>be American
>wake up at 5AM because my commute is 2.5 hours and I need to gobble up some Sugarflakes™ before I leave
>at least I have my radio™ to entertain me on the way there
>my favorite morning show, "Earwax and Buttslap in the morning on WTYQSSIOPRKER 103.9 FM sponsored by Audible™ and Stitcher™, Sticher - never miss an episode™" is on
>30 seconds of commercials for every 10 seconds of song. It's ok though they're a business right
>finally get to work, my boss yells at me for being 7 minutes late and says I'll never get my 9 year old daughter back from the child deposit boxtm sponsored by LootCrate™ - what was your loot today?™at this rate
>another wave of layoffs this year because a streetpooper in India is willing to do my job for $3 a day and free laxatives
>I've been feeling a sharp pain in my chest when I inhale but my $15k/year insurance barely covers cough medicine
>work my usual 10 hour shift, I might be back by 11 today, this is great
>I have 49 minutes to watch TV
>too bad by $70/month Comcast™ subscription only covers daytime telenovelas
>if I want to watch the game I need the $200/month sports package sponsored by ESPN™ - get your game on™
>well hopefully I can play some vidya at least
>console needs to download the daily 3GB update, it's gonna take 19 hours
>fuck it
>just before I got to bed I remember I'll have to ask my boss for the day off on Sunday, I'm running low on "cheese"™ and "veggies"™, sponsored by Monsanto™ - innovation, collaboration, speed™ and I need to buy some
>greatest country™
>good night
>>71130401
build wall paco
>>71130401
Shitaly post
mama mia
>be me
>Italian
>wake up from a big kiss from hairy mama
>big Italian breakfast with extended family
>ends in a fist fight but then everyone kisses each other on the cheek
Sorry if this is inaccurate, Italy is too irrelevant to have any prominent stereotypes
>>71130487
That's Italy you autist
>>71130487
WHO'S GONNA PAY FOR THE WALL?
iTALY
>>71130849
Literally just need to hover mouse over the flag
top kek
>>71130401
Beautiful
>>71130401
>>71130401
>(You)™
>>71130487
america at its finest
>>71130401
>be Italian
>wake up with a dick in my ass
>>71131360
>Not being of at least Italian heritage
>Not having Nonna feed you bruschetta while you watch your morning cartoons
>Not watching Nonno install a turbo on his Ford Meteor
>Not being treated like a mortal God the whole day with amazing food being offered to you every waking moment
>Not having Nonna tuck you in to bed and stroke your hair while you pray with her in Italian not knowing what she's saying just repeating after her
>Wake up the next day to do it all again
You missed out
>>71130401
Not one person got shot
0/10
>Earwax and Buttslap
That's fucking great, I laffd.
But seriously though our morning shows are the best in the world.
>americans think they have the best standard of living in the entire world
I makes me sad that they will never know the truth.
>>71132255
Isn't posting online haram in the German caliphate now?
>>71132255
I quite like not hearing the Imaam calling me to prayer 5 times a day like you Mohammad.
>>71132356
>>71132508
I pity you my little brainwashed Amerilards.
>>71131757
I'm fine with not missing my parents
>>71132590
What makes your lifestyle superior to ours?
Also which province do you live in. Just so I get an idea.
>>71130401
At least eat good cereal if you're going to fuck your body with carbs.
>>71130401
>be Italian
> wake up
>smell trash
>organized run garbage collection has not been by in weeks
>come down stairs to say hi to qt 3.14 16 yearold daughter before she leaves for school
>she is being fucked on the breakfast table by Berlusconi.
>he is sniffing coke of her tits, offers me a line
>I decline
>get ready for work, go outside, walk to bus stop
>213 gypsies ask my for Euro on the way there
>bus is late
>hear "allahu ackbar!"
>get stabbed by Syrian migrant who crossed the Med, and was granted asylum despite being part of ISIS due to EU rules
>>71132716
Lower Bavaria.
clap' clap' clap'
welcome to america
Oh mama mia! Thatsa spiceya meataball!
>>71130401
>my favorite morning show, "Earwax and Buttslap
I don't know why I laughed so hard at this
>>71130401
>be (sh)italian
>get invaded and lose colonies
>>71133301
>be greece
>don't pay denbts
>>71132971
>he lives in lower Bavaria
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. YOURE A FUCKING LOSER.
>>71133416
>>71132971
So you are saying you enjoy a higher standard of living in lower Bavaria, because?
And don't you forget it.
>>71130554
India, always eager to demonstrate its vast knowledge on the matters of shit 'n shiet.
>>71133523
Why?
>>71133653
Because its pretty high.
>>71132590
At least we have freedom of speech, Hans. You might want to be careful lest the Bundespolizei find out that you're browsing a right wing website.
>>71131066
>2016
>not exclusively browsing on a mobile phone
>>71130401
LOL
>>71130401
well said
>>71131308
c'mon anon, we all know italy is really just east mexico
>>71133850
How so. What do you enjoy that America don't?
>Be the boss
>Get in whenever the fuck I want
>Make money from the wage slaves
>Snort coke off your 17 year old Italian daughter's ass
>Livin the dream
>>71133850
Too many non-white people.
>>71130401
I lold
>>71130817
At least they have a culture.
>Be Hungarian
>wake up at 6:30 AM
>eat healthy, affordable organic food
>listen to a song that I pirated without the FBI breaking down my door
>switch to radio
>radio host announces that another hundred sandniggers were stopped near the wall that we have already built to keep out the hsitskins
>get on the bus
>kinda expensive but I can afford it and it takes me anywhere in the city rather quickly
>arrive at university
>attend to classes, math, boring shit
>friends and I tell a bunch of racist jokes to each other to entertain ourselves in the break
>loudly
>no SJW bitching interrupts
>we don't get falsely accused of rape
>economy class
>teacher starts by telling a Jew joke
>everyone laughs
>go home
>play vydia that I pirated without the FBI breaking down my door
>TV is for plebs, so I don't watch it unlike dumbass Americans
>go to 4chan
>start a shitposting rampage against Romanians
>go to sleep after I finished
>thank God that I was born Hungarian
Yeah.....we got blown out.
>>71133526
You're the national equivalent of white trash. >Borrow money from friends
>Live beyond your means
>time comes to pay
>Laugh at them
>Hit them up for more money.
>>71130487
minor flag mistake, his point stands. They see us consumin, they hatin'
>>71132716
Healthcare, free and good universities and schools, lower unemployment, higher income p capita, we have an actual working democracy...
Want me to go on you brainwashed fuck?
>>71134572
Godspeed, Hungary the Great.
pretty accurate
italy sucks donkey balls in other ways though
>>71130487
First post best post.
Don't care if Paco or Guido pays for the wall as long as it isn't me.
>>71134572
>be hungarian
>average citizen lives in literal poverty
kek
>>71134280
He's never going to answer.
>>71135034
At least they are more than 60% white.
>>71131151
You prowd ain't you ?
>>71135034
By PPP they have double that, half of the US. To Trade they have: No shitskins, no blacks, relative safety, can walk down the street without getting shot and are capable of living without being the defacto cuck of big business .
I'd trade half of my income for all of that.
>>71134880
Lol you keep resorting to name-calling when I'm trying to carry on an actual discussion.
I would like to argue that I enjoy one just as good as yours. Despite not receiving free healthcare or schooling. I paid for school and i receive benefits from my employer. I still enjoy a life where I can vacation, eat out, go to ball games and still have money left over for anything else along with solid savings and investments. Oh and a Retirement plan provided by my company with a company match!
>>71130401
You forgot about muh Ford F-450 Superdoody pick-up.
>>71133526
Nigga you gonna get invaded again. Only victory you had going on was against the persians a couple thousand years ago.
Alexander the great doesn't count because he was macedonian. Macedonians aren't greeks because if they would have been greeks they would have been called greeks not macedonians.
Oh you won against the italians....
>>71135406
Well, sorry for insulting you I though rhis was 4chan.
How many aren't as lucky as you though? I'd rather rely on a government (which is rather trustful over here) than on a company.
>>71130401
This is the truth.
It reminds me of when I was working in america in a hotell and these americans were compoaining about the economy then they spotted me and was like
>you not american right?
>i was like no
>my blue eyes and blonde hair gave me away
>you guys have it pretty rough though right
>that is why you here in america greatest land in world!
>as i looked at the man with a bleached tie and holes in his shoes I replied
>no we have it great actually, we are rich as fuck, i am just here for the experience
>he frowned and said
>funny ha ha norway? Rich? Joking can you paint my shoes
>i then painted his shoes with black paint, the americans businessman could not afford a new pair of shoes
>>71132873
Kek
>>71132971
How are the goats and the donkeys?
>>71135715
Wasn't insulted, I just expected someone to be able to carry out a discussion without resorting to insults to prove a point.
I guess the difference between our lifestyles is, in America we don't like to breed reliance on the government. By virtue it is the American way of life to work to earn a high standard of living, not have it handed to you by the government.
>>71130401
>be Mexican
>die of dysentery and getting shot by cartels
accurate description of america 2bh.
>>71135778
Go get cha fuckin shine box
It was ok 6/10.
>>71136244
He tipped me his entire hourly wage too, 7 dollars.
>>71130849
That's Mexico. Cartel stole the Eagle, and they can't send Vorenus and Pullo to get it back because Vorenus got beheaded and Pullo is in jail for failing to bribe a cop.
It's actually all true *shrugs*
Can't be mad at Italy for saying the truth. Can only blame ourselves for letting ourselves get jew'd so hard.
>>71136509
Whatever you say shine boy
>>71132873
More like
>Woke up
>Be Italian
Do I really need to go on?
>>71130401
Quality shitpost. It'll go over the heads of Americans. Not your fault, they're just dumb.
>>71135715
If a company fucks you over, you can turn to the government to help.
If the government fucks you over, you'd better just bite the pillow and hold on tight.
And your government isn't very trustworthy considering the 1.2 million, and 800,000. Merkel wants more, and complaining gets you put in prison.
When we complain about Obama, he goes on TV and tears up.
When you complain about Merkel you get sent to Miniluv.
>>71135392
Also free healthcare and university.
>>71136691
You forgot
>be master race
you're welcome José
>>71136509
>>71135778
watching Norway try to bring the bantz is like watching a child fumble with a loaded gun. You are smart enough to do it, but your autism is far too high to succeed.
>>71137069
I didn't know the Master Race gets curbstomped by half-naked greeks with 50 year old rifles.
>be Italian
>wake up
>realize I'm not white
>kill self
>>71137291
Well not everyone can get curbstomped by rice eating manlets on top of getting blown the fuck out by niggers on a daily basis, to each their own I guess.
>>71136723
I got a laugh out of the radio comment. I can literally drive to work without hearing a song on the radio.
>>71137292
t. "white" american
>>71137074
Funny I thought the same about americans when they say they are white.
>>71137575
meh, over used
2/10, go enjoy some more rock and coke.
>>71134533
You're one to talk Schnitzelhaus Muhummed.
>>71137292
>America
>Fun
that's an oximoron
>>71137448
At least we can afford to go half way around the world and get curbstomped.
You couldn't manage to keep Greece in check for a year and they're practically next door.
>>71131757
You forgot the part where Nonno sneaks in your room at night to show you his spicy Italian sausage.
>>71137762
Dude check your watch, it is time to bend over facing mecca and pray to Obama burger.
>>71137869
At least we couldn't manage due to poor industry, resources and technology. Having the shiniest shit and a continent full of resources and failing is much more embarrassing if you ask me.
>>71138012
You'd know about praying to Mecca, Sven.
>>71136139
Americans don't know geography and flags. Nothing new.
>>71136106
>thinking German standard of lifestyle is provided by the gov't
How can you be this deluded? Were you fucked by a bald seagull in the head when you were a baby?
>>71138063
Hey, what can I say? How do you win a war in which the objective is to kill as many Asians as you can? They breed like rats and live mostly underground in Vietnam. We didn't know they'd spill out of the countryside the moment we left the country.
But all you had to do was keep some Greeks from overrunning you. You even had the Germans backing you up. The Germans!
C'mon, Guido.
>>71138087
Wrong country lardass we are like pepsi to your 10 gallons of coke.
>>71138237
>implying you're not a Swede in Norway
>implying there's even really a difference
:^)
>>71138128
If you need to have the joke explained to you, you need to stop posting and lurk more.
>>71130401
>be Italian
>
being Italian is already a curse in itself
>>71138012
Better than bending over, whistling and shining my shoes you fucking dit.
I actually work at lootcrate
>>71138235
That's going to happen when the only reason you join a war as unprepared as Italy was is because you think it's almost over and you only want some deaths on your count so that you can sit at the table of negotiations. Huge mistake on our side.
Not even all of Mussolini's generals even wanted to join the war knowing how bad our military was at the time.
>>71138591
Yeah. Nobody expected Hitler to go Full Napoleon when he did.
>>71136244
>>71133757
Jazz hands please don't want to trigger someone
>>71132590
How can you pray to Mecca and shitpost at the same time, Muhammad?
>>71137448
>Whoop ass and kill millions of gooks in 'nam for years
>finally get tired of it, ask them if they want peace agreements
>bucktoothed North Vietnamese agree to peace terms
>we leave to go do more important shit
>Gyuinngyen Nguyen and his buddies see American ships and planes leaving their rathole jungle swarming with the bodies of dead chinks towards the land of milk and honey
>"a-ah the americans gone?"
>North vietnam breaks peace agreement and storms saigon
>Americans too busy living life in the lap of luxury to give a shit
>"w-we won, t-t-take that a-a-america. please don't hurt us anymore"
>Buttmad French that caused the instability in the region in the first place and left with their tails between their legs get so asshurt that they spread a myth of America losing the war
>Eurofags pissed that their American semen rations have been cut latch onto the myth
>40 years later Guglionni altopasta Abututoniostabalous makes a thread on an american website that he browses daily, wearing his American blue jeans and consuming american culture about how much he hates America
>never get my 9 year old daughter back from the child deposit boxtm sponsored by LootCrate™ - what was your loot today?™
I lol'd happily.
>>71138384
Yeah imagine being paid for 13 months a year, what a curse that would be
>>71130401
Bravo!
>>71138225
Thats what he was implying by his post.
>>71139305
Yeah, but it's in worthless pastabux.
>>71132255
And they think they are free, top kek they never knew freedom.
>>71139562
Our purchasing power ain't so bad especially if you live in the North.
>>71130401
Build wall pacotti
>>71130554
P O O I N L O O
O
O
I
N
L
O
O
>>71134533
>implying
Come on, Ahmed, you're posting on an example of American culture right now.
>>71133526
Only pussies pay debts. Hello, bestfriend
>>71137051
>free
>>71137051
>Free
>hey guys lets pay more money the rest of our lives so we don't have to pay more money for the rest of our lives
>>71135157
Watching their daughters, wives, sisters and mothers all take Arab, Turkish and North African cock in every orifice. They enjoy watching. That's something we don't nor ever will. God damned fucking pussy Krauts.
>>71137575
Just further proved his point.
I work 10 hours a day 6 days a week
>how
I own a small business and we are closed on sundays
>>71133870
>2016
>Being too poor to afford a basic netbook
Seriously, they are like $150 at walmart
>>71143428
And you can get a half-decent Android tablet for less than 90 bucks now
>>71143023
Cuck
>>71132356
Kek
