his dubs, too.
>>76220614
Stop the invasion of Poland and convince Hitler that his he only need invade Austria and the Netherlands to unite the Germanic peoples.
>>76231745
They just loaded him up on amphetamines, not all amphetamines are meth you faggot
>>76232615
Also seige Palestine and create a Jewish state as a alternative solution to the Jewish Question. After takeover of Austria and the Netherlands, increase relationships with all neighbours and tone down racial tensions, but peacefully and surely deport all none-Nordics to their respective homelands.
>>76232185
>Invade russia is the top tier misstake
>russian soldiers were persitent
TOP KEK, Stalin was going to attack germany in 28 days. Hitler were almost in moscva when it the war turned. Stalin made it so if someone in the russian army stepped back they would get shot by the russian battalion that shot anyone who tried to back away
>>76227547
Probably the Germans who built an entire fucking economy around rearmament and objectively couldn't have sustained shit if they didn't attack when they did.
>>76220614
Make lots and lots of memos about our plans to deport Jews to Israel/Madagascar. Make more memos about the issues of typhus and starvation in case war interrupted supply lines to camps. Convince the fuhrer that we CAN NOT allow our soldiers to be encircled at Stalingrad.
And send a nice card + keg of bier to Rommel.
>>76220614
That would be stressful. I imagine if I got in knowledge and experience I would then be able to do his job, which would be what I would do. But I also imagine that OP the wizard wouldn't allow me to retain my 20/20 foresight and to know that we will end up killing ourselves. Fuck though if it were just me I wouldn't be able to do his job, I would try to explain the situation to Adolf and tell him to get a new propaganda minister.
>>76232615
>yeah, fuck the millions of Germans in what used to be in Prussia and are now getting ethnically cleansed in Polad.
>>76220614
escape europe lol. Nothing against natsoc germany, but they were doomed.
>>76227009
>wanting Nazi Germany win
>>76233068
Oh wait, nevermind
>>76232615
>>76232860
You're /onlyknowaboutWWIIandthethirdReichfromHShistorycore/
>>76220614
OH
And Japan can't fuck with America, make them deal with their oil problems, it won't get any better when they're spending their limited resources fighting the Yanks, so attacking them is a lose/lose
Keep America out of the war and we have a fighting chance, of course this means there will be another pretext developed to bring America in.
>>76227399
best post
>>76233436
vidya is degenerate desu
>>76233436
>playing that bluepilled shitty game
m8 get some taste
>>76231830
>Find Einstein
>Explain to him that if he can help develop atomic weapons, Germany will ensure a Jewish state in either Israel or Madagascar, and pledge an eternal defense pact- as long as Jews stay there.
>Also give Jews the choice between identifying as German or Jewish
>oh wait this actually happened
>lots of Jews changed to German and served honorably in the Kriegsmarine, which for some reason didn't give a shit
>Encourage Jews to develop better submarines
>Jews dominate submarine warfare
>The Jew-state of Atlantis is established
fuck this might explain some of that south arctic conspiracy shit
>>76220614
A barrel roll.
>>76227611
Destroy UK with all your forces crossing the channel and raiding the air. While stalinis still killing his own generals.
Then when UK submits, shift the juggernaut towards the East.
But also play a defensive role during the winters.
>>76220614
L U G E N P R E S S E
>>76227611
You must be some retard.
>>76221028
>Fuhrer, I think we should better equip our soldiers for the cold climate during this Russian invasion.
>>76220614
Kill myself.
>>76223395
What does this say
>>76234864
something something i hope zyklon b doesn't have the same effect as cyanide
>>76220614
Telling Adolf that invading Russia at -50 degrees probably isn't the best idea.
My patience with the luegenpresse would find its limit.
>>76220889
>>76230091
Except that Hitler was right in all his major strategic decisions.
You idiots think that "the German generals" are some sort of super-entity that is omniscient and always in consensus.
The fact is, there were multiple different generals and different groups within the German high command, and different high commands for each branch of the military; each with their own ideas on priorities and how the war should be waged.
Hitler was intelligent enough to favor air power and motorized divisions for the war against France and Poland, which allowed the rapid victory. When logistics made a repeat of those tactics impossible in Russia, he switched tactics to a strategy more suited for the geography. Russia's infrastructure was so shitty, that logistics would have prevented Blitzkrieg. The army would have had to attack, stop, wait for resupply, attack, stop, wait for resupply, and would simple be cut apart by the Russians. Hitler's plan was to seize vital supplies from Russian territory to continue the war. When the tide turned, Hitler did not use an elastic defense, because the terrible winter would have killed his troops, and it was less attrition to try to dig in.
Of course, he still lost in the end, but anyone who knows anything about history knows that Hitler made the right call at every junction. Sometimes you can do everything right and still not win.
>Hurr then he shouldn't have invaded.
1. Russia was already threatening Germany's allies of Romania, Finland and the Baltic States. They were arming for the past 20 years and it was obvious in retrospect that they were planning on unleashing a communist takeover of all of Europe.
2.. It was the perfect moment to invade. Stalin purged his officers, and the Russians still hadn't relocated their forces to the west in preparation for war with Germany. Waiting would only have let the Russians prepare for the invasion and start the same war, except with the upper hand.
>>76237337
What should have Hitler done about America
get a sick set of dubs
>>76237678
Hitler's plan was to drop an atom bomb on New York and have the US surrender.
>>76237678
>>76237822
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amerika_Bomber
>>76237755
Checked
>>76237755
nice
> Tell Hitler we're not invading Russia until we have West Europe
> Come up with bullshit negotiatons to keep the burgers off our nuts
> After West Europe is done take East Europe
poison hitler and himmler
>>76237755
uberdubs
>>76237337
>to a strategy more suited to the geography
You mean refusing to allow his generals to give up any territory so they could establish real defensive positions for the winter?
>>76220614
Shit man -- I guess I'd try to learn German?
fuck my wife
>>76220614
Sex with jew girl prisoners.
>be Goebbels
>Halloween 1935
> go in Jew merchant outfit
> actually get thrown in a camp by the SS because of short stature, olive complexion, brown hair and brown eyes.
> Hitler has to come get you out
>>76220614
>seriously, don't fight the russians
>>76239010
>hitler has to come get you out
Implying hitler wouldn't leave you overnight for the lulz
>>76237755
>ebin
>the height of Nazi Germany
When do you consider this to be?
>>76220614
Buy a shotgun
take the jewish question into my own hands.
but honestly, I'd work on making lebensraum less of a factor and try and focus on spreading out less.
>>76220614
>Memo to Stalin
>Your base is safe, we won't rush A or B.
>Respectfully,
>Cyka Bylat
>>76237755
this post man
this is the post of the night
Can someone answer me this?
What was the purpose of the concentration camps? Were people able to leave them or were they forced to stay there?
>>76220614
>You wake up one day as Joseph Goebbels at the height of Nazi Germany.
>What is the first thing you do?
Create a NAZI bank, and compete with the jew banks offering fairer loan rates and run the kike banks out of business.
Win WWII without firing a shot.
https://youtu.be/tWRF2zOEtks
>>76220695
>why is joseph speaking english
>what the fuck is he talking about
>what is a "cuck"
>he seems even more depressed than before
>he has lost his mind, we should put him out of his misery
Shoot Hitler
Flee to Britain
Spill the beans on the holocaust
Become a national hero
Retire rich and famous
>>76237755
>only dub for Kek
>>76242126
Shitpost delux
shoot up drugs
>>76228655
They tried to kill Einstein, I think they put like a two-million-dollar reward for his death. Hitler hated him, he was Jewish after all, he escaped Germany with help of the u.s. if anything they should have use them as a scientist / prisoner, the E=mc2 equation was already created so making the atomic bomb wouldn't have been so hard, now that's dystopian future!.
