Long story short: A cow escaped from a farmer I know and hides in the woods. The local hunters and veterinarians are completely useless and can't catch it.
Basically, "it was trained to ignore pain and the weather, and to eat things a goat would puke up". Consider the cow an animal Rambo.
How can we catch it? This is Germany, so it must be a low-key operation so the local law enforcement won't fuck us up.
Additional information:
- the forest is pretty dense
- the cow is brown, and hides well over the day
- we know the general area she lives in
- she only comes out during dusk
- she already ignored the knockout darts and is clever enough to avoid food traps
She seems scary smart and tough from what I know. Any ideas how to catch such an animal without hurting it?
>>779173
>ignored the knockout darts
how does one "ignore" darts? if they can take down an elephant or a rhino, a moo cow should be no problem
if you know the area, maybe set up some tree stands and sit in wait to try and lasso it
>>779185
>how does one "ignore" darts? if they can take down an elephant or a rhino, a moo cow should be no problem
Obviously, the dose was shit. I told you the official guys here are useless.
>if you know the area, maybe set up some tree stands and sit in wait to try and lasso it
Lasso'ing a cow? In a forest?
>"it was trained to ignore pain and the weather, and to eat things a goat would puke up"
Get her military supervisor?
>>779203
>Lasso'ing a cow? In a forest?
more or less dropping a noose over it
either that or get some fireworks and scare it out of the woods
>>779185
i work on a farm and this one time we had a batshit insane cow that went mental at anyone who came near it... the vets tried a high dose of ketamine, nothing... tried a triple dose of ketamine, nothing... tried an elephant grade of ketamine - and that combined with the previous does almost sort of worked a bit, finally the thing just slowed down enough to spook it into a trailer so we could take it to the slaughterhouse.
adrenaline can counteract tranquilliser shit is the basic gist of it.
anyways... OP the best i can think of is to set up some sort of funnel into a coral she can be trapped in. you'll need to herd the fucker with a whole bunch of people and just hope she gets funnelled into whatever you have set up. or try an double elephant grade dose of ket.
>>779213
underrated post kek!
You have to consider the weight when dosing for tranquilizer
>>779173
Puppers m8
She has earned her freedom. Let her enjoy it.
> Paleo Euros kill off all wild animal life on the contient
> Modern Euros can't catch a cow
Mfw Clan of the Cavebear is dead
It's called a gun.
good luck with that, OP.
I had 10 steer get out and they did NOT want to come back. Not interested in grain- ran when they saw people. I got them into a large corral I made that was baited with food, and got them back again.
Seems like a solo one you could try to get a rope on, somehow, with a heavy chain attached. It would tire out eventually. Maybe some sort of snare trap that could loop something on it?
Before my steer escaped, some others got away from another farmer nearby. They tried to dart the unsuccessfully and eventually shot them dead becuase they were too close to the highway.
>>779173
Easy peasy. Take a lead and a jar of peanut better with you. find cow, put lead on cow, rub a bit of peanut butter on top of it's nose, proceed to lead cow home.
Not even kidding.
>>779234
I can't even begin to fucking imagine a cow high as fuck on enough ketamine to fuck up an elephant.
>>779173
Cows are adorable
>>779173
lasoo, tie other end to tree
>>779984
I named mine Bella
>>780000
pics?
>>779458
Came here to post this
>>779996
This
Hell, if it's just a spooked domestic, you'll be able to walk it out after you rope it.
I've thrown a belt over the head of escaped cows and lead them home with such.
>>779173
Not sure about cows, but I used to track pigs and various other animals that escaped from a hunting preserve.
Pigs, were dangerous because some would wait until you were 10 feet from it and charge you. There were a couple that ran straight off a cliff.
Depending on how spooked the cow is, it doesn't hurt to make a lot of noise and/or throw shit every so often.
>>779435
>Puppers
This.
>Wait for them to forget about cow
>Go out and shoot cow
>Free cow for you
>>779173
Get yourself enough body bags. You wont catch this one without a good fight.
If the cow has learned to climb trees, you're going to need some aerosol sleeping agent. Spray the wooded area liberally with Cow Off. Wait for the cow to fall out of tree she's hiding in.
Note: if she's taken to tunneling and digging hides holes, pigs might be able to find her.
>>779458
Donna donna donna donna...
>>780215
>be me cow
>walking around pasture minsing my own business
>ass hole farmer says can't walk through his pasture
>takes me to his pen, stableboys hose me down
>flashbacks.webm
>break out hide in woods
>farmer can't catch me calls in the feds
>feds guns are useless i am a cow of the forest
>only person that can save me is some anon from /out/
>he tells me to give up, it's over
>IT'S NEVER OVER
>>779173
Leave her be. Obviously she hates you fucks.
Why is cows always food? They are such nice animals too.
>>779173
Hit it with a 20mm rifle.. You'll stop it from running. Oh wait euroland... Right. Did you try asking it nicely? If that doesn't work send a letter to your local council member and get a document in writting to serve to the cow so it will have no choice but to listen.
Anyone one have a cow that moos a lot and is good about being led around places? One cow will call out the other. Then just mostly ignore escapee cow until you walk the first one home. Escapee cow will peacefully follow. Also, food is a huge motivator.
>>779173
>track cow
>find where it beds down at night
>slowly build fence around the area
>leave out feed
>cow will trust you slowly as you feed it grain works best.
Learned this when we lost a heifer and found it living in a gully 2 years later.
>>779435
Thats what dogs are for
Do we have any Intel about possible traps the cow might have put down? I know a cow that used to lay -slip'n'slide fecal mines.
If cow fights for life, let it live. Unlike all other cow
>>779234
What a waste of special K
>>779173
learn to be australian and or cowboy you shit head euros how can you not catch one cow
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iTYyDD1iRoU
>>782012
>learn to be australian
suicide would be better than this.
>>780215
kek nice
>>783143
>I thought they were useless in the wild because they were dependent on us.
most cattle in the US at least are released into the wild for the summer. Or at least a big chunk of wild with fences and cattle guards around it.
I think something like half of the cattle we raise are let out on National Forest and BLM land. They do fine.
>>779173
>>779203
>>779234
Ketamine comes in different concentrations, but even pure ketamine would take a decent dose to bring down a cow. If you want to put the bitch to sleep, you need etorphine. Google it if you don't know what it is. One drop transdermally will kill a human being, so if you dart her with some of that, she'll be out in seconds. It's also only available in Europe as a veterinarian prescription.
>>783150
>etorphine
Literally too powerful yet I know it will take my pain away.
How do you dose, by the molecule know Jesus.
And um, just how do you know this anyway?
>>783150
Would this have been fast acting enough to save that gorilla?
They said they had to shoot it because it was the fastest way to stop it.
>>779173
you need to get the cows former vietnam buddies so it can convince the lost cow that "the war is over"
>>783138
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h46ry-hpM3o
it happens if you don't run fast enough
>>779984
This.
I was on the island of Nevis in the caribbean, and one evening some cows got out from a nearby farm. I watched them run through this valley, literally jumping and kicking their heels into the air. Cutest thing of all time tbqh.
>>780215
> the filename
kek
>>780228
top story mate
>>783143
Longhorns in Texas were wild long before we settled the area.
Assuming german rombo cow has a decent source of water, it can possibly live out its natural life. There aren't many natural predators to cows in germany.
>>784952
Learned something new. I expect to hear an increase in spooky stories from German campers now.
>>779458
Kek! 100% agree.
Bru, wie kann man in Deutschland eine Kuh in einem Wald verlieren?
WIR HABEN NICHT MAL RICHTIGE WÄLDER?!
