So I've thought about it a lot and met up with some Jewish friends and decided to convert to Judaism.
You're my last opinion. Why shouldn't I /pol/? Red pill me this Bat man?
>>56772124
Work as a double agent for us. Find their Jew gold stash.
>>56772192
>>56772259
You can't beat them, join them, right?
i'll probably be doing the same in the next year or two
why cant her family just be the hollywood jew type
>>56772124
Are you racist? Dishonest? Hypocritical? Think you're superior to everyone? Are you actively seeking a special seat in hell?
The more you answer yes to, the more Judaism is right for you.
>>56772124
Op, you're just in it for the shekels aren't ya?
>>56772124
Just don't become a Zionist. They're pure evil. Although tbqh if you need religion to be happy, you're weak. I'm glad to only have my pure 2D waifus. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vZFN-lfMI7M
would impregnate
>>56772332
they will never fully accept you tho
>>56772124
>Why shouldn't I,/pol/?
Because it is not fucking Islam.
Judaism stopped being the gate to heaven ever since Christianity appeared, and Christianity stopped being the gate to heaven ever since Islam appeared.
>>56772366
:^D
Protip: they don't want you.
>>56772435
>the conditions for entry into heaven change as each revelation occurs
You realise how fucking stupid that is right?
Jewish people in America tend to vote for Democrats like Obama and FDR because they know that Democrats have the right vision to lead a diverse and secular society
>>56772124
Why would you join a religion?
>>56772473
Why? I am white and can easily get a Jewish gfs. I just have to go to the Jewish parties I ignore the invites too. Also I'm already a free mason
>>56772505
I just had a revelation, Islam is shit and I'm the new profit. Eat slim jims everyday and eternal life will be yours
>>56772635
You don't need a revelation to know Islam is shit
>>56772124
I want her to fuck black guys and laugh at my penis.
>>56772260
Let me know when you do, OP
>>56772538
Kool-aid
>>56772124
Mormonism is the correct answer. Plus all the traditional minded females.
>>56772124
Jews don't accept converts as real jews. You would be converting into a religion in which you will never really be a member of.
>>56772538
>>56772635
I can get behind this.
>>56772838
Aw fuck they're on to us!
it's hard, that's why you shouldn't
>>56773210
Fuck off bob, you don't get any gold.
>>56773290
I know Latin. Why is it hard? The language or the secret club mentality?
>>56773566
the rules which you must follow during your conversion are difficult to follow
>>56772124
>>56772894
My family and my village is half the reason you flags aren't in New York anymore and had to walk to Utah. Fuck off
>>56772124
i dont think you can convert
not that you should
>>56773724
Like? Could you give examples? It'd help to know a bit before hand and even through internet searches I have found very little on the subject
>>56773899
And your reasons are...?
>>56772260
This. The Jews have a secret new cave where they hold all their Jewish gold, little do you know pol, the Jews did it.
They bankrupted the world.
>>56772366
This as well, also, do you accept gold and killing got ins as your lord and savior?
>>56774037
If I was going to do anything it would definitely not be for /pol/. No offense but this is board is way more than a little crazy
>>56772435
>Iraqis
>giving advice on religion
Come on m8. You can't be serious
>>56772538
>a diverse and secular society
You mean a jewwy jewwy jew society? Yes, I imagine a Jew would like that...
>>56773724
>>56773566
Hebrew isn't hard. Like any other language, it takes a long ass time.
Now studying for the talmud is something I had no patience for. Fuck that.
>>56772124
I'm jewish. It's great
>>56772435
I liked you better when you were Zoroastrians.
>>56772898
My Jewish children will be when I marry Jewish
>>56774317
I have read and studied the works of James Joyce. How hard can it really be?
>>56772124
You do realize that even after you "convert" you'll never be seen as a true Jew by the Jews right?
You'll be seen as that tryhard cattle who wants to be recognized as a human. Any offspring you create will never be Jews even if you impregnate a Jew. You'll be the laughing (and live) -stock- of your "peers"
Now since you're so desperate to be accepted then I suggest Islam.
Islam will fully accept you as a brother regardless of what you look like or where you come from.
>>56774623
Do you know how big the talmud is m8? just search it up on google images. It's an entire library by itself.
sauce OP?
>>56774902
Alright you convinced me. Where can I get a NatSoc gfs then? That's right. Didn't think so
>>56775327
I got it off /int/
Try google images reverse image search
>>56772124
Alright OP, I'll be the one to say it sense most of these newfags cant tell the different between /pol/ memes and reality.
Become a Jew. Jews ARE Gods chosen people. Most people on /pol/ who are resentful of Judaism were never accepted into the culture because of various things (refusing circumcision because they're some filthy pagan religion, not being competent enough to fully understand the Talmud, not stepping up to the plate and being responsible enough to be considered one of Gods Chosen People, etc).
Most of the /pol/ old fags, and probably a few of the newfags once they realize /pol/ is purely satirical, would gladly give up our shitty lives to be devoted to the one true religion and find ACTUAL purpose in life.
But the simple fact of the matter is 99.99% of us aren't worthy, and we know it, so we make holocaust jokes on the internet to hold back the tears.
If you're man enough, then join Judaism so we can all vicariously be successful through you.
>>56775538
That's a very interesting take on it. I think I could be but I'd have to see the tests first. Thank you for the insight
>>56774902
Haha
Listen, if your girl, his Mom, is Jewish, even as a convert, your kid will be Jewish.
>>56773724
Not what I heard.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SbXSRLv57Tg
>>56773759
source?
>>56772124
who is this semen demon
>>56772124
If you don't mind losing your soul and a bit of your foreskin
>>56775371
>>56775327
We need source, as in things that can't be googled easily. She goes by the name of dirtbagwife, she deleted her tumblr and some of her pics are scattered all over. We need a collection, stat.
>>56775538
but we ARE praciticing correct judaism
it's called "christianity"
>>56772124
If you do join THE IDF and rise through their challenges and become part of the Zionist Corporation.
Ill see you there.
>>56775952
The Strain.
Pretty much a zombie apocalypse but with vampires and it shows the apocalypse at the start, it doesn't just jump into it like the walking dead. If you've read World War Z, it's kinda like it's set during the Great Panic.
>>56774262
fuk that scene was goat even tho i can't remember a single thing about it. wha'ts going on here? i need to watch it again.
>>56772124
I don't care if you do, they will never consider you an actual jew though so it's pointless really.
>>56772124
I don't think its as simple as simply "converting", jews are opposite than christians, they don't accept newcommers at all unless there are some god-tier reasons. More than that, you might be considered a "jew" in another state than israel, then come to israel and you will not be considered "kosher jew" and you'll have to go through israeli converting protocols which are tougher.
>>56772124
Just post more of that girl
>>56772124
>Converting to Judaism
kill yourself
>>56774902
funny how every person here feels like he can bullshit whatever he wants about the Jews.
Seems like the most predominant characteristics of /pol/, after gullibility is pathologically lying.
The Secular Jews (most common in Israel) fully accept converts as Jews, And so do the reformists (the most common Jews in the US).
The orthodox will accept you if you are sincere and actually follow all the rules a good Jew must follow, mostly about Shabath and what you can and can't eat as well as some prayers.
Now the ultra orthodox will not accept you fully. They will accept you as a Jew, but will consider you lesser one (like they consider the reformed and secular Jews). And that if you follow the rules of Judaism, if you won't follow the rules they won't consider you a Jew at all.
You also must convert through the ultra-orthodox Synagogues to be considered a Jew by them, the orthodox and Israel.
If you marry a Jewish wife (not convert) your children will be considered fully Jewish in every aspect.
If you marry a non Jew than your children would be considered Jewish by seculars and reformists and less so by orthodox and not at all (I believe) by Ultra orthodox.
>>56777960
>that body
>that face
>that hair
>>56772124
I'm black (actually half anglo - half african but black as fuck in /pol/'s eyes) and i'm thinking of converting or at the very least marrying a jew.
I feel like as a black man the jews are already on my side and we're winning.
/pol/ wants us both in an oven.
At least jews want to give me white women and make money from my musical, entertainment and or athletic talents.
Jewish Exploitation > lynched by neo-nazis desu senpai
>>56780961
You're Mulatto you fuck
Bump for more of that girl
>>56772124
Everybody is free to join a sect. But don't expect any respect from me.
Could you post the source of that .gif, if you please?
>>56773290
Depends, I don't think he'll, be going for Lev Tahor. If he goes the reform route, he'll just have to cut his penis and go to schul for a year or so.
After that mate, do aliyah get the free money and back up passport.
Even for those who don't care about religeon, giving up a few hours Fri/Sat for 2 years max, and getting a free passport and US money, isnt a bad deal
